To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: Here we go...

Hi! I'm here in Belgium safe and as sound as I could be (Joy sneaked a guy back to the room). It is freezing here just now!! I had to go buy a cheesy novelty hat to keep my ears warm....it's a minion hat Kurt! A minion!! I kind of miss you...is that weird? Considering we hadn't seen each other for five years?! Probably! But I do, it's like I'm in a brighter world now and not being in New York near you and Santana is so beige..... I'm being dramatic aren't I?? Okay! I just imagined your patented eye roll so moving on. Question 1! What has been your most proud achievement in the last five years?

Talk soon bumble!

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: Minion?!

Hello there! I hope you are having an okay day (void of a lot of naked lady parts haha!) I hope you realise I only know what a minion is because I have a 4 year old nephew.....what is your excuse?? As for missing me, it's not weird. Well it probably is but I miss you too and so does Santana....she says hi and can you bring her back a real Belgium chocolate? Also my most proud moment would have to be getting turned down by NYADA again.....just hear me out! I had to pick myself up and decide a new dream for myself and really focus on me to come out the other side happy and confident....there was days I wanted to give up but I didn't and now I'm in my dream job really! What about you? Also my question is what was the best night out you've had?

Don't freeze your ass off its too cute ;) peachy

To: Kurt

From: Santana

Subject: Flirty?!

Just wanted to inform you we have no coffee in the apartment.....also I happened to stumble across your emails and I have to say...flirty much?!?!?!?!?!? Don't freeze your ass off its too cute???? Gag barf gag.... Anyway I'm going out with Mrs B tonight cya in the morning J xox

To: Santana

From: Kurt

Subject: Creeper?!

I got coffee on the way to work.....WHAT do you mean you stumbled across them?! My laptop was off and password protected in the locked drawer in my desk! Put it back!! Xox

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: Frozen ass....

I'm afraid it might never get any feeling back. I slipped on a patch of ice and skidded down the side walk L Minions are the cutest Kurt! Erm that's kind of a combined answer for me....I just think it might scare you! My most memorable night out would be the night I went out sober for the first time and didn't feel sad. My proudest moment would be when I received my first chip at AA. I have never been as proud of myself as I was in that moment! 3 years on I'm still sober so it works for me. If you don't want to talk to me any more I get it.

Bumble

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: CRAZY!!!

Of course I want to talk to you! I am so proud of you for telling me! And for achieving that is amazing Blaine! You have overcome a problem and still manage to live your life and not let it define you! It's a brave thing! Don't ever be afraid to tell me things! What made you decide to stop though? Peachy <3

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: RE: CRAZY!!

I just know it can scare people off.... I've not had any boyfriends since then and I find it hard to trust new people. I had a bit of an accident with a glass window on a night out and when I woke up in the hospital I just decided that I couldn't keep hitting self-destruct anymore, I phoned up a local AA place and started meeting with a sponsor once a week. It was hard but I came out the other side and I only go to meetings when I find it hard. We can talk about it more if you want to when I'm back....thank you for saying all of those nice things even if I don't deserve them.... How is Landin? I'd love to meet him again one day and make a better impression. Bumble <3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: Landin

You are a very deserving person Blaine! Don't ever forget that....Kurt Hummel only has the most amazing friends and you are treasured by everyone that really knows you! Landin is great! Back home with his Daddies meaning that I can now have a life and not have to be home for a set time (I love him but kids twenty four seven are hard work!) They are not so impressed that Mrs B let him watch the exorcist however.....Dale says hi and he would love to catch up when you're back in town? Santana says 'did you get her vodka from that place?' she said you would understand...but if it's hard to do it then don't! If you want me to find you a nice boyfriend all you have to do is ask??? <3

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: No chance

You are not setting me up!!! I still have nightmares from when we were younger!!

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: ps

Tell Dale yes, I would love that and I got Santana's vodka as promised....I always deliver ;)

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: Below the belt

Excuse you!! I am a great match maker thank you very much! Sure I set you up with Terri....but we were 11......I didn't know you didn't like girls!!!! Besides playing moms and dads hardly counts as a date does it?! Just tell me what your dream type would be and I will go on a man hunt for you....see how good a friend I can be?! Torturing myself for hours on end to find you a nice guy.....;) <3

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: Samaritan?

Oh sure it will be hard for you looking at attractive men...... gouge your eyes out material I'm sure! Also for the record Terri showed me where her baby would come from! EWWW! That is lady parts Kurt!! That's what maybe made me gay......I owe it all to you! Got to go the gang are going out on a camping trip (It's not as cold here in Portugal) and I will be out of civilisation for a few days! <3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: lions and tiger and bears...

Oh my!! Don't get eaten alive Bee.... At one with nature you are! SEE what I did there? I made a star wars reference! Your impressed don't deny it! Also that is called her vagina, are you still 11? And that is where babies come from....that's where you came from at one point! Ill take credit for making you gay...but only due to my beautiful face and quick wit ;) Get that man list to me ASAP I'm ready to go on a mission for you! <3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: important!!!!

Also if in danger Morse code for S.O.S is: dot-dot dash-dash dot-dot (or so Landin tells me)

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: Yoda....

You hate star wars?!? But that was cute, I could almost imagine you saying it out loud before jumping around proud of yourself! Of course your face is like the sun and moon and stars all at once.....breathe taking.

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: RE: Yoda....

I'm full of surprises......or haven't you learned that yet? <3

To: Kurt

From: Santana

Subject: Get a life!!

Just a quick message to say why are you finding Blaine a boy toy?! And also get a life! As much as I love Landin if you two were intimate that would be wrong and so many different counts of illegal.....go get some! We all discussed it at lunch and agree it's the best course of action! OH! Almost forgot if Kandi appears I moved to Antigua xox

To: Santana

From: Kurt

Subject: WTF!!

Stop hacking my email account and signing me up to feminine hygiene product emails!! I have a life one that is very busy! And another thing Blaine needs confidence what better way than to find him a guy to swoon over him?! And by we you mean you and Dale so you can both bite me......Also I liked Kandi!! She made good muffins.... Xox

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: I'm still standing.....

Bears did not eat me! I really don't think there are any out where we were it was beautiful! Also about the boy hunt....I don't think I'm ready for that.....nobody will want to take on my baggage.... How are things at work? <3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: don't even go there....

I have had the day from hell!! Three dancers got a bug and puked all over there costumes....I had to hand soak them all! Then on my way home I fell down the subway steps and spilt my coffee and now have a black eye! Kill me now!! Also stop changing the subject you said it's been three years? Give me pointers and let me do the rest! <3

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: oh!

Kurt your eye maybe swollen and black

But your eventful day made me crack

Subways are hazardous don't you know

Almost as deadly as ice and snow

Don't be sad you fell in front of the masses

Gay guys are quite used to having sore asses......

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: rudeness

HAHAHA soo funny........still not giving up about this man hunt!

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: Life on the road

Well Mr famous pop star you have been away for a whole month! Do you miss The States yet? I'm not sure where you are right now but just wanted to check in and see how it's going? I've been super busy this week! I got to go into Landin's Pre-school class today and it was so much fun! He was so excited to have me there showing me off to all of his friends. His teacher was telling me how clever he is....Genius in the making! Must take after his uncle Kurt J also that little list still hasn't appeared in my inbox????

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: genius?

I can just imagine you teaching him all sorts of things! Maybe I can teach him about the doctor and x-men?! Such important things a boy must know!! I'm in Spain just now (Uno café con leche...white coffee is all I've learned haha) it's not hot but not cold a nice medium and lots of trendy dressers......you would love it! Oh it must have gotten lost.....<3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Blaaaaaaaiiiiiinnnnnneeeeeee

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Tttteeeeeeeelllllllllll meeeeeeeeee

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

I won't quit you know

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

I'm waiting

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Could do this all day

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Well........................................

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Tell

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Me

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Now

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Blaine

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Devon

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

Anderson......

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: tell me

I'll set Santana on you!

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject:

What happened to your five questions??

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: fun

This is more fun! So come on!!!

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: grrrrr

Fine I'll tell you but you have to let them know I don't drink in advance so it's not awkward on the date....not that I think you will find me one.....

1. Nice eyes

2. Good fashion sense

3. Funny/good sense of humour

4. Likes music and theatre

5. Believes in romance (not even big gestures....just the basics flowers for no reason, a walk in the park...)

6. This is the big one.......wants kids or to settle down.

May the force be with you young Jedi <3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: challenge accepted....

Your wishes are my command J busy the rest of this week so might not have time to text a lot <3

To: Kurt

From: Santana

Subject: Oh game changer...

Just to say, that list kind of describes you...... oh and we are out of lube ;) xox

To: Santana

From: Kurt

Subject: New roommate

STOP READING MY EMAILS!!!! And I haven't used lube....buy your own essentials! Ewww I just pictured you using it L xox

To: Kurt

From: Santana

Subject: Password

Change your password then..... Gaga is far too easy to guess! Also you might not want to use the kitchen table until I clean it..... Don't hate the player hate the game! Xox

To: Santana

From: Kurt

Subject gag

Could you not have told me that BEFORE I had breakfast?!?! I am never touching that table again!! Xox

To: Kurt

From: Dale

Subject: hi

I have to say that list does describe you.....Santana sent it to me, why not just go on the date and surprise him?? It's like a modern day fairy tale. Xx

To: Dale

From: Kurt

Subject: disowned

I swear you two are the worst best friends ever!! I don't know why I talk to you both....it's just a description of any gay guy in theatre really....oh I totally know who to choose now! See you on Saturday xx

To: Kurt

From: Dale

Subject: shutting up

I have a gorgeous almost five years old that you love dearly J also I'm pretty to look at..... But I will drop it even if I think your being silly J but enough said! Yeah Landin wants a sleep over if that's ok? Xx

To: Dale

From: Kurt

Subject: Thanks

Conceited much?? Tell Landin of course he can stay....him I love! You I can give or take! Xx

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: wanderer returns...

Hi just a heads up we are flying home a couple of days early.... Getting in on Thursday morning, if you're free? I need the Intel on this blind date of mine? <3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: Callum

Oh I'm working late that day and then have a few meetings on the Friday...Saturday brunch? Blind date AKA Callum is free on Friday though if you want me to set it up? Also telling you too much is cheating! <3

To: Kurt

From: Blaine

Subject: Argh

Okay Friday it is.....just a few pointers?? No more than you told him about me..... <3

To: Blaine

From: Kurt

Subject: relax

I know you! Don't be nervous he will love you..... His name is Callum, he is 26, has amazing green eyes...loves vogue, is a dancer on my show and doesn't drink either (Came from a very religious house hold) he tells the most hilarious jokes ever and his last boyfriend was a year ago (were together 2 years). That's all you're getting. He says that's fine and I gave him your number to arrange a time and place....have a good last couple of days! See you Saturday if it goes well your buying <3