Ill be your water bathing you clean - the liquid peace

I'll Be Yours – Placebo 

June 2013

She drives to stay with her grandparents rather than checking into the student accommodation that has been organised for her team for the event.  It's a good excuse to spend more time with them than the fleeting half day once a month that she usually gets by the time she's driven there then has to leave to drive back. 

The course itself runs pretty smoothly and the kids seem to enjoy it.  She finds it stressful and cannot wait to get back to her grandparents' house to some semblance of normality where she is not permanently watching what she says and does.  Where she is not a company representative.  Where she is just is. 

She misses her husband's calming influence.  He really is her rock and she underestimated how much she relies on him to keep her sane.  She misses the physical aspects of their relationship over the week as well.  Simple things like hugs or a kiss in the morning before she leaves and a kiss when she returns.

November 2013

                Blaine feels like he is floating.  They had spent the entire weekend between the bed and the kitchen reacquainting themselves with each other's bodies in a similar way that they had spent the previous months reacquainting minds.  His body hums with pleasure - it is as if Kurt has charged his cells back up and he has energy again.  He showers and takes his time in front of the mirror tracing the darkening bruises that speckle his neck and shoulders from Kurt's enthusiastic owning.  He feels whole again.  Loved.  He had used to feel embarrassed when Kurt had marked him in such obvious places before, now however he finds he loves them.  He loves the message they broadcast to the world.  He belongs to someone.

He changes and makes his way over to meet Kurt at the loft.  They had not really spoken about what this development meant.  Blaine knows what it means to him but he finds he needs it confirmed.   He needs to hear Kurt say it.  He needs Kurt to tell him it wasn't a mistake; that they weren't just ‘friends' this time. 

‘Wanky.'  Santana answers the door with a grin and a wink at Blaine's bruises – he hadn't even tried to cover them up.  He grins and winks back covering the fluttering of his heart and the unease building in his veins.  ‘Kurt!'  Santana calls as she retakes her seat on the couch in front of the telly.  ‘Your boy's here for another round!  There's still some skin you haven't sucked hard enough on!'

Kurt appears and the room lights up with his smile.  Blaine's reflects his.

                ‘Whatever you're doing to each other keep it up.  Hummel's actually tolerable to be around at the moment.'  Santana breaks the silence.  ‘I mean, he takes twice as long in the bathroom getting ready when he is actually here and not shacked up with you, but you're fucking the bitchy right out of him so there's only Berry to contend with.'

Kurt ignores her and instead kisses Blaine.

                ‘I wasn't expecting to see you again today, is everything ok?'  The feint crease between Kurt's eyebrows deepens and Blaine reads concern and doubt and a trace of fear in Kurt's eyes.

                ‘No.  Everything is fine.  I just…  Want to grab a coffee with me?'  Blaine glances at Santana as an explanation and Kurt nods in understanding then grabs his jacket.

They make their way out but don't actually stop anywhere.  They just walk.  Eventually Kurt stops Blaine gently.

                ‘What's wrong?'

                ‘I just…'  Blaine sighs.  ‘It meant something this time, right?'

The sincerity and fear in Blaine's eyes almost breaks Kurt's heart.

                ‘Oh, honey.  Of course it means something.  It always means something.'  Kurt overcompensates and pulls Blaine into a kiss, his hand gently rubbing the back of Blaine's neck in reassurance.  ‘You are everything to me.  Do you understand that?'

They stood tangled in each other's arms for a moment foreheads touching, just breathing.  An older woman tutted under her breath as she passed mumbling something incoherent.  They hardly noticed.

                ‘Blaine?'  Kurt broke the silence.  Their eyes met.  ‘I want us to be us again.'  Blaine smiled.  ‘I'd like to know how you'd feel about something though.'

Blaine frowned slightly.

                ‘What is it?'

                ‘Nothing bad!'  Kurt quickly reassured him.  ‘I was thinking.  We've been pretty much living together at yours for months now and I was wondering how you'd feel about me moving in on a more permanent basis?  That way I wouldn't have to keep going back to the loft to get clothes and the girls would have more space and…'

                ‘…That would actually be perfect.'

                ‘Really?'

                ‘Of course.'

                Rachel was furious at first until Kurt assured her that he would continue to pay his half of the bills (Santana contributed when she remembered to) until the rent was up for renewal, and then she went between being happy for Kurt and sad that her best friend was all grown up and going to be living on a different side of the city.  Santana had rolled her eyes and smiled genuinely at Kurt then helped him pack with a ‘told you - you love him'.

Kurt had no idea how he had managed to acquire so much stuff over the time he had lived in the loft with Rachel - he had had to go out twice to get more boxes and packing tape.  Blaine's apartment was already furnished so he had agreed to leave the table and chairs as well as other bits of furniture he had purchased for the place over the year. 

Blaine had spent the week between attending classes, making room in the apartment for Kurt's clothes, and helping Kurt pack.  His stomach was constantly knotted and he was wound tighter than a boa constrictor around its prey.  He had hired a small van for the next day to help move Kurt's things and had spent the night awake staring at the ceiling letting all his fears, hopes, doubts and dreams battle it out.

May 2005

                Her mother had called to tell her that she needed to take the cats and whatever furniture she wanted because her mother was moving in with her ex-boss and long-term partner.  She had not been surprised.  Her mother and partner had found a flat that overlooked the river in a posh part of the city that had two bedrooms so her brother would have a room.  No thought for her.  She was at university in halls of residence.  She had been about to sort a student let.  Now she needed to find a private let (more expensive) that was unfurnished and would let her have pets before she finished the summer term so that she would have somewhere to live over the summer. 

                ‘I'm doing something for myself for a change.'  Her mother had told her.

She had sighed and got on the phone to the letting agents.

She found a place – a little detached cottage within cycling distance of university, and had moved in.  Her father had no base in the UK so had agreed to help with the rent – he would only spend a day here or there at the house, usually between flying to work or flying to the US.

She was so lonely.

March 2007

                When it had come close to graduation she and her boyfriend had decided that whoever got a job in the other's town first would move in with them.  He got a job close to her place the day before she got offered a job close to his.  He moves to live with her.

They develop a fondness for the lines of Kit Marlowe's ‘Passionate Shepherd to his Love'.

                Come live with me and be my love

                And we will all the pleasures prove.