By the time they get to Rachel’s, Mercedes’ car is already in the driveway. Kurt jumps out of his Navigator, grabs his bag, and dashes up the front steps and through the front door without waiting for Blaine to even get out of his Jeep.

Blaine laughs when Kurt leaves the door wide open, he can’t help it. (Seriously, what is it with his emotions today?) He has never really understood Kurt and Rachel’s relationship, half the time they are at each other’s throats and the other half they are practically living in the other’s bedroom. It only gets even more confusing when you add Mercedes into the mix. Blaine thinks that in some ways the three of them have too much in common and that their friendship shouldn’t work as well as it does, but he knows that in the end, it’s the similarities that keep them together and that they will always have each other’s backs.

He slowly climbs the steps and mounts the porch just as a man, one of Rachel’s dads he assumes, appears to close it. Having not been to Rachel’s house since their failed date the year before while her dads were on their cruise, he has never met them. He’s not entirely sure what to expect.

“Hello,” Blaine gestures awkwardly over his shoulder towards his and Kurt’s car, “I...” He’s not quite sure what to say and this is starting to get uncomfortable really quickly. Finally he settles for, “I think Kurt forgot I exist.”

To his surprise, the man laughs. “I doubt that considering he never shuts up about you.”

Blaine feels his cheeks warm and he ducks his head, “Yea?” One of these days he will get better at receiving compliments. He hopes. Except it’s a compliment from Kurt really and that’s the best feeling in the world and he never wants it to disappear.

“Absolutely.” He gives a faint, unreadable, smile and tilts his head towards the house. “Come in, Blaine. I think Leroy’s making popcorn now that we don’t have to deal with the hysterics ourselves, care to join us? They’re usually entertaining.” He pauses for a moment then sighs. “I’m a horrible father.”

Blaine laughs and follows him into the house, “She’s really not that bad… just passionate. Exceedingly passionate,” he adds thoughtfully as he shuts the door behind him and looks around the room.

Even with the photos of Rachel that are, perhaps inevitably, hanging everywhere, it is still beautifully decorated. He remembers how indifferent he had been to the expensive furniture and the fancy curtains the year before. Now he’s almost jealous. Of what the Berrys have built together. That they get to see each other every –

Okay, stop. Kurt’s not leaving for another three months. You still have time.

But he’s a little in awe, too. They’ve managed it and through times a lot more difficult than Blaine himself would ever see. And in Ohio. It gives him hope for his future. For his and Kurt’s future. Suddenly he’s hit with just how much he wants this, a house, a family and with Kurt. He’s hit with just how much he loves that boy and how much every day is going to hurt while he’s away. It’s not the first time, not even today, but the intensity the feelings never fails to make his knees buckle slightly.

He can hear Kurt and Mercedes try to calm Rachel, trying to get her to fall back into some sense of coherency before they can put her back together, as they pass the stairs. He pauses for a moment, trying to get something sensible out of the combination of Rachel’s babbling and Kurt’s calm (mostly) chatter, he can’t make out Mercedes. All he can understand is that Finn’s to blame, but really he had figured that out already. The sound of footprints makes him turn.

A second Mr. Berry, probably Leroy, has joined the first. He’s carrying a silver mixing bowl and he offers it to Blaine in absentminded silence, obviously trying to understand what’s going on upstairs. Blaine waves it away and Leroy shrugs and offers the popcorn to his husband instead.

“So how exactly is this Finn’s fault?” Blaine figures if anybody knows, they do.

The first Mr. Berry (Blaine really needs to learn his name) blinks at him for a moment. “Did she say when Finn called things off?”

Blaine thinks. “I got it from Kurt,” he shrugs slightly, “he just said while she was in the city and left it at that.”

The Berry’s trade looks.

Leroy speaks first, “It’s not like her to leave the juicy details out.”

“She probably doesn’t want Kurt to kill him.”

Finally, something in Blaine’s mind clicks into place and everything suddenly makes sense. Then he’s running up the stairs two at a time, even though his pants are really too tight for that sort of thing, and leaving the amused Berrys behind him because oh my god. It’s not hard to find Rachel’s room. All he has to do is follow the insanity. He’s just pushing the door open when it happens.

Kurt and the girls are sitting on the bed, well, Mercedes is lying on her back with one of Rachel’s pillows pulled over her face.  Rachel flailing, arms lashing out randomly and her eyes wide open and more than a little crazy, and Blaine realizes that he’s actually never seen her loose it completely before. Now that he has, it’s strangely terrifying. Kurt is sitting across from Rachel, one leg tucked under the other, and leaning away every time her arms get a little too close.

“Rachel, seriously, Princess, you’re making less sense than usual. Come on, Sweetie, use your words, you’re usually so good at it.” He dodges another of Rachel’s random, angry swipes and sighs.

“I- I’m not g-good enough for an-n-nyone!” She’s sobbing, though there are no tears, has she really cried herself out already? “N-not NYADA! N-not Finn! N-nobody loves m-“

Kurt’s hand pulls back and slaps her across the face with a shockingly loud smack. Blaine knows it must be a stage slap, meant to be heard rather than felt, but from the sudden silence and look of pure shock on Rachel’s face, it does its job.

Mercedes pulls the pillow off her face and sits up, “About time, White Boy.” She pauses and glances over, “Hi, Blaine, come to join the insanity?”

Kurt looks over and stares at him, trying to figure out what Blaine’s doing there. A second later, it hits him and he bows his head, feeling his cheeks warm. Oops. He feels the bed sink slightly as Blaine sits next to him and looks up.

Blaine winks at him, grinning adorably, before turning to Rachel. All he says is, “He called before,” trying to be as quiet and soothing as he could, though the idea of her being left behind is strangely alluring. He just hopes it will work, he’s never been part of the ‘Bring Rachel Back to Sanity’ crew before, and exactly how does one calm a hysterical Rachel Berry?

Hitting her seemed to work pretty well.

Yea, but I’m not Kurt.

Kurt goes completely still, bitch face sliding into place so quickly Blaine can barely catch the shift in his features before it’s already done. “Finn did what.”

Rachel bites her lip; she had hoped to avoid this. She should have known it was futile. “Don’t kill him, Kurt. It was an accident. He thought my audition was the next day. Believe it or not, I don’t tell you everything about our relationship.”

Kurt’s eyebrow arches as he shares a look with Mercedes, who is wearing an almost terrifyingly similar expression. They shift positions, moving up the bed and leaning against the headboard with their legs stretched out in front of them. Kurt pauses long enough to remove his Docs, but as soon as he’s settled, he opens his arms for Blaine, a motion that seems more instinctual than practiced like the others.

Blaine hesitates for the briefest of moments, they’ve never sat like this outside of Kurt’s house, but settles himself comfortably between his boyfriend’s legs. Kurt squeezes him tightly, a silent apology for leaving him outside, and laces their fingers together.

Rachel herself is now sitting at the end of the bed with her legs curled beside her. She has her hair thrown over one shoulder and is nervously wrapping it around her fingers, looking more ready for an interrogation than a conversation with her best friends.

The whole thing feels like a ritual, and for all that he’s been included, Blaine feels like he’s intruding.

Kurt shifts slightly, hooking one leg over Blaine’s, before arching his eyebrow at Rachel again. Blaine can’t actually see it of course, but he’s starting to develop a sixth sense about this kind of thing. “We’re listening.”

For all that Kurt’s voice sounds completely normal and he looks like he’s just relaxing with his boyfriend, Blaine can feel the tension in his body, knows that Kurt’s back is ramrod straight and that he’s looking for one good reason not to run out of this room, find Finn and give him the lecture of the century. Blaine adjusts his hand so he can rub his thumb along the back of Kurt’s, a silent message to relax. It works a little bit, Kurt lets out a breath and Blaine can feel some of the tension drain away.

“I really feel that we should get in our pajama’s and-“

“Rachel.” Mercedes’s tone leaves no room for arguments.

Rachel grips her hair once last time and tosses it over her shoulder. “Remember Noah’s crazy plan to move to LA and expand his pool cleaning business?”

“Hard to forget, considering Finn’s going now,” Kurt says, impatiently waiting for her to get to the point, “It’s all he’s talking about.” He pauses for a second. “That and what he’s going to do with the ring.”

Mercedes shoots him a look.

Rachel sniffs slightly, “Yes, well anyway, way back when Noah first pitch the idea, Finn talked to me about it. Accused me of never taking what he wants into consideration when making my New York plans, like he didn’t know I was going when we got back together after Nationals last year and-“

“Rachel,” Blaine says gently.

“Anyway, we never tried to find a compromise because he didn’t have any plans. Not after that football scholarship fell through. I thought we could figure out what he was going to do in New York together, but the next thing I know he’s demanding to know if I’m in love with him or with the person I expect him to be once we’re in the city.”

“He’s got a point,” Kurt says archly, “I’ve been trying to-“

Mercedes shoots him a look, “Like you’ve never built Finn up to be something he’s not.”

“I-“ He sighs, “that’s a completely different situation.”

“He’s not some knight in shining armor, he never was.”

Blaine knows all about what Kurt calls the ‘Finn Fiasco,’ of course he does. He had been given all the grisly details the first time he had dinner at Kurt’s house. He had asked how Burt and Carole had gotten together and had been met with an amused grin from Carole and roaring laughter from Burt while Kurt and Finn had buried their faces in their hands out of mortification. It wasn’t the story he had expected and he is still amazed at how less than a year later, they had been able to joke about it so freely. He and Kurt had still been just friends then and the jealousy he had felt had caught him by surprise.

Kurt sighed heavily, sounding like they have been over this a million times. “I never said he was, but he’s the only one that gave a damn for years. Excuse me for being desperate.” He turned away from Mercedes, “What’d you tell him, Rach.”

“I – I needed to think about it. I mean, what do you say to that?” She swallows and looks down, a single tear finally making its way down her cheek. Blaine can’t understand how the girl that cries every time she sings a solo is suddenly so dry eyed. “You’re right, Kurt. He- Finn never would have been happy in the city. We... we talked about compromises, but I think we both knew it was hopeless.”

Rachel falls silent for a moment, picking at a loose thread on her comforter. “Neither of us wanted to end it though, so we didn’t… until Finn called about thirty seconds before the judges called me in. He had his days wrong, you know how he is.”

“You couldn’t use it?” Blaine asks, just relieved she’s calmed down enough to talk openly about it, even if her voice did sound a little dead. As different as Finn and Rachel were, and as little chance as they had had to make it, they really did love each other. Blaine has known it since he first met them.

“I did,” Rachel smiles sadly, “but about half-way through I turned into Tina singing ‘My Funny Valentine,’ it was that bad. I might have run out it shame after that.”

Kurt shifts slightly and sighs, “You could have told us. Actually, I’m surprised you didn’t.”

“I had hoped that the first half was good enough that they’d ignore that I ran out. It was stupid.”

“If you got in, you wouldn’t have had to tell us… and you were afraid that white boy here would kill him.”

“Maybe a little.”

“I don’t want to kill him.”

“Yes you do,” Blaine, Rachel and Mercedes say simultaneously. They look at each other in silence for a moment then break into giggles.

“Well, no more than usual anyway.”

That just makes them giggle harder.

Kurt huffs and attempts to cross his arms, but only succeeds in running them in to Blaine. The laughter stops for the briefest of moments, but then returns harder than ever. When Rachel starts snorting, Kurt gives in and joins as well.

It takes them a while to calm down, but eventually they do. Blaine squishes himself in between Kurt and Mercedes against the headboard to give Kurt a little breathing room, but he tilts his head a little so it rests against Kurt’s shoulder.

“Santana’s right, you two are sickenly adorable, you know that?” Mercedes rolls her eyes.

“Have you seen you and Sam lately?” Kurt shoots back, “Seriously, you’re worse than Tina and Mike, god.”

Mercedes reaches around Blaine and straight for Kurt’s hair. He scowls and smacks her hand away.

Rachel’s glancing between Kurt and Blaine with a small, sad smile on her face, but all she says is, “I didn’t ask, did you get your letter, Kurt?”

Blaine glances over, his eyes shining with pride, even if his heart sinks a little at the reminder that they only have a few months left.

“I got it, yes.” He doesn’t elaborate, but the excitement in his eyes say everything.

Mercedes leans across Blaine to get a proper look, “Well?” Her eyes are dancing. She just wants to hear him say it.

Kurt grins. “Yes. I – yes.”

Mercedes rolls her eyes, “It’s a college acceptance not a pro-“

Rachel shrieks and throws herself at Kurt. “Yay! Oh my god, you’re going to have to teach me everything. I’ll do your homework and-“

There’s a light knock at the door and the first of Rachel’s dad’s sticks his head in, “We’re thinking Chinese, the usual kids? Blaine?”

There are small assenting noises from Rachel and Mercedes and a “Thanks, Harim.” from Kurt.

Blaine hesitates, “I wasn’t exactly planning on staying…”

Mr. Berry raises his eyebrows, “Too bad, we already made sure Burt was okay with it.”

Kurt looks startled, but his eyes are shining with excitement, “Really?”

Harim gives a small hum of assent, “He says he’s fine with it as long as we know that anything that happens is our problem.”

Blaine and Kurt blush slightly and avoid Harim’s eyes.

“Erm – okay, in that case…” Blaine hesitates and glances at Kurt, “Your usual?”

Kurt’s eyebrows arch, “Would it be my usual otherwise?’

“… fair point. What he’s having is good.”

Harim’s lips twitch slightly, “Fair enough.” He disappears and the door clicks closed.

Blaine doesn’t miss the grateful look he shoots Kurt before he goes.

There’s a moment of silence, then “Jammies?”

Blaine raises his eyebrows slightly, it’s only late afternoon, early evening at best, but Kurt and Mercedes roll their eyes at each other and murmur their agreement.

Rachel jumps up and starts digging pajama’s out of her dresser, tossing some to both Kurt and Mercedes before ducking into her bathroom. A second later she reappears, “Do you want to borrow a pair of sweats, Blaine?”

Blaine hesitates, then shrugs, “Yea, all right.”

“Please tell me you’re joking.”

“Well it’s either that or inform your dad that I have pajama’s in your room for when he and Carole are in DC.”

Kurt grimaces.

Mercedes and Rachel trade amused looks.

“Tonight is going to be… educational.”

Rachel giggles as she goes back to her dresser. She digs through the drawers for a minute, “Um, is pink okay? All my others must be in the laundry.”

“Oh my  god.” Kurt looks absolutely scandalized.

Mercedes is practically cackling as she goes into the bathroom and closes the door. It does nothing to block her out.

Blaine grins, “I don’t mind.”

Rachel tosses the hot pink swears at him, “You’re cleaning them it… you know.”

Blaine rolls his eyes, but nods.

“Yes Rachel, because you’re not a cockblock or anything.”

She sticks her tongue out and slips back into the bathroom, opening the door just enough to let herself in.

Kurt’s eyeing the sweats again, “Seriously, does she go shopping while she’s high?”

Blaine laughs, tugging at his bowtie and sliding it out of his collar. “I doubt it. You can put up with the horrible sweatpants for one night.”

Kurt huffs, undoing his own tie and unbuttoning his vest, “I suppose, at least she’s not wearing pantsuits anymore, my influence has done something.”

“Pantsuits, seriously?” Blaine’s voice is muffled in his sweater vest as he pulls it over his head.

“Cobalt blue pantsuits,” Kurt says with obvious disgust, laying his shirt neatly on the bed and sliding on the dark blue pajama shirt. He laughs at the face Blaine makes while moving onto his belt and skinny jeans.

Blaine reaches out to steady him when the jeans get stuck and he wobbles slightly. “You realize we haven’t done this before?”

“What? Get undressed in front of each other?” Kurt laughs, “Are you feeling okay?”

Blaine pulls a face at him, “I’m fine. I meant sleep in the same room… all night.”

Kurt’s eyebrows go up again.

“I mean there was the time after Rachel’s party, but I was pretty much passed out and we weren’t us yet, you know?” He sighs, shrugging slightly. “Even if the girls are here, I just… one night before you go…” He shakes his head, “Never mind. I’m just moping again.”

Kurt finishes pulling on his pajama pants and pulls Blaine into a hug. “I meant it when I said I was never saying goodbye to you.”

“I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but why does it hurt so damn much already?” Blaine buried his face into Kurt’s chest, taking full advantage of Kurt’s still unbuttoned shirt. He swallows, “I why do I feel like I’m holding you back? You’re lame high school boyfriend with a weird bowtie fetish.”

Kurt’s eyes close as he presses his nose into Blaine’s hair right where a few curls are just starting to come loose from the gel, “Oh, Sweetie.”

“I’m sorry, I know it’s stupid and this isn’t the time or the place, but I just… I can’t lose you.” He swallows, his arms going around Kurt and his hands curling over Kurt’s shoulders under the shirt. His voice drops to a whisper, “Part of me says to end it now so I’m not, so I won’t have to- No, I’m not – I- oh god,” he splutters when he feels Kurt tense against him. “I’m just so scared and I know I shouldn’t be.”

Kurt swallows past the lump in his throat, “I’m scared too, I don’t know who I am without you anymore, I can’t lose you, please don’t-“ He stops to take a deep breath, trying to find his composure, one of them had to be strong about this. He had known for weeks, ever since Cooper had visited and Blaine’s insecurities had started to make sense, that it wasn’t going to be Blaine. “I love you, more than Broadway, more than New York, more than anything. I’m not leaving, I’m just… going away for a while,” he grimaces at how horribly cliché it sounds, and Blaine chuckles slightly, pressing a kiss to his chest. “Whenever you need me-“

“Just call, any time, all the time, I know,” Blaine sighs, “Like I said it’s stupid.”

“No it’s not.” Kurt steps back, but only far enough to lift Blaine’s chin and kiss him softly. He’s trying to convey everything his feels when it comes to Blaine, the intense, too good to be true love, his own fears about New York, his certainty that they’ll make it. He pulls away again, “I’ll prove it to you, somehow, I will.”

“I don’t deserve you,” Blaine murmurs.

“If you could just see yourself instead of everything you think you do wrong…” Kurt sighs, sadly. Blaine looks so small in just his undershirt and boxer briefs, his shoulders hunched and looking so damned miserable. “Come on,” he reaches out and grabs those horrible sweats from the bed, “Put them on before the girls think we’re having sex or something.”

Blaine laughs softly and takes them. While he slides them on, Kurt hurriedly buttons his shirt and, making sure Blaine is properly clothed, goes and taps lightly on the door.

It opens almost instantly, “Took you long enough, White Boy, what exactly have you too been do-“ Mercedes catches sight of Blaine’s face, “Everything okay?”

Rachel, who is already examining the state of her bed, looks over, her mouth forming a soft O.

“Everything fine, really,” Kurt adds when neither of the girls look convinced. He goes back the bed and carefully begins to fold his clothes. He absently does Blaine’s as well, stacking the two piles neatly together, and put them neatly in his duffle bag. All the while, he’s thinking of ways to reassure Blaine.

“So,” Rachel says cheerfully, “What are we doing tonight?”