Sept. 17, 2014, 7 p.m.
To Save a Life: Chapter 20
E - Words: 4,068 - Last Updated: Sep 17, 2014 Story: Complete - Chapters: 26/? - Created: Sep 16, 2014 - Updated: Apr 12, 2022 141 0 0 0 0
Week 10 Day 1
What woke Kurt up that morning was a loud crash coming from downstairs, quickly followed by a second one, and then a third. Kurt was already out of bed by the second, running his way downstairs with Rachel not far off his trail.
"Is everything alright?" Kurt asked anxiously as he rounded the corner into the kitchen.
"Stop," Burt said when they came into view, holding out his hand as he was crouching on the ground trying to clean up some broken class. "Everything is fine, there was just a little accident."
"Well I guess that I should start packing now that Im up," Rachel said tiredly, turning around and going straight back up the stairs.
Aunt Annie was standing in the back corner of the kitchen staring at the broken glass on the ground. "I dont know what happened," she said shakily.
"Its just a few glasses, no harm done," Burt said. Aunt Annie must have had a spell while trying get herself orange juice, which was also spilled across the floor. "Kurt, how about you take Annie back to her room so she doesnt hurt herself," his dad told him in a whisper.
Kurt nodded, things like this were starting to happen all the time. She would forget where she was and totally shut down. Sometimes her memory would come back in a matter of moments, and others it wouldnt come back the whole day. She was starting to look older too, her hair becoming thinner along with her whole body. Kurt had been trying to spend more time with her for the past couple of days, but sometimes constantly being around two sick people, who he loved with all his heart, became too much.
He walked over to Aunt Annie, making sure not to step on any of the broken glass, and led her to her room.
"Im sorry, I really dont know how that happened," Aunt Annie told Kurt after she was back in her bed. She had been resting a lot more lately too.
"Dont be sorry," Kurt said sitting down in the chair he had pulled up beside her bed. "It was just an accident, like my dad said, no harm done."
Kurt could feel that his hair was a mess, but he couldnt find it in his heart to leave Aunt Annies side. "Do you want me to read you a book or something?" Kurt asked. Hed been doing that lately, because she still loved to read and it was really hard for her to see the words.
"No, Id rather just talk to you," she said.
"Im not that interesting though," Kurt said in a rather depressed tone.
"I know you know thats not true."
"I dont know…"
"Are you feeling okay today?" She asked, seeming concerned.
"I guess its just pending separation anxiety." It was only three weeks until he would be leaving for New York. Yes, it was only two hours away but he felt like it was so much further than that.
"Youve had quite a summer, havent you?"
Kurt smiled to himself, thinking about everything thats happened. "And strangely, I dont regret it at all."
Aunt Annie held her hand out for him to hold. "So hows Blaine doing?"
"Hes fine, he just told me last night that he wants to talk to his dad, but Im not sure if thats such a good idea. Im pretty sure its just for closure but…I dont want him to get any more stressed than he already is. Its not good for him."
"Is it important to him, that he talks to his father?"
"I think it is, and I told him that if he needs to do it, then I will be right there by his side."
Aunt Annie patted Kurts hand. "You are a good young man, you remind me so much of my Johnny." Kurt smiled as she continued, "He left a girl here, when he went to fight in Vietnam. They were so in love it was sickening." She laughed to herself, "It reminds me a lot of you and Blaine. He would have done anything for her."
"What happened to her after he…" Kurt didnt finish his sentence, but she knew what he was talking about.
"She still lives here in Ocean City, and she visits me sometimes. She works at the hospital you went to, Ive told her about you and Blaine, and how much you two remind me about her and Johnny."
"But no one can know about—"
"Dont worry, Kurt. She promised she wouldnt tell a soul." Kurt let out a deep breath, Blaine especially didnt want anyone at the hospital knowing he was gay, even though he had already screwed up with the receptionist. "I think shes the reason I know youre going to be okay," she told him.
Kurt looked out the window at the water, "Is she happy?"
"At first it was hard for her, but now shes married with a beautiful family, and I think shes very happy. And youre going to be happy too."
"Its hard for me, to see life without him, to see a different future that hes not in."
"I think hed want you to be happy, to find someone else who loves you just as much as he does."
Kurt could feel himself start to get emotional, "Can we not talk about this anymore? I just dont like talking about Blaine like hes already gone, like theres no hope."
"Im sorry, Kurt."
"Dont be." Kurt looked back at Aunt Annie, her eyes sentimental. "Im really going to miss you when I go to New York," he said, trying to change the subject.
"I am too," she sighed. "Your whole family has been wonderful to me." Kurt knew that once the summer was over Aunt Annie would have to be put in a nursing home, and he also knew how much she didnt want to leave her house.
They talked for a few minutes until Kurt decided Aunt Annie should get rest and that he should help Rachel pack. "You let me know what happens with Blaine, okay?" Aunt Annie asked as Kurt stood up.
"Of course." He bent over and gave her a kiss on the forehead. "Love you."
"I love you too hun," she said smiling. It was going to be really hard to leave her. It was going to be hard to leave any of his family for that matter. But it would be the hardest to leave Blaine.
"I cant believe Im going to be back in New York in less than three hours," Rachel said zipping up her suitcase and setting it against Kurts bedroom door.
"How would you feel if I gave Blaine a kidney?" Kurt came right out and said it because hed been thinking about it for a while now. Rachel looked a little thrown off at first, but then her face softened and she walked over to him.
"Does he need one?" Rachel asked, sitting at the edge of the bed next to Kurt.
"Blaine told me his grandmother told him the results of his last surgery, and that the cancer has spread to both kidneys. I was doing some research, and the only thing left to do is a kidney transplant."
"I dont know Kurt, how much would it help?"
Kurt knew it wouldnt help more than keep him alive for a few extra months. "I have to try something…I feel like Im just sitting here doing nothing while hes suffering."
"You cant feel guilty about this. I can tell how much Blaine practically worships the ground you walk on, and I also think youve done more for him than you even know."
"But Im leaving him and he needs me here, thats selfish of me, right?"
"Hed want you to follow your dreams Kurt." There is was again, people talking about Blaine like he was already gone.
There was a knock on the door and Finn opened it slowly. "Burt wants to leave soon so he can get back before dark," he said. Finn and Burt were driving Rachel to New York so they could get her settled in her and Kurts apartment.
Rachel nodded and turned to Kurt, shrugging her shoulders. "I guess thats my cue." She gave him a big hug, "Just make sure you think about it, but Ill be behind whatever you choose to do."
"Thank you," he whispered, pulling away. He was thankful that Rachel was understanding, because he believed that when she saw them together, she truly realized how much they loved each other.
Week 10 Day 4
After much debate, Blaine and Kurt chose this day to talk to Blaines father. Aunt Annie was having a small surgery and would be needing to stay overnight at the hospital, so Burt and Carole would be out of the house until late. Finn was in New York with Rachel helping her unpack and get the apartment ready.
Blaine had asked Jessica to cover for him at the lifeguard stand, claiming that he wasnt feeling well. Obviously she took over for him, almost enthusiastically because she was "so happy she could help Blaine during this rough time". Kurt really didnt like that girl, and he had yet to tell Blaine she was the reason he found out he was sick in the first place.
Blaine was going to come over about three, having already found his fathers number in a drawer at his place. Kurt didnt like the idea of him snooping around, in case his grandmother found out, but he also knew it was the only way Blaine would be able to do what he truly wanted.
Blaine rang the doorbell at two, saying that he couldnt wait any longer to see him. The last time they had seen each other was at the meadow.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Kurt asked as they sat on the edge on the bed, hand in hand.
"I just, I need to do this," Blaine said, looking down at the phone in his hands.
"Do you know what youre going to say?"
Blaine looked at their intertwined hands and then up into Kurts eyes. "All I know right now is that Im going to tell him about you, and how him sending me here was the best thing he could have ever done for me."
Kurt gave him a kiss and squeezed his hand. "I believe in you."
Blaine nodded and took the piece of paper with the phone number on it and dialed it into the phone. He took a while to hit the call button, but finally did after taking a long breath. He held the phone to his ear, and Kurt was almost shaking with anticipation.
"Hello?" Blaine asked. "Hi—uh, is Benjamin Anderson available? Yes, Ill hold." Blaine covered the phone with his hand. "I assumed my dad would be at work—oops shes trying to tell me something." Kurt scooted in closer to Blaine and squeezed his hand harder. "Umm…Im calling from the insurance company…yes…mhm…okay."
"Why didnt you tell her youre his son?" Kurt asked in whisper.
"Because," Blaine whispered, "he wouldnt take the call if he knew it was me. And this way hell be surprised, and you know how much I love surprises." They waited a few more minutes until it seemed like someone was answering. Kurt watched as Blaine tensed. It must have been his father.
"Benjamin Anderson? Hi, this is your son, Blaine Anderson, you know, the one you kicked out for choosing to be gay, the one you havent spoken to in two years…" Blaine was already sounding angry. "Dont give me that crap"…"Well, actually its quite the opposite, because I called you to thank you for sending me here."…"Yes, thank you, because by sending me here I have found the light of my life so to speak."…"Yes its a he." There was a long pause. "Well you know what dad? Hes ten times the man youll ever be. Hes taking care of me. And you? Youre just sitting there, probably happy that Im dying."…"How can you say that? How can you possibly just not care about your own son?"
Kurt squeezed his hand even harder and held it up to his lips, trying to keep Blaine calm. There was another pause, and Kurt could hear Blaines dad yelling on the other end. Kurt glanced over at Blaine and saw that he was crying, which made Kurts heart hurt. "Why? Im your son, youre supposed to love me, youre supposed to take care of me."..." Kurt rested his head on Blaines shoulder, hoping the closeness would let Blaine know that he was there for him. "Thats a lie and you know it! You have never done anything for me, ever."…"What? Where is she?"…"Dad? Hello?" Blaine took the phone away from his ear and then quickly threw it at the ground.
"Blaine…"
Blaine pulled out of Kurts grip and started pacing the room. "He told me to rot in hell," he said, tears streaming down his face. "I dont even know why I care. I hate him so much, I shouldnt care what he tells me."
"Its okay to be upset…"
"Its just…Why doesnt he care about me Kurt?" He stopped and looked at him, face covered in total hurt and anger, which Kurt barely saw any of. Blaine hardly became angry around him.
Kurt stood and walked over to Blaine, taking both of his hands and threading their fingers together. "If he is unable to see how much of a man you have become over these two years, then he doesnt deserve for you to think twice about him."
Blaine looked away from him. "Maybe its better that Im never going to be able to have children. Ill probably turn out just like him anyway."
"Dont you dare say that," Kurt said. Blaine looked back up at him, eyes red and puffy but the crying stopped. "You would be nothing like your father. You would be an amazing dad, and you would accept your children for who they were, which your father cant, and I know you would love them more than anything else in this world." Kurt remembered how Blaine worked at the nursery every Sunday, and how he always helped the children at the lifeguard stand.
"I dont know if I could love anyone more than I love you," Blaine said, a small smile coming to his lips.
Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine and held him there. "I love you so much," he whispered into his ear.
"I love you too," he said back to him.
Kurt held him there for a few more minutes. How could a father not care if their own son died? How could someone be that heartless?
Kurt wondered what else his father must have said to him, but he didnt ask. If Blaine wanted to talk about it then he would let him talk, but he wasnt going to ask him for anything more than what he was capable of.
They were eventually laying on the bed, Kurt had his hand wrapped around Blaines stomach, holding him tight and trying to help him calm down. His breathing did eventually slow, and Kurt could feel the tension start to melt from his body.
"He said she left him," Blaine said quietly.
"Who?"
"My dad said my mom left him a few weeks ago, that their divorce just became final."
"Maybe thats why she was trying to call you, maybe she wants to help you."
"She never cared about me then. I doubt she cares about me now," Blaine deadpanned.
Kurt didnt say anything more. He knew this was going to happen, but thats what Kurt was there for, to help Blaine through these rough times, to make him feel loved and happy again.
"Kurt?" Blaine asked innocently.
"Yes Blaine?"
"What did your mom look like?"
Kurt shut his eyes and tried to imagine his mom, "From what I remember, she was very beautiful. I can still hear her laugh sometimes. It was my favorite sound, and was for a long time, but then it changed."
"What s it now?"
"Your laugh." Kurt said truthfully.
Blaine turned over to face Kurt, taking his hand and kissing his knuckles. "Im sorry you havent been hearing it much lately."
"It just makes it that much more special when I do. And especially when I make you laugh, its the best feeling in the world."
"What did I ever do to deserve you?" Blaine asked.
Kurt smiled to himself and looked into the golden eyes staring straight at him. "I might just say the exact same thing about you."
Blaine rested his hand on Kurts hip and leaned in, kissing him softly, his lips warm. Kurt laid his hand on Blaines cheek, which was still red from crying, it was warm too, and Kurt did like it better than when he was sick and cold. Blaine slid his hands under Kurts shirt, rubbing lightly at his side, the feeling making Kurts body tingle.
"I really wish I could save you," Kurt murmured, breaking away from their kiss. "Like you saved me."
Blaine gave a small kiss to the side of Kurts mouth and closed his eyes, whispering back, "You already have."
Kurt rested his hand on the back of his neck, closing his eyes and kissing Blaine as if he could never let him go. He pulled himself closer, so their bodies were pressed right up against each other. Blaine slid his hand up Kurts chest under his shirt, brushing against Kurts nipple and causing Kurt to whimper at the touch.
"Sorry," Blaine mumbled, pulling his hand away.
"No, its fine, dont stop," Kurt said in-between kisses.
Blaine took that as encouragement to start something more and started kissing Kurts jaw line. After a few moments he slowly pushed him onto his back, and straddled Kurts hips while continuing a trail of kisses from his jaw to his collarbone. Kurt took his hands and slid them in the back of Blaines jeans, feeling Blaines breath hitch as he did.
"Youre perfect," Blaine breathed as he nipped at the side of his neck. "So, so perfect."
Kurt could feel his face turn red at Blaines words. "Off," he muttered, pulling at Blaines shirt.
Blaine sat up and pulled his shirt off, revealing a much tanner and filled out abdomen than last time hed seen him shirtless. Kurt licked his lips subconsciously and pulled Blaine down for another kiss, suddenly becoming very aroused. Kurt put his hands over his head and let Blaine take off his shirt, making sure he at least folded it a little nicely before throwing it on the ground.
Before they knew it they were both fully unclothed, heat radiating throughout the room. Kurts breathing picked up as Blaine rolled his hips down, rubbing their cocks together.
Blaine held Kurts arms above his head and slowly started kissing down his body, starting at his forehead, then down his cheeks and jawline, then to his neck, spending a particularly long time sucking right where Kurt liked it best.
"I love you," Kurt told him again, his heart racing.
"I love you too," Blaine said in return, his voice muffled against Kurts neck. He let go of Kurts arms and moved down to his chest, where he sucked hard on Kurts nipple.
"Oh god," Kurt moaned, Blaine was being so incredibly slow and tantalizing, but Kurt wanted more, he wanted everything. "I want you to make love to me," Kurt breathed. He moaned loudly as Blaine reacted by bucking hard.
Blaine pulled away and looked down at him. "But…"
After realizing what he just said Kurt blushed, suddenly feeling self-conscious. This was Blaine, he wanted to remember him as his first, his first love, his first everything. "I—"
"Do you have like, stuff?" He asked. Kurt exhaled and pointed to the side table drawer, where he kept some lube and condoms, which he had bought a few weeks before he found out Blaine was sick, because they had been going so fast at the time.
Blaine pulled them out of the drawer and sat them on the bed. "Are you sure?" He asked, picking up the lube and holding it in his hands.
Kurt nodded and watched as Blaine moved in between his legs and squirted some lube onto his fingers, rubbing it around. "Ive never done this before, to someone," Blaine said, a little unsure.
"I know, I havent either. But Ive read about it and…tried it on myself a few times…"
Blaine looked somewhat surprised by the confession. "Well, umm, you have to tell me if Im hurting you, okay?"
Kurt nodded again and tilted his hips up as Blaine lowered himself so he was hovering over Kurt, supporting himself with one arm.
Blaine slowly moved his hand down and started circling around Kurts entrance with his index finger. Kurt bucked his hips at the initial feeling, everything feeling so different and new.
Kurt squeezed his eyes shut as Blaine gradually slipped his finger inside. "Are you okay?" Blaine asked, his voice concerned.
"Yeah, it just stings a little," Kurt said. "Keep going." Kurt knew that after a while the pleasure would take over the pain.
Blaine pushed his finger in all the way, waiting until Kurt seemed to have relaxed before moving. He slowly pushed in and out, making sure that Kurt wasnt in any pain. After the initial sting subsided, Kurt started moaning loudly, needing more. "Add another," he told him rather quickly.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," he whimpered. "Please, more."
Blaine pulled his finger out and before Kurt knew it he was pressing two inside of him, which elicited a whine from Kurts lips. Blaine started scissoring his fingers, stretching Kurt open.
He curled his fingers down and hit the spot that Kurt knew would make him unravel. "Oh my god, Blaine," he moaned.
It continued like this for a while, Blaine eventually adding a third and even a fourth finger, but Kurt needed Blaine inside of him, now. "Blaine…" Blaine took the hint and pulled his fingers out, which caused Kurt to whine at the emptiness.
"Are you ready?" Blaine asked after he put on the condom and lube.
"Please…" Kurt was almost close to begging.
Blaine nodded and slowly lowered himself onto Kurt, finding Kurts entrance and very steadily pushing himself inside.
Once he was all the way inside, Blaine froze, because Kurts face scrunched up as if he was in pain. "Am I hurting you?" Blaine asked, trying to be as careful as possible.
"No, its just different," he said. "Just…dont move."
Blaine didnt start moving until Kurt was completely ready, both boys moaning as he started rocking his hips. Kurt wrapped his legs around Blaines back, pulling him closer. The only thing you could hear in the room was the sound of their heavy breathing and moans.
Blaine held Kurts hands above his head as he thrusted, sucking hard at the side of his neck. "Youre so gorgeous Kurt," he gasped across his neck.
"Blaine," he moaned. Kurt started moving his hips in time with Blaines rhythm. "Right there, dont stop." Blaine did the exact opposite, thrusting faster and harder, hitting Kurts prostate almost every time.
Kurt came with a shout, his whole body unraveling and convulsing. Blaine pressed his forehead against Kurts and kept going until he finally came as well, hips moving sporadically.
Blaine collapsed right on top of Kurt, their sweat mixing together and the sound of their heartbeats filling their ears. They were silent for a few moments after they finally calmed down, their breathing becoming steady. "Im never going to forget you," Kurt said breathlessly. "This summer…any of it…Ill never forget it."
After they cleaned up they laid under the sheets for a while, just holding each other tightly. Kurt felt closer to Blaine in a way, if that was even possible. They had already been through so much together, and Kurt knew that this summer had changed his life forever. Maybe it made him a better person, because he learned to care for someone besides himself. He also knew he would never forgot what Blaine had taught him about how to love.
"Why did you ask me what my mother looked like?" Kurt asked curiously.
Blaine was silent for a few moments before finally answering. "I was thinking…that if there is a heaven, and if God let me go there, seeing how much I have suffered through, I could find her for you, and tell her what a loving, wonderful person you have become."
Kurt didnt believe in God, but somewhere in his heart he wished there secretly was a heaven, just to know Blaine would be alright.
The phone started ringing out of nowhere, which startled Kurt. "One second," he told Blaine, sitting up and grabbing the phone off of his night stand.
"Dad? Whats wrong?" he asked when he heard his fathers voice on the other end.
"Kurt, Aunt Annies had a stroke."
And just with those few words, Kurt felt like the whole world was out to get him.