Feb. 22, 2013, 9:38 a.m.
The things worth fighting for: Chapter 12
E - Words: 3,771 - Last Updated: Feb 22, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 13/? - Created: Oct 30, 2012 - Updated: Feb 22, 2013 358 0 1 0 0
Kurt woke with a start. He took a moment to gather himself, it was just a dream. Just a dream that had left him covered in sweat and shouting.
But even though it was just a dream he was still scared. He needed to know that Blaine was alright.
He got up from his bed and walked quickly across the hallway opening the door to Blaine's room. He must not have been very quiet about it because Blaine sat up in the bed and looked at him with sleepy shock, his eyes blown wide as if with sudden panic.
"Ku.." Then the boy in the bed changed his back straightened and his face set into something expressionless.
Master. Can I be of service?"
"Oh God Blaine, don't do that." Kurt rushed to his side and sat on the bed. "I just.. I just had a nightmare and needed to know you were alright."
Blaine nodded and looked down.
"Sorry Kurt. I don't mean.. I... trust is going to be hard."
Kurt reached out and tucked one of Blaine's curls behind his ear then chastised himself for acting without thinking again.
"I know. It's alright."
Blaine laid back down all signs of his sudden regression back to slave moments before gone.
"What was your nightmare about?"
Kurt felt embarrassed, he didn't want to say he had a dream about his friend being attacked and he didn't want to raise bad memories in him when his sudden bursting into the room had obviously already done that.
"I don't remember now, but I woke up in such a panic." He shrugged blushing deeply.
"And came to me?" Blaine said softly.
Kurt looked away and felt his cheeks grow even hotter.
Blaine reached out and rested his hand on Kurt's shoulder.
"It's alright Kurt. I know what it is to have a nightmare. I'm glad you came to me, what do you need?"
Kurt turned to look at Blaine's golden eyes, he so wanted to say 'hold me please' but instead he gave a little smile.
"I just needed to know you were still here I guess." Kurt said dismissively.
Blaine looked confused but nodded and dropped his hand.
"I guess I'd better go back to bed, sorry for waking you."
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"Honestly I do not know what she sees in him. He's got a foul temper and he did lock her father in a tower."
"It's beauty and the beast Kurt. It's a classic."
"So is Hansel and Gretel but people don't get teary eyes over that poor starving witch."
"Kurt. Come on, there's no comparison."
"I'm just saying that just because somethings a classic doesn't mean that it's necessarily good."
"He was nice inside he just need somebody to show him a little love."
"The kids right Kurt." Kurt jumped, he hadn't even seen his father stood in the doorway.
"A little love works wonders sometimes."
Kurt sighed.
"Now I've got the both of you teaming up against me?"
Blaine smirked and looked down.
"Oh great, I knew it was a bad idea to get you working in the garage now you two are in cahoots. I bet you spend hours planning how to prove me wrong."
"Well if you weren't such a big head at times." Burt joked.
Blaine smiled and gently touched Kurt knee. Kurt practically jumped, he had never touched him quiet like that before and it sent some kind of weird electrical pulse through him.
"In the important matters I'll always take your side."
"Are you actually saying Disney movies aren't important? Dad get this on tape."
"Does that mean I might actually get to watch a football match without you two hogging the T.V."
"We're not hogging the T.V."
"Um.. this is the fifth night in a row you've been curled up in your own little world together watching those cartoons. You don't even bother going out."
Kurt felt himself blush at the implications of being curled up in his own little world with Blaine. When he thought about it though he had to admit it was true. It was just so comfortable to sit together. There were still days when Blaine would hardly talk at all but it was now a comfortable silence. And yes Blaine would whip around making sure the house was tidy first and that his list o chores were completed. Kurt had long given up telling him not to do them and just joined in or got their snacks ready.
"Sorry Dad. I guess I didn't realize."
"It's okay. I like seeing you boys happy but tomorrow is game night so that T.V. is mine. You use the one in your bedroom."
Kurt gave a slow nod. He didn't want to invite Blaine to watch the T.V. in his bedroom because there was nowhere to sit except the bed and that felt weird. He had no idea what went through Blaine's mind on the quiet days when he looked far and distant and winced without anybody being near him but he knew there were some boundary's that shouldn't be pushed yet.
"Okay, night boys."
"Goodnight Mr. Hummel."
"Goodnight Dad."
Burt left the room and Kurt and Blaine were left sat in silence. Kurt was not watching the movie, he was thinking to much about Blaine. Finally he took a deep breath and turned to the boy beside him.
"Blaine.. I.. I was just thinking, it has been five nights and I.. I guess I was just thinking that you don't have to say yes every time I ask you if you want to do something. I just.. I didn't know if you knew that."
Blaine stared at him wide eyed then gave a little smile.
"I like watching movies with you Kurt. " He hesitated and kept his eyes down as he spoke. "The first hours of the night are hard for me, the anxiety starts to come back and this distracts me from that."
Kurt reached over for his hand and gave it a squeeze.
"Good."
They turned back to the film. Kurt wondered if he should take his hand from Blaine's but he kept a firm grasp on Kurt's hand so Kurt didn't pull away until the movie ended.
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"Come in." Kurt shouted from his vanity table where he was putting on one of his night creams.
He watched his father open the door from the mirrors reflection.
"Hi Dad, getting ready to go?"
"Yeah, I'll be leaving in about half an hour."
"Good luck."
"Thanks."
There was silence for a minute and then Kurt put down the pot of cream he was holding and turned to face his father.
"Whenever you walk into my room and sit on the bed like that you want to talk to me about something."
Burt smiled and looked down at his clasped hands.
"Yeah I guess that's true."
"So, what do you want to talk to me about?"
"Blaine."
"Is he alright?"
"Jeez Kurt relax, the boy's doing well."
"Yeah he is." Kurt nodded. "All thanks to you giving him the job in the garage."
"I think it's more to do with you Kurt, you've helped him by being his friend and caring so much for him." Burt took a deep breath.
"I'm sorry about what I said when he first arrived. The bit about not being a romantic situation in any way and to keep your distance because you wouldn't be able to fix him."
"It's okay Dad, I know you were only trying to protect me."
"Yeah. But I shouldn't have said it and I take it back now. I know he's still very shy and still has a lot of problems to overcome but he's a good lad and I see how he looks at you. He would take a bullet for you Kurt. At the garage anytime you're name is mentioned he listens in and smiles. I was wrong to warn you off and I just want you to know that you have the right to love whoever you want to love and though I know it won't be without it's difficulties I support you in this relationship."
"Dad, me and Blaine are just friends."
"I know you are at the moment, I'm just saying that whatever may come, I support the both of you."
" Dad I'm not..." Kurt was going to say he wasn't in love with Blaine but for some reason couldn't quite say it.
Burt smirked and clapped his son on the knee.
"Well, I've said enogth. I'll be back for Friday dinner."
"Okay Dad. Take care."
The rest of the night Kurt couldn't stop thinking about the conversation and asking himself the question, what did he really think his relationship with Blaine was?
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Kurt left out a long sigh and let his head fall onto his folded arms. It was Thursday, Blaine was in the choir room playing the piano but he was stuck here in the library finishing some dumb assignment on Russian economics. Why was he missing the favorite part of his week for this? He had not been able to concentrate because he had just been itching to get to Blaine and sing with him. He had convinced himself that if he could try and concentrate for just one hour then he would have time for one song with Blaine but the hour was taking too long.
He heard the little beeping of his watch next to his ear. YES! He could go. He threw his barely started essay into his satchel and ran out of the room ignoring the librarian's shout to slow down.
He could hear the starts of a melody on the piano as he ran up the hallway and so stopped to walk quietly because he wanted to hear what Blaine was playing and if he just walked in Blaine would stop and ask Kurt what song he wanted. He leaned against the open door of the library just as the adorable curly haired boy started singing softly.
"All those days watching from the windows
All those years outside looking in
All that time never even knowing
Just how blind I've been
Now I'm here, blinking in the starlight
Now I'm here, suddenly I see
Standing here, it's oh so clear
I'm where I'm meant to be
And at last I see the light
And it's like the fog has lifted
And at last I see the light
And it's like the sky is new
And it's warm and real and bright
And the world has somehow shifted
All at once everything looks different
Now that I see you."
Kurt held back a delighted laugh. Blaine had chosen Tangled to watch twice the previous week. It must have been his favorite and he seemed to have memorized the song from just the tow viewings.
"All those days chasing down a daydream
All those years living in a blur
All that time never truly seeing
Things, the way they were
Now she's here shining in the starlight
Now she's here, suddenly I know
If he's here it's crystal clear
I'm where I'm meant to go."
Kurt joined in.
"And at last I see the light."
Blaine practically jumped out of his seat then when he saw it was Kurt he gave a wide smile and kept playing.
"And it's like the fog is lifted."
"And at last I see the light."
"And it's like the sky is new."
"And it's warm and real and bright
And the world has somehow shifted."
"All at once, everything is different
Now that I see you,
Now that I see you!"
They finished together and laughed.
"So." Blaine asked. "How did the essay go?"
"Don't ask. Let's go get pizza."
"Pizza? It was that bad."
"Knowing you were having all this fun in here and I was stuck writing that damned thing. I deserve pizza."
Blaine smiled.
"Okay then."
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The pizza had been so good but now Kurt felt groggy and heavy from all the cheese. It seemed that Blaine next to him was feeling the same way. He always worked so hard in the garage, Kurt had to tell him to relax a little. He didn't have to do twice the work of the other men, he would still be a valuable member of the team if he slowed it down a bit.
Kurt thought the movie they were watching was a little boring but he was feeling to content sat next to Blaine to put something else on.
He could still listen if he closed his eyes. It didn't mean that he was going to fall asleep.
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It was so soft and comfortable. The sound of somebody's gentle breathing, a weight against his side. But something was tickling his cheek and it was annoying him so he opened his eyes. It took him a moment to realize he was not in his room. He was in the living room and Blaine was curled into his side his head resting on Kurt's shoulder as he slept. Kurt tried to piece together what had happened. He had fallen asleep in front of the T.V. but the T.V. was now off so somebody had turned it off and there was now a blanket over the both of them. Oh God, Carol had seen them curled up together like this and when she told his Dad then it would just add to his belief that there was something going on between the him and Blaine.
But how had Blaine come to be asleep on his shoulder? Which of them had fallen asleep first? He couldn't remember all he knew was that Blaine had looked really tired. Would he be freaked out if he woke up like this? Probably. Kurt would have to move really carefully so as to not wake the boy when he went up stairs, but he was not ready to go upstairs yet. He wanted a few more minutes like this, a few more minutes feeling Blaine sleeping next to him. He shut his eyes and listened to the soft breathing.
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The sudden light woke him up again. He opened his eyes. Dammit, he had fallen asleep again and now Blaine was moving on his shoulder and sat up blinking in an adorably confused way.
"It's alright." Kurt said instantly reaching over to the boy to keep him from panicking."We just fell asleep."
Kurt looked around to see who had turned the light on and disturbed their rest together. He was surprised to see his dad stood in the doorway. He had a feeling it was really early in the morning and his dad wasn't meant to be back till the next day, or rather later that afternoon.
Burt looked at them both taking in the picture in front of him. Kurt felt himself blush slightly. His dad looked really worried for some reason, he was doing that silent and serious thing he did when something was wrong.
"Dad, what's wrong? You're not meant to be back to this afternoon. Have you even slept at all?"
"No, I got the earliest flight back I could." Burt said walking over and sitting on the chair opposite them. Blaine had now moved to the opposite side of the sofa, about as far from Kurt as he could be.
"Why? Is it Grandma?"
"No, Grandma is fine." Burt took a deep breath. "We were talking today about Senator Andersen's tactics. Studying them to try and come up with good ways to get around his smear campaigns. Bill Worthing put on a video from last year of Senator Anderson at a rally with his son Blaine Anderson."
Kurt didn't need to be near Blaine to feel the way he had stiffened, he was looked around wide eyed as if looking for a place to run.
"Blaine? What's wrong? " Kurt said reaching over to take his hand.
Burt looked directly at Blaine and sat down.
"I don't mean to scare you kid. I'm just wondering how it is the oppositions son came to being my house. If I hadn't seen those scars I'd think somebody was trying to spy on me but I'm guessing something else has happened right?"
"I would never spy on you sir. I.. I'm so sorry." Blaine started to cry. Kurt rubbed his back.
"Blaine, sweetie, please tell me what's going on?" Kurt looked up at his dad, then it twigged what he had been saying. Blaine Anderson, the son of Senator Anderson was his Blaine. He stared at the boy in front of him then looked back at his dad.
"Are you sure?"
"The hairs longer and of course he's still a bit thinner but there's no mistaking him."
"Blaine?"
Blaine was shaking and crying. Burt sighed and walked over to the two of them he got on his knees in front of Blaine.
"Blaine, son, I am right in presuming you are gay right?"
Blaine looked a little shocked and nodded.
"Okay, okay, It's just never been said out loud that's all. And your father, Senator Anderson..."
Burt left it hanging a minute but Blaine didn't argue confirming to Kurt and Burt that yes indeed Blaine was an Anderson.
"He's pretty homophobic." Burt continued.
Blaine nodded.
"I guess he found out somehow?"
Blaine nodded. He took a long rattling breath.
"He walked in on me with a boy." Blaine whispered.
Burt nodded.
"Then what happened?"
"He, he hit me."
Kurt couldn't hold back the little gasp.
"Then what Blaine?" Burt said softly to get him to continue.
"Then I was locked in my room, I could hear shouting. My parents were shouting about me. I was there for a long time, days. I was so thirsty, then.. then I was being taken away and I ended up in the training center."
"You're father sold you into slavery for being gay?" Burt said his eyes full of unshod tears. Kurt wasn't doing as well to hold them back he was sobbing silently clutching Blaine's hand.
Blaine nodded.
Their was silence for a long moment. Then Burt nodded and stood up.
"Okay."
He looked down at Blaine for along moment before putting his hand on Blaine's shoulder.
"Nobody else needs to know, okay? You tell whoever you want whenever you're ready. I'm sorry I forced it out of you today but I needed to know."
Blaine nodded.
"And you're always welcome here Blaine, this is your home now you hear?"
Blaine nodded.
Burt gave a short nod.
"Well now I know I guess I'll go get some sleep. You boys take care."
Burt walked out the room his shoulders slumped with the weight of his new discovery.
Blaine turned to Kurt.
Kurt silently held his hands out and let his friend collapse into his arms.
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Blaine sat down and opened up the cover of the book that Kurt had given him. He had thought that maybe he could write a little something about what had happened to him. He smiled when he saw the photo's stuck to the front page, he and Kurt laughing, he had wanted a copy so that he could see Kurt laughing like that every time he wanted. The way his eyes lite up, the wideness and truth off the smile. It was just beautiful to him. Then he noticed the words scrawled underneath 'to me you are perfect'. Blaine's heart stopped, they were such simple words, did Kurt really mean them? Of course not. Blaine couldn't start hoping like that, he was ruined in too many ways. Kurt might think of him as a friend and even Blaine had to admit that he did but he was just being nice to the slave boy. There could be nothing more than that between them. Sometimes it felt like they had a connection between them when Blaine was playing every Thursday and Kurt was stood there singing but that was just wishful thinking.
He sighed and ran his fingers over the words. Then he picked up the pen and haltingly started to write.
Dear Kurt, I know that I will never be able to tell you this to your face but maybe one day I will let you read this.
This is my confession.
I don't deserve your friendship.
Before I was the broken boy you know today I was not a nice person. Today you found out who my father was. I know you think I am a victim of his cruelty but actually I was a part of it. I always wanted to please my father. When I was a child I used to try and get his attention but he had no patience for children. It took me a long time to understand what my father did, it took me a long time to understand what he was talking about when he said being gay was unnatural and bad. When I did understand it there was a double shock because that was about the time I started to realize I was gay myself.
This may shock you but I thought that if I kept copying what father said then I would cure myself. Yes, at that time I though I needed to be cured. I started helping him on his classic cars and talking to him about how much I hated gay people as much as he did. For the first time in my life I had my fathers attention. As I got a bit older he invited me to rallies with him and I started to preach homophobic messages to the crowds. But the more I tried to cure myself the more I realized it was impossible and I didn't believe a thing I was saying.
So I decided I could just hide it.
I know this was wrong. I am ashamed.
So maybe now you see that I don't deserve your kindness.
Maybe now you understand I deserved what happened to me.
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He was waiting for his punishment. His body still so tired. His master was strange, he was not what Blaine was expecting. He did not know how he was meant to ask. He had even said something about being against the slave trade but that made no sense. Was his drug addled mind tricking him. Why had his master been angry with him when he had touched him? He was doing everything wrong, he was going to be sent back to the training center.
He had not expected the gaps from behind him as he took his shirt off.
Then he heard the older mans voice. Maybe he was going give out the punishment.
"Carol is on her way home, I'll call her and ask her to get some bandages and anti-septic gel."
"Shouldn't we take him to a doctors?"
Oh, they didn't like him because of the scars. That made sense, they had wanted a first time sales not him. Maybe they had sent him here as a mistake. Did that make sense? As much as everything else he supposed.
"Sit on the bed Blaine."
Blaine followed the order without thinking about it. Then his master left and when he came back he was holding a bowl of warm water.
"Just turn slightly okay?"
Blaine did as he was asked and his master sat behind him.
Then there was pain as hot water dripped down his torn flesh but with it were gentle hands giving light touches. If he was this gentle when cleaning his wounds then would he be gentle when taking him?
Comments
Awww this is still just breaking my heart :/ I am glad Blaine is able to laugh at times but flashbacks and new storys are still heart breaking.