Aug. 4, 2011, 8:25 p.m.
Go The Distance: Chapter 9
T - Words: 1,859 - Last Updated: Aug 04, 2011 Story: Closed - Chapters: 13/? - Created: Aug 04, 2011 - Updated: Aug 04, 2011 1,257 0 0 0 0
"I want to leave you guys with one last song, tonight. It's a song that I've been singing for years now, but it never held any real meaning to me... until this summer. This summer, someone came into my life and changed everything. Changed how I see the world. Changed who I am. Changed how I love. And he's here with me tonight. He's been with me every night. And even though I keep bombarding him with songs, and I'm sure he's probably getting tired of it, it's the best way I know how to tell him how I feel. So here it goes."
Kurt giggled from backstage at Blaine's joke. There was no way he'd ever get tired of hearing Blaine sing to him. Blaine had the voice of an angel. And Kurt always knew that Blaine meant every word of every song that he sang to him. No one had ever done that for Kurt before, and it meant the world to him.
Something between the two boys had shifted in the past few days. They were much more affectionate toward one another now. Kurt had opened up a part of himself by showing Blaine his home life. And now, more than ever, they were completely open about how they felt for each other, not bothering to hide the strong feelings that they so obviously felt.
They were truly best friends. They openly flirted with one another, holding hands and hugging as much as the possible could. They were like two pieces of a puzzle that had come together. And now Blaine was singing to Kurt again, and it was as if they were the only two people in the world. Blaine didn't even bother singing the song to the crowd that night. He never took his eyes off of Kurt.
The more I see you,
The more I want you.
Somehow this feeling
Just grows and grows.
With every sigh I become more mad about you,
More lost without you,
And so it goes.
Can you imagine
How much I'll love you
The more I see you
As years go by?
I know the only one for me can only be you.
My arms won't free you;
My heart won't try.
And with that, the show was done. Blaine rushed off the stage, running straight into the arms of Kurt, who planted a swift kiss on Blaine's cheek, before whispering,
"You mean so much to me."
But both knew that, with only a little over a week left on tour, nothing more could come out of it. Blaine was constantly hugging Kurt, holding his hands, snuggling up to him whenever possible. They always whispered secrets and jokes into each others ears, causing them to both break into fits of laughter.
But they both wanted more. They wanted to be able to be together. They wanted to be able to say "I love you" and know that they would be able to last past this summer. Blaine just knew there had to be an answer to this problem, he could practically feel the answer in the back of his mind somewhere, but he had yet to figure it out. Kurt would be in New York City, attending college and pursuing a career in fashion, while Blaine would go back to his life in California, working on another album.
"What about a long distance relationship?" Blaine questioned that night as they laid in bed, both on their sides, facing one another, so close that their noses were touching.
"I think after having you this summer, that wouldn't be enough. I want all of you, Blaine. I think we both deserve that."
"You're right..." Blaine said, hesitantly.
"Remember what I keep telling you, though. We have skype. We have cellphones. After another album or two you'll probably have a private jet. We can still be friends. We can keep in touch. Maybe I can come visit you during breaks from school, or something. We may not be able to be together, but we can still keep in touch." Kurt tried reassuring Blaine, while trying to reassure himself at the same time. He was just as upset over their situation. Kurt had racked his brain for an answer as well, but he hadn't been able to come up with a solution either.
"I just... I need you, Kurt. I need you to breathe. To live. This summer, you've become a part of me. I lo-"
"No. Don't say that." Kurt interrupted quickly.
"Please don't say that. I don't think I could take it if you did. Not without knowing if we'll be able to make it past next week."
Blaine hesitated before speaking again.
"Kurt, I may not have all of the answers now, but I'm trying here. I'm trying to find a way to make this work. We'll be together, and not just through skype and phone calls, although, if that's what it takes, that's what I'll do. We'll make it past next week. I promise. I'll do whatever it takes. I know we'll make it, because I can't imagine my life without you in it. I can feel it. We're going to make it, Ku-"
But Blaine was cut off again, this time by Kurt's lips on his.
Wait... what?
Kurt's lips were on his. Kurt was kissing him. All of Blaine's wildest dreams were coming true. And oh, he should probably kiss him back now.
Blaine responded eagerly, brushing his tongue gently against Kurt's bottom lip. Kurt opened his mouth, allowing Blaine's tongue to enter and battle with his own. It wasn't a fight for power or dominance. It was simply an expression of pent-up love and emotions.
Blaine grabbed Kurt's arms and pulled him on top of him. Kurt straddled the young superstar, deepening the kiss, before suddenly jerking back, pulling up for air.
"Oh my god. What am I doing?" Kurt gasped out, mentally slapping himself for being so stupid.
"You were kissing me. Why'd you stop?" Blaine asked, not completely in his right mind yet, still high off of the feeling of Kurt's lips on his. Kurt's body on his.
"I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry. You mean the world to me, Blaine. I wish we could have been doing that all summer, but I just completely disregarded that whole conversation we just had. We don't know how to make this work, Blaine. I know you're trying. I know we're brainstorming, but, in reality, we only have two weeks left together." Kurt explained, trying to rationalize to himself why he had stopped kissing Blaine, the man of his dreams. The man he was totally and completely in love with. The man who had never looked as gorgeous than in that moment, practically glowing after kissing him... and what was Kurt saying? Oh yeah. Kissing. Right. Bad. It was bad.
"So why can't we do this for the next two weeks?" Blaine questioned, still not seeing a problem in his high state. He knew, deep down, that they probably shouldn't be doing this... that they would end up getting hurt, but, after kissing Kurt like that, the man he loved, he couldn't think straight. He couldn't find a reason to not just keep on kissing Kurt.
"Because where will that leave us? We'll be heart broken when this all comes crashing down. I don't want to get in too deep." Kurt argued, finally regaining the ability to think again.
"But I'm already in too deep. There's no stopping that. It's too late. Kurt... I'm- I'm in love with you. There. I said it. I, Blaine Anderson, love you, Kurt Hummel. So I don't see why I can't show that to you."
Kurt was crying now. So Blaine reached up and pulled Kurt back close to him, attempting to comfort him the best way he knew how.
"I... I love you, too, Blaine. I do. I really do. I just... I don't know what to do."
"Hey, shhh, it's ok. I'm sorry. It's ok. I love you. Don't worry. We'll figure it out, okay. I'll do everything I can to figure it out. But for now, can we please just be together? I don't think I can handle another day being with you without having all of you."
Kurt nodded, unable to speak through his tears, and then buried his head into Blaine's chest. They eventually fell asleep, wrapped up in one another tighter than ever before.
Blaine was, surprisingly, the first to wake the next morning. He usually slept longer than Kurt, but took the opportunity this time to watch the young man sleep. Kurt was laying half on top of him, so Blaine adjusted himself so that he could look down and see his face. Kurt looked like an angel when he slept. But then again, Kurt looked like an angel all the time. Blaine was so in love with him. He just had to find a way to be with him. Forever.
Woah. Where did that thought come from? Blaine knew he was in love, but woah. That was intense. Forever... wow.
Blaine glanced down at Kurt again as Kurt began to stir in his sleep, gradually waking up. Slowly, Kurt began to open his eyes, only to see Blaine looking down at him with a loving expression in his eyes.
"I like waking up to your face." Kurt said in a deep, husky voice, unlike anything Blaine had ever heard the young man emit. But, then again, Blaine usually woke up so long after Kurt that Kurt was rid of his sleepy voice by the time Blaine heard him talk. Blaine enjoyed hearing Kurt's voice like this. He hoped to wake up to it thousands times more.
And woah. There were those intense thoughts again. But you know what, Blaine didn't even care. He didn't care that he had only known Kurt for that summer. He didn't care that they were so young. He didn't care about anything in that moment except for Kurt. He would definitely find a way to be with him, no matter what it took.
Blaine smiled down at Kurt, placing a kiss to the top of his head.
"Good morning, sleepy head. You haven't changed your mind about us since we talked last night, have you?"
Kurt had to think for a minute about what they had discussed the previous night. He was still pretty out of it from being asleep. But then it all came rushing back. They had kissed. And told each other that they loved one another. They had basically said 'fuck it' to the future and decided to live in the here and now. And Kurt had never felt so happy or relieved.
Kurt leaned up and pressed a passionate kiss onto Blaine's lips. He could feel Blaine smiling into the kiss.
"I'll take that as a no." Blaine joked, after they both finally pulled away from the kiss.
Kurt snuggled his head back into Blaine's neck.
"Can we just stay like this forever?" Kurt mumbled into Blaine's neck.
Blaine smiled. So Kurt was in this just as deep as he was.
"You know, I was just thinking that. I'm pretty sure that can be arranged."
And with that, the boys fell back asleep, content to spend the entire day just laying in each others arms.