Dec. 9, 2011, 3:14 p.m.
My Chemical Emotions: The First Time
E - Words: 2,741 - Last Updated: Dec 09, 2011 Story: Complete - Chapters: 7/7 - Created: Oct 31, 2011 - Updated: Dec 09, 2011 965 0 4 0 0
Kurt double checked the garage to make sure that Blaine’s parents were really gone, and that their cars weren’t in there. He also paced in front of the door, biting his nails before Blaine threw it open.
“You’re late, I was beginning to worry,” his voice rolled off the tongue like velvet. It only heightened Kurt’s anxiety. Was Blaine going to sound like that when they were naked in bed together?
Kurt tried to smile, but instead a nervous laugh passed through his lips.
Blaine went to Kurt, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. “Hey, are you alright?”
Kurt could tell that Blaine was shaking too. Kurt was so relieved he wasn’t the only one feeling the pressure. “Yeah, I’m just really…” Kurt trailed off.
Blaine nodded sympathetically. “I understand,” he said softly. “We can always back out if you want, just watch a movie and snuggle under some blankets.”
Kurt shook his head, swallowing the lump of nerves in his throat. “No, I really want to do this. I mean it’s silly, we’ve done basically everything except… that.. I just didn’t realize it was a big deal until the drive over.”
Blaine took Kurt’s face into his palms, looking deep into his eyes. “It is a big deal. This is our first time. We’re going to make love. It changes everything.”
Kurt swallowed again. “I hope nothing too drastic.”
Blaine smiled, rubbing his thumb across Kurt’s cheek bone. “It’ll be for the better. I want to be close to you Kurt, and show you I love you in every way.”
Kurt sighed, leaning in to press their foreheads together. They were like that for a few moments until Blaine dropped his arms, and took Kurt’s hand.
“C’mon, let’s go inside, it’s a bit chilly.”
Kurt hung his coat, wringing his clammy hands together. Blaine did make him feel a bit better, but his heart was still hammering against his rib cage with frightening force.
“Would you like to go upstairs?” Blaine asked. Kurt couldn’t find his voice, so he just nodded.
Blaine squeezed his hand and led him up the stairs, eyes never leaving each other. Kurt almost couldn’t feel his legs and feared he would trip and fall, ruining the big moment going on between them.
Kurt barely remembered walking down the hallway to Blaine’s room, but before he knew it, the door was closed behind them and Blaine sat Kurt on the bed. He leaned down and rubbed the tops of his thighs, kissing him lightly.
Kurt kissed him back until Blaine stood up, unbuttoning his shirt slowly. That was when Kurt snapped out of his haze.
“No!” He shrieked a little too loudly. Blaine stopped looking shocked and hurt. “No, I mean, allow me.” Blaine’s face immediately softened.
Kurt stood up and undid the rest of Blaine’s buttons, pushing his shirt smoothly over his shoulders. Blaine was looking at Kurt the whole time, who was tracing the contours of Blaine’s chest with his finger, Kurt’s eyelashes fanned across his cheeks, and a faint blush dusting his ears and neck.
“You’re so beautiful,” Kurt murmured in awe. “Have I told you that yet?”
“No, you are beautiful, Kurt,” Blaine insisted, reaching for the hem of Kurt’s shirt. He lifted his arms, and Blaine pulled it over his head, mussing up Kurt’s hair.
Their naked chests touched as they kissed each other passionately, hands in each other’s hair. Kurt walked backward until the backs of his knees hit the bed, and Blaine fell on top of him, not breaking the kiss.
Blaine pulled back. “I can’t believe we’re finally doing this.” He brushed back Kurt’s hair, his bangs falling into his eyes.
Kurt breathed in shakily. “I know,” he let out. “I love you so much, Blaine.”
Blaine’s hazel eyes shined with emotion. “I love you too, Kurt. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be than right here with you.”
Kurt leaned up and captured Blaine’s lips once more, hands running over the muscular contours of Blaine’s back. He grasped Blaine’s ass, and ground up into him experimentally.
Blaine groaned into Kurt’s mouth, and Kurt took the opportunity to slide is tongue in. Blaine kissed back with much intensity before he pulled back, panting.
“Why are we still wearing pants?”
Kurt giggled. “I don’t know.”
Blaine leaned up, unbuttoning Kurt’s jeans, and with some difficulty and assistance, pulled them down and off. Blaine eyed Kurt’s freed erection bouncing against his stomach with wide eyes.
“You.. you aren’t.. weren’t wearing any underwear.”
“Yes sweety, I went commando for our special occasion,” Kurt coddled.
“Why didn’t I think of that,” Blaine smiled dopily, a thoughtful tone to his voice. “Screw underwear!” In one swift motion Blaine pulled off his pants with his briefs all at once.
Kurt eyed him hungrily, making grabbing hands. In his opinion, Blaine was absolutely flawless naked, and Kurt wanted be all over him NOW.
Blaine crawled on top of Kurt, tangling their legs together and leaning in for a kiss once more. Kurt sighed, pulling Blaine flush against him. There was nothing more exhilarating and wonderful than the sensation of naked skin on skin contact.
Their bodies slid together, dicks brushing together ever few seconds or so, shooting sparks of pleasure through their bodies, setting their nerves on fire.
Blaine kissed down Kurt’s pale neck, scraping his teeth, and trying not to make a bruise. Kurt moaned softly, fingertips stroking Blaine’s shoulders in random patterns. Blaine shivered.
“Kurt, I want you so bad, oh my god,” he murmured against Kurt’s flesh.
“I know, me too,” Kurt whined, jerking his hips into Blaine’s, desperate for more contact.
Blaine responded by grinding down, groaning in his throat. It was so just so sensitive and intense, and fuck.
Despite being ridiculously aroused, Kurt felt the nerves settle in once more. “So how do you want to do this?”
Blaine mouthed at Kurt’s chest for a minute before answering. “I’m not sure, I want to do everything with you, Kurt.”
Kurt laughed nervously. “Well we have all the time in the world for everything… we need to take one step at a time, though. What’s your biggest fantasy?”
Blaine licked a stripe down Kurt’s clenching stomach, biting at his hip. He inched closer to Kurt’s cock, nipping teasingly at his thighs.
“Mmm.. I’ve been wanting you in my mouth for a while now, since we haven’t done that yet.”
A tremor rolled through Kurt at the thought. “Oh… kay, just don’t finish me off, we.. we still.. sex,” Kurt rambled until he sucked in a harsh breath because Blaine had sucked the head of his dick into his mouth.
Blaine grabbed Kurt’s shaft firmly, sliding his tongue through the slit, tasting the pre-come there. Blaine hummed around Kurt.
“You taste so good,” He said before sinking down as far as he could go. He sucked up, hallowing out his cheeks, and teasing the underside of the head. Kurt fisted Blaine’s hair, writhing in the sheets, trying not jerk his hips up into the tight, wet heat.
Blaine was impossibly aroused, making Kurt undone like this. Blaine reached down between the bed and himself, sliding his fingers past his testicles to his hole, rubbing circles there. Blaine moaned around Kurt again, rutting into the sheets.
Blaine pulled off with an obscene slurp. “Kurt.. I want you inside of me, please,” he begged, his voice completely wrecked.
Kurt looked down to see Blaine fingering himself, his mouth red and swollen, causing Kurt’s heart to shoot up his throat. It was the single hottest thing he had seen in his entire life.
“Yes, of course, oh my god Blaine, get over here,” Kurt’s voice was drowned by desperation, and Blaine wasted no time in locking their lips together once more for a headed kiss that was all teeth and tongue.
Kurt broke from Blaine after the longest time, breathing raggedly. “Lube?”
Blaine got up on his arm, leaning over Kurt and digging through his nightstand, grabbing an unopened bottle of lube.
“I got this just for us,” Blaine informed before closing his eyes because Kurt was sucking at his neck. “Guhhmmg…”
“Aw, thats cute. Squirt some onto my fingers,” Kurt whispered, voice still shaky.
Blaine obliged, scooting forward and up slightly, straddling so Kurt could have easy access to his ass.
Oh my god I can’t believe this is happening. Blaine shivered when Kurt’s cold fingers dragged over his testicles before teasing his entrance.
“Is it okay?” Kurt asked hesitantly, looking up at Blaine. Blaine nodded. “More than okay.”
Kurt circled his hole before slipping one finger in up to the first knuckle, past the first ring of muscles.
“Do you do this to yourself often?” Kurt chanced at asking.
Blaine closed his eyes and nodded, feeling Kurt’s finger sink in deeper, gliding in and out, working him open.
“Yeah, only when I’m thinking about you,” Blaine whispered, then shuddered because Kurt slipped another finger in, scissoring slightly.
Kurt watched Blaine’s every reaction, relishing in the excitement of actually being inside Blaine for the first time. The feeling was indescribable, and this intimacy almost made Kurt’s nerves dissipate. Almost.
“More,” Blaine grunted, and Kurt obliged, pushing a third finger in, gently moving in and out. Blaine’s mouth fell open as he moaned obscenely, no holding back. Kurt felt his cock harden even more, if it was possible at the glorious sight. Kurt couldn’t believe it. Blaine was pushing his hips backward, trying to fuck himself down on Kurt’s fingers.
“Oh my god Blaine,” Kurt whined. “I love seeing you like this.”
Blaine opened his big hazel eyes and gazed at Kurt, his eyes shining with lust and need. “Kurt I need you in me right now. You’re going to fill me up and, oh my god…”
Kurt withdrew his fingers, and Blaine whined at the loss. Kurt grabbed the slippery bottle, squirting a hearty portion into his palm before lathering himself up.
Shaking with anticipation, Blaine squeezed the sides of Kurt’s hips with his legs and he sat up, lining Kurt’s lubed dick to his entrance.
“You’re going to make love to me,” he stated like he needed to explain. Kurt couldn’t tell if he thought it was cute or distracted by the fact he was centimeters away from being inside Blaine, making them one.
Kurt watched as Blaine stared meaningful into Kurt’s eyes, setting his face in preparation. Kurt nodded frantic encouragement, his heart slamming against his chest again. This was the moment of truth.
Kurt threw his head back and groaned when he felt the tip of his cock breach Blaine’s ass. Holy shit. They were no longer virgins. This realization and the intense sensations made Kurt’s mouth drop open in ecstasy.
Blaine was sweating as he sunk down agonizingly slow. His chest was flushed and his hair was damp. Beads of sweat rolled deliciously down his throat. Kurt kept his hips still, not wanting to hurt Blaine.
Once Kurt was completely sheathed inside, Blaine’s legs relaxed slightly. Blaine leaned forward and kissed Kurt sloppily, getting into a more comfortable position, chest flush against Kurt’s.
Kurt pet at his sides. “You okay, baby?”
“Yes, just give me a minute.” Blaine said haltingly, forehead creased.
“Does it hurt?” Kurt asked in a small, worried voice.
“A little,” Blaine admitted. “It feels so good though, too. I just need to get used to it, you’re so big…”
Kurt blushed furiously but said, “Take all the time you need.”
They were still for a few moments, just breathing, until Blaine said, “Move.”
Using Blaine’s hipbones as leverage, Kurt pulled out slowly, all the way to the tip, before thrusting back in.
Blaine grunted. “Yes, Kurt.”
Kurt rolled hips up into Blaine, trying to get as deep as possible. God, it felt so good. More than Kurt could even describe to himself. It was everything he thought it would be and more. The sound of their skin slapping together made Kurt want to roll his eyes into the back of his head, it was so intoxicating.
Blaine sat up, hands splayed across Kurt’s chest and thighs clenching with each thrust. With this new angle, Kurt realized he was basically holding Blaine up with his own strength. Kurt gave a particular rough thrust.
“Oh,” Blaine exclaimed, throwing his head back, veins in his strong neck sticking out. Kurt couldn’t stop staring. Blaine had lost all reservations. His gel was completely washed out, his body was covered in a thick sheen of sweat. Each time Kurt pushed in sharply, Blaine’s mouth would fall open and Kurt felt himself nearly salivating. However, he was getting close and he wanted to try something else.
Kurt slowed his movements, sliding smoothly in and out of Blaine. He closed his eyes for a moment enjoying the gorgeous sensation.
Blaine whined. “Don’t slow down, Kurt.”
“Do you want to.. wanna try-?”
“Try what?” Blaine asked breathlessly.
“Taking control. Like ride me.”
Blaine’s eyebrows shot up, but is eyes darkened. Kurt could tell he liked the idea of that. Blaine nodded, and Kurt removed his death grip from Blaine’s hips, giving him free reign.
Blaine braced his knees against the bed, lifting up one of Kurt’s legs and grabbing his thigh for leverage. “Alright.. okay,” he mumbled to himself. Kurt saw his thigh muscles clench as he slid up and down Kurt’s length a few times experimentally. Blaine cried out.
“You alright?” Kurt asked startled.
“Yes, sorry, it was just so intense,” Blaine explained, breathing raggedly. “I think I hit my prostate.”
Kurt rubbed his leg soothingly, and Blaine started to pick up a good pace. Kurt had to clutch at him, but his skin was so sweaty he settled for fisting the sheets until his knuckles were white.
Kurt watched, wide-eyed as Blaine moaned brokenly above him, eyes closed, his gorgeous, thick black eyelashes fluttering as he pounded himself down onto Kurt. Every sound Blaine was making would send jolts of excitement up Kurt’s spine.
Blaine was so gentlemanly, dapper and put together in public, so seeing him in the dim light of the bedroom moaning pleasurably and loudly, obscenities tumbling out of his mouth made Kurt endlessly thrilled.
After a couple of minutes, Blaine felt like his knees were burning form exertion, but he kept up his quick pace, feeling the heat coil at the base of his spine.
“Kurt, I’m close, please touch me,” he begged.
“I’ve got you,” Kurt whimpered as he grabbed Blaine’s cock, pumping quickly along with each thrust. Kurt felt his lower abdomen burning with pressure, and he knew he was close too.
“Come for me, Blaine.”
And seconds later Blaine obliged, his hips stuttered as he came all over Kurt’s fist and chest, shrieking Kurt’s name. It was the single most pornographic, yet beautiful sight Kurt had ever seen, and feeling Blaine clench around him made him topple over the edge too.
Kurt let out a long high pitched whine, thrashing his arms as he shuddered through his orgasm. White stars exploded in front of his eyes, but he still didn’t want to look away from Blaine who was now becoming limp with fatigue. He dropped Kurt’s leg and leaned forward, licking his own come off Kurt’s chest.
Kurt one-upped him but licking his hand clean. He hummed in his throat. “Blaine, you taste amazing.”
Blaine collapsed on Kurt’s chest, with Kurt still inside him, their sweat and semen sliding in between them. “Oh, Kurt,” Blaine sighed, voice brimming with strong emotions.
It took Kurt a minute to come down from his post-orgasm haze and realize that Blaine was crying, his warm tears sliding down his cheeks and onto Kurt’s neck.
“Oh, baby are you okay?” Kurt whispered, stroking his hair affectionately.
“Yeah,” Blaine sniffled. “I just love you so much. That was so beautiful.”
Kurt felt his eyes prickle, utterly moved that Blaine was feeling so much about this.
“It was,” Kurt agreed, his voice cracking. “I feel so closer to you now more than ever, Blaine. I’m just so happy.”
Kut started to cry, and Blaine kissed him softly, tasting the salty tears. “You are my whole world, Kurt. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Kurt pulled Blaine into a tight embrace, burying his face into his neck. Kurt was so overcome with emotions, he wasn’t able to speak. Blaine and him had discussed future plans in New York, but never talked about the long term in that sense. Kurt felt wholly and utterly complete. Blaine clutched him back, emotions just as fierce and powerful.
They held each other for a while, kissed occasionally and let their tears fall. It was the true definition of making love, and Kurt doubted that any other time would measure up to this. These two boys were in love, and it was forever. They knew deep down that it was the truth.
Comments
Well, I made the mistake of starting to read this when I'd gone to bed very tired, so I started to fall asleep right in the middle of the lovemaking. Talk about buzzkill! My brain was being Finn in the last chapter!I finally got to read the chapter as a whole today, though. Ohhhh, how very beautiful. You wrote it so well that the word hot didn't even cross my mind the entire time I was reading it. The only words that did were "sweet," "awwwww," "beautiful," and "love." Oh, and in a couple of places, "Wow, I wish I could write like this (speaking of the smooth flow)."I think your portrayal of their first time is probably a lot more realistic than any of mine; I really have no idea what it's like for teenage boys. I have a guy I can ask questions about what certain things feel like during sex, but he is 100% straight and gets all squirmy whenever I talk about gay sex. He doesn't even want to experiment with me trying to find his prostate. He says, "My asshole is a one-way tunnel." So, I can't ask him about first-time experiences for gay couples.There's the resource justusboys.com, but the admins have pretty much told me not to ask, just to read the posts the former virgins made and ask them questions. I don't really like that.... Maybe if I ask a specific question? Because all the posts I see on there are all impersonal-sounding, like, "I popped my cherry," etc.; none say they lost it to someone they loved.There are lots of female members there openly who are there for support, research, or both, so it's perfectly acceptable for us to ask questions...but the admins are pretty strict about people being offensive or starting fights. Since I have a social disorder, I run everything by them before I post it.Oh, justusboys.com also has a porn site with both photos and videos. I use the videos for research, too. :) They're less than 5 minutes long unless you pay for a membership at the site each one is from, but one of the categories is "twinks," which fits our boys. :) There's one site that has the bottom sucking on a lollipop while getting fucked *rolls eyes*, but one of their vids is so perfect (other than the lollipop) that I saved the URL and go back to it a lot. I have about 3 of their video URLs saved for reference. I'll probably collect more in the future, but I haven't visited them in a while.Did you notice I rec'd this fic to people on tumblr? Even though I'm not finished with it, I know it's awesome.
It's okay I've fallen asleep reading porn before, so don't feel too bad! haha, but seriously thank you. I really tried to capture their love at the same time making the porn really hot. I don't know what it's like for two guys to have sex either obviously, but I have a lot of gay friends that have no shame in telling me about their sex life and experiences, so they have definitely helped and inspired me in a lot of aspects, which is really great! And you did rec this?? I don't know your URL so if I did I can go see. Seriously, you're really sweet. I really really appreciate our long reviews. They were amazing.
Damn.Ummmm, please add a warning for barebacking. That's a major "not gonna read it" for me, and there are others out there who feel the same way. Thanks.Just because they're virgins doesn't mean they can't get STDs.
um... you can't get an STD if you're a virgin, it's only possible in severely abnormal circumstances