15 hours earlier…

Kurt sat at his desk, tapping his pen against his lips in frustration. The words he had in his mind were outright refusing to form proper sentences on the pages before him. Kurt silently cursed whatever sick human being who decided exams were a good idea for someone to finish their High School years with. Leaning back in his chair he sighed. Today was just not his day. It had started out well; the sun had been shining as he made his way to school. He'd gotten to wear his new jeans, his hair, for once in his life had gone right that morning and he had felt he was definitely getting somewhere with Blaine. The night before they'd chatted away on the phone for hours, and Kurt had even sensed some light flirting. Of course the second Blaine felt it was getting too flirty he'd cut in with some loud comment about Maggie. Kurt supposed it was for the sake of Blaine's father. Kurt wouldn't even be surprised if Blaine's father had bugged Blaine's phone.

But despite all that things were looking up. As Kurt walked to school, the sun beating down on his back, he had spotted Blaine waiting outside the gates. The second Blaine saw him his shoulders relaxed and a smile spread across those beautiful lips and in those seconds… in those few seconds, Kurt had felt like he was the single most wonderful and important human being on the planet. Well to Blaine anyway. Kurt had smiled back and just as he had been about to say something, Maggie had appeared from behind Kurt and walked right up to Blaine to plant a kiss right on his lips. And to Kurt's total horror Blaine had kissed her back, wrapping his arms around her skinny waist. Kurt had nearly thrown up on the spot. He'd stalked past the couple, making sure his shoulder hit Maggie's causing her to stumble a little.

"Watch where your going dumbass!" She had exclaimed, brushing some blonde curls from her face. Kurt refrained from giving her the finger.

Thankfully after that Maggie had had to go or she'd be late to McKinley. But Kurt had ignored Blaine all day, every now and again he would turn around to find Blaine watching him but Kurt didn't care. He was in full on sulk mode, Blaine could stare all he wanted he was getting nothing out of Kurt that day.

Kurt laid down his pen. He gave up, he truly did. If he didn't know this shit by now he was never going to know it. The house was quiet. Burt and Carol were out with Finn and Rachel seeing some play Rachel had insisted they just had to see. Kurt had made up some excuse about needing to work so they'd let him be. Sighing Kurt went downstairs to get a drink. It was dark outside, but the stars were bright. A knock at the door woke Kurt from his musings. Picking up his glass of water, Kurt opened the door gingerly.

Blaine stood on his doorstep. A bottle of Bourbon in his hand, he looked a mess. Kurt sensed he was very drunk even before he started talking. And… and oh God, Blaine looked hotter than he ever had before. His shirt was loose around his throat, wisps of chest hair were peeking out over the top, the bottom of his shirt was un-tucked in some places showing off a little of the muscles that dipped down below the waistband of his jeans. Kurt took a deep breath… control… and patience.

"Blaine?" He said carefully.

Blaine looked up at him as if suddenly snapped out of a dream. He opened his mouth. Then closed it. Then opened it again. "She showed me her… boobs." He finally managed to slur out.

"What?" Kurt said, raising his eyebrows. He moved out the way as Blaine pushed his way into Kurt's hallway.

"We was… having… a niiiice little chat… then all of sudden she's taken… her top off." Blaine waved his arms dramatically and leaned in close to Kurt. Kurt could smell the alcohol on his breath. "And lemme tell you summin… Boobs… are weird…" Blaine made a face.

Kurt pressed his lips together, trying desperately not to laugh out loud. Blaine leaned forward and pulled at the front of Kurt's t-shirt.

"Blaine! What are you doing?" Kurt exclaimed, batting his hand away.

Blaine sunk down on the sofa. "See… you don't have… boobs." He said it as though the very word disgusted him. "Your normal… was the point of them anyway… jus'… balls of… fat really."

Kurt sensed an opportunity. He sat down next to Blaine and rested a hand on his shoulder. "Blaine… do you know why you're having these feelings?" Kurt said the words slowly, holding Blaine's eye contacted.

Blaine looked at him with such heavy grief in his eyes; it almost broke Kurt's heart on the spot. "Because… I'm… wrong… I came out wrong… I'm… no… natural."

Kurt squeezed Blaine's shoulder. That was what Blaine believed? That he was wrong? And unnatural? This was what Blaine had been conditioned to believe. Jesus Christ, thought Kurt, why did he have to be attracted to such a fuck up?

"Blaine, your not unnatural, your not wrong… Its unnatural that you hide from your true self… its wrong that people have made you believe you can't be who you are." Kurt shook Blaine's shoulder lightly. "Your… perfect Blaine, just the way you are and you do not need to ever change for people, because there are people who… people… who love you Blaine, no matter who you choose to be." Me. Kurt's head whispered silently. Me. I love you. Wake up Blaine. Love me back. Please.

Blaine stared at him for what felt like the millennium. "Drink." He grunted. "You drink now…" He grabbed Kurt's hand. "Get… drunk with me."

Somehow Kurt found himself drinking whatever the hell was in the bottle Blaine had brought and Jesus was it strong. He started to feel dizzy, a warm feeling settling in his stomach. They didn't say anything else to each other, they just drank. Blaine was playing with Kurt's fingers. Kurt held his breath. Was this it? Oh God, he wished Blaine would just hurry up and kiss him already. Want and need was building up in Kurt's stomach like a wild fire. It burned his insides, he needed Blaine… he wanted Blaine. He was fed up of holding back. Blaine was drunk. Kurt was drunk. It was perfect. Kurt wanted to show Blaine what he was missing, what he could have. Kurt leaned forward… Blaine leaned forward… their heads got ever closer. Excitement bubbled in Kurt's stomach and he pushed his head against Blaine's, desperate for the feel of Blaine's lips on his… and promptly head butted Blaine right in the eye. Oh dear. The alcohol had clearly messed with Kurt's special awareness.

"Oh… I'm so… sorry." Kurt giggled. But Blaine didn't laugh. His face was serious… his eyes dozy with alcohol and desire.

"Kiss me." Blaine demanded. The authority in Blaine's voice briefly took Kurt aback. But he didn't need telling twice. He pressed his lips hungrily against Blaine's. The feeling that eschewed threatened to knock both of them to the floor. This… this was right. This was how it was meant to be. How it was always meant to be. A shudder rippled through Blaine's body. Oh. This was what kissing was supposed to feel like, not the dull nothing feeling he had when Maggie pressed her lips against his… this was… this was something else. Fireworks were exploding in his chest and it felt… good. Amazing. A fire had lit in the base of his stomach; it burned brighter and brighter, hotter and hotter until the only thing that calmed the flames was to press himself closer to Kurt's body. Kurt seemed to be experiencing a fire of his own because he gasped softly against Blaine's mouth as they desperately pressed their bodies together. They couldn't get close enough. Blaine's hands were so holding on to Kurt's waist so tightly it was almost painful but Kurt didn't care. He welcomed it. He wanted it.

Kurt couldn't believe this was finally happening. It was everything he had dreamed about, fantasized about… Part of Kurt believed Blaine was about to disappear any second, like this would all be a dream… a dream that Kurt was slightly embarrassed to admit he had had many times… He held on tight to Blaine's shirt, refusing to let this all disappear. Somehow they made it up the stairs, driven by their desire alone… They tripped and fell, stopping half way up the stairs to kiss each other feverishly, before Blaine practically dragged Kurt to the landing.

"Which ones yours?" He slurred, his breathing coming out raggedly. He was nodding his head at the three doors at the top of the stairs. Kurt stared at him. Was this happening? Was this really happening? Blaine wanted to… Go into his bedroom? To do what? Did he want to… dothat? What if he just wanted to talk? The look in his eyes didn't look like he wanted to talk but… it was almost too good to be true.

"The… middle one." Kurt breathed out, his eyes wide. Blaine grabbed Kurt's hand and pulled him into his bedroom. They paused looking at each other from across the room. Their chests rose in sync, up… down… the only sound was their heavy breathing. Blaine could hear his heart beat thundering in his ears. Kurt stood awkwardly. Blaine closed the space between them and pulled Kurt's t-shirt over his head. Kurt suddenly felt embarrassed… he blushed. He looked at Blaine nervously. The fire he saw in Blaine's eyes had him instantly mesmerized. Blaine was looking at Kurt like he was the… sexiest god damned thing Blaine had ever seen in his life. Blaine reached out and ran a finger down the middle of Kurt's chest. Kurt shivered at his touch and pressed his body back against Blaine's.

"Your perfect…" Blaine whispered in his ear. "Your perfect…"

Kurt smiled and pressed his lips back against Blaine's. The rest of their clothes hit the floor. They fell against the bed together, a blur of bare skin. Blaine was letting out little moans against Kurt's ear and it was driving Kurt crazy. Blaine's hands were warm and demanding, they couldn't get enough of Kurt, it felt like they were everywhere at the same time. Electricity sparked between them… Kurt gasped out Blaine's name against his lips…

Present

Blaine woke with a start, a cold sweat braking out on his forehead, his heart hammering. He'd dreamt about it. Again. Kurt's soft skin. Hearing Kurt moan his name was constantly in his ears and it turned him on like crazy. He let his head sink into his hands and slammed his fist against the wall. Fucking hell! He needed to see Dr. Wilkes again. He'd make an appointment.

His house had been in chaos when he had staggered in that previous morning. His mother practically threw herself at him.

"Blaine! Baby! Where have you been?" She held him tight. "Oh, your father and I were so worried! You disappeared… Blaine… what happened to your eye? Oh my God… Blaine?"

"I tripped and fell." Blaine said.

"Where were you?" His father exclaimed. "We've had search parties all over the place, don't you ever fucking do that to us again Blaine!"

"I…" Blaine paused. How was he going to explain this one? "Went for a walk, I got a bit lost because it was dark… and then I ran into a friend and they said I could crash at theirs because it was late and I… didn't want to wake you guys."

His parents stared at him. Deep, deep down inside themselves they knew Blaine was lying. But their want, their need for him to be telling the truth overrode those feelings. They let Blaine lie to them. Because it's easier to let someone lie to you than face the truth.

"Well… we are glad your okay… we tried to call you…" His mother looked up at him her big doe brown eyes filled with unshed tears.

"My phone died." Blaine replied shortly.

"Call Maggie… she's just as worried as we were." John Anderson stared long and hard at his son. Lying little shit, his mind hissed. If he could prove Blaine had been with someone else that night… he would make sure his son never left the house again until every little part of his…disease was purged from his sick little body. John turned on his heel and strode out of the room.

Blaine watched him with contempt. His mother bit her lip. As it turned out Blaine didn't have to phone Maggie because at that second she burst through the front door and threw herself with twice as much force than his mother had at Blaine. She sobbed furiously into his neck, beating at his chest with her fists.

"Blaine! What the fuck? I have been… fucking going out of my mind… you stupid, stupid bastard…" Maggie looked at him with furious eyes.

Blaine briefly enjoyed the look of bewilderment on his mothers face as various profanities dropped from Maggie's supposedly angelic lips. She cleared her throat.

"I'll leave you two… to um… sort things out." And with that she left.

Maggie had made Blaine describe what had happened in agonizing detail. What had he been doing going for a walk at night? Why did he have a black eye? Who was this 'friend' he had stayed with? Blaine sat calmly and reeled out a list of lies. Part of him did feel a little guilty for lying to Maggie's face… but what was he supposed to say? That he'd spent the night with Kurt? Kissing… touching… and… and it had been fucking amazing. That Blaine's body set on fire at the memories of the way Kurt had caressed him…

Blaine scrubbed at his eyes furiously as if doing so would scrub the memory from his brain. What was wrong with him? Why couldn't he just like girls like… like a normal boy. Why did he have to be different? It wasn't fair. None of this was fair. Kurt had been trying to contact him all Sunday. His mobile had been ringing off the hook. He ignored the calls, the messages. He ignored the knocks to his door when he parents were out. He even ignored Kurt shouting at him from below his window, begging him just to come out and talk to him. Blaine didn't want to talk to Kurt. He didn't want to see Kurt. Because every time he did see him he was reminded of how happy he had been when he was in Kurt's arms. Like nothing in the world could touch him… or them. Just the sound of Kurt's voice from below his window had turned him on like crazy… how long had it been since that very voice had been moaning his name. Blaine had taken a cold shower.

Blaine knew he wouldn't be able to ignore Kurt forever. Today he would be forced to walk into Dalton Academy and see him. He would avoid him the best he could, but Blaine knew Kurt would seek him out. Corner him. Make him talk things over. Kurt's lips were… very persuasive.

Blaine got out of bed, showered and dressed. Maggie would be here any minute. They were going to walk to school together.

"She's a lovely girl…" Blaine mumbled to himself as he pocketed his phone, he stared long and hard into the mirror. "You find her attractive… you find her sexy… you want her." Blaine repeated the words to himself as if by doing so he could somehow make it to be true.

The doorbell rang, Maggie must be early. Blaine took a deep breath and went downstairs. Grabbing an apple he opened the door. Kurt was stood outside his door. His bag slung loosely across one shoulder. Blaine tried to slam the door. Kurt was faster. He wedged his foot in the door, wincing as his foot was crushed in the doorframe. He held strong.

"Move your foot." Blaine demanded. "I don't want to talk."

Kurt stuck out his chin indignantly. "You know… that's the same tone of voice you asked me to kiss you in."

Blaine's face turned scarlet. "No I didn't." He said. Lies. Lies, lies, lies. Blaine remembered demanding Kurt to kiss him. He felt sick. Lies. Why was Blaine always lying? One day would he be able to tell the truth? Was he capable of telling the truth or had years of lying conditioned him to only be able to hide from the truth?

"Yes you did." Kurt said. "I'm not leaving until you talk to me." Using his foot as leverage Kurt pushed half his body through the doorway. Blaine loosened his push on the door. Blaine may not want to talk to Kurt but he certainly didn't want to crush him. Blaine found himself looking Kurt in the eyes… those beautiful shining green eyes. Those eyes that were looking at him now with nothing but love… Blaine could feel himself melting away. Vivid images of making love to Kurt against that door, right there, right now, flashed through his mind.

"Blaine." Kurt said softly. "Please… please talk to me… we can't ignore what… happened between us."

Blaine tried to cut in. Kurt wouldn't let him.

"I know that its hard… your parents are not exactly supportive but… I can help you… I want to help you, please, please don't shut me out." Kurt's eyes were pleading. Blaine watched his lips the whole time he was talking. He didn't want to shut Kurt out. He wanted… Oh shit, he didn't know what he fucking wanted.

"I'm… I'm not very well Kurt." Blaine said, cursing himself as his voice cracked with emotion. "I'm sorry that… my disease made me do those things to you."

Kurt stared at Blaine like he was out of his fucking mind. "Are you out of your fucking mind?" Kurt pushed himself through the door, Blaine let him. "What have they done to you Blaine?" Kurt searched desperately in Blaine's eyes for any signs he was joking. "What the fuck have they done…?"

Blaine leaned forward and pressed his face in Kurt's neck. He couldn't help himself. He hated himself for being so weak but… the second the sweet smell of Kurt's skin hit his nose he felt instantly relaxed. He nuzzled his face into Kurt's throat, desperately trying to get closer. Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine and rocked him gently. This was going to be harder than he thought. Blaine was far more messed up than he had first anticipated. Kurt sighed. Was Blaine worth all this shit? Yes. Yes. Kurt had no doubts about that.

"I hate… how I feel for you… I hate it." Blaine said through gritted teeth. His words hit Kurt like a slap in the face but… but… Blaine was admitting he had some kinds of feelings for Kurt wasn't he? Okay yes. He may hate that he felt for Kurt… but he felt for him. That was a start. Wasn't it? Kurt didn't know how long they stood there. He kept his arms tight around Blaine's shoulders. Blaine continued to move his lips back and forth over Kurt's throat… it wasn't a kiss but it was enough to cause Kurt to nearly fall flat on his face.

Their peaceful embrace was interrupted as the clicking sound of Maggie's heels woke Blaine up like someone had just thrown ice in his face. He shoved Kurt away from him with enough force that Kurt collided with the door, Blaine moved past him.

"Maggie!" He exclaimed, guilt lining his features. Oh fuck. He'd done it again. What was it about Kurt's presence that caused him to loose his head like that? He turned around just to glimpse, Kurt walking away. Blaine wished he hadn't looked. Tears were falling over Kurt's perfect cheeks. He stared at Blaine, long and hard. Blaine looked at the floor. Maggie took his hand and dragged him away. She threw Kurt a look of irritation over her shoulder. What was he always doing around Blaine?

Kurt watched Blaine walk away with Maggie, anger boiling in his chest. The back of his head was throbbing from where Blaine had shoved him into the door. He clenched his fists and stalked in the opposite direction. Fuck him. Kurt thought… then paused. Actually. That was whole damn problem; Kurt did want to fuck him. Stupid double meanings. It's not over. Kurt's mind whispered. Its only just begun… watch your boyfriend Maggie… because he… is… mine.