A/N: Hello! I hope you all enjoyed the first chapter. Some questions have arisen, so I will try my best here to answer them so you aren't confused for the rest of the story.

1. If the incident occurred during Kurts freshman year, and its now his senior year, wouldnt it have only been three years since he stopped talking, rather than four?

Yes! I'm a dingus and can't do basic math. Kurt has not spoken in 3 years, not 4.

      2)  Since it happened freshman year, Im also curious as to when exactly during that year it         

           happened, because you mention Kurt being in Glee club before the bullying got too bad?

The first incident happened around November, long enough for Kurt to establish himself in glee. Also, the incident does happen more than once. I was going to get to this in later chapters, but it doesn't really matter if I'm telling you now. I probably should have put it in the first chapter.

       3)  Why didn't Burt send Kurt to therapy? Why did he take so long to transfer Kurt?

In my original story, Burt did send Kurt to therapy. I decided not to mention it in the revised version because I couldn't fit it in with how I wanted to write it. Either way, Kurt stopped going to therapy because he wouldn't open up enough to let it actually help him and he and his dad were having money issues. As I mentioned a little in the first chapter, Burt does think Kurt's not talking is his way of being a rebellious teenager. He does not know about the bullying until he sees Kurt changing his shirt and notices the bruises on his back.

I hope this clears up any confusion! I will try to be clearer in the new chapters.

Flashbacks, thoughts, and dreams in italics. Whiteboard writing in bold.

Warnings for self-harm, rape, language

-/-

    A unfamiliar whimpering noise awakens Blaine at three a.m. that night. He sits up in his bed confused before hearing more whimpering and seeing Kurt shift restlessly on the bed across from him. His whimpers grow louder and Blaine can tell that tears are streaming down Kurt's face. He's thrashing wildly in his bed, tangled in the covers. Blaine realizes his roommate must be having a nightmare and gets up to see if he can do anything to help. Blaine walks over to Kurt's bed to see the boy curled up, protecting his body with his arms, a grimace on his face and a sheen glistening of sweat on his brow. He whimpers once again, and Blaine whispers, “Kurt, wake up, come on, Kurt, you're okay, it's just a nightmare.” Blaine gently nudges Kurt, trying to wake the boy up but does not want to frighten his roommate.

    It takes Blaine five minutes before Kurt wakes with a start, wild, panicky eyes searching around the room. Kurt's breathing is heavy and Blaine knows that he's on the verge of some type of panic attack, as Blaine remembers those all too well from his own past. “It's okay, Kurt, you're okay. You're at Dalton in our dorm. You're safe,” Blaine says, reaching out to comfort Kurt, who winces at Blaine's approaching arm, making the boy retreat.

    It takes Kurt a while to calm down, but when he does, he writes, I'm sorry. Blaine almost feels like his heart is actually breaking at the sight of the broken boy in front of him. Kurt is looking up at him with big, apologetic eyes and a guilty look on his face, and Blaine just wants to keep Kurt safe for the rest of his life.

“You don't need to apologize, Kurt. It's not your fault,” Blaine says, sitting on the bed next to Kurt. He knows that Kurt doesn't believe him, which makes Blaine feel even worse. “Do you want to talk about it?” Blaine asks, trying to convey to Kurt that he just really wants to help him and that Kurt can trust him with anything.

Kurt shrugs and writes one word on his board. Bullies. Blaine immediately understands and hangs his head, sadly. Blaine thinks of his own past and decides to tell Kurt. Blaine knows that if Kurt knows he's not alone, he'll feel much better and maybe he'll open up a little more to Blaine, something the brunet is really hoping Kurt will do.

“I understand, Kurt,” Blaine says, looking up sorrowfully at Kurt. “I was bullied before I came to Dalton.” Kurt is surprised at this revelation, and the look on his face shows it clearly. Blaine smiles a bittersweet smile and starts to tell his story to Kurt.

“I'd never really fit in at my old school because I was gay. You know, kids would pick on me, tease, me, call me names. But I never really let it get to me, just had it flow over my head. I was a very optimistic person, still am, actually… So my school had this Sadie Hawkins dance, you know, where the girls ask the guys? Well, I knew no girl would ask me, so the only other out guy in the school and I… we decided to go together, just as friends. We just wanted to show everyone that tried to bring us down that we're still standing strong and we have just as much right as them to do anything they can. And we had a great time… until after the dance.” Kurt scoots a little closer to Blaine, realizing that Blaine is getting a little emotional, as he can see tears welling up in the other boy's eyes.

“While we were waiting for my dad to pick us up, some guys, I don't even know their names, came up from behind us and beat the shit out of us. I still remember everything they said about me and how their kicks and punches felt. We both ended up having to go to the hospital… and Conner… Conner ended up with a permanently damaged brain he was hurt so badly. He and his parents moved after that, and I haven't seen him since,” Blaine finishes the story with a few tears falling out of his eyes. Kurt rests his hand on Blaine's shoulder, hoping the motion is a comforting one.

Blaine smiles at Kurt and wipes his eyes. Kurt doesn't know what to do, so he just writes, I'm sorry, on his board. Blaine moves a little closer to Kurt, hoping his presence is a comforting one.

“Don't be sorry, Kurt. It made me stronger. Just like your bullies did to you. You're strong, Kurt. Stronger than I've ever been.” Kurt smiles weakly at Blaine, disbelieving all of the kind words Blaine had just told him. Kurt knows he's not strong. He's week. If Kurt had been stronger he could have fought Karofsky off all those times. And he wouldn't have to cut every time he feels terrible.

Kurt knows he shouldn't do it. He knows that cutting is bad for him and that it's addictive and that if he doesn't watch out, one day he could end up doing god knows what to himself accidentally. But Kurt also knows that cutting helps him. It's Kurt's way of punishing himself for what happened with Karofsky and letting it happen countless times. It helps Kurt find relief in himself and helps him focus on the physical pain and distracts from his whirlwind emotions. And frankly, Kurt just doesn't care enough about himself to stop.

Blaine gets up from Kurt's bed after making sure that he's okay. Kurt lets Blaine know he's going to the bathroom and gets up. He looks at himself in the mirror and is immediately flooded with more feelings of self-hatred. His eyes are puffy and red from crying, his skin is blotchy and pale, and his hair is limp and lifeless. And to top it all off, Blaine, his stunningly gorgeous gay roommate, has seen him like this. Kurt doesn't know if he wants to cut or cry. Probably both.

He grabs his blade, hidden in an empty tissue box below his and Blaine's bathroom sink. He knows it's risky to cut when Blaine is right outside, probably still awake in their dorm room, but Kurt doesn't care. He slashes his forearm, the opposite one from the day before, immediately feeling the relief from the blade. Kurt takes it slowly this time, reveling in the feel of the cool metal against his skin, loving the distraction he gets from watching his warm, red blood drip down his arm. He slits his wrist and forearms slowly, feeling the delicate pull of the blade through his skin, watching as the blood bubbles up and then leaves a trail of red liquid flowing down his arm. Kurt does this until he feels a little better and looks at himself again.

Though he didn't think it possible, Kurt looks worse than he did before. He thinks about his nightmare, the scene replaying in his head.

“Hey, fag!” Kurt hears Karofsky's voice yell from across the hall, and he immediately tenses. Kurt turns around and immediately feels intense cold seize his body. He wipes the freezing purple slushie from his eyes, expecting his tormentors to be gone. When Kurt opens his eyes again, however, Karofsky and his goons are still standing in front of him. “Could you guys just leave, please?”

The group laughs and Kurt tries to make himself as small as possible against the lockers. “We haven't even started, yet, fairy,” Azimio pipes up from his place next to Karofsky. And then all of a sudden, Kurt is pushed into his locker, falling to the ground, and there are feet kicking him in the ribs and stomach and head. He groans and tries to get up, but when one of Karofsky's henchmen pushes him back down he just wraps his arms around himself and tries to protect his frail body.

The group proceeds with their beating, punching and kicking and hitting Kurt until all they hear from him are faint groans and quiet whimpers and one, small “Please, stop.” Kurt can hear several of his bones crack, probably a few ribs and his wrist and nose may be broken. He hears laughter from above him and quietly thanks the heavens when he finally passes out.

When Kurt wakes, he is in an unfamiliar bed. His legs are spread and tied to the bedposts, as well as his arms. He notices that he is naked, but nobody is in the room. He doesn't dare make a sound that would alert his captors of his status of being awake. He struggles against the ropes, but they are tied too tightly for him to do anything. Kurt surveys the room he's being kept in, while trying to figure out a way to break free from his captors.

For one, the bed is huge. The sheets are very smooth and silky, a very deep red color. The ceiling has three cracks in it, one breaking down the middle and two others running along one side. Kurt turns his head to see a nightstand with a lamp and an alarm clock on it, telling Kurt that it is ten past twelve a.m. He's been asleep for seven hours. There are two doors, one probably leading to a different hallway, and the other possibly to a bathroom or closet.

There's a tiny window in one corner, but Kurt can't see enough to be able to know where he is being held captive. The first door opens and Kurt tries pretending to be asleep, but the people who walked in have already noticed he's awake. “Oh, Kurtie!” one of them says in a sing-song voice. Kurt knows it's one of the neanderthals from his school, but had never bothered to learn his name. “Are you ready to have some fun?”

Kurt grimaces and starts yelling, “Help me! Someone, please, I've been--” A hand covers his mouth before he can say anything else. A different football player, another mystery boy, gets in Kurt's face and angrily spits at him.

“Don't scream for help, homo, or we'll have to punish you,” the boy says, and Kurt can feel his breath against his cheek, can smell the boy's odor permeating his space. “And trust me, you don't want that.” The boy takes his hand off Kurt's mouth and smiles wickedly, something Kurt had thought only really happened in movies.

Azimio sets up a camera pointing right at Kurt. “If you do anything wrong, we'll know, Kurt. We have the whole place wired, plus this handy thing,” he says, gesturing to the camera. “Karofsky, you know what to do.”

Karofsky walks up to Kurt and hovers near him on the bed. He'd taken off his clothes, something Kurt hadn't noticed as he was too busy being warned of punishment if he misbehaved. He starts struggling against the ropes and tries getting as far away from Karofsky as he can. “Don't struggle, Kurt,” a neanderthal says, watching the scene play out beside the bed. “You'll only make it worse for yourself.”

Kurt stops tugging on the ropes as he knows it will be futile, especially with all of his attackers in one room. Kurt is humiliated as two more of the males start taking off their clothes and palming themselves, watching the scene play out. Karofsky starts kissing Kurt's clavicle, leaving a trail of sloppy, wet hickies as he moves farther down. He grasps Kurt's flaccid cock in one hand and then seems to get angry when Kurt doesn't get excited.

He slaps Kurt across the face and starts stroking Kurt faster. Kurt feels himself getting excited and feels tears spring into his eyes. He's humiliated by his body's reactions, even though he doesn't want it in any way.

Karofsky laughs and says, “See, fag, you know you love this.” He stops his ministrations and Kurt can feel his penis against his ass.

“No, please, no!” Kurt says, struggling against his binds once again. He starts screaming and crying and pleading, anything to get Karofsky to stop. The boys around him watching the scene laugh and encourage his attacker.

Kurt can only hear the sound of his own screams and the slap of skin on skin after that.

    Kurt stops replaying the scene in his head and immediately grabs his blade again. Knowing he doesn't have enough room on his arms, Kurt lifts up his shirt and starts slicing his stomach, in long, horizontal lines that ooze red liquid, pouring out relief for Kurt. Tears flow down the boy's face as he harms himself, hating himself for how weak he's being. ‘Pull yourself together, Kurt,' he tells himself, accessing his wounds.

    Kurt knows he's going to need to bandage himself up this time, as the bleeding is still steady, although not dripping down his stomach anymore. He opens the cabinet and sees that Blaine has stocked it up with anything they could possibly need, that's not prescription, at least. He reaches for the ace bandage he sees, but the extra pair of readers glasses Blaine has falls out, clattering into the sink.

Shit, Kurt thinks, hoping he hasnt woken Blaine. He quickly wraps his stomach with the

bandage and hears Blaine on the other side of the door.

"Kurt? Are you okay?" he asks. Kurt can hear the concern in his voice and can almost see the way Blaines eyebrows would be furrowed together and he would bite his lip worrying if something was wrong. "Knock once for yes and twice for no."

Kurt knocks once, exhaling in relief when he hears Blaines quiet footsteps going away

from the door. That was too close, he tells himself. He knows hell have to be more careful if he doesnt want Blaine to find out what hes been doing to himself. He cleans off the sink and his blade, putting it back in his hiding spot. He rolls up the rest of the ace bandage as well, trying to make it look as unused as possible. Then, he walks out to his dorm room and onto his bed, falling almost immediately into a fitful sleep.

-/-

The rest of the week passes by uneventfully for Kurt and Blaine. Having both exchanged cell numbers, the boys text almost constantly when not in one anothers presence. Blaine finds he really enjoys Kurts presence in his life and is glad that the boy was placed as his roommate. There are some awkward moments where Blaine says something that makes Kurt tense up. When Blaine asks about it, its almost like he can see Kurt putting up his barriers, ignoring Blaine until the boy stops pestering him to communicate with him. Blaine understands that its hard for Kurt to talk about things sometimes, and he doesnt want to pressure the boy at all, but he also knows that it would be easier for Blaine to stop himself from saying things that upset Kurt if he knew why they upset him.

Kurt, oddly enough, enjoys Blaines presence, too. Hes started letting some of his walls

down around Blaine but never enough for the boy to actually learn any real, substantial information about Kurt. Most of the time they spend in each others presence is spent listening to their respective music, watching movies on Kurts laptops, or just making small talk. Its not much, but its a comfortable enough space for Kurt to be. As with any new friendship, some moments are awkward or tense, especially when Blaine says something that triggers Kurt. Kurt knows that Blaine wouldnt do it if he knew what he was doing, but Kurt cant help closing himself to Blaine, not allowing him to see the confines of his highly guarded heart. He eventually gets over the trigger, and his and Blaines new friendship proceeds as usual. Kurt is glad he has Blaine to help him in his transition into Dalton because his roommate has been a great help.

Kurt has three more nightmares before the end of the week, all of which Blaine helps him through. Kurt cuts after each one, littering his stomach, wrists, and thighs with self-inflicted wounds. He doesn't think Blaine has any suspicions even though he excuses himself after every heart to heart they have after one of his nightmares. Or, at least if Blaine has suspicions, he doesn't confront Kurt about them.

Kurt ended up having a panic attack after a particularly bad nightmare, wherein Kurt re-lived one of Karofsky's rapes. It had been a particularly bad one, and when Blaine woke Kurt up he was not in his dorm room, but rather in the boys' bathroom of McKinley, getting brutally beaten and taken advantage of. He was hyperventilating and rocking himself back and forth and the only way Blaine got him to snap out of it was by singing to him. This time Blaine sang “Somewhere Only We Know,” one of his favorite songs. It seemed to help Kurt relax, and he used Blaine's voice as an anchor, to help steer him out of his panic attack and back into his dorm room at Dalton.

It is now Friday, and Kurt is sitting on his bathroom floor, tears rolling down his face, sobbing into the empty bathroom, blade in his right hand. He'd just gotten a text from his father telling him he'd have to cancel their Friday night dinner because of work.

Kurt knows that his father needs to work to be able to provide for Kurt, and he loves his father dearly, but Friday night dinners had always been something incredibly special to Kurt. His mom had been the person to start the tradition at the Hummel house and Kurt had done his best to get in as much that he could to keep her memory living in both his and his father's hearts. Add that to the fact that Kurt hadn't gotten to see his father since Sunday and therefore missed him terribly, Kurt just broke. He'd had a particularly stressful day in school, with Sebastian sending him hate glares every time he saw him and quizzes in three out of his five classes.

The teachers at Dalton were no doubt more qualified than those at McKinley, and Kurt did enjoy his classes, but the work load was much heavier and with all of the emotional duress Kurt is already under, he finds it hard to concentrate sometimes.

And still not being completely comfortable with all of the very outgoing boys at Dalton, Kurt is feeling very stressed out, and very left out. He hasn't made any friends except for Blaine, and Kurt doesn't even know if Blaine likes him enough to even call him that. He knows that he should trust Blaine more and that he shouldn't always close up around Blaine, but he can't help it. And that makes Kurt very, very guilty.

Kurt is constantly terrified that he's going to turn a corner and Karofsky will be right there, waiting for him, ready to pounce. He's constantly worrying that Karofsky will find out where he is and ruin the safe haven that he's found in Dalton. Kurt is horrified that Karofsky will somehow find a way to make his life a hellish nightmare once again.

He starts of hitting and scratching himself. The acts of physically beating himself up had always comforted Kurt somehow, although he didn't know why. He hit his arms and his thighs and scratched up his stomach, leaving long, red, angry lines. He cries out as he hits himself, letting all of his anger flow into his hits, hurting himself with strength he didn't know he had. He takes his blade and drags is back and forth along his wrists, forearms, stomach, and thighs. His breathing starts to escalate, and before he knows it, Kurt's having a full-blown anxiety attack. His body is covered in cuts and he's dripping blood everywhere. Frankly, Kurt just doesn't care and loud, wet sobs wrack through his body, making it physically ache. He's so involved with his self-harm and his panic attack that he doesn't hear the door to his dorm open.

Blaine opens the door to his dorm room and immediately hears Kurt's loud cries and heavy breathing from the bathroom. His throws his bag and blazer onto his bed before quickly going to the door. “Kurt?!” He yells through the door, trying to get it open. Of course the door is locked, but that doesn't stop Blaine from trying to open it. He hears the sobs wracking through Kurt's body and grows increasingly worried as he hears something that sounds like a body slamming against the wall. “Kurt, open this door!” Blaine yells, knocking on the door, hitting it, jiggling the doorknob in earnest trying to get it open. He's afraid of what Kurt is doing to himself, having to idea what thoughts are going through Kurt's mind. “Kurt, can you hear me?”

Blaine gets no answer, and becomes even more frantic. He knows Kurt had had a hard time adjusting to life at Dalton and that he had missed his father as well. They had had a conversation about Burt when Blaine had asked about Kurt's family two days ago. Blaine loved that Kurt had such a supportive and loving dad, even if Kurt couldn't see that himself. Blaine knew Kurt saw himself as worthless and unlovable, which is why he tried his hardest to make Kurt believe him when he said that Kurt is one of the most amazing people Blaine has ever met.

Blaine had fallen for Kurt, and fast. He knew that looking for a relationship in Kurt was not the right thing to do, as Kurt was broken and still needed to stabilize himself and his life and was not ready for a relationship, as least not with Blaine. Blaine desperately wished for Kurt to be ready, but there was no way he could just force Kurt into healing faster, and there was no way he would want to. Blaine knew the healing process was a long and slow one and delicate for every different person. It's just that Kurt is so perfect and amazing and wonderful and strong and charming and kind and lovable that Blaine couldn't help falling for the boy. He wouldn't say he was in love just yet, but there was definitely something there.

Kurt hears Blaine's voice outside the bathroom door, but it doesn't really register to him that Blaine is right outside the door. He's hyperventilating and crying big snotty tears and slamming his body into the wall and cutting wherever he can find. He thinks about his dad and Blaine and his transfer to Dalton and Sebastian and Karofsky and it's all too much. He lets all of his emotions out in his tears and blood.

Blaine scrambles in his and Kurt's room, looking for a bobby pin or a safety pin or something. He's freaking out about Kurt, worrying about the cries he can hear coming from the boy, the loud sobs and the huge intakes of breath, and the slamming on the walls. He needs to know what's happening, get into that bathroom, and help Kurt. He finally succeeds in his search after a stressful two minutes and uses a technique he learned from Thad to pick the lock of the bathroom door with a safety pin. His hands are shaking and he fails to successfully pick the lock multiple times. After using a colorfully worded vocabulary, Blaine calms down enough to start slowly picking the lock. Kurt does not stop sobbing and crying and Blaine is trying as fast as he can to pick the lock, so he can get in there and help Kurt. He's so worried he doesn't even register anything else but Kurt and how much his roommate, this perfect boy, is in need of him. And after a grueling five minutes, Blaine ends up getting the door unlocked.

And with all the might he can muster, Blaine pushes the door open.

-/-

A/N: Kind of a cliffie, eh, I guess.

I hope you liked this chapter! I'm liking what I did to it much better than the last story, and I hope you do, too!

Please, please, please review, I love getting feedback from you guys! And please, tell me if you have any questions, or need something clarified, or have constructive criticism, those are all welcome as well!