"Uncle Blaine? Someones at the door!" Landin yells as loud as he can from in front of the TV, not bothering to get up.

"Well answer it then!" I shout back as best as I can with my head checking the food inside the oven.

"Uncle Kurt said not to open the door to strangers..." He screams again before I hear the volume being put up slightly louder on the TV. I sigh heavily as I scrabble up from the oven to go and open the door.

It was fun but definitely hard work having Landin for a whole week by myself, especially since his seven year old brain was never short of a witty response to get him out of doing something he didnt want to do. The start of October had come with a lot to be thankful for, Kurt and I were finally getting back on track, Santana and Maya had eventually decided to give it another go, Lydias first birthday had come and gone with endless amounts of presents and family members cooing over her, I had been doing well in my AA meetings and Santana had been offered a one night only set at some casino in Las Vegas. This had meant everyone had taken off for the week leaving Landin and I to get ready for an ultimate weekend of geeking out at Comic Con. I dont know who was looking forward to it more, possibly me. As much as having my nephew to myself was great...getting eyed up by single - and married mothers - in the playground before school (normally with some form of breakfast food stuck to my trousers) was not as fun as I thought it would be. We werent expecting company, as most of our New York family and friends were in the state of Nevada, no doubt filled to the brim with all you can eat buffets and champagne, so I was surprised by the face standing in front of me when I opened the door.

"Are you gonna stand there gawking or can your future father in law come in?" Burt asked with a smirk before I was jolted into action, taking his bag and moving to one side to let him in.

"Kurt called you..." I say accusingly and I see him grimace under my gaze.

"Grandpa Burt!" Landins squeal stops the conversation going any further as he launches himself into Burts arms.

"Hey buddy! Youve gotten so big! Youll be taller than Uncle Blaine soon-"

"Hey!" I yelp in protest, earning a huge chuckle from Landin. "Im not that small..." I mumble under my breath.

"Aunty Tan says you are the tiniest hobbit in all the land!" Landin giggles, squeezing Burts face against his.

"Well you wont want to come with me to meet the Avengers tomorrow then, huh?" I raise my eyebrow at him and poke at his side, earning me yet another happy squeal.

"No! I have to get Thors phone number for Uncle Kurt!" This time its Burt that bursts into a fit of laughter as he places Landin back on the ground.

"Kid you better hush or you wont get to see them at all..." Burt chuckles as Landin runs into the kitchen, avoiding my foot aimed at his ass.

"Yes I will....Im too cute for words...." He imitates me loudly from within the kitchen and I hear the scraping of a chair. "Im ready for my pizzaaaaaaaaa!" He shouts sweetly before Burt and I share a look of amusement and head after him.

Nothing more is said about why Burt has turned up as we eat dinner and Landin entertains us with the drama that is second grade. (Someone had to get sweets cut out of their hair that day). Nothing is mentioned as we sit watching some God awful animated cartoon. Nothing is said as we play submarine deep sea divers at Landins bath time or as we make our own fairytale adventure. Then it happens. We are sitting on opposite ends of the couch watching extreme truckers in silence before Burt turns off the television and shifts his body to face me with that look. That Burt Hummel tell me how youre feeling look.

"So....." Burt says softly, turning his whole body round to face me. "Whats new with you?"

"Not much.....AA meetings, therapy sessions, work... behaving like a good recovering alcoholic. But you already know all that, dont you?" I say jokingly but I should know better than to make light of things in front of the child/adult whisperer that is Burt Hummel.

"Blaine...You should know by now that none of us judge you for anything you do." Burt says softly. "Youre still young, heck Im old and still make mistakes! Everyone needs a little help from time to time."

"So Kurt did send you to check up on me?" I ask, already knowing the answer.

"Kurt didnt send me to do anything." Burt starts, but stops as I huff out a little breath. "Okay so he may have felt a little guilty leaving you to go and party BUT I decided to come on my own. Youre family kid, whether you like it or not and I felt like you might want a chat."

"He doesnt need to feel guilty about leaving me here." I sigh in agitation. "I told him to go! This is a big thing for Santana and its my own fault Im not strong enough to be around that sort of environment yet. He shouldnt miss out because of my insecurities...." I say as quietly as I can, aware of the seven year old currently taking up residence across half of my bed.

"Blaine you have to stop thinking of your problems as your own." Burt says sternly and I furrow my brow a bit in confusion. "You and Kurt are engaged! A marriage is about loving each other equally, its about supporting each other in times of need and its about trusting each other enough to be completely honest. Your problems are Kurts problems and vice versa. You dont need to hide how you feel from him because he isnt going anywhere. EVER." Im trying not to cry, but my body seems to not care what I want as the tears start to pool in my eyes anyway.

"I know that deep down, I do. I really do, but it doesnt stop the part of me that wants to protect him." I take a deep breath to centre my thoughts. "Ive already hurt him enough. Dont try and say I didnt, because I have. Watching him withdraw and become unsure of himself killed me! I dont want him to worry about me any more, I just want him to feel loved. I want us to get married and have babies, lots of babies, hundreds if thats want he wants. I just want him to realise that I wont break, Im not this ticking time bomb that could go off any minute, you know? I want him to have that perfect marriage he saw you and his mom have, like the one you and Carole have now."

"Can I tell you a story?" Burt asks smiling and I know Im about to be schooled like a Sesame Street episode. Giving in to my fate I nod to show he can continue. "When I first met Kurts mom, she...how can I phrase this nicely....she was trouble."

"What kind of trouble?" I ask in confusion because the Elizabeth Hummel I remember was an angel that gave you cookies even if you didnt eat all your veg and sang you silly made up songs for everyday mundane tasks.

"She enjoyed the company of the opposite sex....." My jaw dropped slightly and Burt chuckled. "Dont look so shocked kid, I was young with urges once too....but when I met Lizzy on the courtyard that day something in me changed. It was like my whole existence couldnt continue unless she was there. I told her as much too-"

"And she told you to prove it before demanding to pay for your first date, you used to tell us this story when we were little." I say strongly but Burt shakes his head.

"Blaine you should know by now that adults change stories to make them more child appropriate..." Now Im thoroughly confused. "Lizzy didnt tell me to prove it that day, in fact she went out with my best friend instead - well, who I thought was my best friend at that point in time - So instead I sat it out, became her friend. We ran in the same circle since that day because they were dating and I never forced it. I let her come to me and I was right to because no matter where we were or who was there she would always end up by my side, talking about stupid things. Who was the better Rolling Stone, what was the best flavour chips, without even trying I became her best friend. After a few months we were inseparable. Any free time -without her boyfriend of course - was spent with me spinning stories and trying to right all the worlds injustices from that stupid fountain."

I just sit there in awe of how different this story was to the one they would always tell us as we grew up. The big love story that I fantasised for myself hadnt ever happened the way I thought it had. Did Kurt know about this?

"I never pushed for more, I thought she was happy and loving someone means you want them to be happy. Even if its not with you. But then about five months after we first met, she kissed me, I was so shocked I didnt kiss back." He laughs, recalling his first love. "Then she slapped me, that was the only time she ever did and I just grinned at her for what felt like hours before she told me where we were going for our first official date and ensuring I knew she would be paying. That was my Lizzy, stubborn, independent and with the biggest heart you could imagine...."

"Burt that- I dont get why you never just told us that story when we were little? Its still a romantic story, true love still won..."

"Well you see....a few weeks later she came to me sobbing. She thought she was pregnant....but for me to have been the biological father it would have been an immaculate conception..." He trails off, watching as my brain catches up with what hes saying.

"Oh..."

"The guy she had been dating before me didnt care and she was terrified of doing it alone, her parents would have disowned her, they werent as mellow back then. Most importantly though she wanted us to break up. She said she couldnt cope with me knowing what a huge mistake she had made, that she wished she had waited for me to be her first and that she couldnt live with putting me through all the pain..."

"So youre not Kurts real dad?" I ask in a whisper, really not wanting to know the answer either way.

"Of course I am! This was eight years before Kurt was born!" Burt says, placing a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "It took a week for me to get up the courage, but I went and knocked on her door and was waiting on one knee - with a candy ring - when she opened it. She cried of course before saying yes, then we went to the doctor and it turned out she wasnt pregnant but we still got married four months later." Burt says happily.

"I think I need your conclusion.....I have no idea what message youre trying to send me..." I say slightly dazed by all this new information.

"That you cant keep letting your relapse define you. If I had just let Lizzy go back then I would never have got Kurt. You wouldnt have found your soul mate. I would have let her move on if I thought it was what she really wanted but I knew how she felt about me too. That connection, that great love? It only happens once in your lifetime and thats only if youre lucky!" Burt says with a smile playing on his lips. "I knew that I wanted to be with her more than anything else and I told her if she was pregnant that the baby would be mine, no questions asked. I was willing to bring up another mans child if it meant getting to immerse myself in her presence for the rest of my life. Thats what true love is...putting your partners needs before your own and I know you understand that because I see the same connection with you and Kurt! So stop throwing a pity party and start living! You only get one shot at life, nobody knows when it will be snatched away from them either. Im just thankful I got sixteen years of amazing memories before we had to part ways. You however? Are going to live a long happy life with my son who - just in case you didnt know - loves you with every fibre of his being. That means he needs you as much as you need him. So you really need to stop thinking youre a disappointment Blaine because nobody thinks that. Kurt doesnt think that. You have to stop wanting that perfect relationship because nothing and no one is truly perfect. Its just that loving someone means you dont see their flaws as anything other than something to make you love them even more. Watching them face their fears and change their own paths makes you love them even more than you thought was possible." Burt finishes with a huge grin and I can feel the dam break as tears flow freely down my face.

"Burt?"

"Yeah kid?"

"Your advice is always appreciated...but can I have a bear hug to go with it?" I ask timidly, afraid he might be creeped out by his grown up future son in law requesting a cuddle.

"Like you even have to ask!" Burt smiles before pulling me into the best cuddle ever. Burt Hummel. Super Dad!

************************

"Hummel stop checking your phone or I will make your sex picture go viral!" Santana screams across the table at me. I quickly check my messages again just in case before securely hiding my phone in my pocket.

"Sorry I just thought Blaine would have called or text me..." I mumble, taking another sip of my cocktail.

"He called us earlier..." Jake slurs as Dale buries into his neck. "....Well technically Landin called and then Blaine came on at the end.... Fuck Dale! Hes not happy that Landin got you Thors autograph!" Jake laughs before downing a shot.

"I just thought he might need to...discuss his surprise..." I mumble to myself but Cooper squeezes his face in beside me, distracting me from my thoughts, his nose squashing against my cheek.

"He wont be sad, Burts there...Burts awesomeness! He says really clever things." He shouts a little louder than necessary right into my ear.

"What if he thinks its because I dont trust him?" I ask seriously before Finns giant hand lands across my face.

"Dont worry, Burt makes everything better! Like....like..." Finn stumbles on his thoughts before Dale pipes in, still buried in the crook of his husbands neck.

"LIKE SEX WITH NO CHILDREN!" Jake laughs hard at the statement. "YOU DONT NEED TO BE QUIET OR ANYTHING!" He cant continue as Jake devours his mouth, ignoring catcalls from everyone else.

"Are they going to have sex on the table?" Finn asks with wide eyes as they slide into a lying position, still with his hand firmly on my face, meaning I can only see through one eye.

"I hope they do!" Cooper bounces against me in excitement.

"Cooper! Youre the straight brother!" I say with a giggle. "I wish the gay brother was here!" I pout thinking about Blaine, in our bed, all warm and rosy cheeked after a shower where we-

"Dude! Stop having fantasies!" Finn recoiled in horror, mumbling about going to the bar and not wanting to feel his brothers hard on next to him as he leaves the table.

"Kurt hes even more dramatic than you!" Santana giggled, spooning the other side of Cooper. "Loves a Cooper sandwich, so much better than a Blaine sandwich! At least my boobs get some action from time to time..." She sighs happily, dropping an arm around both of our shoulders.

"Santana do you need a water?" I ask in concern for her blood to alcohol ratio. This was our last night in Vegas and after spending the day at the casino; Gambling (Cooper and Finn), Eating (Santana and Dale) and shopping in the gift shops (Jake and I) we had all partaken in a very boozy dinner which turned into a very boozy hotel room party before getting to the night club. A big perk and also big downfall to being with a celebrity... (Well, two if you counted Cooper), was that the club promoters plied you with alcohol constantly. This night would definitely be one to remember, its just a shame none of us probably would.

"Fuck no!" She wails in disgust as Cooper tries to booty shake to the song that is pulsing from the speakers. "You could let me do a body shot off you?" She looks hopeful in my direction with a huge grin on her face.

"I will!" Cooper screeches in my ear, causing it to ring for a few seconds. Giving my head a shake I notice Santana standing up on the chair before turning to get her ass right in Coopers face before pulling up her dress.

"Hummels bitch....see? Not Coopers!" The raven haired girl yells over her shoulder, trying to point her index finger at the tattoo.

"Santana sit down! People will take pictures!" I snarl, pulling her back into the seat. Dale and Jake have managed to pry themselves apart long enough to at least look disgruntled at Santanas display.

"I never managed to read it!" Cooper says seriously, looking genuinely upset, before waving over a hostess carrying a tray of tequila. "Show me again!"

"No! My ass is all for Peachy! He appreciates all asses!" She says, clapping her hands as the drinks are set onto the table.

"Not if they are attached to vaginas!" Jake laughs and Dale squeals beside him.

"You said vagina!" Dale whispers. Well it would have been a whisper two bottles of champagne ago.

"I did!" Jake giggles. "VAGINA! VAGINA! V.A....V.A.S...How do you spell it?!" He screams as loudly as he can, earning a few funny looks from the girls in a booth behind him.

"He likes mine!" Santana declares, pointing her finger dangerously close to my eye. "Dont you Kurt? Maya likes it too!"

"Nooooo!" I shake my head, making little stars appear in my eyes. "I only like Blaines penis! Nobody elses or vaginas!"

"Bro!" Finn whines as he reappears beside me, two girls following him with a huge goblet, putting it on the table.

"He said penis! Time out!" Dale says in his daddy voice which sends me, Santana and Cooper into a fit of uncontrollable laughter, only stopping when Cooper falls off of his chair.

"Finn whats that?" I ask, realising we have a prop that could have been stolen from a Harry Potter film set towering above us and no one else has even questioned it.

"Its from these guys at the bar, they called me handsome!" Finn says proudly. "What?" He asks as we all stare at him in awe.

"You got cruised by gay guys...." Jake says seriously frowning deeply before bursting into laughter. 

"And you let them buy you a drink?" Cooper cackles trying to compose himself enough to sit back on his chair.

"Cuál está en él?" Santana asks, trying to lean up enough to look inside.

"Fuck shes speaking Spanish..." Dale states trying to get a look too. "I hate when she speaks Spanish...."

"Whats in it?" I ask, joining them in their quest to peek over the top.

"I dunno, they just said we had to try it! Its called the goblet of tyres?" He thinks aloud. "No fire! The goblet of fire!"

"Deja para comer la tostada!" Santana squeals next to me, but Im sure thats not what she wanted to say.

"Lets eat toast?" I ask her and she shakes her head before mimicking raising a glass in her hand. "OH! Lets make a toast!" Santana nods and pulls Cooper up beside us as Dale does the same to Jake.

"To our superstar!" I say, pretending to hold a glass in my hand.

"To sex without children!" Dale says, copying my action.

"To getting hit on!" Finn screams next.

"Heres to.....to freedom!" Cooper salutes.

"Heres to.....Friends!" Jake giggles.

"Aquí está a ..... Vegas cabrones!" Santana hollers before we all dive into the magical drink, which burns our throats on the way down. None of us worrying about the hangovers that would appear in its wake.

************************

"Im dying! Im dead!" Groans Cooper, making me jolt awake in fright. Im not quite sure how I ended up in bed with my future brother in law. Never mind a future brother in law with only boxers on.

"Youre not but you will be if you dont shut the fuck up!" Santanas head pops up in front of my face where it is lying on Coopers chest. "Hurt head, need food." She whispers through a hoarse voice, planting her head beside mine.

"In English?" I ask wittily and then regret the laugh I have as my eyeballs try to escape from my head.

"I want food. I dont like hangovers." She says shortly before closing her eyes again.

"Why are we all in my bed?" Cooper asks above me as he takes in our surroundings. I decide its too much effort and close my eyes again to try and piece together what happened. "Why do you have Kurts shirt on?" I hear him ask Santana and when I open my eyes and look down I realise I only have my briefs on too...what the hell did we do last night? Santana puts her hand back under the cover and feels around.

"Thats all I have on..." She grins and then smacks cooper hard across the cheek. "Move that hand or lose it!" Seriously what did we do?!

I remember the goblet, then Santana started to speak in Spanish. We must have got food from somewhere as I have a very distinct memory of Dale stripping and Finn paying him in a variety of burgers. There might have been more drink and maybe a giant parrot? No, that had to have been a dream. I cant really remember why we were in bed together though, that was a bit of a worry.

"I sure didnt expect to have a story that would start, so this one time I ended up in bed with my brother in law and lesbian best friend...." I mumble, not really worried about the situation as Im warm and comfortable in my current position.

"Well at least we didnt have sex....my ass isnt sore!" Cooper says loudly, causing Santana to hit him again.

"Seriously old man, I will end you!" Her voice drips with venom but I think over Coopers statement.

"Its not all about whos fucking who up the ass! We do other things as well...."

"Too early and too dead to make a funny!" Cooper whines a little quieter than he had before as Santanas hand dangles dangerously over his crotch. My phone starts to ring and I answer without even looking at the screen.

"This phone belongs to Kurt Hummel may he rest in peace..." I croak.

"Thats not funny! Dad would freak if he heard that!" Finn whispers down the phone. "Where are you?"

"Im in Coopers room, so is Santana....wait why are you whispering?" I ask a little louder and Santana swats at my head.

"Why arent you?" Her voice is harsh and I know its best not to mess with her.

"Im in Jake and Dales room...."

"Why did you end up in there?" I ask, amused at how panicked Finn sounds.

"I dont know, do I?!" He yelps and then theres muffled sounds of sheets rustling in the background. "Oh shit..."

"Finn? Where exactly are you?" I ask, having a feeling I already know.

"Youll laugh at me..."

"No I wont...." I say as sincerely as I can now that Santana and Cooper are both staring at me.

"Im involved in a Porter snuggle session.....they are both naked...." I have to pull the phone away so the laughter doesnt deafen him. Its quickly ended when Santana flicks my forehead.

"Peachy I am this close to going all Uma Thurman - the Kill Bill years -on you." Santana growls. I decide not to call her bluff and quickly pull the phone back up to my ear.

"You said you wouldnt laugh...." Finn moans from the other end.

"Im sorry but you are currently naked in between Jake and Dale...." I say trying to hold the laugh in, I would really like to keep all of my limbs and vital organs on this trip.

"Hold up! Finns naked with the daddies?" Santana pops her head back up again now fully awake.

"No way! This is awesome!" Cooper screams happily.

"Kurt who was that?" Finn asks in my ear.

"Ermmm....Santana and Cooper..." I say shyly now I have blurted out his secret to the loudest member of our group, he would never get to live it down.

"Shit, Rachels going to kill me! Why did you tell them? I wasnt meant to get this drunk... This is all your fault!" He rants amidst some groans and mumbles which can only mean that Jake and Dale are stirring.

"Its not my fault they are right beside me! Just wake your lovers up and come down to Coopers room....well order breakfast?" I say cheerily, hoping he will forgive me for this.

"Fine!" He says after a few moments of deliberation. "But I want extra pancakes and bacon..." And then all thats left is the dial tone as he hangs up on me. Cooper and Santana are now very much alert and very excited at this little revelation.

"Guys you know we cant tell Rachel about this...." I say steadily as they start laughing and bouncing on the bed.

"Like shit we cant! Im going to call her right now." Santana beams looking for her phone and then stopping when her hand catches her eye. "Why the fuck do I have a tacky dice ring on my ring finger?" She says soberly, looking round to show us both by waving it frantically in front of us.

"Relax its just one of those plastic things you get at the little wedding chapel..." Cooper says off handed, picking up the menu for room service. "Im thinking waffles...."

"They only give you one when you get married!" Santana rages. "Oh no, what if I married a bum? What if I married Coop?"

"Las Vegas weddings arent real! Just take it off and nobody will know!" Cooper replies, still calm, reaching for the room phone to dial in the order when Santana slams it back down in a panic. "Hey! I need food to throw back up in an hour..." He whines looking at us both. I try not to panic because surely we would remember going to a wedding chapel to watch our best friends get married. Santana looks up at me with wide eyes and nods towards Cooper.

"They are real, but Im not arguing that point just now. Cooper...." I ask a little scared to know. "Let me see your left hand?" He sighs and looks at his hand hidden behind Santanas head.

"Oh shit Im wearing a ring! Why the fuck am I wearing a ring?" Cooper babbles bringing it up closer to his face to inspect it. Santana by this point is hyperventilating whilst simultaneously spouting Spanish swear words, which I think may have been used in a threat to cut off parts of Coopers anatomy. So I decide to be the grown up and take charge, and although the copious amounts of shots I no doubt did last night are swirling in my stomach, making me want to heave, I tug Coopers hand into to mine.

"Cooper! Stop freaking out! You can get it annulled easy enough...its - oh!" I stop dead when I realise the ring Cooper has on his hand isnt a tacky plastic one like Santanas. In fact its a very expensive ring...my ring. "Thats my engagement ring." I say half to myself and half to the pair of eyes, watching me carefully. This is the point in time where having articles or paparazzi shots would come in handy. Or even better when you hadnt drunk yourself into amnesia so you could understand exactly what was going on. I look down at my own left hand and feel bile churning to get out.

"Hey bro? Why is there a mug with you and Santanas face on it at the door?" Finn comes barging in, holding the mug carefully in his hands before taking in Cooper, Santana and I frozen in place, looking at the offending jewel currently resting on my hand.

"Whats wrong?" Jake pipes up and I whip my head around, realising everyone is now just staring at me.

"I think I married Santana..."