October 12
201 days to go

“I got us reservations for six,” Tina says to Blaine as they walk through the choir room door. They were the last ones there after glee practice, staying behind to do some a quick run through of their duet for this week’s assignment. They’re ready to perform on Monday now. Blaine nods in understanding as he crosses the hallway to his locker. “Then the movie starts at – “ Tina’s sentence is cut off by a loud squeal, sudden laughter, and the sound of running feet. Blaine looks up in alarm and sees Tina launching herself into Mike’s arms.

Mike - who has been in another state for university.

Mike - who has clearly come back for the weekend with the sole purpose of spending time with Tina.

He tries not to be jealous, but it doesn’t exactly work. He misses Kurt. Blaine hasn’t felt completely whole since the day Kurt left. They’re making it work with Skype and phone calls and texts, but it’s still difficult. He’s aware that Kurt has a huge paper due on Monday. It’s his first big assignment in university and Blaine knows that he’s determined to make it perfect. So they haven’t spoken as much this past week because of Kurt’s paper and Blaine’s commitment to his duet with Tina. Blaine hadn’t realized how much that lack of communication has been affecting him until now. He quickly looks down and tries to shove his books into his messenger bag as quickly as possible in order to give them privacy.

“Hey Blaine.” Mike’s voice breaks through his thoughts. He looks up just as Mike clasps him on the shoulder with his free arm. Tina has tucked herself into his side and has Mike’s other arm wrapped securely around her shoulders.

“Hey Mike.” Blaine says warmly, a smile gracing his face despite his inner turmoil. He’d always liked Mike; they’d had a good friendship last year. They had spoken over facebook a few times in the past month too. It was good to see him again.

Blaine turns back to his locker as Mike starts speaking to Tina again. “I thought I could take you out tonight. I have to leave tomorrow afternoon, so I got us reservations for dinner. Is that okay?”

“Oh.” Blaine hears Tina’s disappointment in that one word and quickly schools his face into a neutral expression before turning around.

“Don’t worry about our plans, Tina. Mike’s only here for one night. We’ll do something next week.” Blaine smiles at her, it’s forced but hopefully she won’t be able to tell the difference.

“But it’s your birthday.” Tina protests weakly, looking between Mike and Blaine. He can tell that she’s torn. She clearly doesn’t want to ditch Blaine on what is supposed to be a special day, but Mike’s only in town for one night.

“And we can celebrate next week. My parents didn’t really want me to go out tonight anyway. They got home from the business trip early this morning to surprise me.” The lie slips through his lips easily. Blaine hates lying, but he doesn’t want Tina to feel bad. If the positions were reversed and Kurt was the one visiting, he’d want Tina to let him take a rain check on their plans.

“If you’re sure…” Tina says slowly, like she’s not completely certain yet.

“Of course I’m sure. We’ll do something next Friday and by then we’ll be able to celebrate the successful completion of our duet too. It’s perfect.” Blaine smiles at Tina again, hoping that it’ll be enough to convince her. He knows how much she’s missed Mike; they’ve spent hours together moping about the woes of long distance relationships over ice cream. She needs this time with Mike and Blaine certainly isn’t going to be the one to take it away from her.

“Sorry man.” Mike finally speaks up again, a guilty look on his face. “I completely forgot it was your birthday.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Blaine quickly jumps in. “Have a good time tonight.” He closes his locker and waves goodbye to them both as he sets off down the hallway.

“Happy birthday!” They both yell in unison as he walks away.

---

The house is uneasily quiet when Blaine gets home. He’s usually pretty good with silence but it doesn’t feel quite right today. He hits the power button on the stereo in the living room, allowing whatever CD is in there to play. He’s pleased when the gentle strumming of an acoustic guitar filters through the speakers and breaks the eerie silences that had been filling the house.

He wanders through to the kitchen, contemplating what he could make for dinner tonight. Blaine dumps his school stuff unceremoniously on the counter before walking over to fridge. He stands in front of the open door for a few moments, willing food to appear, as it seems the empty shelves are mocking him. The lack of food hadn’t been too big of a problem before, as he’d planned to go out for dinner with Tina tonight, now he’d wished he had remembered to stop by a grocery store on the way home.

Blaine hears the dull vibration of an incoming text message on his phone from where it’s still nestled in his coat pocket, which is currently residing on the kitchen counter. After fumbling around for a moment, he sees a new text from Kurt.

Happy birthday, my love! I wish I could call you and say all the sappy things that a boyfriend is meant to tell you on your birthday, but I know you’re out with Tina and I don’t want to interrupt. Have a wonderful time and eat a slice of cheesecake for me. Call me later if you have a few moments.

Blaine smiles but he quickly feels a lump forming in his throat to accompany the pain in his chest that comes from missing Kurt. He doesn’t bother texting back, instead he hits the call button and hopes that Kurt isn’t in the middle of something.

“Blaine!” Kurt’s surprised voice sounds through the small speaker in the phone, hearing Kurt’s voice cheers Blaine up almost instantly.

“Kurt!” Blaine can’t help but tease him by mimicking his boyfriend’s surprised tone.

“Stop that,” Kurt says with a laugh, “I thought you were out with Tina? Or are you not going out until later tonight? I’m not interrupting, am I?”

“Hey, hey, slow down a little. You’re not interrupting anything.” Blaine hopes they can just leave it at that. He doesn’t want Kurt to feel bad about Blaine spending his birthday by himself, but he knows he couldn’t lie to Kurt if he asked.

“Oh, so you’re going out later then?”

Blaine’s pretty sure that his silence tells everything that Kurt needs to know. Judging by the sharp intake of breath he hears a few seconds later, his assumption would be correct.

“Oh Blaine…” The dismay in Kurt’s voice is heartbreaking.

“Mike’s in town.” Blaine says by way of an explanation. He doesn’t want Kurt to blame Tina; she’d done nothing wrong.

“You shouldn’t have to spend your birthday by yourself.” Kurt tries to argue.

“It’s okay, Kurt. You know I like spending time by myself. It gives me time to think.” He ignores the feeling in his stomach that tells him he really doesn’t want to be alone on today of all days.

“You’re not supposed to be alone on your birthday, Blaine. Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Well I am alone and there’s nothing I can do about it. So excuse me for trying to look at the bright side a little.” Blaine huffs.

There’s another beat of silence and suddenly Blaine feels awful for snapping.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap.” Blaine leaves the kitchen and slowly trudges up the stairs to his room. When he gets there he sees the frame on his bedside table with their prom photo and the note Kurt had left him, a wave of melancholy washes over him. “I really miss you.” Blaine sprawls across the bed as he speaks, wrapping his arms around the pillow that Kurt had always used when they spent the night together. It no longer smelt like him, the scent of Kurt’s shampoo and moisturizer had long since been replaces with the generic scent of laundry detergent, but just knowing that this pillow had been reserved for Kurt offered Blaine a little comfort.

“I miss you too.” Kurt’s response is quiet and Blaine almost doesn’t hear him, but it’s there.

“We’ve never gone this long without seeing each other.”

“Well there were a full sixteen years before we met so, yes we have.” Kurt laughs a little but there’s no spark, no life in his voice.

“You know what I mean.” Blaine tries to force a smile on his face before remembering that Kurt can’t see him and giving up all together, “Tina was so happy when she saw Mike. I didn’t want to feel jealous, I hate feeling jealous.” Blaine pauses to draw in a shaky breath “God Kurt, it hurt so much.”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“I had everything planned out. I was going to come down and meet you after school today. I booked a reservation at this gorgeous place in Columbus months ago; it was going to be perfect. Then I got this stupid paper for music history and I tried to rush through it but when I sent it to my TA, she said it wasn’t up to university standards. So I had to cancel everything and god Blaine, I’m so sorry. I should be there, I should have worked hard on my paper and made it back to Lima for the weekend.”

“You were going to come back?” A lump had formed in Blaine’s throat at Kurt’s words.

“Of course. Did you honestly think I would miss your 18th birthday?”

Yet again, Blaine lets his silence speak for him.

“Blaine, you are everything to me. I’m so sorry that I let this paper get between us this week but please don’t forget that.”

Blaine nods before remembering yet again that Kurt can’t see him. Kurt’s laughter rings through the phone, teasing Blaine about nodding and he can’t believe that he has this – that he has someone who was willing to travel 500 miles to be with him on his birthday, someone who knows him well enough to remember that Blaine always forgets he’s on the phone and answers questions in nonverbal manners.

“I want you to do something for me.” Kurt speaks again after a few moments of comfortable silence.

“Anything.”

“I’m going to hang up and you’re going to order a pizza that’s half pepperoni with extra mushrooms and half Hawaiian with extra pineapple even though you hate pineapple. I’m going to order one too even though I hate mushrooms. Then we’re going to go on skype and have a skype date with our shared pizza. I can’t be with you physically right now and this might not be the most glamorous of celebrations but I’m not going to let you sit mindlessly in front of the TV on your birthday.”

“I don’t want you to waste your night, Kurt. You should work on your paper.” Blaine insists weakly.

“Don’t you dare. My paper can wait, I have all weekend.” Kurt pauses for a moment, “Have you opened your gift from me yet?”

“Not yet. I was waiting until you said I could.” The package had arrived a week ago, but Kurt had sent specific instructions for Blaine to wait.

“Don’t open the gift yet, but open the note on top while you’re waiting for the pizza. Happy birthday, my love.” Blaine hears before the line goes dead.

He moves silently over to the desk when the package had been waiting for a week with a top taped to the top and opens the envelope with shaking hands.

I love you.
I loved you when you were 17, I love you when you’re 18, I’ll love you when you’re 80. I’ll love you when you’re beyond or anywhere in between.
Never forget that.

A smile spreads across Blaine’s face and his heart feels a little more full than it had this morning, He pulls out his phone and quickly shoots a text to Kurt.

How many days until you’re back for the summer?

201, I’ll be counting down the days.