Be My Muse
Mercury-Skies
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Be My Muse: Chapter 21


E - Words: 1,312 - Last Updated: Aug 30, 2012
Story: Complete - Chapters: 35/35 - Created: May 30, 2012 - Updated: Aug 30, 2012
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Author's Notes: Warnings for severe withdrawal and substitute opiates.

Blaine insisted that Kurt shouldn't stay with him during his treatment. He argued that it wasn't something he wanted Kurt to see and that it was something he had to do mostly on his own and for himself. Kurt argued that he'd promised to be there every step of the way and that he needed to know Blaine was safe despite what he knew he'd see him going through.


Not unsurprisingly Kurt won. The Saturday of the first week Kurt had decided to check in on Blaine, see how the counselling was going and maybe work a little on their pieces. The door was open as always so he walked straight in, calling out to Blaine and chattering away about class until he heard a dull thud and he was silenced.


He should've expected it, should've insisted on staying from the very beginning. Instead he'd been convinced by Blaine's bright smile, warm skin and sweet breath that everything would be fine, that he'd be okay. Of course now he wasn't.


He could hear the shower running and he almost thought that everything must've been fine until he heard it. The very same groan he'd heard when he'd found Blaine hunched over and shivering with his first bout of withdrawal sickness. This time however, the sound left Kurt ice cold, heart pounding in his throat as he dropped everything and ran to the bathroom.


The groan soon trailed off, breaking into grating broken sobs and gasps for breath. There was no steam present when he burst into the bathroom which meant the water plummeting from the shower must've been cold. He could see the faint shadow of Blaine through the frosted glass, collapsed on the floor right under the spray. With frantic hands Kurt pushed the partition aside, falling to his knees on the hard ceramic tile.


Blaine was heaving, his entire body shaking violently as he struggled to draw in breath. With eyes shut tight, he practically convulsed under the ice cold downpour of water, his lips turning blue, skin ghostly white and soaked to the bone. Kurt screamed his name but he only blinked up at him, still slumped on the floor of the shower seemingly unable to move. Kurt scrambled to shut the shower off, completely soaked through himself from kneeling on the shower floor.


"Blaine" Kurt breathed, noticing the tears now merging with the water running into Blaine's eyes "Wh- what happened-wh?" In all honesty, Kurt didn't know what to do. His head was screaming at him to do something, take Blaine in his arms and will away all the pain but of course he didn't know how to do that. Blaine had told him about how to deal with the bouts of sickness, water, warmth and a waste bin in the near vicinity. He'd told him about how to handle muscle cramps, he needed to keep moving or rest depending on the intensity. But nothing on how to deal with something like what was in front of him.


There was no how to guide for him. No ‘How to take care of your detoxing boyfriend'. No ‘How to handle piecing the love of your life back together without breaking yourself'. Not knowing how to help, not knowing how to make it stop was Kurt's own agony. He had nothing to go on but instinct and what little experience of Blaine and withdrawal he'd already gained.


Kurt wrapped himself around him, trying to quell his shivering with his body heat and Blaine fell into him immediately, his limbs stiff and awkward. "Was hot" Blaine whispered hoarsely "burning, needed" every sentence he uttered was set on edge by the chattering of his teeth "but too long- cou-couldn't move- too cold- hurts."


Blaine choked on another wretched sob and Kurt was spurred into action, now aware of their position on the cold shower floor, soaked through and still draped in their wet clothes. "Blaine baby can you try and stand up for me?" Kurt asked, hooking his torso as Blaine futilely tried to work his aching limbs. "Can't." Blaine whined pitifully "Hurts, Kurt. Hurts so much."


Using all his strength Kurt pulled Blaine to his feet, supporting both his own and Blaine's weight and trying not to slip. He guided Blaine to lean against the sink, brushing his sopping curls off his forehead as he tried to stay upright.


"We're gonna get these clothes off and get you dry and warm again okay sweetheart?" Kurt said softly and Blaine nodded, trying to help by bringing his ice cold fumbling fingers to the buttons on his shirt. Kurt batted them away gently, undressing Blaine himself with caution and care. Before long Kurt had Blaine swaddled in towels, the wet clothes thrown carelessly into the hamper.


Kurt dried every inch of him with meticulous tenderness, passing a fluffy navy towel over his hair and face. Blaine just let him, actually actively let Kurt take care of him for once and sat back as he was wrapped in towels to perch on the sink as Kurt tended to his own state quickly.


Blaine had regained some colour but he was still shivering violently, unable to retain heat for very long. His muscles were screaming at him and even standing or moving the slightest fraction was a gargantuan effort. Noticing Blaine's drooping eyes and faltering movements Kurt carried him to bed, lifting him almost easily before placing him under the sheets. He hurried to the hall cabinet for all the blankets he could find and laid them out on top of Blaine before climbing in beside him and curling his small frame into his.


Eventually Kurt thought Blaine must have fallen asleep until he heard sniffling and looked down to see tears glistening on Blaine's then pale skin. "I'm sorry" he croaked, burrowing closer to Kurt.

"Hey don't." He replied comfortingly holding on to him just that little bit tighter "It's okay. It's gonna be okay. I'm here now."

"Thank you"


They clung to each other for the rest of the night and began to drift when they were warm again, safely nestled in each other's arms.


.oO0Oo.


The next morning Kurt called Dr Lin and asked him to visit them, seeing as Blaine was in no state to make it to Elmbank. Dr Lin was a kind man in his mid forties with blonde hair and clear blue eyes. He spoke to Blaine, bundled up in bed with Kurt beside him, without condescension and he didn't bat an eye when every now and again Kurt would place a reassuring kiss on Blaine's lips. In fact, he smiled warmly at their apparent closeness.


After checking his vitals he administered a minimal dosage of Methadone to dull some of the withdrawal symptoms and ease some of the muscle pain. Dr Lin complimented them on being such a solid support system for each other. As the opiate began to take hold, Dr Lin teased Blaine about his heart eyes and Kurt about his complete devotion to Blaine's welfare to which Blaine snorted rather loudly and muttered something about being a lucky son of a bitch in more ways than one.


Blaine began to struggle with keeping his eyes open and Kurt shot the doctor a worried look. "In some cases," he said reassuringly "Methadone can cause some lethargy and tiredness. Usually I'd recommend you try to keep him awake for a little while seeing as the opiate must have already lowered his heart rate quite considerably but it was a miniscule dosage and he is nothing short of exhausted. I think it best that we let him rest just this once."


At the mention of sleeping Blaine's eyes cracked open. "I hate sleeping" he mumbled before losing the battle and closing his eyes once more, succumbing to it, his chest rising and falling steadily. Dr Lin raised an eye brow at Kurt to which he replied simply. "Blaine and sleep don't seem to have a very good track record."


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YAY I DID! Sorry it took so long, I had some personal things to deal with but from now on we should be back on track :)

OMG I am so touched and moved by their devotion to one another - this is a beautiful love story and I'm grateful that you're writing it for us.

I feel so sorry for Blaine, I'm glad he has Kurt!