Blaine wakes from a pleasant doze to his alarm buzzing away. He slaps it off and rises from bed with a satisfying stretch, his body feeling loose and relaxed. Good thing, too--it’ll make prepping himself easier. He could let one of the other boys do it, but for a few reasons he’s never felt comfortable letting anyone else do it. Maybe it makes him hypocritical--after all, he insists on at least checking the other boys, if only for their own good--but it’s one of the rare times he’ll take advantage of his superior position in the household. He feels better doing it himself.

He’s in the bathroom finishing up an enema when the idea hits him.

Kurt’s going to be prepping Hunter tonight--they decided that earlier. But he’ll be by himself, since Blaine will be busy with Jesse. He knows Hunter is perfectly capable of making sure Kurt does it right, but Blaine knows how uncomfortable Kurt has been, and how acerbic Hunter can be. Maybe it’s better if he puts aside his own discomfort and lets Kurt prep him first, just to get in practice with someone he trusts.

And Kurt trusts him. He is Kurt’s best friend.

Blaine’s heart warms at the thought. The boys in the harem are always close, to one extent or another. Their shared situation gives them a connection, but it’s different with Kurt, it has been from the start. Yes, a big part of it is Blaine increasingly undeniable attraction to Kurt, but they share a connection on a deeper level. It’s only been a few days, and he feels closer to Kurt than he has to anyone, even Jeremiah. After all, he and Jeremiah had been friends, of course, as well as lovers, but he never spent an entire day just talking to Jeremiah. He never fell asleep watching movies with Jeremiah. There was never that level of ease, mostly because they hadn’t really known each other for long enough to achieve it. But with Kurt it was instant.

He can do this. He can sacrifice a little of his comfort to ensure Kurt’s own. After all, Blaine is fairly certain that Jesse was just trying to throw Kurt off, to embarrass him and put him in a situation he doesn’t know how to handle. It’s Jesse’s style, and he’s frankly surprised that this is only Jesse’s first attempt.

He can do this.

He heads into his room and lays out his outfit for the night. It’s Sebastian’s favorite on him--tight white jeans that hug his ass, and a top entirely made of thin, black silk rope that circle his torso and down onto his thighs in a mimicry of bondage, held artfully with ornate silver clasps instead of thick knots. He adds a pair of black boots with a faint grimace--he hates shoes as a rule, and prefers to wear something easy to slip out of when he feels like it. But he’s sure the outfit won’t look good with boat shoes or moccasins, and he’d rather not attempt it.

When it’s all set, he takes a deep breath. He’ll go to Kurt’s room, let Kurt prep him, and then just come back and get dressed and go about making sure the rest of the boys are ready.

No big deal.

He heads to Kurt’s door and hears music on the other side of the door. He knocks, and waits, and gets no response.

“Kurt?”

He knocks again, but after a moment of no response, he opens the door and peeks his head in.

Kurt is kneeling next to his desk. His dildo is suctioned to one smooth side of it, at the height of Kurt’s mouth, which is wrapped around its girth. Just as he enters, Kurt sinks forward over it, drawing most of its length into his mouth, deeper than Blaine had been able to get him. He has only his thumb and forefinger wrapped around the base, and his lips almost touch them.

“Oh,” Blaine says automatically, startled at the sight and the fact that it immediately sent blood rushing down his body.

Kurt jumps and pulls off the dildo with a cough, clutching his chest and falling to the side, landing on his hip. He stares up at Blaine for a moment before panting and closing his eyes.

“Oh my god, you scared the shit out of me,” he breathes, struggling for breath.

“I’m sorry!” Blaine says, slipping in and shutting the door before heading over to Kurt and offering him a hand up. “Are you okay?”

Kurt grips his hand and rises, glaring at him a little bit.

“Well, I’m sure at least ten years were just taken off my life, but otherwise I’m fine,” he says dryly. “Don’t you knock?”

“I did, twice,” Blaine says. Kurt shuts off the music and sighs. “I could have...knocked louder?”

“It’s fine, Blaine,” Kurt says. “What’s up? Time to get ready?”

“Sort of,” Blaine replies. “I wanted to...um...”

He realizes then that this is going to be awkward. Even beyond his own reticence to allowing someone to do this, bringing it up at all is going to be uncomfortable for both of them, but he hadn’t exactly planned for this. He kicks himself for his impulsivity, debating whether or not to go on, especially with the unfortunate reactions he’s consistently having to Kurt whenever anything remotely sexual occurs.

Where did his objectivity go?

“What?” Kurt asks.

Blaine looks at him, and he’s hit with why he decided to do this. Kurt’s going through enough as it is, and Blaine’s the only one he’s comfortable with.

“I know prepping Hunter is going to be strange for you, especially since you’ll be doing it by yourself,” he says, suddenly calm and ready to face whatever Kurt’s response is as his friend. “So I thought I’d give you the opportunity to learn before you have to dive in.”

Kurt stares at him for a long moment before realization dawns on his face.

“You mean...on you?”

“Yeah,” Blaine says. The look of shock on Kurt’s face isn’t very promising, but he’s sure he should follow through on this. “After all, it’s my job to train you, right?”

“I think I could manage just doing it on Hunter,” Kurt says, his voice alarmingly high, his cheeks flaming. “Like Jesse said, it’s not hard, and I already saw you do it once.”

Blaine pauses, a little thrown by the reaction.

“Are you sure?” he asks. “I’m fine with it, it’s not--”

“No, no,” Kurt cuts him off. “I’m sure. So you can go now.”

Blaine frowns. “O-okay.”

He turns and leaves, confused and, truth be told, a little hurt, even though it’s silly. Kurt’s dismissal of him was abrupt, though, and Blaine is still trying to catch up with what happened.

“Why do you look like someone kicked your dog?”

Blaine looks up and sees Nick wandering out of the bathhouse, toweling his hair off.

“Um,” Blaine says.

“What’s up?” Nick asks, looking more and more concerned.

“It’s nothing,” Blaine says. “I was just offering to let Kurt practice prepping on me so he wouldn’t be so nervous with Hunter, and he...kind of freaked out.”

“Uh, yeah,” Nick replies, nodding like it’s obvious. “Of course he did.”

“What?”

Nick gives him an unamused look.

“Are you dumb?” Nick steps forward, lowering his voice. “It’s one thing to train him on a piece of silicone, but it’s another to expect him to actually touch you--”

“But he’s going to be touching Hunter soon!”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t have a crush on Hunter,” Nick says frankly. “You being his sexy Yoda is hard enough for him, but now you’re trying to get him to actually feel you up? No wonder he panicked.”

Oh.

Oh god.

“Kurt has a crush on me?”

Nick doesn’t even reply. He just stares at Blaine with the same serious look on his face.

“But--I mean...” Blaine pinches the bridge of his nose. “This is bad.”

“Don’t even try to tell me you don’t like him back,” Nick says. “You two look at each other like you’re about to burst into song any minute.”

Blaine immediately shakes his head.

“I can’t,” he says simply. Nick knows his story.

“It’s been years, Blaine,” Nick shoots back. “You can’t honestly tell me you think Sebastian would still be jealous of you. He barely touches you anymore.”

“But what about Kurt? He’s going to the trouble of letting me train him, it can’t be for nothing--”

“You can’t know that,” Nick says. “You know better than anyone--”

He cuts himself off as the door opens behind him. Jeff walks in, completely naked, and smiles at them.

“Ready to prep, babe?” he asks, raising his eyebrows at Nick.

“Coming,” Nick replies. He turns back to Blaine. “We’ll talk about this later. I know you’re old and wise, but you’re being stupid.”

“There’s nothing else to say, Nick,” Blaine says. “Go get ready.”

He turns and heads into his own room, his head swimming.

Kurt likes him.

Blaine can’t feel anything back. God, he wants to. He can clearly imagine himself with Kurt, feeding each other bites of food, curling up to watch movies, making love on nights off into the early hours of the morning, sleeping in each other’s arms, taking long baths and relaxing with each other. The only life they could have together--it seems so easy.

But Kurt is eight years younger than him. Kurt is beautiful, and pure, and perfect. Kurt is being trained to please their Master, a consideration that is unheard of from Sebastian. Kurt is special. Kurt is what Blaine used to be, and he can’t bear to see Kurt hurt in the way he was, claimed in the way he was, when someone else dared to touch him.

Blaine can’t dare to touch Kurt. Blaine can’t have him.

So he brushes off what Nick says. He preps himself quickly, he dresses, and he checks himself in the mirror. He applies a little eyeliner, and covers up the circles under his eyes. He focuses on his job.

He preps Jesse as well as he can before he heads out into the common room, with half an hour to spare before Sebastian’s banquet. The boys are dressed, all with the same style as Blaine--black and grey and white, fashionable variations on bondage, tight and revealing. Their hair is styled, their makeup is applied, and they all look like the expensive paragons of sexuality that they are.

Blaine deliberately doesn’t study Kurt for longer than the others, even though it’s hard. He looks like the definition of temptation in pants that hug his thighs and ass, tucked loosely into silver studded black combat boots, and nothing covering his torso but thin, shiny white suspenders. His eyes shine out from thick black eyeliner, and his hair is tousled like he’s just rolled out of an enthusiastically rumpled bed. Blaine notices that his bruise is well-covered by makeup, only the faintest discoloration visible. Sebastian won’t be able to resist him.

Blaine can barely do it himself, even though Kurt’s the only one whose pants he doesn’t have to slip a hand down.

“All right,” Blaine says when he’s finished checking them all, flinging the used latex glove into the garbage. “Let’s go.”

Sebastian smirks at Kurt and squeezes his leg once he’s done pouring the wine, sipping at it lightly before turning to Blaine where he sits on the floor, one of Sebastian’s legs pressed against his side.

“How is the training going?”

Blaine has been expecting the question. But he never expected the response that flies from his mouth without a second thought.

“He’s mastered manual stimulation, Master,” Blaine says delicately. “I’m going to be teaching him oral skills starting tomorrow.”

Kurt immediately looks over at him, but thankfully keeps a straight face. Blaine carefully avoids meeting his gaze for more than a moment, and keeps his gaze locked on Sebastian, respectfully low. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Jesse, who is seated at the foot of the couch with Sebastian’s other foot in his lap, make a face.

“Well, why don’t we speed up his lessons?” Sebastian says suggestively.

Blaine almost panics. The whole point of his impulsive lie is to slow down the deadline, to give Kurt some more time. Now, Sebastian is implying--

“Jesse,” Sebastian says. “Come here, show him how it’s done.”

Blaine breathes a sigh of relief and sits passive and waiting as Jesse crawls up the couch, dutifully opening Sebastian’s pants and pulling them down just enough to free his hardening cock.

Kurt’s eyes go wide at the sight, but he watches obediently.

Blaine, on the other hand, glances around the room. It is always customary at Sebastian’s parties for dinner to end with some kind of sexual relief, open and shameless throughout the gathering. Sebastian is in clear view of the rest of the room, supine on his couch at the head of the room, and Jesse pulling his cock out into the open air and sinking over it acts as a sign to the rest of the room.

Most of the guests brought their own slaves, but Blaine looks to the ones that did not. Jeff and Nick are wrapped up with three other men, their limbs tangling and sliding as their movements become more debauched. On the other side of the room, Hunter lifts up the skirt of a tiny woman and buries his face between her legs, eagerly drawing high gasps from her lips as she grips his hair and presses him in.

Blaine turns back, satisfied that the boys are doing their jobs, and watches as Sebastian leans his head back against Kurt’s leg and reaches up to grip it with one hand, the other reaching along the back of the couch and clutching at the frame.

“Go ahead, Blaine,” Sebastian says unsteadily, falling apart under Jesse’s skilled mouth. “Teach.”

Blaine bites his lip and nods, shifting around to kneel facing the couch. He looks up at Kurt.

“Master, could I--”

“It’s your show,” Sebastian says, cutting him off and slapping the inside of Kurt’s thigh encouragingly. Kurt slips down and kneels next to Blaine when he beckons.

“Watch how Jesse takes him in,” Blaine says. “He relaxes his throat, covers his teeth, and bobs all the way down before sliding back up. Notice he sucks when he rises. He uses his tongue, too, you can see his mouth work around it when he does.”

“I see,” Kurt says, clearing his throat uncomfortably but watching closely.

“Guide him,” Sebastian orders, nodding down at Jesse. Blaine immediately lays his hands on Jesse’s head, pushing him into a quicker rhythm that he knows Sebastian would normally do himself.

But why do it himself when he has others to do it for him?

Blaine continues to push Jesse down, matching the pace at which Sebastian thrusts up. He turns to Kurt and nods him over.

“Put your hands next to mine,” he instructs. Kurt does as he’s told. “Feel how his head moves? How he rocks back and forth instead of just going straight up and down? He can go much deeper for just an instant that way. And notice that he breathes with the movement--he catches a breath in on the way up and breathes out to open his throat when he goes down. Feel it?”

“Yes,” Kurt says, nodding.

They stop talking, and the sounds of the room drift around them. Moans and cries and begging from a multitude of voices rise up in a licentious cacophony, mingling with the scent of sweat and come thickening in the room. Blaine can’t help but get a little caught up, his heart quickening with an excitement that is blunted only by an awareness that comes with familiarity.

But Kurt next to him seems more affected. His chest rises and falls rapidly, his lips parted slightly to pull in more breath. His fingers flex slightly in Jesse’s hair, his eyes locked on the movement of Sebastian’s cock sliding between stretched lips.

Sebastian notices.

“Go ahead,” he says, reaching out and gripping Kurt’s chin, lifting and turning it so that he can see the room out of the corner of his eye. “Take a look.”

Kurt’s hands fall from Jesse’s head as he shifts, his profile coming into Blaine’s line of view even as his torso turns away, his shifting back revealed, a flush growing down his neck and shoulders. His eyes widen, and his jaw drops, and his breath stutters as his senses are overcome with the sight and smell and sound of the entire room fucking.

“Good,” Sebastian encourages in a moan, his hand dropping from Kurt’s chin to stroke at his collarbone.

Blaine watches Kurt’s face. His eyes dart around like he can’t decide where to settle, and his cheeks burn--from what, Blaine can’t tell. Excitement, embarrassment, arousal, or that and more. All Blaine can see is that Kurt is falling into Sebastian’s libertine vortex, his body responding as the tension in the room struggles to a peak.

Seeing Kurt like that--it draws Blaine in more than anything else. And so, for the first time in ages, he feels himself getting entirely lost in the cheap passion swirling in the air.

He feels sweat on his brow, and the ropes of his outfit that circle his groin grow tight, and his lungs struggle to pull in air, and his entire body feels like it’s suddenly sensitive to everything. Jesse’s hair feels sharper beneath his fingers, the floor feels harder, the air is hotter, the rope is rougher. The way Kurt’s leg presses against his own sets him on fire, and he has to look away to contain himself.

When he does tear his eyes from Kurt, he catches Sebastian’s eye. Sebastian holds his gaze, grunts falling from his lips. Blaine recognizes the signs, and he pushes Jesse’s head down all the way. Sebastian grips the couch with one hand while the nails of the other drag along Kurt’s skin, but his stare never falters as he lets go and comes down Jesse’s throat.

He’s still looking into Blaine’s eyes when he grips Kurt’s chin again, pulling him up and in for a deep kiss.

Blaine snaps away as soon as Sebastian’s eyes shut, and the room comes back into focus. There are cries and groans sounding through the room, and Blaine can sense that the action is about to wind down. But he doesn’t turn to see--he resumes watching as Sebastian’s mouth covers Kurt’s, dominating for a moment until Kurt has the sense to kiss back.

Blaine averts his eyes when Sebastian pulls away, hanging his head and struggling to catch his breath and bring himself under control.

“Oh.”

Blaine flicks his eyes back up when he hears Kurt’s soft sigh. He’s looking at Sebastian’s lips, his brow furrowed, and Sebastian asks the question Blaine wants the answer to.

“What?”

Blaine notices Kurt’s eyes drifting to the side, and he holds his breath, hoping Kurt knows better than to look over at him. But his worry lasts for only a moment before Kurt pulls back up to look at Sebastian again.

“That was my first kiss,” Kurt says.

Blaine looks away again, only to catch Jesse watching him.

Shit. How much did he notice?

Blaine tries to play it off, raising his eyebrows faintly, as though in question. Jesse’s face remains stoic, but he turns his head and watches Sebastian instead. Blaine relaxes, pulling himself together with the assurance of Kurt’s lie and Jesse’s ignorance grounding him, even as he worries about what Sebastian saw.

He can only wait as Sebastian grabs his glass of wine and downs what’s left in the glass, holding it out for a refill as he watches the party die down around him.

The boys file out, weary and most of them half-drunk, their clothes crumpled and messy where they’d been hastily thrown on after the guests had been carted away. Blaine watches them go, smiling when Kurt looks back just before slipping out with the rest.

“Blaine, come here.”

Blaine turns, smiling at Sebastian where he lazes on his couch. He approaches and starts to kneel before Sebastian like he usually does, but Sebastian stalls him.

“No, no,” he says, “up here. Come sit with me.”

Blaine is startled. He knows Sebastian is drunk and sated, and his mind may not be in entirely the state it normally is, but he’s never been on the couch with him unless he’s being fucked. He wonders briefly if that’s what Sebastian wants, even after being pleased by Jesse.

He sits down on the edge of the seat, his hips close to Sebastian’s. Sebastian reaches out and rubs a hand up and down Blaine’s arm. His head lolls on the armrest and he grins up at Blaine fondly.

“You look beautiful tonight, Blaine,” he hums. “My friends always wondered why I kept you when you got older but you’re only getting better with age. And you’re so good to me, you take care of my things so well.”

Blaine just continues to smile silently, wondering where this is going. He’s never seen Sebastian like this, not in his most liquor-soaked stupors. He’s never been this...affectionate.

“How is the training going? With...with Kurt. Tell me the truth. Will he be ready soon?”

“I’m afraid what I told you before was true, Master,” Blaine says, not the least bit ashamed of this lie, hoping his insistence will assuage any doubts Sebastian has. “Kurt is...adjusting. But he is progressing, and I’m sure we’ll be able to move onto more training soon enough.”

“Make it sooner,” Sebastian commands, his voice a little slurred. “I haven’t wanted someone so much since I first laid eyes on you, Blaine. There’s a reason you were my first slave...my first everything. You’ll always have that. But I want him like I wanted you.”

Blaine fights to keep his face neutral as he digests this. He’s filled with worry for Kurt, his firsthand knowledge of how Sebastian treats someone he wants badly rising from his memory.

“We’re going to go to my rooms,” Sebastian whispers from his past. “And you’re going to stay there with me until we can get that boy out of your memory, all right?”

“Does that make you jealous?”

Blaine frowns as he tries to catch up with where Sebastian has taken the conversation from his brief visions of years ago. It is probably the last thing he expected, and now he’s not entirely sure how to respond. He knows that he took Sebastian’s virginity, over ten years ago--he didn’t know Sebastian though it was any kind of a big deal.

He bows his head and hopes he’s reading his master correctly.

“It is not my place to be jealous, Master,” he says. “You have done me great honor by keeping me for so long, and treating me so well. I can only be grateful for that.”

“I did keep you,” Sebastian mumbles. He looks exhausted--his eyes are drooping, and they have deep circles beneath them. “I never kept anyone else.”

“I know,” Blaine whispers, offering Sebastian a smile. It’s true, after all--Sebastian could have thrown him out at any time, but he kept Blaine despite the fact that, apparently, he faced criticism for it. And in a society where your friends’ opinions are thrown around like law, that’s a big deal.

It sets up a turmoil in Blaine. For all the things that are wrong about Sebastian and the way he treats people, he’s always been good to Blaine. Except for after he found out about Jeremiah--Blaine has never endured anything like that, before or since. And he’s cared for boys that have undergone similar experiences with Sebastian.

“Do you love me, Blaine?”

He can’t. There’s a reason he can’t forgive Sebastian. If he were simply his Master, if it hadn’t happened, if he hadn’t done it to more boys after Blaine, he could probably have loved Sebastian. He’s handsome, and generous with his boys, and usually he treats them better than most slave owners in the world. But Blaine knows firsthand just how cruel he can be when he’s provoked. And Blaine can’t love a man like that.

But he can lie, even if the dishonesty churns in his stomach like poison, threatening to rise up in bile and rage and hopelessness when he leans forward to kiss his owner, sealing his untruth.

“Of course I do, Master.”

Sebastian smiles, suddenly looking less tired.

“Good,” he says. “Then I know you’ll do this because you love me, right?”

“What would you like me to do, Master?”

Sebastian moves his hand from Blaine’s arm to his chest, running down the trail of hair there with questing fingers between the ropes. He grins at Blaine mischievously.

“I want you to make the boy want to learn faster,” he says. “I can see the way he looks at you. He has a crush on you. So do what you have to do to get him trained as fast as you can.”

Blaine can’t help himself; his can feel his eyes widen, and he stares at Sebastian incredulously.

“Don’t fuck him,” Sebastian amends. “Don’t...don’t give him anything. Because...I am the only one who gets to do that. Understand?”

“Well, we’ll just have to remind you that you belong to me, body and soul.”

Blaine’s heart falls a little. Sebastian hasn’t even used Kurt yet, and he’s already possessive. Poor Kurt might end up just like Blaine--alone, with only the false affection of a cruel master and a busy schedule to stave off the the loneliness.

Blaine tries not to think about the fact that he hasn’t felt alone since Kurt came. It’s a sealed deal, now--it can never happen.

Sebastian has made sure of it.

“I understand, Master,” Blaine says. “I’ll do my best to ready him as quickly as possible.”

“My good boy,” Sebastian says, petting Blaine’s hair before dropping his hand away. “Don’t wake me up tomorrow morning. I’ll summon you.”

“Yes, Master.”

With that, Sebastian closes his eyes and drifts off right there on the couch.

Blaine waits for a moment to make sure he’s really asleep, and then signals to the guards standing by the door of the dining room. They know the drill--as soon as Blaine stands up to leave, they pick Sebastian up as gently as possible and head toward his room. He’ll have a hell of a hangover tomorrow morning, but everyone’s familiar with what happens when Sebastian holds a banquet. There will be water and plenty of hangover cures in the morning. For now, everyone but the house slaves cleaning up are heading to sleep and thanking Sebastian’s whims that they’ll get to sleep in a little.