Blaine paced frantically around his apartment as he held his phone too tightly to his ear. Itd been barely ten minutes since Kurt ran out and Blaine had only just registered the state he was in before he left. Before he left to get in his car and drive home.

"Come on, Kurt, pick up the phone, just this once..."

He didnt know if he should be thankful or worried that he got the answering machine.

"Damn it!" Blaine swore. He continued to pace as he waited for the tone, running his hands anxiously through his hair and nearly pulling it out. Finally, the beep sounded.

"Kurt, I know you must hate me right now, but please, please, I need you to be careful. I need you to drive safe and... I know I shouldnt ask for anything from you because I dont deserve it, but please just let me know when you make it home. I just need to know that you made it home safe when you left like that. I shouldnt have let you leave like that and Im sorry and I just need you to be safe. I cant... I dont deserve any favors from you but I need you to make it home..."

There was a long pause as flashes of Blaines memories from nearly three years before played through his mind. The photos from the news reports of a wrecked car, the terrible phone call in the early hours of the morning that no one wants to receive, the polished, dark brown wood of the casket clashing against the bright greens and yellows of incoming spring...

"Please, Kurt... Im so sorry, about everything. I just need you to make it home safe, okay?" He continued into the voicemail recording, his voice much quieter and not quite as hysteric, but still pleading. "And I know you said that youd continue to do this, to help me, but I wont do that to you. Ive already hurt you enough as it is. Just... Drive safely. Please." He ended the call, unable to say anything more as he collapsed on his couch and curled himself around a pillow, trying so hard to forget everything.

He rocked back and forth on the couch, trying to calm his stupid, overactive mind. He brutally rubbed at his temples and pulled at his hair and kept repeating a mantra of hell be fine; it wont happen to him while he wiped away the hot, sticky tears from his eyes. He didnt know the exact reason for his flowing tears, whether it was from being angry with himself for letting Kurt leave or from hurting because of the events that just happened, but he knew that they just wouldnt stop.

His mind was fighting a battle of memories from the past few months and memories from when Casey died. Was Kurt right? Maybe they had never really been platonic. Maybe Kurt... God, Kurt. Why did he have to go like that? Why did he have to go and get in his car and drive when he was so upset? Blaine couldnt do it again, he just couldnt. If he had another repeat...

It was another twenty minutes of a mixture of angry and hurt tears and nearly ripping his hair out before Blaines phone vibrated on the coffee table, signaling a text message. He nearly fell off the sofa in his frenzied attempt to grab it quickly.

New Message From: Kurt
Im home safe. Im sorry I worried you.

Blaine let out a long, shaky, uneven breath as he sank back onto the couch, almost sobbing with relief. He swallowed thickly to avoid another sob clawing its way up his throat and shut his eyes tightly before he carefully typed out a response.

New Message From: Blaine
Dont be sorry. I should have been more rational. I just didnt want anything bad to happen to you. Im so sorry, Kurt, about everything. I never meant to hurt you, and I wont do that to you anymore. Nothing is worth hurting you.

Blaine didnt expect a response, even though hed hoped for one. He fell to his side and curled himself around the pillow once more. Hed held his phone in his hand and stared at the empty black screen until he fell into a restless sleep.

Blaine did what he always does best in a situation that makes him upset. He threw himself into his work.

It was early in February, and Mark said their goal for Blaines EP to be finished and released was either late March or early April. However, with the amount of overtime Blaine had been putting in to get everything finalized and perfected, it was likely that it would be ready at the beginning of March.

At this point, Blaine was able to put on a fake smile at work and at the few shows he played each week before coming home late and going straight to bed only to wake up early and do it all over again. It was incredibly unhealthy, and he knew that, but its what he did best when he couldnt face what happened.

He didnt even want to know what people were saying. A few weeks later, Been&Done had speculated that something was up (how that happened, Blaine didnt have the slightest clue. As far as he knew, neither of them had said anything to anyone) and most of the comments were a mix between, "No! They were so cute together!! :(" and, "Good!! He was only using Kurt to get famous anyways." That one stung. Especially because no one knew how true it was.

Honestly, he was shocked that Kayleigh hadnt gotten wind of it yet, with all of the gossip that she follows. He figured she was busy with her new job, and he was happy for that.

Kayleigh was probably the only person—aside from Kurt, of course—who would have been able to tell if something was wrong. Which is why, at every opportunity, he avoided her like the plague. He kept postponing movie nights and marathons by complaining that he was busy with finalizing everything with the EP and exhausted from working all the extra hours. He knew he was being terrible to her; after all, she just started her job and he owed it to her to let her tell him all about it, but he just couldnt. Not if that would lead her to asking questions, which it most certainly would.

So he buried himself in music and planned to never come out.

That had worked until he got home one late Friday evening a few weeks after his and Kurts "break-up" to find Kayleigh waiting for him on his couch.

"Hey, Kayleigh..." He said nervously as he shut his front door behind himself. She looked angry and a little hurt, and she had every right to be.

"So, should we watch The Notebook or Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? Or maybe youre into the more ‘lets just forget about the whole thing way of getting over it and youd rather watch Wolverine or Captain America. I really dont know, Blaine; I havent really done this with you before." Kayleigh sat with her arms crossed and her back ramrod straight. Her voice had a tone of annoyance in it, but Blaine knew her better than that. She was angry, yes, but she was also upset and concerned.

"What...?" Blaine started to ask, frozen in his spot still near the door.

"I ran into Kurt today." She stated simply as a fact. Blaine visibly shrunk in on himself and replied with a simple "Oh," unable to look at her.

"Is this why youve been avoiding me?" Her tone was gentle, but heavy enough that Blaine knew hed have to answer. He sighed and slumped down into an armchair, resting his elbows on his knees.

"Ive been avoiding everyone." Blaine uttered to his shoes. Hed been putting this off for a reason.

"Blaine, you cant just shut everyone out again, not like last time. You have to tell someone and talk about it. Or at least let someone know so you can have some support." She scooted closer to his chair and took one of his hands. "I just want to be here for you Blaine."

"I cant do this, Kayleigh. Its not how I do things." All he really wanted to do was crawl in his bed and not come out until he had to go to work on Monday morning.

"Yes, because overworking and tiring yourself until you make yourself sick is so much better." She mocked. "Come on, Blaine. Talk to me."

"What is there to talk about? It didnt work out; thats all there is to it." He really didnt want to talk about this. Part of it was because he was never good at talking about it, and part of it was because he didnt want Kayleigh to know what really happened, and what a jerk hed been. He didnt want anyone to know.

"I find that really hard to believe, Blaine. Kurt said..."

Blaine froze. "What did Kurt say? What happened anyway?" He tried to sound calm and casual, but he could tell he was failing miserably. The truth was hed wanted to call Kurt since that night, but he didnt think it would be right. Kurt deserved way better than that, than him. And he couldnt bring himself to hurt him again.

"I ran into him when I was going out to lunch and I think he was on his way to work. He looked... well honestly he didnt look that great."

"Kurt!"

Kurt turned around and sighed, putting on his best smile as Kayleigh pulled in for a hug. "Hows the new job?" He asked her politely.

"Oh, I just love it!! Ill have to tell you more about it later. Gosh, I havent seen you in forever! The three of us need to have another movie fondue night and catch up when everyones not so busy!" She exclaimed.

"...I dont think thats a good idea, Kayleigh." Kurt sighed. Kayleigh looked at him and instantly knew. What she didnt know was why Blaine hadnt said anything to her.

"Oh, Kurt, I... Im so sorry, I didnt know. Are you... How are you doing?" She placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed comfortingly.

"Im... okay, I guess. How is... Hows Blaine?"

"I dont know, honestly. Hes been working like crazy these past few weeks on his EP and I havent seen him at all." Kurt nodded silently and cleared his throat, though his voice still sounded tight when he spoke.

"Will you just make sure hes okay, please? For me? I just dont think I can—"

"Of course I will; dont even worry." She hugged him tightly again and rubbed his back soothingly before pulling away with her arms still resting on his. "Hes a big idiot, but hell come around. You guys... I know you mean a lot to each other." He nodded once again and gave her a small, half-smile before he started to turn away, but Kayleigh stopped him.

"Kurt? I know I dont know you as well as he does, but I do care a lot about you. And not just as your fan, but as a friend. If you need anything, just call me, all right?" She looked at him worriedly, but he smiled at her genuinely.

"Thanks, Kayleigh."

Blaine sat quietly as he listened to Kayleigh tell him what happened. When she was done he didnt say anything, though he could tell she was waiting for a response.

"Blaine?" She finally asked.

"Kayleigh, please dont." He mumbled.

"No, Blaine, I want to know what happened." The gentle, caring, best-friend tone was slowly dripping out as Blaine continued to ignore her questioning. Now she was getting annoyed again.

"I told you; it just didnt work out, okay?" Blaine continued to try and push it off as he got up and walked toward the kitchen. He had nothing in particular to do there, but he wanted to get away from her interrogation.

"I know thats not true, Blaine." She got up and started to follow him to the kitchen. "Did he hurt you? ‘Cause if he did—"

"No!" Blaine spun on his heel to face her. "No, he didnt. We just... we decided this was for the best." There. Plain and simple.

"Why, though?" She wondered aloud with a genuine questioning in her tone, like she honestly didnt understand. "You guys were happy together; I really thought—"

"Dont." Blaine said, turning his back again.

"Sorry, I didnt mean to upset you." She tentatively placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Its not that, its..."

"Its okay, B... " She turned him around again to face her and gave him an encouraging smile. "I wouldnt give up on him just yet. You guys are so good for each other—" She stopped when Blaine let out a choked breath and shook his head emphatically.

"Stop. Just stop." Blaine pleaded.

"Im just trying to help, Blaine. I know you must be upset about what the tabloids are saying—" (Kayleigh was actually surprised when she picked up a magazine for the first time today in weeks and realized what she had missed.) "—But I know you love him and you would never hurt him like that." She tried to reassure him but he just brushed her off.

"But I did. I hurt him exactly like that." Blaine whispered.

"No, no you didnt." Kayleigh insisted, trying to calm him. "There is a difference, Blaine. You would never just use someone, especially Kurt, to get famous. You wouldnt jeopardize a relationship for that."

"Except we were never in a relationship!" Blaine exploded with tears filling in his eyes.

"You—" Kayleigh took a breath and just stared at Blaine with his breath heaving and his red face looking intently at her. "You what?" She asked in shock.

"Its all true, Kayleigh! Everything they are saying is true! Kurt and I were never dating! We pretended to date because he wanted to help me get noticed and we were under some brilliant notion that it would all work out fine and dandy! It was all FAKE!" Blaine started yelling as he tried to fight back the tears like hed practiced so many times over the past few weeks to no avail.

"No," Kayleigh murmured while shaking her head in disbelief. "No, it wasnt."

"Yes it was, Kayleigh." Blaine was quiet now, too, as if he were just realizing the truth and it shocked him into silence. Tears silently spilled down his cheeks. "We made a deal the first time we went to lunch at Gios. It was his idea and I went along with it. None of this relationship was real; it was all a lie." He fell back into a kitchen chair at the last words, pinching the bridge of his nose with the hand whose elbow rested on the edge of the table.

"No," Kayleigh whispered determinedly. "Thats where youre wrong." She pulled her phone from her back pocket and fiddled with it for a few moments before shoving it in his face. He realized after a moment of ignoring it that soft, familiar music was playing and he looked up immediately to see himself sitting on his piano bench, wrapped around Kurt while he played. The two of them were singing Falling Slowly.

"You—" He looked to Kayleigh in shock, but then immediately turned back to continue to watch the video again.

"Im the only one whos seen it." She said in reply to his unasked question. "I wouldnt let this get anywhere without permission from both of you, especially something as intimate as this." Blaine was captivated by the video as Kayleigh spoke. "Call me crazy, but that doesnt look like a lie to me. That looks like two people who are so in love, they dont even realize that its more than some people can ever feel." Blaine watched until the end, unmoving. He was quiet for a moment after it finished before he quietly spoke.

"Kayleigh, you were there. We were faking it and overdoing it because you were there. It wasnt real." He whispered. Kayleigh didnt look convinced at all.

"You cant make me believe that," she replied. "You dont even believe it yourself."

Blaine chose not to answer.