What a pretty color… I know this color – and the eyes they belong to. No, don’t close them. I want to see them, lose myself in their deepness. I want to kiss them too. And your lips, they are meant to be on mine. Kurt, please stay. Don’t leave me. I don’t want to breathe. It hurts so much, Kurt. The air is cold and it hurts to breathe. I don’t want it to hurt, please Kurt, please make it stop.

“Blaine! Blaine, come on! Wake up, we have to move from here!” Blaine coughs once more and feels the cold and salty water leaving his lungs and getting replaced by much needed air. His head is spinning from the lack of oxygen, but his orientation slowly comes back. He tries to sit more upright to stay away from the water with his face. “Blaine, are you okay?” The voice, combined with the hands on his shoulders keeping him steady, tells Blaine that this is not the person he wants it to be.

On the other hand, why should Kurt be down here, finding me?

“Mr. Andrews – What happened?” Mr. Andrews pulls him to his feet. Blaine notices the water is only reaching his calves now. “I don’t know Blaine. When I found you, you just lay on the floor, unconscious, with your face in the water. You are lucky I had the key for the lattice with me.” Blaine looks at the opened lattice in surprise. “Do you think you can walk? We have to hurry up, otherwise all exits will be cut off by the water.” Blaine makes a few shaky steps before nodding. Mr. Andrews helps him to stay upright as they make their way through the corridors. Blaine is thankful that out of all people the architect of the ship has found him, probably the only person that knows every corner of the ship by heart. A few minutes later, they are on the main corridor again, the corridor Blaine used to get to the dining hall everyday. It is scary to walk through it without a single person in sight and being forced to walk sideward because of the ship’s sloping. Blaine has to lean on Mr. Andrews every time the ship is shaking hard, but he manages to walk by himself most of the time.

Finally, finally they make their way outside. “There are three boats left, come on.” Mr. Andrews drags Blaine towards the boats. Blaine turns his head in a searching manner from side to side, trying to catch a glimpse of the familiar chestnut brown hair he looked for all evening. Mr. Andrews reaches the first when Blaine realizes what he is trying to do and stops abruptly. “Stop. I won’t enter one of these boats.” Mr. Andrews looks at him as if he lost his mind. “Blaine, what are you talking about? You have to enter that boat!” But Blaine firmly shakes his head. “I can’t! I have to find Kurt. I won’t leave without him, I promised I wouldn’t.” Mr. Andrews sighs, knowing the exact reason for Blaine’s stubbornness. “Blaine, listen…” Blaine cuts him off, fighting back sobs of exhaustion and desperation. “Don’t tell me it’s not worth it, or that it is more important to save my own life, because it’s not worth living it when he doesn’t survive!” Mr. Andrews tries again. “Blaine!” “No, you have no idea! He is alone and injured, and I need to find him, to know he’s alright. Just let me go!” He tries to shake off Mr. Andrews’ hand that still has a firm grip on his arm. This time, Mr. Andrews raises his voice. “Blaine, I saw him! He is on a boat that left a while ago. He is okay and he is safe!” Blaine stares at him, not daring to believe his words. “You are lying.” “No I’m not. Kurt is safe and when you stay on this ship, for nothing, you will die.”

A huge bubble of joy is forming in Blaine’s chest, making it’s way through Blaine’s mouth in form of a breathless laughter that is forcing tears of happiness into his eyes and turns into sobs of relief he can’t hold back soon after.

Kurt is safe.

Mr. Andrews tries to push Blaine in the direction of the boat, but he hesitates once more. “Are you coming too?”  Mr. Andrews tries to avoid his eyes. “I can’t. I built this ship, and I can’t leave it until everyone is safe.” This time, Blaine grabs Mr. Andrews’ shoulders. “You won’t be able to. I only enter when you do too.” Mr. Andrews’ eyes shine with guilt, so Blaine continues. “This is not your fault. So don’t endanger your life because of something you can’t change.” Finally, Mr. Andrews enters the boat and helps Blaine taking a seat next to him. Blaine sits down, allowing his muscles to relax for the first time this evening. Mr. Andrews has to support his body when Blaine sways slightly, exhaustion washing over him. Finally he can let go, because Kurt is safe.

Feeling a pounding in the back of his head while the adrenaline is slowly leaving his body, he gets surrounded by darkness once again, having just this one thought lingering on his mind.

Kurt is safe.

Blaine blinks a few times. All he can see is the sky with its countless stars. The ground he is laying on is slowly swaying, a soft movement that remembers him where he is.

Mr. Andrews’ face is leaning over him, eyes looking concerned at him.

“Thank god, you are awake. Is everything alright?” Blaine sits up to feel his head. It hurts a little, but the pain is bearable. “I think so, yeah.” Suddenly Blaine remembers why he has to sit in a safety boat with an injury on his head. “What happened to the ship?” Mr. Andrews has to swallow hard. “Turn around.” It is the scariest thing Blaine has ever seen. About 3 000 feet in front of him, the Titanic is sticking out of the water like a huge skyscraper. The heck is at the highest point; the bow is under water, like the whole frontal part of the ship.

“Oh my god!” Blaine’s words are nothing but a gasp. He stares at the ship, not able to look away when the ship is breaking suddenly, the heck falling back into the water, while the bow is sinking, away from the surface and into the darkness. The people on the ship are screaming, but all Blaine can hear is an indistinct whisper. Then, like drawn by an invisible power, the heck is going up again before standing still. Blaine weren’t able to move if his life depended on it, he is banned by the scenery in front of him. Slowly, like a sponge soaking itself full of water, the rest of the ship starts to get pulled down. After a few minutes that felt like hours, the ship is completely under water, drifting towards the bottom of the ocean. Every passenger in the boat is staring at the sea, the place where their life changed upside down within a few hours. The only sounds are occasional sobs, coming from a young woman with remarkable red hair, which is held and kissed by her boyfriend. Blaine looks at them for a while, wishing more than anything that he could do the same. After a while he looks away, recognizing Mr. Andrews looking at him with a worried expression. “Blaine… I have a confession to make. I- I did lie to you. I haven’t seen Kurt, but I’m sure he is alright; I mean he is a clever boy. I’m so sorry, but it was the only chance to save you from certain death!”

Please don’t do this to me. I can’t handle it anymore. It hurts too much.

Blaine closes his eyes, wishing so bad to forget everything what happened, every person he has met, every word that was said, every hour of his life. Then it wouldn’t hurt as much as it does now. A few tears are slipping through his lashes and he can’t do anything, too tired to cry any more or even be mad at the man next to him. All he can do is cling to the chance that Kurt has made it without him. Because if he hasn’t, Blaine can’t find a reason to get rescued. In those few days his life has changed completely, and there is no way he is able to change it back, even if he would want to. But his new life doesn’t make any sense in a world without Kurt.