March 15, 2015, 7 p.m.
Say Something: Words of Wisdom
E - Words: 1,707 - Last Updated: Mar 15, 2015 Story: Complete - Chapters: 22/? - Created: Oct 19, 2014 - Updated: Oct 19, 2014 130 0 0 0 0
Things are looking up for the boys. I wouldnt say its smooth sailing from here on in, but they are definitely headed in the right direction. All Kurt needs is a little push...
Kurt woke up Christmas morning with a smile on his face for the first time in a long time. His conversation with Blaine last night had been amazing. They talked for what felt like hours and Kurt had never felt closer to Blaine, even though they were miles apart.
Kurt spent the rest of the morning with his family, opening gifts and just being together. He and Carole migrated into the kitchen after the cleanup was finished, while Finn and Burt turned on football.
Spending time cooking with Carole was one of his favorite pastimes. Through the years, the two had developed a rhythm in the kitchen. Each had their areas of expertise and they moved around each other like a choreographed routine, so within an hour everything was finished, and the two sat at the table, each with a cup of coffee.
"So Kurt, you seem especially happy this morning." Carole said, looking at her step son with a knowing smile. Shed gotten up in the middle of the night to take Burts gift downstairs and had heard Kurt apparently talking on the phone. His teasing tone and giggles were something shed not heard from him before, and she realized he was talking to a boy.
Kurts cheeks turned pink and he looked down at his coffee, which was suddenly very interesting. "Im just happy to be home with you guys." He responded.
"Oh, I know you are, sweetie, but you seem different this morning. Even happier. Is there something you want to share?" She asked gently.
He rubbed the rim of his cup with his finger absently. He looked up at her with a shy smile and glanced back over his shoulder toward the living room before returning his gaze to her.
"Do you remember Blaine?" He asked hesitantly.
"Your friend from college? Yes. What about him?" She smiled, not making it easy for him.
He grinned then. "I asked him out on a date and he said yes."
"Thats wonderful sweetheart. So, has this date happened yet?"
"No, well, he sort of made me dinner the other day, but we didnt talk about it being a date." He looked up then and saw the knowing look on Caroles face. "Oh God, that was, like, a date, wasnt it? Oh wow. We didnt really discuss what it was or what it meant, he just cooked. And now I..."
Carole reached over and put her hand over his on the table. "Youre rambling. So, he fixed you dinner and you didnt consider it a date?"
"Its complicated." He said, sighing.
"How?"
"Lets just say weve been through a lot these past couple of weeks. He...well, ugh. Its hard to explain." He put his head down on the table in defeat.
"Hey now, you were so excited just a minute ago. Hold on to that. No matter what has happened in the past. Use that as a lesson and move forward." She waited until he looked up at her. "Do you like him?" She asked gently.
He smiled wistfully and nodded. "I think I might love him." He said quietly. "Weve just had so many issues in the past, Im not sure if I can open myself up again." Even after his confession to Blaine that he wanted to move on, he still had lingering doubts.
"Oh honey, love is tricky, but what I said before applies even more now. If you love him and want to have a relationship with him, its important you dont allow the past decide your future." She paused for a moment, wondering if she should continue. "Look, I dont know the whole story, but I do know there have been times youve been hurt by him. I also know he makes you happy. You light up when you are talking about him. Even when hes hurt you, theres still a look you get when his name has been mentioned. Now I dont need to know what happened, but I get the feeling there is a lot more to the story than meets the eye, am I right?"
He nodded, but didnt speak, so she continued. "Out of the handful of times Ive met him, he seemed like a real genuine guy. Like I said, I dont know the full story, but I think that as happy as he seems to make you, it would be worth the risk to open your heart. Just remember to learn from the past, but dont let it control your future. You deserve to be happy."
He looked at her from across the table with tears in his eyes. He was never more grateful for her than in this moment. He knew, without a doubt, that his mom would have said the same thing, and it warmed his heart. He slowly got up from his seat and moved in to envelop her in a hug.
After his talk with Carole, his mood improved even more. He felt lighter. He was through worrying about the past. He wanted to move on, and he wanted to do it with Blaine. He couldnt wait to talk to him again.
The rest of the day passed in a blur. There was Christmas dinner, then appetizers and a Christmas sing a long with Rachel and her dads. It was one of the best Christmass Kurt ever had.
Rachel noticed the change in him and kept watching him throughout the night. He could tell she wanted to corner him and find out what was up, but he was thoroughly avoiding her. Not that he didnt want to tell her, but he wanted to enjoy the family time for now.
At one point, Rachel excused herself to take a phone call, which Kurt found odd, but tried not to think too much about it. It was probably just someone from ND calling to confirm their plans the next day. Funny thing was, after her phone call, she stopped trying to corner him and just watched him with an amused smile.
As they were saying their goodbyes, Rachel finally approached Kurt and he tensed, waiting for the questions, but she surprised him by pulling him in for a hug. He looked at her, confused, then she spoke. "Hey, how about you and I have lunch tomorrow? Breadsticks at 1:00?"
Now he was even more confused. "Why?"
She smiled and explained, "Even though we live together, I feel like we dont see each other enough. And being here, back home, I thought itd be nice to just have lunch. I know we are getting together with the rest of the group later, but I wanted to just, you know, chat."
"Ooook." He said, shaking his head and smiling. Hed stopped trying to figure out Rachel Berry years ago. "Can we do earlier, though?"
Rachel froze for a moment before answering. "Um, no, I have a, um family thing before. Plus, it wont be as crowded at one. Well have missed the lunch rush."
"Lunch rush, Rachel? Its Breadsticks. They dont have a lunch rush." He joked.
"They might during the holiday season." She said, laughing now. "Just meet me outside at 1:00 and stop complaining. Ill even pay."
"Well, in that case, Ill be there!" They were both grinning like idiots. Their friendship might have started out rocky, but through the years, they both began to respect and love each other despite their differences. The two friends hugged one more time, and Kurt followed his family out the door.
As Kurt lay in bed that night, he reflected on the last few days. He has been on such and emotional roller coaster, that hes surprised he made it through everything without becoming a blubbering mess. He smiles as it hits him. Hes growing up. Sure, his emotions have been on big confusing ball of shit lately, but they way hes been able to handle them, reel them in, has been pretty surprising. Ok, with the exception of the day after Blaine cooked him dinner and he had his mini freak out, hes been pretty good at keeping a rein on himself.
But now, laying here in his childhood bed, his safe place, he allows himself the time to just think and feel. He remembered laying in this same spot all through high school, wondering if hed ever find someone to love. Sure, he talked a big game. Once I move to New York, Ill make it to Broadway, meet the love of my life, and well get married and live happily ever after.
But those things just dont happen in real life, do they? After hed met Blaine, he thought hed finally found someone he could fall in love with. Oh who was he kidding, he fell for him hard, and the more time they spent together, the more in love with him he became. He was confused at first when Blaine would ignore him sometimes, or would stop speaking to him for days, but he was so happy to have a friend like Blaine, and also so in love, that he didnt let it get to him too much.
Then, after New Years Eve, he knew. He understood that Blaine was embarrassed to be with him, especially around his friends. He was always sending mixed signals, though. When they were alone or out where nobody knew them, he was the real Blaine, but around campus and his friends he was somebody completely different.
Now that Kurt has gotten some of Blaines backstory with his family, he is beginning to understand why Blaine acted the way he did. He was scared. His parents had never accepted the fact that he was gay, and his friends pretended to, but still tried to make him hide it. Kurt knew Blaine cared about him and even though hed really hurt him, he believed they could have a chance.
Now he was the one that was scared. But Carole and Rachel (not that he would ever admit this to her face) were right. If he wanted to have a shot at a relationship with Blaine, he needed to leave the past in the past and just move forward. Oh, he couldnt wait until he got back so he could really talk to Blaine. And he really, really wanted to hug him. Who was he kidding, he wanted to kiss the freaking daylights out of him too! Kurt fell asleep remembering the feel of Blaines lips on his.