Blaine somehow got from the train station to his apartment, though he wasn't quite sure about the details other than he had just walked into a cab sitting there and mumbled some directions.  He had given the guy some cash when he pulled up on his street, not even looking at the fare on the screen, but knew it was probably too much given how prolifically the guy had thanked him.  When he walked, his legs felt like stone that he had to physically pull up and drag along with his body, and he let his bags and coat fall off him once he entered the apartment, ignoring the joyful greeting of Romeo and the turned heads of his sister and Wes on the couch looking at him in surprise as he stumbled to his room and just crawled into bed where he pressed the pillow up against his face and screamed.

Wes came in shortly thereafter.

“So… I'm guessing things are not okay…”

Wes was clearly a genius.  Blaine didn't bother pulling his face away from the pillow, or moving at all for that matter.  He didn't want Wes to see how much he had already cried in such a short time span, how utterly hopeless he felt.

“Do you…. want to talk about it?”

No he didn't!  If he did he wouldn't be hiding in his blankets and sheets and pillow and avoiding any form of contact!  How the hell did Wes get into medical school if he couldn't figure something as obvious as that out?

“Oh for gosh sakes… let me handle this Wes.”  Blaine could hear Rachel make her way in and then he was promptly shoved in the side and rolled over by his sister.  “Get up and explain!”

Blaine made a grunt and rolled himself back over.  He was not doing anything under duress, especially not for his two faced sister who only cared because it meant her contact with K.J. would now be limited or cut off entirely.

“Did you cheat on him?  Did you lie?  Explain yourself young man!” Rachel huffed above him, trying to dig him out with her hands though this time Blaine braced himself better and could stave off her attempts.

“Blaine wouldn't do that Rachel…”  he heard Wes note quietly.  Why the hell were both Wes and Rachel in the same room anyhow?

“Then why is he here all of a sudden without Kurt and that cute nephew of mine and all sobby and pathetic?!”

He heard Wes sigh, and then murmur something to Rachel, which got her off the bed.  The door was closed a moment later letting Blaine feel like crap in peace.

They gave him his space, at least for a day when Wes came in and tried to get Blaine to get out of the bed, saying he stunk and noting that Blaine hadn't moved since he was in there before.  If Blaine didn't have to go to the bathroom, he would have ignored him.

After that, Blaine lost all track of time.  He didn't bother to charge his phone or change his clothing, or get out of bed, sucking in as much of Kurt's scent that was left there from so long before until it seemed to vanish and then he cried before going into his closet and smelling all of Kurt's clothes that were still there.  Wes found him there at one point, a pile of himself and all of Kurt's clothes on the floor.

“Oh my god Blaine.  Get up.  This is ridiculous!”

“Go ‘way!” Blaine muttered, closed the closet door on Wes who yelled through the wood accusing him of being a baby.

So what if he was?  What did it matter if he was anything anymore?

Eventually, Blaine took his pity party out of his bedroom and into the music room, turning it into a new home for himself where he slept on the floor (with the help of Kurt's left behind sleeping medicine he never took), drank all of the alcohol he could find in the house, and tinkered aimlessly on his instruments.  

“Ew…”  was what he woke up to on one particular morning.. or was it afternoon?  Whatever it was, Rachel was walking tip toed around his mess on the floor and towards him.  “Blaine.  You can't keep doing this.  I'm going to call mom and dad.  You need an intervention or something.”

He was pretty sure he grunted up at her and then rolled the other way.  If he couldn't see her, she couldn't possibly be there.

At least that's the way he thought things would work out until she poked him in the back with her pointy heels,  “Get up Blaine.  You're a disgusting mess.  When was the last time you shaved?  Or showered?  Or put on pants for that matter?”

He glanced down at himself.  When did he end up only in boxers?

“Don't wanna.”

“Don't care mister.  Get your pathetic heap of bones vertical or, so help me, I will get Wes to help me and we will dump you into a bath even if you're kicking and screaming the whole way.  You are stinking up the whole apartment so bad your dog doesn't even want to come close to you.”

“Don't care.”  He mumbled, but pushed himself up to a sitting position, looking at all the empty cans of vegetables and cracker boxes that he had consumed over the past… however many days it had been.

“Come on.  I'm not leaving until you're in the shower washing your grimy butt.  Honestly, how are you even my brother?”  She tutted, crossing her arms and waiting as Blaine slowly stood up and walked out towards the main bathroom.  It was just safer to comply with her when she made threats like that.

He found himself cleaned up after when he got back out, and went to lay on his bed, purposely leaving off his clothing.  She wouldn't bug him if he was nude right?

Wrong.

“Augh!”  Was her first reaction on walking in and seeing him there in the buff, but she got over it quickly and tossed a towel over him.  “You didn't shave!  Get shaved now!”

“Why Rachel?  What's the point?”

“I'm your big sister.  You have to listen to me.  That's the point.  Now do it or I'm going at you with a razor and I can't promise I won't cut you.”

Ugh.

So he shaved, and then combed and styled his hair because she insisted on that too.  Then she forced him to finish cleaning up with her and then sit down to eat a real meal as she prattled on about her current role.

“Why are you here Rachel…?” He mumbled at one point, tired of listening to her.  God she was exhausting.

“Because I live here you dope.”

He squinted and looked around.  Sure enough, he had completely missed that a number of her decorations were back in place from when she had lived here with him before.  “When did that happen?”

“Honestly?  You've been home for almost two weeks and you haven't noticed?  God Blaine… you're just….”  She shook her head, “Wes and I are back together and we decided to move in together when we both figured that you and Kurt would be happily married in Ohio by now.”

That little piece of information came out too readily and as Rachel slapped a hand over her own mouth, Blaine began openly sobbing over his salad.

“Blaine… Blaine… I'm sorry…”

“He… broke… up… with… me… over… his…. kid….”  Blaine managed to get out between choked sobs.

She scooted her chair over and wrapped her arms around his shoulder, “Oh Blaine… It wasn't over his kid.  It was because he thought he was setting you free from something you didn't want.”

“But… I…. love…. him….”

“And he loves you too baby brother.. but he can't pick between that love and his child… if you want to be with him you have to be more than just a boyfriend now.”

“I… don't…. know…. how….”

“Well for starters… start taking care of yourself… honestly Blaine, you've always taken care of everyone else but yourself.  You need to change that.”

“How?”

She sighed and he felt her rubbing his back gently.  The last time she had consoled him like this was after he was hurt in middle school.  “You know Blaine… it's funny… I always get told I'm so self focused and don't think about others… and you're the opposite… maybe we both need to learn from one another…”

“I miss him…”

“Understatement much baby brother?”  She said, pulled back and lifting an eyebrow playfully, “You were snuggling his socks in the music room.  His socks.  Clearly you miss him or at the very least you have some weird foot fetish.”

“He does have nice feet…”  He murmured while she chuckled and shook her head.

“He has nice everything.  Now come on.  Finish your food.  You need to get back to real life.”

So Blaine complied, but inwardly he still ached.  Real life?  What was his real life?  And why would he want to get back to it?