Landin Alexander Porter, at the age of thirteen, was intelligent. Like, really smart. Everyone told him so, his parents, his uncles and aunties, even crazy Mrs. B admitted he would out smart her old friend from the CIA and then his dad warned her to not talk about it and got all quiet, Landin knows, however that he was more than a ‘friend'. Landin's teachers also tell him he is clever, that he has potential, except for Mr Harker. Who finds all of his corrections irritating (but what good is a history teacher that gets all the vital dates wrong?!) and throws him out of class on a regular basis. The problem still sat, however, that there was one thing Landin couldn't ever quite grasp.

Why his family were so out of this world bonkers. He had always known they were different, it would be hard growing up in this tight unit and not to notice. He had two sets of grandparents, one that belonged to his daddy J and one set he inherited from his uncle Kurt, kids at school thought that was weird. He had two cats for cousins, that he kept hoping to have a telepathic conversation with, but it was yet to happen, when other people counted humans. He also told his uncle Blaine everything, including the embarrassing dream he had about his hot English teacher, but his uncle Blaine found it more embarrassing and squealed about girl parts. His uncle Kurt still plays house with him, solving unsolvable medical cases for hours, not that either of them admit that to anyone else, thank you very much. And Santana and Kurt always say they hate each other, but this one guy slated uncle Kurt's design and aunty Santana threatened to slash his tyres. Which uncle Finn said wasn't the first time and got all weird. But yeah, he was happy, and his family loved him to the moon and back.

They were still mad, and weird and loud, like seriously loud.

 He had always known, but recently his revelations had become stronger as he visited his friends' houses. His best friend Ryan's house, for example.  Ryan's mom and dad were married straight out of school, had seven children, Ryan was the youngest, and lived in an old renovated town house. They went to church every Sunday, took family cycles every second night in the local park and always said grace before dinner. That wasn't what made him think his family were odd, it was how quiet they all were at the dinner table. Like so quiet you could hear a pin drop, Landin had never understood that phrase until that moment, because there was ten of them crammed tightly into the dinner table and not one person spoke. Not even a pass the salt. Every time he visited for dinner it was the same.

Sitting in his favourite ice-cream parlour, while watching his little sister and cousin sing a rap song, and his Daddy D and Uncle Kurt trying to hit each other on the head with sprinkles, and his uncle Blaine turn Willows dessert into a unicorn and then arguing with his Daddy J about them being completely real, he announced this in a confused sigh. Causing all four adults sitting around the booth to look at him dumbfounded.

“What did you say sweetie?” Jake asks, distracted by trying to tuck a napkin into Lydia's dress, much to her disgust.

“Ryan's family.” Landin sighs, scooping some of the mint chocolate chip into his mouth. “They make us look like a circus!”

“I liked the circus when we goed.” Jerrod pipes up from the corner, strawberry sauce dribbling off of his chin, “The clown man kept falling into the pool remember?”

“I wonder if the circus is coming again in spring?” Kurt raises his eye brows at dale.

“Oh, I could ask the guys that do the permits, see if I can score free ticket?” Dale announces to the table, pulling out his phone and dialling a number.

“You know, Burt and Carole - well mainly Burt - keep complaining that they missed it.” Blaine adds, breaking off another piece of wafer for Willow to chew on. “We should see if Rachel, Finn and the kids can get up then too, make a family weekend out of it?”

“Oh! If we do that can we go to the museum?” Jerrod asks brightly. “I told uncle Finn, about the new dinosaur and he said he wants to see something bigger than him.”

“Uncle Finn is like a giant!” Lydia adds, full of endless (or so she thinks) wisdom. “I bet he could touch the top of that big one's head. You know the tie one Jerrod?”

“It's a T-rex Beau!” Landin sighs, rolling his eyes for good measure because this is exactly what he was talking about.

“What were you saying about Ryan's mom honey? I keep meaning to call her about the PTA gossip…” Jake turns his attention to Kurt as he finishes. “Do you know? Apparently Paige's mom had an affair with her Zumba instructor-“

“What's a fair?” Jerrod asks.

“It's where you ride the carousel, member Grandpa Burt took us in Ohio.” Lydia confides to him quietly, so as not to disturb her Daddy D on the phone. “You were sick after I told you not to eat all the candies!”

“DAD!” Landin yells for attention. “They just sit at a table, and eat like normal people. We all shout over each other and go off onto different stories and have food fights and…can't we just be normal?” Jake looks seriously at his son, then towards Kurt and Blaine, ignoring Dale still schmoozing on the phone.

“Okay, let's all be silent from now?” He asks the table and everyone zips their lips. They sit for several minutes until Willow shoots ice out of her nose.

Jerrod starts it, a small giggle just barely audible. Then Lydia joins in, then his uncle Kurt, then uncle Blaine. Then he hears it. The snort his dad J always argues that he does not, ever, make. Landin narrows his eyes. “You just snorted!”

“I thought we weren't allowed to talk?” Jake accuses, narrowing his eyes sarcastically. “I thought you wanted to be normal, like Ryan's family”

“Yeah you said we were a circus. I want to ride a unicorn and do tricks.” Lydia replies to nobody in particular.

“You didn't talk though. You snorted. You always say the noise comes from that rusty pipe in the basement!” Landin replies with sass.

“If you're talking then I am, I have never once, not even during slushy facials. Wanted to be normal.” Kurt sticks his tongue out across the table.

“If he talks so do I, or I never get my own way!” Blaine adds, wiping the ice-cream bubble from Willows nose.

“MO TA!” she squeals in delight.

“I don't like not talking. My inside voice copies what I think…” Jerrod sighs, dramatically.

“OKAY!” Landin yells, silencing his family's squawking. “We can talk; it was pretty boring not talking anyway.”

“Exactly! How can you tell us you're superior in knowledge if you can't talk?” Jake grins, ruffling his hair just out of annoyance, Landin is sure. Landin gestures quickly with his hands as his stunned family watch on.

“Was that sign language?” Kurt and Blaine ask in sync.

“Yeah!” Lydia answers for him. “He knows the sign for the f word too. He showed me last week!”

“No I didn't I showed Ryan!”

“Well, you should have checked your closet, I was hiding in beside the cosy jumpers.” She grins back smugly. “I like to pet them like they're horses!”

“Phone” Jake holds out his hand expectantly, pocketing it as soon as Landin slips it into his grasp. “Try talking to ‘normal Ryan' with no phone!”

“I got the det- wait what have I missed?” Dale asks finally ending his hushed phone call, and taking in his son's sullen expression.

“I wish I had normal parents…” Landin mutters quietly, but not quite enough.

“Well sadly for you…” Dale starts with a knowing grin. “You got us. And we kinda like you, enough to torture till you're eighteen anyway. After that maybe we can review the situation?” Landin laughs, shrugging out of the way as both his dads attack him from either side for a kiss.

“Hey daddy D? you wanna see a sign word?” Lydia pipes as Blaine lunges for her hands. Landin grins, thinking, that although his family is a circus, he wouldn't have them any other way.