“Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.” – Lemony Snicket

~

                No.

                No.

                No, you're lying, Blaine.

                Blaine, you can't be.

                No, you're not telling the truth.

                These are the thoughts sprinting through Kurt's mind, but no sound is actually coming out from his mouth, because though Kurt is usually so suave, so quick witted, he is overwhelmed right now, and as hard as he tries, he cannot speak.

                "Kurt, please. Say something." Blaine insists, eyes blurry with almost tears.

                Kurt is confused, and tormented by his feelings, and attracted to Blaine so much right now, not because he is dying, but because he was brave enough to tell him something like that in front of all these people, and scared of what's going to happen next, and so Kurt does something crazy.

                "Come here," Kurt mutters under his breath, before taking a great big step, both literally and metaphorically, and closing the space between them, crashing his lips down on Blaine's, engulfing him in a kiss of colourful longing that they'd both been waiting for, for so long.

                And then Blaine is euphoric, he’s so relieved that this is Kurt’s reaction, and it actually takes him a second to respond, working his lips against Kurt’s. He kisses him back feverishly, as if this will somehow make things right even though Blaine knows nothing can.

                Blaine hears whistles out in the crowd, and he smiles against Kurt’s lips before he breaks away, a lone tear brave enough to cascade down his cheek, and as he looks into Kurt’s eyes, he knows he wants to stay with him, until his last day.

                Which, unfortunately for him, is coming way too fast.

~

                “So how long do you have?”  Kurt mumbles, craning his neck for another quick kiss on Blaine’s lips. He lies back down, sinking into Blaine’s embrace, pulling the other man’s arms around his torso, his back pressed against Blaine’s front. He can feel Blaine’s chest heave upwards and then down as the curly haired man answers.

                “I…” He starts, before kissing the back of Kurt’s neck. “I have a couple more months.” He answers, closing his eyes. It had never sounded so bad until he said it out loud. Kurt bites down on his lip, trying not to gasp or something.

                “I thought- I thought you had longer.” Kurt admits, before swallowing the lump in his throat. He likes this, lying in bed with Blaine, their bodies molded into each other, just talking, kissing a bit here or there. He doesn’t want to show it, but Kurt’s been on the verge of tears this entire time. He doesn’t want to lose Blaine. Not yet.

                “I thought I did, too.” Blaine answers. “But don’t, don’t worry about it, alright?” He insists, squeezing his muscular arms around Kurt’s lithe figure.

                They lay there for two hundred and eighty nine seconds, breathing. Blaine exhales two hundred and four times, each one making his chest rise, sending a little bit more warmth to Kurt, who’s been quietly crying to himself for the past one hundred and twenty seconds, without Blaine noticing. Tear tracks are imprinted down his cheeks.

                “You’re beautiful.” Blaine mutters, pressing another kiss to the back of Kurt’s neck. In one fluid movement he rolls them over, Kurt half on top of him, and Blaine’s hands resting softly on Kurt’s hips. He smiles, kissing him full on the lips, letting his tongue slip inside, wanting to taste as much of him as he can. He breaks away, his gaze locked onto Kurt’s blue, green, hazel eyes.

                “You’re not…” Blaine trails off, not sure if he even wanted to ask. “You’re not being like this… because I’m dying, right?” There was a short silence, and Kurt looks at him.

                “You really think I would do that?” Kurt asks quietly, a little upset by Blaine’s accusation. I mean, he didn’t think he was. This wasn’t a guilt, or pity thing, right? Kurt liked Blaine, he knew that. He just hoped he wasn’t doing this for all the wrong reasons.

                “No, I just-” Blaine starts. He lets out a sigh, and Kurt can feel his breath hot on his skin. “I just want to have a normal relationship with you, Kurt. Without all… this.” He says, tilting Kurt’s head to kiss down his incredibly smooth jaw line, and then making his way to his neck, and spot Blaine loves entirely too much.

                “Me too.”

                And they don’t talk anymore, Blaine placing soft, sweet kisses everywhere he can, everywhere on Kurt seemingly so soft, so flawless, so smooth, Kurt smiling against the affection, letting Blaine take care of him, making him melt.

                Blaine slips a hand underneath Kurt’s shirt, sliding past the fabric to his pale, slightly toned stomach, resting there. Kurt lets out a gasp involuntarily, and then flicks his eyes up to Blaine. It’s in this moment that everything shifts from innocent to sinful in about three seconds.

                And then Blaine is attacking Kurt’s beautiful skin, open mouthed and willing, moaning onto his flesh as he grows hungry for more. He smiles against Kurt’s throbbing pulse, as Kurt struggles to stay still. He feels Blaine’s lips leave heated marks up and down his neck and collarbone. Kurt moves his legs now, each one on either side of him, and he’s pleasantly surprised to feel Blaine’s erection hard against his hip.

                “No, no.” Blaine mumbles, breaking away from Kurt, laying his head back, and breathing a deep breath.

                Kurt frowns.

                “Did I do something wrong?” He asks, instantly moving to the side of Blaine, propping himself up on his elbows.

                “No, no, of course not.” Blaine replies almost immediately, bringing him in for a quick kiss, smiling warmly against him. “I just thought maybe we could cool down…” He says, avoiding Kurt’s gaze. “And save it, and make it special.” He adds, winking at Kurt.

                Kurt sort of understands.

                “But Blaine, if you want to be technical, we’ve already had our first time.” He laughs. “Even though neither one of us can remember it.”

                Blaine chuckles lightly. “Yeah, I know, forgive me for taking everything slow, I just want to make it last.” Kurt’s smile fades, as he leans in for a gentle, delicate kiss.

                Me, too, Blaine, Kurt thinks. More than you will ever know.