Ive got these habits that I cannot break and as Im older there is more at stake

Sins of my Youth – Neon Trees

The first time it happens Blaine blows it off – he thinks it is sort of sweet how much Kurt cares for him. 

‘Oh my God, Blaine, I'm so sorry!  Let me look!  We need to get you to the hospital.'  Kurt is flapping - that may be an understatement.  Blaine rolls his eyes and tries not to wince as he moves the bag of frozen peas he holds to his head lightly. 

‘It is fine, Kurt.  It's just a little bump.'  Blaine tries to reassure Kurt but he merely looks at him as if he is mentally impaired and, taking it as confirmation of his fears, starts to put on his coat.

‘It is not fine, Blaine.'  Kurt is almost in tears he is so worked up.  Blaine puts the peas down and pulls Kurt into a hug, effectively stopping Kurt's frantic movements.  Kurt sobs against his chest as Blaine gently strokes his back.

‘Shhhh.  I'm fine, Kurt - I'll be fine.'

Kurt pulls away from him slightly but Blaine holds him tight.

                ‘It was my stupid fault, Kurt.  I didn't check before I stood up that's all.  It's OK.  I'm OK – I promise.'

                ‘I should have warned you!  You probably have concussion.  It's all my fault.  I…  I can't lose you.'

                ‘Hey… hey, calm down.  I'm OK.  It wasn't that hard a bump.'

                ‘It was audible, Blaine.'

Blaine laughs slightly and kisses the top of Kurt's head.

                ‘If it makes you feel better we can go to A&E, OK?'

Kurt nods and grabs Blaine's hand practically dragging him out of their flat and towards the bus stop.  Blaine follows with no complaint.

                The second time it happens - they accidentally collide heads with a sickening thwack during an impromptu make-out session - Blaine tries to understand because he realises that Kurt may be a little entitled to paranoia about head injuries when it comes to Blaine.  However, it rapidly gets frustrating for Blaine to be constantly reminded of his own mortality.  He tries to explain to Kurt that when if he has another aneurism it will probably be unprompted and will simply kill him outright.  His coping mechanism turns out to be very different to Kurt's and they have the first of many heated arguments that end with both of them in tears wrapped in each others' arms expressing their love to each other between desperate kisses.

Blaine tries to understand Kurt's perspective – Kurt is no stranger to losing those he loves to things he has no control over.  It was the whole reason Kurt could not cope when he had first found out about Blaine's ‘condition'.  However, Blaine cannot live with constant reminders of his mortality. 

There are bad times, of course.  Kurt attempts to reaffirm how important it is that they ‘live each day to the full' and flies into a complete panic any time Blaine has a headache, or hits his head, or has a migraine, or feels under the weather.  Blaine, conversely, needs to just get on with his life and forget about the ‘what if's – whatever will happen will happen.  He has no control over it - so why worry?  Being constantly reminded of his mortality, or being treated as if he is precious china, or worse still - like he is Sick, just agitates and upsets him.  It is the source of almost all of their arguments – even the ones that appear to be about something else on the surface (such as when Kurt got really upset about Blaine never wanting to do anything when he actually has time off from the show) really boiled down to Kurt's paranoia about losing Blaine (‘We just have so much to do together, Blaine!  We cannot afford to waste time doing nothing!  What if I lose you and we never got to see <insert tourist destination / venue / show / etc. here>?  How can you be so relaxed about things?!').

But there are also times when everything is absolutely perfect and everything just works.  Times when both cannot stop smiling and marvelling at how lucky they were to have found each other in the first place, how lucky they have been to get a second chance.  Those days outweigh the bad days when they are both together.  They are both older now – both in their early twenties they are no longer teenagers, and they learnt the hard way the importance of communication.  They are still learning about each other but they are certain that they will get there – together.          

Almost a year into Blaine's Wicked tour Kurt receives news that he needs to be at the main office in London for the next three months.  Kurt's fingers shake after the call and it takes him two attempts before he actually manages to hang up.  They had not been apart since the day they moved in together – true to his word Kurt had stayed with Blaine as the show had toured, staying in hotel after hotel.  Kurt understood his boss' point of view – the London Fashion Week was in less than 2 months time and he was needed back in the city.  Fashion Week was mid-September so he would be stuck in London from the end of July to mid-October at a minimum.  Kurt pulled up the tour schedule on his phone:

Birmingham Hippodrome: 4th April – 28th July, 19:30 weekdays Tuesday-Saturday, 14:30 Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday

Edinburgh Playhouse: 14th August – 18th January, 19:30 weekdays Tuesday-Saturday, 14:30 Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday, excluding 24th-25th and 31st December and 1st January

Theatre Royal Plymouth: 31st January – 15th March, 19:30 weekdays Tuesday-Saturday, 14:30 Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday

Blaine would be in Birmingham until the 29th July but he had a couple of weeks off before the tour moved to Edinburgh.  At least they would get some time together – Blaine could come back to London for his break.  That still left almost two months where they would not get to see each other.  Two months. 

Part of Kurt really looks forwards to being able to actually spend time living at their flat for more than a week or two at a time.  To not having to live in a hotel room.  To not having to live out of a suitcase.  A larger part is terrified – the last time they had been apart Kurt had immersed himself in work and Blaine had…  Kurt dismisses the thought.  They were stronger now.  More grown up.  He trusts Blaine.  Besides – Blaine wouldn't have time to do anything outside of his show schedules.  Kurt worries – what if something happens to Blaine while he is not there? 

What if what if what if what if….

                Blaine stumbles through the door to their hotel room at 11pm barely awake and in desperate need of a shower and sleep to find Kurt pacing, agitated and utterly worked up.  Rather than crumble as Kurt feared he would Blaine instead calms Kurt explaining how it really is not that long a time, that nothing bad will happen and that with them both being so busy time will fly by.  Soothed by Blaine's insistence that all would be well Kurt eventually stops fretting and sleeps.  Blaine follows soon after reassured by his own insistence that everything would be fine.