Aug. 9, 2012, 8:44 a.m.
Get Happy: Chapter 9
E - Words: 2,292 - Last Updated: Aug 09, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 13/13 - Created: May 17, 2012 - Updated: Aug 09, 2012 688 0 1 0 0
“Shit!” he shouted, hanging up the phone and kicking his bed. He threw his phone on the bed and slid down to the floor, not even bothering to stem his tears.
Twenty four hours ago, Kurt had been happier than he'd ever been, and now he just felt miserable.
He looked over to his wardrobe and felt a new wave of tears pass over him, imagining that Blaine was still in his scarf and hat, laughing as they talked about the future.
He grabbed his phone and started to type out a text.
'Please just give me ten minutes to explain.'
But even after an hour later, endless tears and a visit from his dad with hot chocolate, there was still no reply.
As Burt left Kurt's room, he saw Finn sat across from Kurt's door.
“Do you know anything about this?” Burt asked, pointing his finger to Kurt's door.
Finn nodded. “Kurt and Rachel's little brother were apparently together in secret, that's what I've heard from glee club … but uh, Blaine accidentally revealed it to everyone today.”
“And?” Burt asked, he would have thought that it would have been a good thing for it to be out in the open. “So why is my son so upset?”
“Um, I don't think Kurt wanted people to know,” Finn muttered. “Something to do with an argument he had with Rachel … but I know she'd be ok with it, she just needs to get used to it!”
Burt nodded. “So, Kurt's torn between Blaine and Rachel?”
“I think so,” Finn said quietly. “I'm not sure though.”
“Have you spoke to Rachel?” Burt asked. “Maybe see how Blaine is, so then we can let Kurt know or not.”
Finn shrugged. “I don't think he'd want to know if Blaine is ok.”
“That's stupid,” Burt said softly. “That's the only thing Kurt cares about right now.”
If Finn was offended at being called stupid, he didn't show it and simply nodded. “Ok, I'll ring her.”
Burt pursed his lips and went into the living room.
“Yeah he's the same,” Finn said quietly, still sat outside Kurt's room. He had his phone held to his left ear as he spoke.
“I know you're talking to Rachel Finn,” Kurt's voice came quietly from his door. Finn looked up, startled by his step-brother.
“Can I please speak to her?” Kurt asked. “I promise I won't shout, I just need to apologise to her.”
Finn nodded and handed the phone over.
“Rachel?” Kurt said tentatively, turning into his bedroom.
“Kurt!” Rachel replied. “Are you ok?”
“Yeah, listen I just wanted to say … I'm really sorry I lied to you,” Kurt said softly. “Don't blame Blaine because it was really all my idea to keep us a secret. I'm just so sorry, I don't know what I expected really, I just didn't think I could be with Blaine and still have you as a friend.”
“Oh Kurt,” Rachel said softly. “I know I was selfish, so please don't blame yourself. But I'm really not worth losing Blaine over. Please talk to him.”
“He won't let me!” Kurt said, his voice increasing in pitch. “I just want him back and I don't care who knows it. I-I just froze that's all!”
“Let me talk to him,” Rachel said soothingly. “I'll try and convince him.”
“But he won't listen-”
“He will listen to me,” Rachel said with authority in her voice. “I'll make him listen to me, or our dads!”
Kurt smiled into the phone. “Thank you Rachel,” he said softly. “I really did miss you so much.”
Rachel laughed lightly, but he could hear tears behind her voice when she said, “I'll do my best.”
Blaine was curled around his pillow, eyes closed tight as he willed himself not to cry. Both of his dads had already walked in to see if he was ok, but he didn't answer them, instead choosing to roll over away from them.
It was half eleven at night when Rachel decided to walk in unannounced and sat next to him.
“What do you want?” Blaine mumbled, tired but unable to sleep.
“I just wanted to say that I'm ok with everything-”
“At least someone is-”
“Don't interrupt me. I mean that I'm happy for you and Kurt. I know I was selfish before, but I promise you, I'm trying,” Rachel finished quietly.
“Don't worry Rach … I don't think me and K-him are even friends any more,” Blaine said underneath the covers.
But Rachel could hear the tears behind his words.
“He really just wants to talk to you Blaine,” Rachel said softly. “He told me he just froze and he-”
“I'm not gonna waste my time explaining to him why I want to be with him, when he clearly doesn't want to be with me.” Blaine hissed angrily.
“How do you-”
“Leave me alone Rachel. I can't be bothered not mattering to people any more, so just leave me alone,” Blaine whispered, his voice breaking on the last word.
Rachel sighed and went to get up when she saw his body shaking underneath his covers.
“Oh Blaine,” Rachel breathed, lying down behind him. “I love you. I'll do anything for you to be happy.”
Blaine nodded but didn't speak.
Sighing again, Rachel breathed in and started to whisper softly.
“Forget your troubles, come on … Get happy. You better chase all your cares away. Shout hallelujah, so just get happy...”
The following day, Rachel woke up in Blaine's bed, but the boy was nowhere to be seen. She pulled herself from his bed, wrinkling her nose at the smell of sleep and her crumpled clothes.
Breakfast was an awkward affair. Blaine and Rachel sat opposite each other, and their dads next to them.
She smiled apologetically at their dads when Blaine stood up, after having one bite of his dry toast, and told her he was going to school. She followed him carefully, maintaining enough distance to not annoy him but trying to stay close enough so he could talk if he wanted to.
If breakfast was awkward, the car ride to school was even worse. As soon as they had parked and got out of the car, Blaine practically disappeared. She sighed and walked towards the school. Pulling out her phone, she dialled Kurt's number, but it was Mercedes who picked up.
“We're by his locker, come asap.”
And then Mercedes had hung up.
Clicking her tongue, Rachel turned to the direction of Kurt's locker, and sped up when she saw the jocks. She dodged Finn, apologising without breaking her step and arrived at Kurt's locker no later than two minutes after.
Kurt was dressed in a dark blue sweater, tight jeans and a white shirt. With no accessories. Definitely not a good sign.
Mercedes was hovering over Kurt, asking him repeatedly if he needed help with anything, while Tina leant against a locker near them. Deciding not to bother Kurt, Rachel stood next to Tina.
Tina looked at her like she was judging her and Rachel softened under her glare.
“I really do just want them to be happy, if they're together – or want to be, I don't want to stand in their way. I-I love them both so much, and I'll get used to it, I really will. I just-I want them to be as happy as they can be,” she whispered to Tina, her eyes filling with tears.
Tina was the same, and smiled and nodded enthusiastically. “I wish something would go right for Kurt, and if Blaine is his kind of right then that's the best thing he needs right now.”
“Is Blaine ok?” Kurt asked from Mercedes arms.
Rachel gave a non-committal shrug. “He's pretending to be. Give him time.”
Just as Rachel was about to hug him, Kurt froze in his spot. Rachel's head whipped around and saw Blaine approaching his locker, clearly avoiding any of their eyes. Kurt bit his lip and whispered something to Mercedes. He pulled himself from her and walked over to Blaine.
As soon as Blaine saw Kurt out of the corner of his eye, he grabbed his books from his locker, slammed the door shut and walked in the opposite direction.
Rachel felt her heart break as Kurt looked back at them, his eyes swimming with fresh tears.
On Thursday Blaine was ignoring him again. Today, he sat at a separate table from the Glee club, and his head was bowed. Ten minutes after Kurt entered the cafeteria, Blaine stood up and left without a single look in Kurt's direction. Suddenly Kurt wasn't hungry any more.
Out in the hallway, Blaine continued to pretend that Kurt was part of the school, blending in like a wallflower.
Lately that was exactly how he felt.
He didn't like ignoring Kurt, but he didn't want to face him. If Kurt didn't want a real relationship, Blaine wasn't going to kid himself any more that they could work in secret. Blaine wanted Kurt to be his boyfriend. He wanted to know that what people thought didn't matter to Kurt; he wanted to matter to Kurt.
Yes, Blaine didn't like imagining Kurt wasn't there, but it was better than him standing out oh-so perfectly among the sea of students.
Blaine had avoided his locker when he saw Kurt stood next to it, clearly waiting for him. I don't need this, he thoughts angrily, gritting his teeth as he walked passed. A hand grazed over his arm but he shrugged it off, forcing himself not to look behind at Kurt's crestfallen face.
When Blaine walked into Glee that afternoon, the room went silent. He sat next to Mike and Puck and didn't show any sign that he could see Kurt, instead choosing to look at the floor.
He heard voices around him, and looked up, seeing Kurt speaking to Mr Shue. Mr Shue nodded and glanced at Blaine before smiling at Kurt and then gesturing to the floor.
The piano started, and Kurt turned to face the whole of Glee club. His eyes were closed but Blaine knew he was focusing on their memories together.
“Share my life, take me for what I am. Cause I'll never change, all my colours for you.”
Blaine felt his stomach tightening when Kurt held the microphone in front of him. “Take my love, I'll never ask for too much, just all that you are, and everything that you do.”
Kurt's eyes flew open and looked straight at Blaine, and Blaine felt his lungs fill up before he knew he was breathing again. “Stay in my arms if you dare or must I imagine you there?”
He could see out of the corner of his eye that Mike was looking straight at him, and upon looking, he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.“I never knew, love like I've known it with you.”
Blaine felt his eyes well up and knew Kurt's were full too, as his voice cracked as he finished the song.
“I have nothing, nothing, nothing, if I don't have you.”
The music finished and Kurt stood stock still, looking straight at Blaine. Blaine bit his lip and clapped along with the rest of the glee club.
It was after hours, during his private boxing session in the gym that Blaine finally caved into his feelings. His hair had come loose from the gel, and vicious tears stabbed at his eyes from his half-hearted effort of keeping them back, and his clenched fists were starting to throb underneath his gloves.
After half an hour, when Blaine had thought that the school was empty, he decided to take a break. His arms dropped at his sides, after all, there are only so many times you can imagine the punch bag as your sister.
Holding the punch bag still, Blaine leant against it, willing himself not to cry.
“I think it's time for you to come clean,”
The voice came clear and accusatory from behind him.
Glancing, Blaine knew it was Puck and went straight back to punching again.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
“Seriously dude, what's going on? Talk.”
After a short moment, Blaine stopped his actions and tugged his boxing gloves off. His hands and legs were aching as he sat down on a bench, his back facing Puck.
“Kurt is … everything,” Blaine finally said quietly, his shoulders stiff. “He's everything and he's everywhere and he can't be with me.”
“Oh my God,” Puck said softly. He walked over to Blaine and sat down next to him on the bench.
Blaine looked up as Puck chuckled quietly.
“I knew it,” Puck confirmed. “You're in love with Kurt.”
Blaine stared at him for two whole minutes. Then his eyes softened and his heart beat slowed.
Of course.
Blaine knew where he had to be. He stood up and jogged out of the gym, calling behind him to tell Puck not to wait for him.
His feet fell heavy on the floor, and every step felt like he was climbing uphill. But he was smiling and his new found euphoria was brightening with each second.
He slammed open the school doors and ran outside, stopping only for a moment to appreciate the fresh air filling his lungs.
When suddenly he was pushed against the doors he had just left, and the air that had touched his lungs was being forced out. Winded, he fell to the floor, and felt his head smack against the pavement, his hands too numb from boxing to catch him.
He felt a sharp jab in his stomach as a foot stabbed into him, and a dull thud on his head.
Blearily, he looked up and saw blood on the steps in front of him, and two hulking figures walking away from him slowly.
He heard a distant shout of Puck calling for him, and screamed as Puck rolled him over.
Flashes of Puck shouting down his phone reached his ears, but then there was nothing. Just a dull pain, and a flash of numb realisation, you're in love with Kurt, and then nothing.
Comments
Why must everything get worse before they get better?! I want it better now! Thanks for the update! Can't wait for the next one.