Aug. 7, 2011, 7:57 a.m.
The Actor & The Musician
The Music Room: Chapter IX
K - Words: 1,091 - Last Updated: Aug 07, 2011 Story: Complete - Chapters: 16/16 - Created: Aug 07, 2011 - Updated: Aug 07, 2011 955 0 0 0 0
Kurt stretched out one of his legs flat, leaning his head back against the wall and closed his eyes for a brief moment before looking over to Blaine. “I mean, that’s not everything in great detail at all because I haven’t even touched on my senior year… but I’m not telling you this for pity or to gloat or anything like that, Blaine,” the actor tentatively reached out a hand, sliding his fingers loosely around Blaine’s with a soft smile. “I’m telling you this because I don’t want you to hide who you are, trust me I’ve been there and done that, because you’re an amazing person just how you are and you really need to be true to yourself…” Kurt shrugged lightly before bumping their shoulders together, his mile widening a little. “Because you’re not alone, I promise you that and although I’d love to promise you that there wouldn’t be any more ignorant pigs out there who would hurt you, I can’t because it’s not true… But you can’t be happy lying and pretending that’s not who you are.”
Blaine brought his legs up, crossing his arms and resting them on top of his knees as he continued to listen to the actor, who clearly had a lot to his past. But to be honest with himself he didn’t really know what it was like, especially to love someone who didn’t reciprocate some sort of emotion in return…well, that wasn’t entirely true, because he still wasn’t sure whether Kurt felt the same way about him or not. And he had always been one to love strongly, which is what ultimately scared off his last girlfriend…but there were even more painful memories. “To be honest Kurt, I don’t know what it feels like, so I can’t necessarily say that I understand…” Blaine looked over at the other man, meeting his gaze softly, “…but I will say that I’m sorry you had to go through that alone. You really are an amazing guy, and you don’t deserve that kind of abuse or heartbreak.” A mixed emotion of worry and pain could easily be seen on his face as he mulled over Kurt’s implication about not being around anymore. Looking away he tried to compose himself once more, because there was where Kurt differed from James…he was much stronger, as much as he had loved his best friend it was still true, the boy was brave but he had no mental capacity to deal with all of the high school torment…which was why he was successful where Kurt had failed, thankfully for the actor, but not for his friend. Blaine cleared his throat a little when he felt his eyes start to burn once more, but he didn’t want to take away from Kurt’s time so he pulled himself together and turned back, lowering his eyes enough so he wouldn’t notice but still seemed attentive.
Blaine pulled on the zipper of his hoody further up his chest until it was nearly to the top, messing with the rubber item a little for some sort of distraction. He glanced up after a moment, nodding his head somewhat, “No I understand…and I appreciate you trusting me enough to say that, because I know how hard it is to retell something that is just soaked with pain and tribulation”. Blaine uncrossed his arms, letting them hang loosely beside him with his hands on the floor as his legs stretched out in front of him. A pair of soft fingers brushed against his hand as he continued to situate himself, though the touch made him hesitate before glancing at Kurt’s hand that was covering his own. Maybe he enjoyed the simple expression a little too much, but he tried to focus back on the actor as he started talking directly to him rather than about his past, catching him a little off guard. He turned to look at Kurt, though his eyes had more trouble connecting with his then usual as he listened. “It’s not that I’m afraid of getting hurt, I can live with it, been living with it since I was a kid at home. It’s just that…” I don’t even know how to explain this, “…I’m more worried about people around me getting hurt…if that makes any sense. And I guess I’ve just gotten used to the pretending, which I know is a horrible thing to say, but I mean it’s easy to get used to lying when no there isn’t really any other guy to make me want to stop…well, wasn’t would be more accurate.”