Dear Mr. Anderson-

I am contacting you with regards to the upcoming weekend. I feel as though I have been remiss in properly courting you. It is my hope that you would be interested in some type of consort this Saturday evening. I am woefully busy this week, or I would try to set something up sooner. I’m sorry to tell you I won’t even be available for our regularly scheduled piano lesson tomorrow due to an unavoidable meeting with my advisor.

In any event, the activity will be determined by me, but you will get a final say in the plan. As soon as I come up with a plan.

Sincerely,
Mr. Kurt Hummel

PS Insert blushing font.

~~~~~

To: k.hummel@nyu.edu
From: b.anderson6@nyu.edu
Date: Tues, Sept 23, 2:03 pm
Subject: Re: Courting

Dear Mr. Hummel

Insert following fonts:

blushing
I DON’T KNOW HOW I’M GOING TO WAIT UNTIL SATURDAY
giggling
I FEEL REALLY SILLY THAT I’M THIS EXCITED
smiling
dancing
happiness

End font inserts.

Please take me on a date. I honestly don’t care where we go.

Yours truly,
Dr. Blaine Anderson, DDM

PS I have no idea why I’m impersonating a dentist. I just wanted some letters after my name.

~~~~~

To: Blaine, From: Kurt
Date: Tues, Sept 23, 2:08 pm
Subject: Re: Courting

But why a dentist?

~~~~~

To: Blaine, From: Kurt
Date: Tues, Sept 23, 2:17 pm
Subject: Re: Courting

Why NOT a dentist???

HMMM???

I totally win this round.

~~~~~

September 23rd
@ 10:48 pm
Kurt: How do you feel about carnivals?

10:49 pm
Blaine: I like them? I guess? How much information do you want/need?

10:52 pm
Kurt: I mostly just wanted to make sure you don’t hate them.

10:53 pm
Blaine: Nope don’t hate them. Although I guess this isn’t the text where you ask me to run away and become a carny with you. I’ll just have to keep waiting for that one.

10:54 pm
Kurt: We could be carnies. That might be fun. Maybe we could have some type of dog training act. Poodles. Top hats.
Kurt: RINGS OF FIRE.
Kurt: How do you do that? Make me go off on weird tangents like that?
Kurt: ANYWAY. Would you like to go to one on Saturday? I keep seeing signs and I’m a bit of a carnival ride junky.
Kurt: Tilt-a-whirl, Scrambler, etc.

10:55 pm
Blaine: I could be down with that
Blaine: Sounds fun!

----------

To: Kurt, From: Blaine
Date: Wed, Sept 24, 4:17 pm
Subject: but what if...

We could breed and raise the poodles ourselves! And train them. I’ll start researching this.

But I’m kind of afraid of fire, so maybe we can just use hula hoops?

~~~~~

To: Blaine, From: Kurt
Date: Wed, Sept 24, 8:01 pm
Subject: Re: but what if...

We could breed and raise the poodles. But I don’t know much about poodle raising either. Or dog training in general.

What about the top hats though? We should wear top hats, obviously, but how does one convince a poodle (that will undoubtedly be poorly trained since we’re both completely uneducated in dog training) to wear a top hat? Maybe they don’t need top hats?

Don’t worry about the ring of fire. I’ll take care of that part. You won’t have to go anywhere near it. We could use hula hoops if you’re really that afraid, though I worry that might be anticlimactic for our audience.

~~~~~

To: Kurt, From: Blaine
Date: Wed, Sept 24, 10:29 pm
Subject: Re: but what if...

Really, Kurt? You don’t see the solution to the top hat conundrum? That’s what elastic is made for! Seriously, I’m pretty sure elastic was invented for the sole purpose of securing top hats to poodles. They’re going to look so cute! And they’ll be well trained. I’ve had a lot of time on my hands this week to study both poodle breeding and training.

I’m a little afraid of the ring of fire still, but as long as you’ll protect me, I’ll be fine. :)

~~~~~

To: Blaine, From: Kurt
Date: Thurs, Sept 25, 12:54 am
Subject: Re: but what if...

You make me smile even after the longest day in the world. I literally just got home from a group project meeting and I wanted to kill everyone there. I have no idea why professors assign things like this. I don’t want to collaborate! I just want to go to sleeeeeep.

I’ve never heard of “elastic.” Tell me more, sounds fascinating.

I’ll always protect you, Blaine.

~~~~~

To: Kurt, From: Blaine
Date: Thurs, Sept 25, 12:08 pm
Subject: Re: but what if...

You make me smile too Kurt.

I hate group projects. I just feel sort of useless in them. I actually haven’t had to do any in college, but I had a teacher in high school who was addicted to group work and it was AWFUL. Torturous for everyone involved.

And sarcasm, how shocking coming from you.

(blushing font) Thank you for protecting me. (end blushing font)

----------

September 25th
11:01 pm
Kurt: but what if the poodles also had capes

11:54 pm
Blaine: OMG. That would be adorable.

~~~~~

September 26th
12:02 pm
Kurt: Today is round three of the longest day on earth.
Kurt: work, class, Teen Vogue office party
Kurt: I’m looking forward to the party part
Kurt: but it’s just going to take foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

12:08 pm
Blaine: You can do it!
Blaine: Just remember that tomorrow we’re going to become carnies!

12:13 pm
Kurt: Blaine. I hate to break the news to you like this.
Kurt: But we’re not going to become carnies tomorrow.
Kurt: Our application was rejected by the Carnies of America.

12:16 pm
Blaine: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh nooooooooooooooooooo!
Blaine: I’m so sad.
Blaine: why did you get my hopes up!!!???

12:21 pm
Kurt: They were my hopes too!
Kurt: hopes dashed. sadness for everyone involved.
Kurt: but we can still go to the carnival!

12:35 pm
Blaine: Alright. Fine.
Blaine: If we’re not actually going to become carnies, I could just attend a carnival
Blaine: And try to be satisfied.

~~~~~

September 27th
1:02 am
Blaine: what the hell am I going to do with all of this poodle sperm I bought on the internet?

11:33 am
Kurt: Did you drunk text me about poodle sperm last night?

11:37 am
Blaine: Blaine no en casa.
Blaine: Poodle sperm es muy viejo y loco.
Blaine: (in case you can’t tell, I don’t actually speak Spanish.)

11:41 am
Kurt: well that’s good, because if you bought very old and crazy poodle sperm on the internet I would highly recommend you return it.
Kurt: I’ll see you at 6!

11:53 am
Blaine: also, the answer is yes.
Blaine: I did drunk text you about poodle sperm last night.

12:33 pm
Kurt: I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen a drunk text without typos.

1:01pm
Blaine: Thank you. I’ll add that to my resume.
Blaine: “Can compose drunk texts without any typos.”

1:03 pm
Kurt: I think that would be a particularly good skill for a teacher.

6:01 pm
Kurt: Here!

6:03 pm
Blaine: Leaving my room now.
Blaine: You should know that at some point during this afternoon I fell into a serious state of ennui.
Blaine: Everything else in my life seems bleak now compared to the broken promise of poodles and top hats and rings of fire.

6:04 pm
Kurt: It’s gonna be ok, little buddy. We’ll help each other through it.

~~~~~

Kurt’s waiting outside Blaine’s building as Blaine comes out the door.

“I’m nah-not little,” Blaine pouts in greeting.

“I know. It’s just a term of endearment.”

“I’m almost average. Just th-th-this ssside of average.” Blaine is nodding vigorously to underscore this. “If we l-l-lived in Argentina or Turkey I w-would bbbe exactly average.”

“Good to know, perhaps someday you can relocate internationally to live amongst your smaller statured brethren.” Kurt gives Blaine’s back a quick rub at they start walking down the street.

“You look very nice this evening,” Kurt says as he takes in Blaine’s light blue button down shirt, sleeves rolled neatly, dark jeans and often present boat shoes.

“Th-thank you, as you dah-dddo you,” Blaine replies courteously. Kurt took his look down a notch for carnival rides and is wearing well fitted jeans with a striped three quarter sleeved t-shirt.

“I kind of keep meaning to ask you something. But I don’t want to make you feel weird,” Kurt says as the boys move out of the way of other pedestrians. “So I figured I’d just get it out of the way at the beginning of our first official date.”

“I-I-I almost always ffffeel kind of ww-ww-weird,” Blaine says with a smirk.

“Are you ok, with like, being out? I mean, you really just started telling people you were gay and I just don’t want to do anything that might make you feel uncomfortable in public.”

“Oh! Oh God, no! I-I-I’m nn-nah-not uncomfortable about … that at all,” Blaine says.

“About ‘that’” Kurt finger quotes.

Blaine rolls his eyes. “I was, was, was trying to avoid a b-word. I was just trying not to sssstutter. I’m nnn-not uncomfortable about bb-bb-bbbbb-be-be-being out. Ok? Not uncomfortable.”

“Alright, alright, I believe you,” Kurt says as they start to walk. “So it’s ok if I do this?” He asks as he takes Blaine’s hand.

“Yes. I-I-I like that,” Blaine ducks his head. “Mmmmmakes me … happy.”

“I’m feeling whimsical. How do you feel about ice cream for dinner?” Kurt asks.

“I’m nah-not opposed to wh-wh-whimsy.”

“This new place just opened and everyone at work won’t shut up about it. I mean, we could wait and get whatever at the carnival, but I really want ice cream all of a sudden.”

“I heard we, we, we could do bb-bah-bah-both ice cream AND carnival f-food.”

“Blaine, you are a genius,” Kurt says.

Blaine starts whistling quietly while they walk. Kurt can’t help but stare at his lips.

Suddenly he finds himself saying “I’ve been thinking that at some point in the future I’d like to kiss you. But if you’re not ok with that, just let me know. I don’t want to make you tense or nervous or anything. It doesn’t have to be tonight, but I was thinking sometime soon. I just thought I’d put it out there. For you and the universe. Just letting you know that it’s in the works. I’m hatching a plan. Just so you know. Now I’m rambling.”

Blaine whistles a few happy notes, smiles and squeezes Kurt’s hand a little tighter, hoping that Kurt understands that to be the “all clear for kissage” signal that he means it to be.

The boys arrive at the ice cream shop and it’s crowded and noisy, which is really the only way ice cream shops should be on glorious late September evenings. Blaine orders a simple vanilla cone and Kurt is aghast, “No sprinkles even? No chocolate dip? What is this madness?”

Blaine laughs and turns back to the girl at the counter and says “Wwwwith chocolate sp-sp-sprinkles, please.” One of the best parts of spending time with Kurt is that he really doesn’t seem to mind when Blaine stutters.

He’s noticed time and again, particularly with his father, people don’t seem to know where to look when Blaine stutters while ordering in a restaurant or talking to a counter person. These are normal events for Blaine and he doesn’t let it phase him (unless it’s really bad, like the coffee ordering incident from last month), mostly he just wants to get it over with. But when his dad is there, he averts his gaze and generally just acts weird, sometimes wandering away altogether, which makes things that much harder for Blaine.

But Kurt doesn’t look away. Just now, when Blaine stuttered while ordering, Kurt didn’t look away. When Blaine shot a sideways glance at him, he was surprised to find Kurt looking at him, not worried or concerned, but sort of fondly.

As they walk out of the ice cream shop, Kurt locates a bench for them to sit on, telling Blaine “It’s too hard to walk and eat a chocolate sundae.”

They’re quiet for a moment and suddenly Blaine spews forth “I’m nah-not wah-wah-worried about kissing. It’s one of the things mmmmmy mah-mah-mouth is good at!” He then face palms because it’s pretty much the dorkiest (and weirdly sexual) things he could have possibly said at the moment. He also said it much too loudly.

“Jeez, was that a proposition, Blaine?” Kurt giggles. Kurt actually giggles. And blushes. Blaine just made Kurt giggle and blush.

“You’re bah-bah-blah-blushing like a sssssschoolgirl Kurt.”

“It happens to the best of us Blaine. You’re not exactly pasty at the moment either. I would call you a decidedly attractive shade of crimson.”

They eat their ice cream in silence for a few minutes after that. It’s not a bad silence, although it’s not quite a comfortable silence, as each of them considers and weighs their options.

Kurt really doesn’t want to overwhelm Blaine tonight, and he’s pretty sure he’ll just kiss him goodnight.

Blaine is in a heavy debate with himself about just manning up and kissing Kurt right here on this very bench.

When they finish the last of their ice cream, they wander the streets until they catch the scent of popcorn and cotton candy. They make their way onto the crowded lot and Kurt is soon in line getting them tickets for some rides. Blaine thinks Kurt’s enthusiasm for carnival rides is really quite endearing, to steal one of Kurt’s favorite adjectives.

They take a ride on the Scrambler, careening into each other as the ride rotates. It’s fun and awkward and exhilarating. Pretty much exactly what they needed to ease whatever tension might have been left between them. They disembark the ride laughing and dizzily bumping into each other.

“Alright, your choice now. What’s next?”

“Ummm,” Blaine inhales deeply. The sun has dipped below the horizon and he knows the best (also, most romantic) place to be right now would be the ferris wheel. F’s don’t seem to be working at the moment though, so instead he tips his chin in the direction of the ride.

“Uggggggghhhh, the ferris wheel?” Kurt laments.

“Afraid of heights?” No blocks, no false starts, it’s Blaine’s best sentence of the day. Though it’s really just a fragment, says the small loser voice. Oh shut the fuck up, says a new confident voice. Blaine briefly worries that he has multiple personalities.

“I don’t mind heights, but I do fear falling to my death from a ride constructed by non-union day laborers with a vendetta against their foreman.”

“You l-l-l-l-lead a rah-rrrich inner life. You lllike the other rrrr-rides.”

“It’s always so creaky at the top! But alas, it’s your choice, so we’ll go on the dumb ferris wheel.” Kurt says it begrudgingly, but Blaine has a feeling he really doesn’t mind. They stand in line for about 15 minutes as the other riders load and unload. They finally get locked into a car and go right to the top. Where the ride stops, because a woman lost her shoe getting on and a child is currently having a tantrum because he doesn’t want to get off.

“And of course, we’re stuck at the top while a brouhaha occurs below.”

“Just rr-rr-relax,” Blaine says.

“Yeah, right,” Kurt can’t stop glancing around and startling at every little creak or sound the ride makes.

“I-I-I could ppp-ppp-protect you,” Blaine says glancing at Kurt through his eyelashes.

“Oh really? How do you propose to do that?”

Blaine gestures for Kurt to lean back in the car and then he puts his arm around him. He tightens his arm around Kurt’s shoulders and Kurt can’t help but snuggle into Blaine’s side.

And does suddenly feel a little safer.

~~~~~

A moment of Kurt

As I watch him look out into the distance, I can’t help but think that he’s everything hopeful and innocent and beautiful in this world.

I’m awfully lucky to have found him.

~~~~~

A moment of Blaine

Fuck this. I’m kissing him.

~~~~~

So Blaine does kiss Kurt.

It’s long and deep and Blaine pours all of his feelings into it.

Needless to say, Kurt forgets to be scared.

About ten minutes later, as they step off the ride, Kurt realizes Blaine hasn’t said anything since before they kissed. Kurt grabs Blaine’s arm and pulls him out of the way of the other disembarking passengers. “Hey, are you ok?”

Three blinks, nod, lip twitch, shy smile.

“You’re quite proud of yourself aren’t you?”

Three blinks, nod, lip twitch, shit-eating grin.

“Good God, you’re adorable.”

Blaine laughs loudly as Kurt pulls him in for another kiss.

~~~~~

September 28th
@ 12:06 am

Kurt: What are you doing online?

Blaine: I didn’t realize I was signed in
I was just checking late, late movie times for Matt
He’s trying to “woo” a girl in our dorm

Kurt: how’s that going for him?
I’ve been trying to woo someone myself lately
Perhaps I could get some pointers from Matt

Blaine: I can tell you with confidence that your wooing techniques are top notch
What are you doing online?

I thought you were going to meet up with some peeps

Kurt: I was and then they decided to just stay home (Rachel) and come over (Puck)

Blaine: ah ok.

I had fun tonight

Kurt: me too

you could come over

Rachel doesn't bite

Blaine: LOL

I know

I just don't want to be too clingy

Scare you off or something

Kurt: I don't see that being a problem

sigh

I have to tell you something

Blaine: oh god, I'm already too clingy?

Kurt: no Blaine.

Heel.

Blaine: did you just give me a dog command?

Kurt: yes. sorry.

Blaine: s'ok

I think I needed it

Kurt: I got into the study abroad program

for next semester, in Paris

I've always really wanted to go
and I applied before you were ... anything
And I just found out when I got today’s mail

Blaine: oh...

THAT'S AWESOME!

I totally get it
I’ll miss you

and it will put a damper on our burgeoning relationship

Kurt: did you really just use the word burgeoning?

Blaine: yes, yes i did.
and now so did you! :D

I’m probably going to have to start clinging now

Kurt: do you want to come over?

Blaine: only if you promise to protect me from Rachel’s boyfriend.

Kurt: of course. :)

Blaine: see you in 20.

Kurt: wait one sec
I thought you and Puck were “bros”

Blaine: did he say that!?
I mean
(cool guy font) yeah we are totally bros (end cool guy font)

But um, he still scares the shit out of me.