14th of March

Uhm, hi.

My name’s Kurt Hummel and… yeah, that’s about it.

There really isn’t much more to it than that.

My name’s Kurt Hummel. I don’t have an identity.

I’m just a name. A body with a name. I no longer know much more about myself than that.

...Okay. So. I don’t really know what I’m supposed to write here. But it feels sort of nice anyways. It feels like there’s someone that listens to what I have to say. (Or write..)

It may sound egoistic, but I’m kind of alone and I need someone...

But I’m in no position to ask anything else from anyone, I know. I’m sorry.

It just… it tends to get a little boring, always sitting in your room all the time without anyone to talk to but yourself.

   It haven’t always been like thing are now. I had friends too, before. But they’re all gone now. We’ve lost contact ‘cause I’m… like this.

I never leave the house anymore. Haven’t been outdoors in months.

Why is that, you might ask? (You? Who am I kidding, there’s really no one that cares about this, no one that listens..)

Anyways, I have no idea what’s wrong. No one does. No one knows what’s wrong with me. And that’s the way it’s going to stay, the way it have been for the last five years.

     “Hang in there.”
     “Stay strong.”
     “You can do this.”

I’m sorry, but I can’t.

I’m done surviving. I’ve spent almost my whole life surviving. So I’m done. I don’t want to survive anymore. I want to live. Not survive.

I want a life. Not an existence.

But I don’t have the right to crave anything, not more than I already am. I’m sorry.