I'm trying to get your attention but you're acting exactly as you do in my dreams and you're finding out that you're losing the game - that's the thing about trust

Trust – Neon Trees

Shes starting to feel a bit better.  At least, shes been smiling a bit more and her husband told her hes glad shes happier again.  Theres not been a change to her medication so it must be the glimpses of the elusive sun.

Her placement is winding down now - the puzzle shed been working on for months is solved now.  Funny story - it was starting to frustrate her and she couldnt see the solution.  Then she was ill and working from home with a headache so she thought shed try to write the code from scratch on paper.  The next day she typed it in with a couple of minimal changes – mostly syntax - and it worked.  Since then, shes not really had much to do and shes loathe to start any new work as she only has until next Thursday (a half day) before shes off to Falmouth over the Easter Bank Holiday weekend.  Shes starting her second placement after that.  Hopefully never to return. Though the thought of a new work environment and new colleagues makes her anxious.  Shes not hugely looking forward to switching sites either. The traffic is so much worse at the other site and all of her friends are at this one...  One of said friends has just taken on the team leader role for her home department.  She met up with him for coffee.  Hes looking well and is slightly cocky as always.  Greats her with the fact that hes managed to get his wife pregnant and that hes about to go on holiday to Africa to see the gorillas.  She has no comparable news and ends up coming across as a crazy cat lady.  Falmouth is no Africa.

She feels insignificant and underwhelmed, unattractive, unfit and unhealthy.  And fat. 

Blaines head hurts - its fuzzy and his memories seem jumbled.  He is barely aware of his surroundings as he struggles to clear his vision.  Last he remembers he was talking to Kurt in the alley behind the club.  Kurt saw him at the gig.  He must have blacked out again.  Hes in the apartment he shares with Dare.  At least, he thinks he is, but around the edges of his vision he can see other people, desks, computers.  He shakes his head and squeezes his eyes closed.  Counts to ten slowly.  Opens his eyes.  His vision has cleared slightly and he sits on the sofa then tries to organise his thoughts.  Kurt was so mad at him.  Mainly for not telling him that he had moved to New York.  Not that he really had a right to take it so personally - its not like they are a couple anymore.  Kurt had made it so very clear that they were just friends before.  But the hurt in Kurts eyes had betrayed him and secretly Blaine had enjoyed it.  He knew he had looked good that night too - very different from how hed looked before, yes.  But he also held himself better.  Straighter.  With more purpose and presence.  It had thrown Kurt.  Kurt had grown used to the boy who hung on his every word, who looked at him with puppy dog eyes.  It took him a while, but Blaine had caught Kurt up.  Maybe even overtaken him.  Hes so sure of where he wants to be now and who he is.  Hes come to terms with himself and he knows that only he is able to make himself happy.  He doesnt need anyone else to complete him.  Hes comfortable again. 

But that doesnt explain why seeing Kurt had sent a shock down his spine and his pulse had ramped and that familiar tingle had settled in his stomach.  Hes still in love with Kurt physically.  But he doesnt really know him anymore.  Hed been unsurprised to find that he really wanted to get to know him again.  This man that Kurt is becoming.  That he desperately wants – no, needs Kurt to know him again; the way they used to.

Blaine remembers Kurt suggesting meeting up for coffee to talk.  Remembers him constantly changing the subject when it came to talking about Adam.  Remembers the feel of Kurts eyes taking in every inch, every detail, of his new appearance.  Remembers his reluctance to leave once the initial shock of seeing Blaine at home in New York had dispersed.  Blaine had affected Kurt.  Kurt still felt something.  Blaine needed to know what that was and what it meant.  Had they organised anything?  He pulled his phone out of his pocket and checked his calendar then hurriedly checked the date and time.  Today, in a little over half an hour, he was meeting Kurt at a coffee shop a couple of blocks from Kurts loft.  He bolts up and checked himself in a mirror - he surprisingly looked ready.  He had not expected that.  He gingerly touched his head - perhaps hed knocked it?  He couldnt feel any obvious damage.  He filed his concern away for consideration when he had time after meeting back up with Kurt then grabbed his wallet, leather biker jacket, sunglasses and keys. 

 He found the coffee shop with ease - he was only a couple of minutes late but he could already see Kurt waiting through the window.  He smiled softly to himself.  Kurt had dressed up for him.  Confidence boosted he strolled into the store.  Kurts eyes locked with his and there it was again. That thrill that surged through him.  So familiar.  So exciting.  It felt like a date.  Like a second chance.  He resolved to stop overthinking and went for it.  He broke into what he knew from previous experiences was a smile that was contagious and leant casually on the back of the seat opposite Kurt. 

 What can I get you?

He watched Kurt struggle to regain composure as he retrieved his jaw from where it had dropped into his lap when hed seen Blaine.  Blaine was enjoying this.  He hadnt had this effect on Kurt since Kurt had attended Dalton with him - back before Blaine had realised how he truly felt about Kurt.  Before Blaine had known how to use what he had.  It was like having a second chance.  A second chance when he had the advantage of knowing exactly how he truly felt.  He wasnt going to fumble the ball a second time.

Um...The usual, thanks.  And ‘Hi'.  Kurt replied.

So he was testing him.  OK.  He could rise to this challenge.  As if hed forget Kurts coffee order.  As if he could forget anything about Kurt.  He winked and turned to place the order for Kurt's Grande non-fat mocha and his medium drip with the barista behind the counter.  He was very aware that Kurt was appreciating and appraising his every movement.  He knew that the shirt he was wearing clung to his toned torso in all the right places and that his jeans hugged his ass in just the right way.  He took the time in which the barista was making the coffees to peel off his jacket and let it hang from his finger casually over one shoulder.  All the boxing hed been doing to distract himself from his misery at McKinley was paying off now.  He had never looked better.  That was one thing in his favour.  Hed have to have been blind to notice how Kurt had started to fill out with his, no doubt, hectic and dance intensive training at NYADA.  Hed never been so glad that he hadnt eaten his feelings.  This way he was definitely still in the game. 

The barista handed him the drinks and his number on the receipt.  Blaine hadn't even noticed the barista check him out.  He couldnt have planned this any better.  He smiled at the barista knowingly then turned and joined Kurt at the table sliding the coffee towards him as he did so and dropping the receipt and a handful of sugar packets onto the table.

Did that guy just give you his number?  Kurt asked picking up the receipt, incredulous and oh so irrationally jealous and possessive.

Blaine beamed internally, while casually removing his sunglasses and placing them next to his coffee cup.

Yeah.  He replied as if it was something that happened all the time - which recently was actually pretty true.  Especially after gigs.  But anyway... Hi again, Kurt.  Sorry again for surprising you yesterday.  And for, you know, not telling you when I came to NY.  He took a sip of his coffee to gauge how much sugar he'd need and unleashed the full force of his eyes on Kurt.  They locked.

Sorry for exploding at you like that.  I was just surprised.  And a little hurt I guess.  I mean, were friends.  Friends should know things like that.  Kurt broke eye contact and concentrated on stirring his coffee.

I should have given you the heads up.  But thats in the past now and there's nothing we can do to change the past.  So, whats new with you?  Youre looking good, Kurt.  Happy.  It suits you.   Blaine means every word.  Kurts eyes drifted back up to meet Blaines - a faint trace of colour rising in Kurts cheeks as his complexion betrayed his outwards composure.  Kurt's fingers idly fiddle with the sugar packets.  Blaine prises off the lid from his cup and tears the top  from one of the sugar packets he'd deftly rescued from Kurt.

Oh, nothing exciting.  Its the summer break, as you know, so Im back at Vogue.com.  Isabelles riding me pretty hard to get this new article finished for the Autumn edition of the Look Book, and…'  Kurt notices Blaine's snigger as Blaine pours the sugar into his coffee, and frowns.  ‘What?'

‘Nothing.  I'm being childish.  Carry on.'

‘No.  What is it, Blaine?  What?'

‘You said Isabelle was ‘riding' you ‘pretty hard' and it made me giggle.  I'm a giant child.  Moving on…. So this article…'  Blaine pops the lid back onto his cup.

Kurt rolls his eyes and smiles.  ‘Some things never change.  And you are definitely never going to be a giant anything.'

‘Ouch!  You wound me.'  Blaine makes puppy eyes and plays hurt.  Kurt knows him well enough to know it's a feint. 

‘You love it really.'  Kurt smiles shyly into his coffee and looks down again, lost in thought.  Blaine sips his drink again and smiles.  He had forgotten how much he'd missed this; the free flowing banter.  The tension, the worry that this would be awkward, it all floods out of him and he relaxes, smiling into his coffee.  He waits for Kurt to restart the conversation when he's ready to.  He figures Kurt is probably musing along the same lines as he is.  He hopes so anyway.  They sit in companionable silence for a while.  Occasionally catching each other's eyes and smiling.  Truly smiling.  Blaine feels like he's glowing.

‘So… Beside breaking the hearts of countless drunken fan-girls and guys in clubs with your dreamy voice and frustrating talent, what have you been up to in the three months you've been in my neighbourhood, hmm?'  Kurt's starting to relax finally and he smiles at Blaine.  ‘Damn it, Blaine.  There's so much I wanted to show you.  I had it all planned out for when you got here.  So come on, spill.  You owe me, Mr.'

‘Really, it's pretty much what you just said, except for the heart-breaking bit.  The opportunity arose to come here early, I took it.  Dare showed me around.  We hung out.  Met some cool people.   Dare found out I played guitar and roped me in to gig with him and that's pretty much what I do now.  It pays the bills and I enjoy it.  Practice is practice, right?'

‘Come on, Blaine.  I know you better than that.  So I'm assuming Dare is the one responsible for your new wardrobe, and may I just say, damn, Blaine.  Look at you.' 

A wolfish grin spread across Blaine's features at Kurt's appreciation, and he looks across at Kurt through his eyelashes.  As they'd been talking they'd both unconsciously closed the distance between them; their hands are so close they were almost touching.  Blaine flicked a finger out to brush Kurt's hand.  It was like a current passed between them.  He heard Kurt gasp slightly.

                ‘Come on.  Let's get out of here.  You said you wanted to show me things and you had planned it all out.  Now's your chance.  Show me.' 

Kurt took a second to adjust from the moment they'd just shared together to Blaine's sudden change of direction. 

‘I…I'd love to but…'  He seemed about to turn Blaine's offer down but then had a change of heart and smiled at Blaine.  ‘Hell…  OK.  Just give me a second I need to cancel something.'  He fished out his phone and quickly started to compose what looked like a text message.

‘Hey, if today's no good we could call a rain check?'  Blaine offered him the chance to get out of spending the day in his company.  To back out.

‘Don't be silly!  I haven't seen you in forever and I've missed this, Blaine.'  The ‘I've missed you' went unsaid but both acknowledged it was there.  Kurt hit send, then pocketed his phone and stood up to join Blaine.  Kurt was smiling so genuinely that Blaine couldn't help but return it.  ‘Just one thing - You have to promise that if you've already seen some of these places that you haven't and it's all new to you, OK?'

‘If it means I get to spend the best part of this fabulous day with the one and only Mr. Kurt Hummel, I'm sure I can promise that I will react to wherever and whatever he would like to show me with the proper due wonder and awe.'  Blaine held out his hand in offer to Kurt.  ‘How's that?'

 ‘Come on, you goof.'  Kurt said taking Blaine's proffered hand and leading him out of the coffee shop.  Their grins matching as they fell so comfortably back into step with each other.