“Mmm-Hmm, Honey Bee,” Kurt replied, finally looking over at his boyfriend. His breath caught in his throat as the charming smile was flashed at him and combined with the mischievous glint in his eyes, Kurt couldn’t help but fall a little bit more in love with him. This was Blaine. This was his soulmate. They had been waiting their entire lives to meet each other and now they had. This was his partner-in-crime; his getaway driver.

The two sat in companionable silence as Blaine pulled out of the McKinley High School car park. Kurt turned to look at the school that had tormented him and allowed him to be tormented for so many years and it was with a triumphant smirk that he turned to look ahead.

He thought of the school’s reaction when they find the bodies and figure out who had done it - Kurt had hardly done his best to conceal his involvement; he had thrown the gun that was covered in his fingerprints onto the floor and left it - that would show them. They think he’s an easy target just because he’s gay? Well, he refuses to be bullied.

“You know, Kurt, we’re in the car. Together...” Blaine pulled Kurt out of his thoughts as he wiggled his eyebrows.

“Blaine, I’m too tired for Perfect,” he sighed. “Or car sex,” he added, seeing his eyes light up with an idea.

With an exaggerated pout, Blaine said, “Fine. I’m not the one with blood on my couture...”

“You’re not... What?” Kurt replied, his voice rising in panic as he looked down. In the light of a passing streetlight, he saw that his outfit was completely stained with blood. “Fuck no!”

“Kurt Hummel! Murdering and swearing on the same day! I am such a bad influence!” Blaine chuckled as Kurt huffed, trying to feign annoyance.

At some point, Kurt must have fallen asleep - it was to be expected after such a rush of adrenaline, after all - because the next thing he knew, he was waking up with Blaine’s hand in his. As he took in his surroundings, he saw familiar golden arches shining above him and heard a slurping sound from the driver’s seat. There Blaine sat, casually eating a Big Mac and holding a large fries.

“Blaine, what are you doing?”

“You know that they say, Kurt: once you kill a cow, you gotta make a burger!” Blaine replied, cackling loudly over Kurt’s screams of ‘your hips!’.