If only it was a little crush.

21 Days Until Kurt's Wedding

Blaine's phone danced on the coffee table as it accepted a new text message. As he reached for the devise, Kurt snatched it up. Sinking back into the couch, Blaine didn't even bother fighting for his phone. Somehow, Kurt knew when someone's texts weren't juicy, when he was allowed to read them aloud. He always took Blaine's phone, and after many years of this, Blaine gave up fighting. He always lost anyhow.

"Alek and Dex were on the bar using their glasses as microphones, singing "Bad Romance" really obnoxiously," Kurt read the text from Spencer. "Needless to say, I stopped after that drink."

"Reply: Oh my God! Make sure this doesn't turn into a scene from The Hangover. Get some sleep tonight, okay? with a smilie face."

Distracted by texting the message, Blaine watched Kurt without fear of being caught. He had taken his friend's advice. He took a chance with Spencer. Still, as nice as Spencer was, Blaine couldn't take his eyes off Kurt.

He's getting married in three weeks. Get over your little crush, Blaine, the boy thought, evading his eyes as Kurt placed his phone on the table again. If only it was a little crush.

"I'm still worried Alek's going to get hurt," Kurt admitted, his face creasing in anxiety.

They were lying with their heads on either side of the couch. Their legs were bent and rested against each other in the middle. Blaine gently nudged Kurt with his legs.

"Alek's in good hands," Blaine said genuinely. "Spencer wouldn't let anything happen to him."

Kurt's eyebrows rose apprehensively. He said harshly, "And you know this from two weeks of texting?" Softening instantly, Kurt added, "Sorry. I didn't mean to sound like that. I just have all these scenarios in my head that won't go away."

"It's late; they're probably not even out anymore," Blaine said truthfully.

"Can I be honest with you?" Kurt asked, sitting up. Sitting up as well, Blaine replied with a nod. "Those scenarios in my head aren't even about Alek."

"What do you mean?" Blaine questioned confused.

"What if I die? What if I get hit by a car? I'll be dead and can't get married. Or what if I get alcohol poisoning? And then I die. Everyone'll be at my funeral instead of my wedding," Kurt ranted.

Blaine couldn't help but smile. "You've actually been thinking about this? Getting hit by a car?" Kurt gave a tragic nod. "You're not going to die."

"But what if something goes wrong? What if- What if-"

"What if…?"

"What if something like New Years happens again?" Kurt asked, his eyes cast away. Blaine swallowed a huge lump in his throat. "What if something goes wrong?"

Blaine didn't see this coming. He didn't prepare himself for this kind of a blow. Never in a million years would Kurt choose Blaine. That's what this conversation was telling him, that and kissing Blaine is the equivalent of getting hit by a car.

With a heavy heart, Blaine said, "Nothing will go wrong."

"Do you promise?"

"I promise."

15 Days Before Kurt's Wedding

For the bachelor party, Blaine reserved them an entire block of hotel rooms. Crowding in his and Kurt's room, Blaine took a head count of everyone as Noah Puckerman poured out shots handing them out. Kurt invited his entire high school Glee Club (minus their director) to his party. Although, it was a bachelor party, the boys were out numbered by the girls. Only four couldn't make it: Mike Chang, Lauren Zizes, Sam Evans, and Artie Abrams. Other than that, Blaine counted, there were ten present.

"We need to loosen up!" Puck announced. "There's no way our boy Kurt will have a good time if we're all a bunch of stiffs."

And as the entire room clanked each other's glasses in a melody of cheers!,Blaine figured this could go one of two ways: really great or be a complete disaster. So he downed his shot, face puckering from the taste.

"Okay the limo should be outside!" Blaine spoke, clapping to get everyone's attention."Let's get this party going!"

As they tried to cram out of the door all at once, Finn found his way to Blaine's side.

"Tonight should be epic, man," Finn assumed. His words were friendly, but his eyes were shifty.

"With what we have planned…" Blaine trailed off. He fell back into the small crowd. He didn't need Finn's knowing eyes tonight.

As if by a magnetic pull, he was at Kurt's side.

"I can't believe you're getting married, Kurt" Tina Cohen-Chang beamed. "You're the first of all of us!"

"Honestly, I figured you'd still be boyfriend-less even today with your perfect zero-lays record in high school," Santana Lopez said bluntly. "Good for you, Hummel."

"They're not getting married because one of them is pregnant, right?" Brittany Pierce asked softly, eying Kurt's stomach. "That's what happened to my parents."

Blaine laughed as Santana pulled Brittany away to explain to her the obvious. He caught Kurt's eye and smiled. Blaine knew he missed his friends. Most of them were still in Ohio, so he never saw them. Kurt returned a genuine smile.

They piled into the hummer limo. The inside looked like a tiny club. Finn immediately popped the Champaign, the foam spilling onto Rachel Berry's head. To retaliate, she went to punch him but was knocked onto the floor as the limo moved. Without even bothering to pour the liquid into glasses, Finn passed the bottle around.

Mercedes, taking a long swig of the drink, asked Blaine, "What do you have planned? We aren't just drinking all night are we?" but nonetheless took another sip.

"We've got some awesome stuff planned!" Finn supplied, turning up the music.

"There better not be strippers!" Kurt exclaimed, grabbing the Champaign.

Puck groaned, socking Finn in the side. He grunted, "If you ordered these chicks strippers, you are gay, and I've been right for years!"

Quinn Fabray smiled, pulling her boyfriend away from Puckerman. Finn looked grateful. Rachel shifted her eyes between the pair, curiously.

"It's about a fifteen minute trip to the bar," Blaine spoke over the murmurs. "So take advantage of the limo!"

"I for one think we should all be very careful tonight," Rachel announced, standing on the seat to make herself inches taller than the rest. "Overdrinking is foolish and-"

"Shut up, Dobby," Santana spat, chugging down the last of the Champaign. "Have fun for once in your life!"

"Santana, my reputation is up for judgment everyday in the public eye. I can't give anyone a reason to-"

"Rachel, you are an understudy for a show that is off-Broadway," Kurt emphasized. "No one cares."

"Not even us," Puck said, messing up her already sticky hairdo.

A few minute's later the limo came to an abrupt stop, knocking most people sideways. Finn ushered everyone out of the limo. Crowding around the front doors of a small bar, the buzz of excitement in the air continued. Finn was the first to enter and everyone else followed.

Inside, it was empty and really dark. Blaine glanced around. This portion of the night was Finn's idea, and he suddenly regretted leaving any decisions to Finn.

"This way!" Finn called.

"This is a scene from a horror movie; I'm telling you," Mercedes whispered to Kurt. He nodded, eyes wide.

Finn pushed through a set of double doors. The room they walked into had an immediate warm feel. Looking around, everyone realized they were in a private bar. A bartender stood behind the counter, bottles of liquor on shelves behind him.

"We are just drinking all night!" Mercedes laughed. "That's fine. I'll have a-"

"Wait," Finn interrupted. "We're not being served. We're learning how to make cocktails."

Santana and Puck instantly perked up to this news. And as if they read each other's minds, the two climbed over the bar and into the bartender's station.

"Take a break, sweet cakes," Santana said, smacking the guy's ass. "Let the professionals take it from here."

Disgruntled, the bartender stocked away. "Just don't break anything," he said as an afterthought.

"Quinn, get up here. You're the first person for body shots!" Puck ordered, stacking up glasses on the counter. Kurt and Blaine exchanged a look.

"No!" Finn exclaimed.

"Finn's right. We don't want to get wasted. This is only the first thing we're doing," Blaine said awkwardly. "Teach me how to flip a bottle without smashing it. I think that's pretty cool."

Crowding around the table, everyone started spilling liquid upon liquid into their designated cups. Puck demonstrated all the little tricks he's picked up through the years, and Santana ran off recipes that no one could really keep up on.

They tried to make a Cosmopolitan.

"This tastes like windshield wiper fluid!" Kurt shrieked, spitting his drink onto the floor.

"You didn't add enough cranberry juice!"

Kurt grabbed the bottle of cranberry juice and chugged to get rid of the taste.

They tried to make a Mojito.

Tina gagged. "This is disgusting!"

Mercedes took a sip, which she sprayed all over Santana. Repulsed, her mouth gaping, Santana's hand 'slipped' and the drink poured down Mercedes' front.

Dabbing her with napkins, Kurt said, "You should be okay. It's clear. It shouldn't stain!"

"I'm going to smell like this all night!"

"No one'll judge you," Blaine assured.

When Blaine made a Screwdriver, he was really pleased with himself.

"This tastes great!" he almost sang. Rachel tried it, nodding in approval.

"It's Vodka and orange juice. A monkey could make that," Santana spat, rolling her eyes.

After a few more failed attempts at drink making and trick learning, the gang headed back to the limo. Most were tipsy, but no one was drunk. Internally, as Blaine stepped into the vehicle, he wished he were.

Fighting a smile, he waited. Then the lights went out. The girls shrieked, and Blaine felt those on either side of him tense.

"What just happened?" Kurt whispered into his ear.

"I heard someone's getting married!" a loud unfamiliar voice spoke. The lights were on again.

Everyone pointed desperately at Kurt. An attractive man wearing a driver's suit approached him. He grabbed Kurt's tie and pulled him up, moving him to the front of the limo into an empty seat. Kurt shot Blaine daggers with his eyes. Blaine just smiled to himself.

"I knew you were gay!" Puck shouted, who stood up and pointed at Finn. Mercedes and Tina immediately pulled him down beside them.

All the girls were laughing their heads off as the stripper started to undo his suit buttons, dragging the coat slowly down his arms. Puck and Finn were evading their eyes as if the man didn't exist. As the stripped flung the coat around Kurt's shoulders, sitting on his lap, Blaine caught Kurt's eye.

Kurt started wide-eyed at him, horrified. They didn't send any messages between each other. This was probably due to the fact that Kurt couldn't think straight. There was a man stripping in his lap.

"Take it off!" Santana shouted, jumping up and down. Brittany giggled next to her, taking her hand in her own.

The man ripped off his pants. Blocking her eyes, Rachel yelped, "I am not drunk enough for this!"

As the show continued, with each new item of clothing removed, Blaine's stomach twisted. Not reacting, just looking at Kurt, who was obviously too embarrassed to look at anyone, Blaine realized how getting a stripper wasn't his best idea. He thought it'd be funny, but he sat there consumed in jealousy. No one's allowed to touch Kurt like that. It was vile.

The limo stopped as the stripper started giving Kurt a slow lap dance, only in his tiny underwear. Kurt had his hands over his face, laughing. Blaine rushed to the door, pulling it open.

"We're here!" he yelled over the commotion.

The girls groaned, getting up. Puck and Finn raced past everyone to get off first. Soon, the only people in the limo were Kurt, Blaine, and the stripper.

"Did you have a good time?" the stripper asked, touching Kurt's fingers which still hide his face. Kurt let the stripper pull his hands away.

"I was humiliated and uncomfortable," Kurt stammered, "but yes, I did have a good time."

"Kurt…" Blaine muttered.

Both boys looked at Blaine.

"Are we done?" the stripper asked. "I'm sure your friends wouldn't mind if you were a little late." The stripper winked.

"No, he's done!" Blaine warned, breaking the pair apart. "Thank you for your…service."

Blaine tugged Kurt away. Kurt was giggling uncontrollably behind him. They were at a club, and the others were already inside. Holding tightly to Kurt's hand, Blaine forced his way in and around until he found their circle of friends.

They catcalled when Kurt arrived. Kurt was probably blushing, but the flashing lights hide it well. Both boys took the drinks that were offered to them.

"Here's to Kurt!" Rachel called over the music.

"The only one of us with his head on his shoulders!" Mercedes yelled, raising her glass.

"To many years of marriage!" Puck shouted.

"To many happy years with Alek!" Quinn bellowed.

"To many, many gay babies!" Brittany finished.

They cheered to that and downed their drinks. Breaking off in pairs, they retreated to the dance floor.

"I'm going to just sit for a little," Kurt yelled into Blaine's ear.

Watching everyone dance away from the pair, Blaine turned to Kurt who walked to their huge booth. Blaine sat beside him.

"Are you having fun?" Blaine asked.

Pulling away from Kurt's ear, he saw the wide smile on Kurt's face. "I'm having an amazing time! I'm just overwhelmed right now! I need a break before anything else!"

Blaine smiled and nodded. Pulling his phone out of his pocket, he placed his empty glass and it onto the small table in front of them.

"I'll stay with you until you're ready to dance!"

The beat pulsed in their ears and all around them. Looking over his shoulder, Blaine tried to find everyone. He saw them all gradually. Brittany and Santana were kicking everyone else's tails on the floor, sticking really close together, getting plenty of male attention, which they weren't concerned with, silly smiles plastered onto their faces as they looked into each other's eyes. The alcohol must have been setting in because Mercedes and Tina were laughing uncontrollably, bumping into everyone else and each other, receiving harsh glares from those around them. Puck kept trying to grind up on both Quinn and Rachel. Both girls shied away from his thrusts. It was pretty funny, Blaine decided. They looked like prude preteens. Looking at every face, Blaine couldn't find Finn.

There was a tap on his shoulder. Looking back at Kurt, he saw that his friend was holding his lit up phone. The text on the scene had been opened. Slightly panicked, he snatched his phone.

Meet me by the bathroom, asap, Finn's text read.

Kurt got up in the next second, dancing towards the floor. Watching close as Kurt made his way to save Quinn and Rachel, Blaine stood up.

Finn was waited on the floor in front of the Boys Bathroom, fiddling with his thumbs.

"Sit, sit," Finn called, patting the spot beside him.

Hesitantly, Blaine did as he was told. Finn had his knowing eyes on.

"What?" Blaine questioned shyly.

"Did you tell Kurt yet?" Finn asked immediately. "I saw the death glares you were sending that stripper. I told you it wasn't a good idea."

"He said he was having fun," Blaine said with a shrug.

"Blaine, you know you're out of time, right?"

Blaine bit his lip. "I know."

"So, did you tell him?" Finn asked again.

"I can't, Finn. I can't tell him. He's going to get married, and I'm going to have to move on."

Finn elbowed Blaine. "At least you've come to terms with it, man."

"I just want him to be happy."

Finn gripped his shoulder. "You're really in love him, aren't you?"

"Painfully so."

Finn gave him a sad smile and pulled himself up. Helping Blaine onto his feet, the boys went back into the club. The sound engulfed them as did the smell of alcohol, smoke, and sweat. Blaine didn't know why people liked clubs so much.

It took a little time to find their group. Everyone was there, except Kurt.

"Where's Kurt?" Blaine yelled into Mercedes ear. Turning his entire body, she had him focus in on the bar. Blaine saw him.

Rushing across the dance floor, Blaine made contact with Kurt's body, whipping him around. His drink spilled down his own arm. Kurt licked it up like a dog.

"BLAINE!" Kurt yelled happily. He downed his drink and took Blaine's hand. "Dance with me!"

Kurt breathed into Blaine's face. His breath smelled like really strong alcohol. Kurt must have had a few shots.

In a crowd of people, Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck and started to dance with him. Blaine felt really uncomfortable because they were so close. Looked away, he tried to find the others. Everyone was having a good time. Good.

Kurt forced Blaine's face forward, their noses almost touching. "STOP BEING SO UPTIGHT!"

Kurt positioned his legs on either side of Blaine's right thigh and started to shimmy his way up. Wide-eyed, Blaine forgot how to function. This was way too close. If he didn't stop Kurt soon, he'd have no control over anything; he'd be too absorbed in lust to stop. In actuality, he wanted to pull Kurt closer, press their body against each other so they couldn't breathe without forcing the other to do so too. But Blaine listened to his better judgment and pushed Kurt away.

Not seeming too fazed, Kurt laced his fingers in the curls at the base of Blaine's head. "Shhhh!" he hissed, putting a single finger on Blaine's lips.

Kurt inched closer. Their breath mingled together. Blaine's eyes fluttered shut even though his head was scolding him darkly. Kurt didn't kiss him though. He took hold of Blaine's arms and snaked them around his own stomach. Kurt laced his fingers together. Then suddenly, Kurt's back was grinding into Blaine's front.

Gasping, Blaine's eyes opened. His head jerked forward, resting on Kurt's shoulder. Kurt moved his hips to the rhythm and soon Blaine stopped resisting and moved with him.

Blaine's breathing arched in Kurt's ear, and Kurt laughed.

"Stop fighting," Kurt yelled, tilting his head back.

They looked at each other. Despite the crazy lust they were both shooting off, despite the amount of alcohol they both consumed, Kurt's eyes were soft, pleading.

This scared Blaine. He wrenched himself off Kurt abruptly.

Feeling disgusting, he backed away. Diving into the crowd, he escaped everyone he knew. Almost pulling his own hair out, he ran out of the club. Racing around the parking lot, he found the limo. He tore the door open.

What was he doing? What was he doing? Kurt is practically a married man. A few more minutes of dancing with Kurt, everything would have come apart. He wouldn't have been able to control his actions, his desires. Why did he make such stupid choices with Kurt – why, when he could risk losing everything? He felt nauseous.

The door opened.

"Blaine? Are you in here?"

Blaine didn't realize there were no lights in the limo. Kurt walked around the side, knocking of the front door. Blaine heard murmuring and then the lights flickered on. Kurt walked into the limo.

"Why'd you run away?" he asked immediately.

"It was just too much," Blaine said honestly. "I'm sorry, Kurt. I keep breaking my promise – that nothing will go wrong."

Kurt smiled sweetly at Blaine, reaching out his hand for him to take. "Nothing's going wrong. Just come back inside."

Blaine gazed up at his hand. He could take it and follow Kurt back inside and have fun. Or he could sit here and be miserable. One ensures no trouble and the other could ruin everything. So he just stared at Kurt's hand.

"I trust you, Blaine," Kurt said softly.

Blaine's eyes shot up to meet Kurt's eyes. He suddenly had an option three – not take Kurt's hand and leave, not reject his hand and stay. In his head, he saw himself grab Kurt's hand, pulling them together, kissing him. They'd kiss and kiss and kiss until the others came back, and then they'd go back to their hotel room and things would escalate. In the morning, Kurt wouldn't remember a thing, but for tonight, they'd have something they both seemed to want. Each other.

Blaine took Kurt's hand. He couldn't do that. Not to Alek, not to Kurt, not to himself. So, he stood up and followed Kurt inside. Making sure they stayed around everyone else, the dancing never got to the intensity it previously had been. They all danced for hours until they were too sore to even walk. Dizzily, they found their way back to the limo.

"Britt-Britt, will you put your shirt back on!" Santana cried, tears splattering in all directions as she desperately tried to hide Brittany from everyone's eyes. "Berry keeps staring at you!"

"I do not!" Rachel yelling, clinging close to Finn.

"STOP TOUCHING HIM!" Quinn bellowed, pushing Rachel into Puck's arms.

"You're going to break her!" Puck shouted as Rachel hugged him tightly.

Everyone continued to bicker; Santana continued to sob; Brittany continued to strip, and Mercedes and Tina crashed together and dozing off. Everything drowned out as Kurt's head hit Blaine's shoulder though. Looking sideways, he stared down at the sleeping boy.

Alek, you are so lucky, Blaine thought, his eyes prickling with the tears that started to form.

It was a task getting everyone into the hotel and into their rooms. Finn had to carry Kurt. He was too drunk, too tired to do anything on his own. He placed Kurt down onto his bed. Patting Blaine's back, Finn exited the room.

Walking over to Kurt, Blaine smiled down at his snoozing friend. He reached forward and touched Kurt's cheek, his thumb running back and forth over his cheekbone. His felt sober, like the butterflies assaulting his stomach washed away the alcohol.

His took off Kurt's tie, placing it neatly on the bedside table. Sucking in a breath, he leaned forward and kissed Kurt's forehead. Smiling sadly down at him, Blaine turned away.

"Blaine," Kurt whispered.

"Yeah, Kurt?" Blaine asked, moving back to Kurt's side.

"Sleep here," Kurt muttered. "Sleep next to me."

Blaine nodded. Without removing one article of clothing, Blaine eased into the bed next to Kurt. He made room and kept Blaine near. Their faces were close, and Kurt put one hand on Blaine's side with the other one his chest. Blaine didn't touch Kurt.

Flicking the light off, Blaine tried to fall asleep. His eyes adjusting to the room's darkness, and he could now made out Kurt's face. His eyes were open, staring at Blaine too.

"I'm sorry," Kurt whispered, fingers slowing gripping Blaine's shirt.

"I don't know what you're sorry for, but you probably don't have to be sorry for it."

Kurt sniffled. Closing the distance, Kurt tucked his head under Blaine's chin. He wasn't crying, but Blaine figured he was fighting the tears.

"I love you," Kurt whispered slowly, hands holding Blaine close.

Blaine's heart thumped. "I love you too, Kurt." It was true but could have a double-meaning.

"You don't understand…"

"Hmmm, what?"

"This could have been us."

Blaine didn't know what Kurt was talking about. "What could have?"

Kurt said this so softly; Blaine almost didn't catch it. "This." Kurt nuzzled closer.

Confused, Blaine pulled away. Kurt's eyes were pleading with Blaine to understand, to hear what he was really saying.

"I love you. I always have," Kurt whispered. "Even now."

Blaine's heart expanded, pulling in every drop of Kurt's words, understanding, finally what Kurt was trying to say.

Blaine cupped Kurt's cheek.

"This could have been us," Kurt whispered again, his voice hoarse.

Suddenly, as if it was too hard to look at Blaine, Kurt pushed his head against Blaine's chest.

"But it's not," Kurt sobbed, finally allowing himself to cry. "It can't be."

Ignoring the pain he was feeling, Blaine clung to Kurt. He couldn't really do anything else. He was helpless. He held on tightly until the sobs turned to breathing and the breathing leveled out.

Blaine realized one thing. Kurt wouldn't remember this in the morning.

He didn't know how he felt about that.