Week 8 Day 1

That morning Kurt wouldnt allow himself to wake up. He knew it was morning, and he knew his parents had called for him at least three times, but he also knew that if he opened his eyes, he would have to accept that what happened the night before was not just a dream, and he would still have to live through the pain.

The pain of knowing Blaine was going to die.

He hadnt told anyone yet, nor did he plan on telling anyone for a while. He couldnt even tell himself what happened if he tried. So for now, he needed to go through his heartache alone, and he needed to figure out what he would do about he and Blaine. From the looks of things, it was over.

However long Kurt wanted to stay in his safe, warm bed away from all the hurt, it was finally interrupted by a loud knock on the door.

"Dude, breakfast is ready," Finn called from outside the door.

Kurt opened his eyes, already wet with tears, and pulled the pillow he was holding closer to himself. "Just…tell them Im not feeling well…" Kurt answered back, voice hoarse.

"Are you sure? Aunt Annie is feeling well enough to have breakfast with us this morning. I think it would mean a lot to her…"

Aunt Annie hadnt been with whole family together in weeks. She had been practically bedridden and Kurt hadnt spoken more than few words to her since the Fourth of July, because he had always been with Blaine.

"Ill be down in a few minutes," he finally said. Kurt knew he couldnt let more of the people he loved slip through his fingers. He only had a short time left with Aunt Annie too.

After he knew Finn was gone he buried his head into the pillow and started to cry. He was trying so hard to forget about everything, he wanted to forget everything. But the memories of Blaine, and what used to be, kept filling up his mind. He was pretty sure he dreamed about Blaine, because one of the times he woke up during the night he shouted his name, tears in his eyes.

He cried even harder when he thought about the fight. How angry he was that Blaine, the person he trusted the most and had fallen in love with, lied to him about something as important as how much longer he had to live.

He didnt understand it. He didnt understand anything. He didnt understand what had happened to his perfect summer, to his perfect boyfriend, to his perfect future waking up next to Blaine every morning in New York. It wasnt fair. Hed lost his mother, he knew he was going to lose Aunt Annie, but it never even crossed his mind he could also lose Blaine.

"Its just not fair!" He cried, the sound being muffled by the pillow. "You were supposed to be with me…you were supposed to love me…"

When he finally felt like he couldnt cry anymore he rolled out of bed and splashed his face with water in the bathroom. He looked in the mirror at his swollen eyes and decided what he wanted to do.

"I want to go back to Lima," Kurt said a few minutes after he sat down at the breakfast table, everyone had already greeted him and asked if he was alright, which he obviously wasnt.

They all looked at him in surprise and Burt almost choked on his food. "What?"

"I said, I want to go back to—"

"I know what you said but, why? I thought you were having a great time with your boyfriend," Burt said.

Kurt looked away from his father, trying his hardest not to think too much about Blaine. "You said you would take me home if it became too hard for me to live here. And it has." He said grimly.

"Did something happen between you two?" His father asked. Kurt looked down, trying to think of anything that would keep himself from crying. Maybe this wasnt such a good idea after all.

"Burt," Carole interrupted, noticing Kurts distress. "If something did happen Im sure he wouldnt want to tell us all at once. Its probably personal."

"Yes, but if Im going to take him all the way back to Ohio for the rest the summer then I should at least know why."

"I heard yelling coming from outside last night," Finn chimed in. "I think they were fighting."

"Well if that Blaine kid did anything bad enough to make Kurt want to leave then hes going to regret it…"

"Burt…"

Kurt watched as all of his family talked about him as if he wasnt even in the room. Every time he tried to say something someone would cut him off. He looked up as saw that Aunt Annie was staring at him from across the table, a worried look on her face. Kurt realized then that she must have known why.

Kurt clenched his jaw and buried his face into his hands, right there in front of everyone. The room went silent as he started crying softly, everything was just too much.

"Hes just a boy, Kurt," his father said, breaking the silence.

"But I loved him…" He whispered. Blaine was so much more than just some boy.

Carole, who was sitting next to him, put her hand on his shoulder and then started rubbing his back gently. "Whatever happened, its going to be okay," she soothed.

"No its not."

"Rachel told me shes going to be visiting next weekend before she moves to New York," Finn said, trying to help the situation. "You could just leave with her."

Kurt thought about it for a few moments. There were five weeks left of summer and he knew he couldnt stay in Ocean City much longer. Maybe he could wait another week…

"I guess I could help Rachel set up the apartment," he sniffled. "She could probably use some help…"

"Just think it over, okay?" Burt said. "I thought I had five more weeks with you."

I guess more than one person thought they had more time. Kurt looked up and noticed Aunt Annie had an unhappy expression on her face. She probably didnt want him to leave either.

"May I go back to bed?" He asked quietly.

"Sure…you need some time to get your head together," Carole said.

Kurt got up from the table and started up the stairs. "We are going to talk about this later!" Burt called from the table. Kurt didnt answer him and walked into his room, shutting the door and leaning back against it. He slid down it and wrapped his arms around his legs, slowly rocking back and forth.

"Hes going to be okay," he whispered to himself. "Blaines going to be okay… my Blaines going to be okay."

He didnt even have enough energy to go back to his bed, falling back asleep right on the floor. He didnt wake up again until he heard "Your Song" filling the room, a giveaway that Blaine was trying to call him. He stood up slowly and walked to his bed, sitting on the edge. He just sat and stared at his phone as it played the song Blaine had first sang to him. He wanted it to stop so badly, he wanted Blaine just to leave him alone, pretend that they never happened because it was just too hard to know Blaine was sick.

The music finally did stop, and Kurt fell back on the bed. He had trouble falling asleep this time, because he knew he should have answered his phone. However, he did fall back asleep, and he dreamed again, just like he used to. Except now they all involved Blaines imminent death.

He woke with a start at around four in the afternoon, his heart racing and his clothes drenched in sweat. He changed immediately and then went back to bed, not ever wanting to leave his room again. He checked his phone and saw that he had over thirty new text messages and another call from Blaine which he must have slept through.

He noticed several texts from Rachel and one from Mercedes, whom he had hardly talked to that summer. He had always been with Blaine…or thinking about Blaine…or planning his future with Blaine…

Most of the texts were indeed from Blaine. He didnt bother reading them, because he knew what all of them would say. There were two new voicemails from Blaine as well. He had to listen to them, because no matter how hard he tried to deny it, he needed to hear his voice.

He held the phone up to his ear and listened quietly as Blaines voicemail began:

Hey Kurt…Its Blaine…Duh you know its me because you have caller ID and probably arent answering for that exact reason but…I really need to see you. I just, I love you so much and—

"No you dont!" Kurt yelled into the phone before throwing it at the wall. "If you loved me you would have told me!" He knew Blaine couldnt hear him but he didnt care. He walked over to his phone which was now on the floor in pieces. "Now look what youve done, now youve broken my phone too."

Someone must have heard the phone hit the wall and his yelling because there was a knock at the door. "Kurt?" It was his dad. "Is everything alright. Is there someone else in there?"

"No dad, its just me," he sighed.

He dad walked in and noticed his broken phone laying next to Kurt on the floor. "What happened?"

"What happened? Lets see…" He pretended to be counting off his fingers. "I was forced to come live here, away from my friends, such as Mercedes, whom of which I havent talked to in weeks might I add. But I guess it got better for a while, because you know, I met this guy who was actually really nice to me. Thats a great reason to fall in love with someone, dont you think?" He chuckled sarcastically to himself. "Then there was the part where he saved my life, probably why I felt I needed him all this time. He sang me a few songs, made me feel wanted, told me I was perfect and special. Stupid crap like that."

His father looked at him in shock. "Kurt…"

"And how could I forget all those promises? The ones that made me love him even more. Like he would always take care of me and that we would always be together. Im such a na�ve person arent I? So immature and silly. He didnt love me. He probably was just using me for a good time."

"If he did anything like that…" Burt warned.

"Why does it matter? Its all over anyway!" Kurt walked over to the teddy bear Blaine had won him the first time they went to the amusement park and picked it up. He looked at it for a few moments before throwing it at the window sudden anger boiling inside of him. "I hate him!" He yelled, tears filling his eyes. "I hate him because it wasnt anything like that!" He bawled.

"What did he do Kurt? You have to tell me," his father pleaded.

"He has cancer, alright? Hes had cancer for months and he didnt tell me," Kurt sobbed, totally defeated. "Hes dying and its not fair, its just not fair."

Burt walked up to Kurt and pulled him into his arms. Kurt buried his face into his dads shoulder and cried. They stood there silent for few moments, as Kurts sobs quieted down.

"Im so selfish," Kurt whispered. "Why cant it be me? Why does it have to be Blaine whos sick?"

"Dont you dare say that," Burt told him.

"I shouldnt be this upset…"

"You have the right to be angry, Kurt. I saw how happy you were. You were almost a different person. Yes, I would have liked to spend more time with you this summer but…"

"Im sorry…"

"Dont be sorry for falling in love. How could you have known he was hiding something like that from you?"

"Its not just that he kept it from me, its that he lied to my face. It dont even know who he really is anymore. And the worst part it I just feel so alone…"

"Im going to help you through this," Burt said pulling away and holding his sons shoulders.

"You dont know how much I need someone right now."

"Ill be here if you want to tell me more," he said, giving Kurt another hug.

Kurt nodded. "I love you, dad."

"I love you too, Kurt," Burt said, holding tight to his heartbroken son.

Kurt didnt realize how much telling someone could help. It was like when he told Blaine about his dreaming, like somehow, things could be alright.

Week 8 Day 4

Another two full days went by and Kurt was slowly starting to feel like his life could get back together. He fixed his phone, but Blaine hadnt called or texted him since Saturday.

Everyone knew what had happened now. His family was trying their best to leave him alone yet help him heal. Kurt really appreciated it, although he didnt know what he was going to do about Blaine. He knew they needed to talk before he left to New York with Rachel.

Yes, he had decided to leave with Rachel when she came that weekend. He knew he had to get away and start over with a new life, a life that didnt include the hurt.

Kurt hadnt told Rachel about Blaines illness yet. He felt like the less she knew the better, although it was hard to keep Finn from telling her.

He spent most of his time in bed sleeping off the memories, and debating whether or not to call Blaine. Every time he would ask himself that question the answer would always be no, there was plenty of time to call him later.

As much as he was feeling better during the day, the nights were still hell. It was dream after dream and nightmare after nightmare of Blaine dying, and Kurt unable to save him. Sometimes he would drown like the first time, and other times he would watch the line fall flat as he laid in a hospital bed. It was becoming such a commonplace event that Kurt eventually stopped crying whenever he woke up. Monday night was more of the same, and when he woke up extremely early Tuesday morning he decided not to go back to sleep.

He started downstairs to get himself a cup of coffee, but on his way noticed Aunt Annies door was open. He peered inside and saw the old woman sitting at her piano, staring at the keys.

"Aunt Annie?" He asked softly, wondering what she was doing.

She didnt turn around and Kurt was starting to get worried, so he walked inside her room slowly. "Is everything alright? Its me, Kurt."

"I cant play," she said softly.

Kurt stopped right behind her. At first stunned and then desperate, because Blaine had been the one to help her remember. He closed the door and then sat at her side on the bench. "Ill help you remember. How did Blaine do it again?" He started to say, laying his hands on the keys.

The old woman lifted her shaky hands and laid them on top of Kurts. "Im sorry I didnt remember about the boy being ill."

Kurt slowly closed his eyes and exhaled. "Its not your fault…"

"But if I had told you…Theres more that I didnt remember about Blaine. Things that may help you understand why he didnt tell, or couldnt tell you he was sick."

Kurt dropped his head and then looked back up at Aunt Annie, guilt present in her eyes. It wasnt her fault that she was sick and couldnt remember things. Even if they were the most important things.

"I am starting to remember things, different memories are coming back, and now that Im putting them together..." She took a deep breath before beginning. "His grandmother, Cecilia, and I used to be great friends," she began. "Shes just a few months younger than me, and we went to school together here in the city. She was a sweet girl, yet I always knew something was wrong." She paused for a moment and then started again, like she was living back a memory. "One day, she didnt come to school, and she never missed school. I was worried, so I went to her house to see if she was ill. When I arrived at her house…" She was visibly shaking. "…I heard screaming from inside the house. I knew it was her right away, but I was too afraid to do anything."

"What happened to her?" Kurt asked.

"Her father beat her for not doing her chores the day before. He would beat her almost every day, and that wasnt even the worst of it." Aunt Annie said. "You should know her father was a large man, who had just come back from fighting in World War II. We were all afraid of him, I think Cecilia was the most afraid of him. Until then I didnt know why…"

"And what does this have to do with Blaine?" Kurt asked skeptically.

"Im getting there," she said. Kurt nodded and let her continue. "As we got older we started drifting apart. Her father died when she was about 20, around the time I had Johnny I remember. I thought she was finally going to be happy, but he messed her up so badly. When she married the Anderson boy, we were all so happy for her, and she did love him so much..." She looked around for a moment. "Could you walk me to my bed? I think I need to lie down."

Kurt walked her to the bed and pulled the piano bench next to her so he could listen to the story. He took her hand and she started again. "But then she had her only son, Benjamin, who she called Benny. He was the cutest thing, but at first Cecilia didnt see him that way. We learned later that she had a horrible case of Postpartum Depression, but back then those things were hardly diagnosed."

"What did she do to him?" Kurt asked.

"Neglected him mostly, she wasnt able to look at him for months because he looked too much like her father. Johnny had passed away by the time Benny was five, and Carole moved in with me after my sister died a few years after that. He and Carole went to school together, same class and everything. I heard…rumors from other mothers, which turned out to be true."

Kurt closed his eyes, he almost didnt want to know what she must have done. "She…she would play mind games with him. She never beat him, because she would never become her father. But she emotionally abused him… She would give him rules that didnt make sense, but if he didnt follow them she would lock him in a closet for hours on end, or lock him in his room with no food for days...So many horrible punishments. She would isolate him from other children, sometimes only letting him make friends with the children she knew were on vacation so that she would have to comfort him when they left. She started homeschooling him when he was about fifteen, trying to keep him away from the evils of the world. But for some reason I was always too afraid to do anything to help that poor boy, and so was everyone else. But it was such a different time back then, you never got involved."

"Do you think she does that to Blaine? Like, locks him in closets and stuff?"

"From what I can tell, his father sent him to her for a reason. He knew that she would do the same to Blaine."

"But why did he tell me his grandmother couldnt know when she had known all along? Why make us hide our relationship? That doesnt make sense."

"Do you know how they are paying for his treatment? They were definitely not well off."

"Yeah, that Jessica girl told me their church pays for it with donations." Kurt paused as the sudden realization hit him. "If the church knew he was gay…"

"They probably wouldnt be so giving, would they?" She finished his sentence. "It could be so much worse over there than you think, I would really talk with Blaine if I were you."

Kurt was still speechless. Aunt Annies attempt to help him understand made him even more confused. "But…"

"Kurt…" He looked up at the woman and held her hand tightly. "Do you regret falling in love with Blaine?"

He realized that was the question that would solve everything. Did he regret it all, now that he knew Blaine was sick? Did Blaine being sick really matter? The lies were what hurt the most, but what if they werent his fault?

Kurt shook his head and tears started falling from his eyes. "No…I could never regret it."

Kurt ran back to his room and noticed it was only eight oclock. Blaine would be up by then, right? He grabbed his phone and realized he had never listened to all of the voicemails Blaine left, so he quickly dialed the voicemail box and listened, heart racing because he wanted to hear Blaine voice again so badly.

He listened to the whole first one this time:

Hey Kurt…Its Blaine…Duh you know its me because you have caller ID and probably arent answering for that exact reason but…I really need to see you. I just, I love you so much and Im so sorry I hurt you. I- I messed up and you deserve to hate me, but please, I need to see you again. I can explain it all just call me back if you hear this. Im so sorry…

The second one started immediately after, but this time it didnt sound like the same Blaine. He sounded weak and fragile, and Kurt could barely hear his voice:

Kurt…Please answer…I-Im in the hospital—but dont worry okay? I dont want you to worry about me. Just in case its the last time I can tell you…I love you, I love you, I love you. Okay? Im going to say it again because I want you to know that Im here fighting for you and only you. I love you Kurt Hummel, and you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. Dont come here though I—

Blaines voice suddenly stopped. "Blaine? Blaine come back," he choked. Kurt was shaking and hiccupping to hold back sobs. Blaine was in the hospital…

What if he was already too late?