June 23, 2014, 7 p.m.
Threadbare: Chapter 12
E - Words: 4,226 - Last Updated: Jun 23, 2014 Story: Complete - Chapters: 15/? - Created: May 18, 2014 - Updated: May 18, 2014 193 0 0 0 0
So, yeah, thats that. I based this fic almost entirely on Blaines POV, and I wanted to provide a little insight for Kurt at the end. Blaine wasnt the only one who had to make changes for their relationship to work. Watch for the epilogue in a few days, I still need to go grammar nazi on it. As always, reviews are my sunshine!
Blaine made a number of new discoveries as he settled in permanently with Kurt. Of course, his room, the pool slide, the cheesy Disney Library, all of that was undoubtedly amazing. But one revelation stood out from all the rest: sex was fucking phenomenal. How, he wondered, in all his years of screwing had he never noticed this? The answer of course, was in the eyes, and hands, and oh God, the mouth!, of one very intense, high-energy designer who looked at Blaine like he hung the stars.
Once theyd gotten over the initial awkwardness and become comfortable with each other, the pair thoroughly devoted themselves to intimately learning each other. Blaine couldnt think of an inch of skin on his body that hadnt been thoroughly explored and savored. And Blaine loved it, he really did. Kurt touched him with a gentleness and adoration hed never dreamed was possible.
But at the same time, Blaine occasionally felt...not exactly dissatisfied, but just a little off. It was hard to explain exactly what it was, but as the weeks turned to months, his occasional bouts of frustration were slowly building into anxiety.
Blaine loved the feel of Kurts weight over his body, especially those special times when Kurt quit being so ridiculously considerate, let go of his extreme self-control and just fucked Blaine through the mattress. Those instances were rare, and Kurts incessant gentleness was beginning to drive him crazy. Blaine decided he needed to deal with this discontent before it festered. He needed to try to articulate his issues to his lover. Communication had ever been the key to resolving any problems that cropped up in their unusual relationship.
Blaine was already in bed reading when Kurt dragged himself into their room. After the show, Kurt had been besieged by offers of private stores interested in carrying his clothing line. Hed privately been booked to make individual pieces for some fairly influential people. Success, on his terms, was everything hed wanted, but was beginning to wear on him.
Kurt had been in meetings all day long and just wanted to fall into bed with his gorgeous boyfriend and forget about the world for a while. And Blaine was already there, look geek chic hot in his new glasses and Kurt knew he was naked under the sheets because Blaine had been sleeping nude since they became a couple.
Kurt quickly began the squiggly dance that hed perfected to optimize removal of his super-tight skinny jeans. Blaine greeted him warmly, setting his book aside as he considered how best to articulate what was bothering him.
"You do know that Im not made of glass, right?" Blaine asked his boyfriend as Kurt plopped himself on the bed next to him. Blaine had been lying on his back but he pulled his arms up under him, partially sitting up so he could watch Kurt wiggle his hips out of his pants. Smooth, he told himself in annoyance, that wasnt confrontational at all.
"Youre gonna have to extrapolate on that one, babe," Kurt told him, voice slightly muffled as he pulled his shirt over his head. "Because Im quite sure theres nothing fragile about you. In fact," Kurts words drifted as he became distracted by other pursuits. Now that he was suitably naked, he curled into Blaines side, slowly pulling the sheet covering him away, planting kisses along the models meticulously honed abs. When he reached Blaines fine treasure trail of dark hair he began nibbling his way down.
"In fact," Kurt continued, his lips teasing the words over Blaines skin. "Everything Im finding here is firm, thick..." he pulled the sheet down past Blaines waist to expose his erection. "And very hard." Kurt finished the last words with his lips brushing against the head of Blaines cock, making it twitch in appreciation.
Blaine closed his eyes and dropped his head back, relishing the feel of Kurts mouth on his body, but he made sure to open them in time to watch his cock slowly disappear into Kurts hot mouth. If there was anything on the planet hotter then the sensation of that sweet mouth on his body, it was the visual of Kurt swallowing him to the root. Kurt refused to tell Blaine at what point hed learned to deep throat, but that didnt prevent Blaine from reveling in the benefits.
As that talented mouth went to work on him, Blaine recalled the first time his gorgeous lover had shared this particular pleasure with him. Hed never felt anything like it. True, hed had the occasional client choose to use him that way, but those instances were few and far between. And the experiences had been as different as night and day to what Kurt was making him feel. When Kurt first slid those soft, pink lips down Blaines length, hed held his gaze, never looking away as he moved. The look was pure heat, filled with desire and pleasure and so very intimate. Blaine had broken eye contact first, his head rolling back as he shut his eyes against the onslaught of sensation. Kurt took him deep and swallowed around him, humming in satisfaction at Blaines broken moan.
Previously, Blaine had just held still and waited for it to be over. With Kurt though...this was bliss. He never wanted it to end. Which made it that much worse when hed come embarrassingly quickly. His orgasm had taken him by such surprise he hadnt had time to warn Kurt. Any slight fears that tickled the edge of his consciousness that he might get in trouble for that dissipated when Kurt enthusiastically swallowed everything Blaines body had to give.
Kurt had pulled himself up to spoon in tight against Blaine, affectionately running his fingers through sweat dampened curls as he waited for his lover to recover. When Blaine opened his eyes, luminescent blue met his, sparkling with satisfaction and no small amount of pride. There was nothing for Blaine to do but roll on top of Kurt, tugging the leaner body under his own. He ignored Kurts yelp of surprise, focusing instead on kissing all the smug out his boyfriend. Hed reached a hand down between them and begun expertly stroking Kurts erection.
That had been different, too. Blaine had given more hand jobs than he could count. But it was the why of it that made all the difference, hed discovered. It completely changed everything about the experience. He wasnt motivated to please by fear of pain or hunger. Instead, it was Kurts sounds that spurred him on, the way he wantonly gave all of himself over to Blaines touch. And Blaine wanted more of it, watching Kurts beautiful face as he gave in to the pleasure he was receiving. Kurt held nothing back, his hips bucking up into Blaines fist as he moaned and begged for more. Blaine kissed him deep and filthy as he stroked. He loved the muffled sound of his name on Kurts lips, reluctantly leaving them to travel lower, nibbling and kissing along the long, pale neck exposed for Blaine to taste. He bit lightly, sucking the skin between his teeth, leaving a red mark against the pale skin. Kurt bucked against him at the sensation, unconcerned that he was being marked where anyone could see. Blaine slowly kissed his way back to Kurts mouth, claiming it in a passionate kiss. Kurt came that way, their tongues dueling in a battle that had no losers.
Looking down at Kurts sated, pleasure warmed face after hed come for Blaine was a new kind of thrill, the masculine pride of knowing he had satisfied his lover and done it well. It was nothing like the relief hed typically felt at the completion of this type of activity.
Only when Kurt had finally opened his eyes did Blaine move from his position above Kurts panting body. Without breaking gazes, he brought his own hand up, tongue darting out to teasingly lick at the cum along his knuckles. Kurt had groaned at the sight, his exhausted dick twitching in an impossible attempt to get hard again so soon.
Blaine was pulled back to the present as Kurts fingertips stroked teasingly along his inner thigh. "I mean it," he told his boyfriend, trying desperately to focus on what he was saying. He was fairly sure it was important, though he was having trouble remembering why. "Im not made of porcelain. I...I appreciate how gentle and patient youve been with me, but, oh God, yes, keep doing that, but sometimes it feels like you think Im...I dunno, damaged, I guess?" That wasnt it, really, but in trying to find the right words, Blaine realized he didnt really understand what it was that was leaving him discontent.
This was a terrible idea; Blaine decided when Kurt left off his ministrations. What the hell had he been thinking? Anything that made Kurt stop the amazing things he was doing couldnt possibly be good.
"Do I?" Kurt sounded hurt. Damn it. Blaine should fix this; reassure his amazing boyfriend that everything was fine. Except it kind of wasnt.
Blaine took a deep breath, pulling himself together. Kurt moved away completely, sitting back on his haunches. "Kurt, you are the most caring, considerate, passionate person Ive ever met. I love you so much. Sometimes though, I think you worry more about my past then I do. Its okay to come on...strong, sometimes. If I dont want to do something, I will tell you. I promise. Please, dont hesitate to reach for me when you want to touch. And you dont have to ask if Im okay five times when you top me."
"Five times?"
"Six actually, last time."
Kurt rolled away to lean against the headboard, curling into himself. "Maybe Ill worry less about your comfort level when you can go a week without calling me Master during sex!"
"What?" Did he really do that? Blaine rubbed his eyes, not doubting that he had though he couldnt specifically remember it. Blaine couldnt imagine the effect hearing that in the midst of their most intimate moments would have on Kurt.
"Why didnt you tell me?"
Kurt sighed. "You dont say it all that often, only when youre really lost to what were doing. I know that means you trust me enough to completely let go, and Im honored by that. I know I shouldnt let it upset me. Like you said, you cant undo years worth of conditioning in a matter of months."
"But if you had told me, I could work on not saying that. The last thing I want to do is upset you, especially when were making love," Blaine argued.
"I didnt tell you because I knew what youd do. Youd focus so hard on what you were saying that you wouldnt relax with me. I shouldnt have brought it up," Kurt was still curled in a ball, staring at his clenched hands.
Blaine wondered for the hundredth time if hed made the right decision talking Kurt into trying a relationship. Not that he doubted Kurt would be good to him. That was a given. It was the hardships Kurt would be put through being with him, a slave, that most upset Blaine. Hed worried about short-changing him in romance due to his status. But he hadnt really understood just how much hurt he could cause his sensitive lover with his words and actions when hed made the push for them to be more.
But hed be damned before he let go now that he had him. Blaine couldnt imagine going to bed without Kurt beside him, touching him, not having that beautiful mouth to kiss and perfect skin to taste. He loved being with Kurt, and their makeshift dates had been surprisingly creative and fun. Blaine needed to fix this.
"I love you," Blaine told Kurt firmly. He rolled up, pushing Kurts legs flat so he could straddle them. "I trust you, I want you. And Im so very sorry that Ive hurt you. Ill try to be better, but Im going to slip up from time to time. I dont even remember saying that," Blaine admitted, leaning in and kissing along Kurts ear. He nudged gently with his nose, silently asking Kurt to turn his head and grant him better access.
Kurt purred as Blaines talented mouth nibbled perfectly along his hot spots. His strong arms circled Blaines waist, pulling his body completely onto his lap. "I think," Blaine continued teasingly, rolling his hips as he spoke, "that the best way to solve this is with more sex. Im sure that if I just scream your name enough times it will start to come naturally."
Light, warm laughter followed his comments. God, Blaine loved this man. Kurt was so resilient, so easy to please. He leaned down, fixing his mouth onto a pert nipple and biting gently. "That, Oh God, Blaine! That...sounds good. Good plan. Fuck, you have some great ideas."
Blaine laved at the nipple before sliding over to work on the other. He had to be fair about these things, after all. But Kurt had other ideas. He tightened his grip around Blaines waist and flipped them so Kurt was on top.
"I think," he murmured teasingly, reveling in the naked desire burning in Blaines bright eyes. "That this whole thing was just a diabolical scheme you concocted to get fucked hard. Next time, save the angst and just tell me you want me to pound you through the mattress, hmm?"
Blaine keened when Kurt grabbed his dick and began stroking firmly. "I, ah, yeah. Youre so right. Brevity makes much more sense, in retrospect." Kurt slid back until he knelt between Blaines spread legs, pulling one ankle up close to bend Blaines knee, exposing his hole. He let go of Blaines erection so he could pop the cap on the lube hed tossed on the bed earlier. Blaine made a noise of protest when Kurt stopped stroking him, but Kurt ignored it in favor of sliding on a condom and liberally coating himself with lube.
Blaine had told him before that he didnt really need prepping; hed long ago gained sufficient control to relax his ass muscles on cue. Kurt had continued to prep him anyway, partly because he just couldnt in good conscious fuck a partner without at least a little warm up, but also because he genuinely loved the foreplay. But after Blaines comment earlier, Kurt wondered if maybe Blaine wanted it this way, while he was still tight and could really feel Kurt take him.
Kurt leaned forward until he was completely on top of Blaine, kissing him hard and sloppy. He slid one arm under the bent leg, pulling it up to rest over his arm. "You ready, my love?" He murmured against Blaines lips. Groaning low, Blaine hitched his hips, bucking against Kurts hips. "Yes, yes. Want you. Just like this. God, Kurt, please!"
Kurt didnt ask if Blaine was sure, didnt remind him that he could stop this at any time. He trusted that Blaine would be able to tell him. Instead, Kurt pushed into Blaines ass in one long glide, groaning at the tight resistance that met his thrust. Blaine had been fisting the sheets while being entered but now he lifted his arms over his head, gripping the headboard slats. He curled the leg not being used to hold him open around Kurts waist, goading him on. This was it, Blaine realized, what he had been craving. He wanted to be taken, claimed by his lover. He needed the intensity, the burn of that first entrance, feeling Kurts strong body over his. He made it clear with his words, sounds, and his body that he was good, that what Kurt was doing with him was exactly what he wanted. Kurt was alert to his lovers body language, noting how Blaine had positioned his arms, how positively he responded to this type of handling.
Kurt watched his love more carefully then Blaine knew. He didnt take the fact that Blaine had to change so much for him lightly. Hed even spoken with a psychologist, learning about the potential problems Blaine may have adjusting and what signs he should be watching for. Hed been seeing the old uncertainties come and go the last few weeks, the increase in panic attacks. Kurt had also noticed Blaines responses during intimacy, and what helped the slave truly let go of pent up stress often wasnt when Kurt gentled his attention; sometimes it was the opposite.
Kurt moved his arm out from under Blaines leg, feeling it latch around his waist with the other. He leaned forward, hissing at how his dick was forced deeper into Blaines unprepped hole as he moved. Watching his lover carefully, Kurt wrapped his fingers around Blaines wrists where he clung to the slats in the headboard, gripping tight and pressing them down into the pillow above Blaines head.
Blaine instantly reacted to the restraint, tugging his arms, trying to pull free. Kurt used his strength and the greater leverage of his position on top to hold Blaine in place despite his struggles. When Blaine felt himself held down, his eyes popped open to stare into Kurts steady gaze above him. Kurt began to roll his hips, slowly pumping deep into Blaines tight hole as he stared down into alarmed tawny eyes. Blaine began to shake, panting, as he pulled harder against the force pinning his arms over his head. When Kurt simply tightened his grip, maintaining control, Blaine let out a broken sob.
"Ive got you, baby," Kurt promised him softly, never ceasing his steady, measured thrusts into Blaines body. Whatever Blaine was feeling at being held down and overpowered by his lover, it wasnt preventing him from clutching Kurts waist with his muscular runners legs, locking his ankles and squeezing tight to keep Kurt moving inside him. After another attempt to free his arms was thwarted, Blaine dropped his head back, closing his eyes. Kurt rewarded the action, leaning down and claiming Blaines lips in a possessive kiss, his tongue thrusting in, demanding entrance. Blaine kissed back readily, parting his lips to allow Kurts tongue free reign. Blaine whimpered into the kiss, his hips rising to meet Kurts deep thrusts.
With this sign of acceptance, Kurt didnt hesitate to initiate a bruising pace, and when he found just the right angle, he began slamming hard. Blaine screamed into Kurts mouth, fighting with renewed intensity to free his arms while simultaneously clutching at Kurts waist even tighter with his legs. When Kurt again managed to overpower him, Kurt felt the tension in Blaines body bleed away, slumping beneath him as he completely submitted to the restraint. Kurt moved his mouth to Blaines neck, unerringly reaching the spot right at the shoulder where he knew Blaine loved and biting hard. Blaine cried out at the new sensation, using his abs to raise his hips higher, taking each pounding thrust deeper into his ass. He keened, the sound deep and needy, and without thought began to speak.
Kurt was on fire. He knew Blaine was gone, he barely articulated his words, mostly just moans and pants and the occasional Kurt, yes! God! Please, right there, please! interspaced with pleas to fuck me! Kurt could feel Blaines orgasm building in the way his body tensed beneath his own, shaking from the strain. He himself had been on the brink for what felt like forever.
Kurt took both of Blaines wrists in one hand and reached down between them to fist his boyfriends cock. "Come for me, Blaine," Kurt growled as he slid his hand down the hard flesh. One good stroke was all it took and Blaine was screaming, coming instantly. Kurt couldnt hold off for a second longer. He claimed Blaines mouth in a searing kiss as he came deep inside his hole, fucking Blaine hard through both their orgasms.
"Yes, Kurt, perfect. So good, Master, thank you, Master, thank you," Blaine was muttering distantly against Kurts neck as he shuddered through the effects of his orgasm. Kurt buried his face in Blaines neck, breathing in his scent, his body twitching from the intense workout and powerful orgasm. Once he regained control of his spasming muscles, Kurt reached behind him to gently unhook Blaines legs from around his waist and rose to go to the bathroom for a wet washcloth.
Blaine blearily opened his eyes a few minutes later when he realized Kurts body was no longer draped over his. Hed managed to weakly pull himself up onto his elbows when Kurt reappeared, coming out of the bathroom.
"Lay back down, babe. Just let me clean you up and well go to sleep." Blaine complied with a tired kay, rolling over so that Kurt could run the warm cloth between his cheeks and over his thighs. Even with the condom, the combination of sweat and lube would dry and itch if not dealt with. Blaine loved that someone cared enough about him to make sure he was clean. He didnt need to walk back through a crowded hallway, sticky, used, and reeking of sex, to the stairwell. He reveled in the soft touch, reassuring and comforting after such intensity.
After a moment, Kurt slid up next to him, pulling the comforter over them both. Blaine rolled onto his back, tugging Kurt to him so that he could rest his head on Blaines chest, a position he knew Kurt loved. With a sigh, Kurt sagged against his body.
"You okay, Kurt?" Blaine asked softly, running his fingers through Kurts hair. "That was something else."
"Hmm? Yeah, Im fine, more than," Kurt replied softly.
Blaine waited a beat, but Kurt didnt say anything else. He realized Kurt wouldnt let himself ask, not after their talk, but that didnt mean Blaine couldnt answer the deliberately unasked question. "Im good, too. That was exactly what Ive been needing."
He felt Kurt relax completely on his chest at the words and Blaine wrapped one arm tightly around him. "Love you, Kurt." Blaine decided at that moment that he wouldnt protest anymore when Kurt asked if he was okay, whether it be one time or a hundred, not when his lover clearly needed to hear the answer. Even if it bothered him that Kurt didnt understand that he wasnt that person anymore. He was comfortable in his place as an equal partner in their relationship.
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Kurt sighed softly as he felt his lover drift off towards sleep. Blaines body was sated and warm beneath his own, relaxed in a way Kurt hadnt previously felt from the man before. Blaine always relished the bliss following an organism, but hed never seemed quite so content and at peace as what Kurt sensed in him now.
"I love you, too," Kurt replied softly, sincerely. Kurt usually tried not to think about it too much. But Blaine did call him Master, at least once, more often than not during sex. And in his sleep, during panic attacks, basically anytime he let go of conscious thought he tended to revert. He wondered if Blaine would wake in the morning and understand the significance of their lovemaking tonight. Kurt had been well aware of what hed been doing, and couldnt deny the impact that being dominated, owned, had had on his lover.
Kurts eyes glanced over to the far side of the bed. The metal buckle of Blaines collar gleamed faintly with reflected moonlight from its place on Blaines nightstand. Kurt glared at it, momentarily resentful of what the leather strap represented, even though he was so used to the thing he seldom noticed it anymore. It was a security blanket that Blaine rarely went without during his waking hours, even at home. Hed told Kurt long ago that he only planned to wear it when he left the house, but Kurt had never held him to that promise. How could he when the simple accessory had such a strong impact on Blaines peace of mind?
Kurt finally understood that there was a strong possibility that he may in some ways always be Blaines Master. That the brutal conditioning Blaine had endured might have burned too deeply for him to escape completely unscathed. He might always need to be owned, at least on some level, in order to feel completely safe and loved.
But Blaine had made his own choice to be with him, Kurt knew that with all his heart. And if it turned out that the world had taken something from Blaine that he couldnt completely get back, well, Kurt would accept that and give his lover whatever he needed to be happy and content. Blaine was worth a little heartache.
Kurt squeezed his arms around his boyfriends warm body protectively. After a few minutes, Kurts breathing evened and he joined Blaine in sleep.