Kurt wakes up feeling numb.

He turns to his left side. Blaine is lying next to him, his hand close to Kurt’s hip. Kurt didn’t expect to share a bed with Blaine this early in the relationship, but yesterday was filled with a lot of tears, so he wanted Blaine close. Kurt must’ve fallen asleep while crying. After all, he was exhausted.

Kurt doesn’t really know what to feel.

Finn has been dead for fourteen years, but to Kurt, this is all new. How do you process the death of your nineteen year old brother?

Oh God, Kurt is in his thirties, but Finn never lived to see his twenties.

A new fresh wave of tears hits him. His brother is dead. Gone. Buried six feet under the ground. Finn died on the 13^th of July, 2013. Kurt will forever hate that date.

Kurt lies in bed, crying. Blaine is fast asleep and Kurt prefers that. He doesn’t want Blaine to see him cry right now. He turns his head away, just to be sure. His mother’s dresser is standing against the wall.

He resists the urge to get out and cry against it. That would definitely wake Blaine up, so instead he just stares at it. Kurt just hopes that his mom is looking after Finn.

After an hour or so, Kurt decides to get up. No use lying around here. He needs time and space to clear his head, but honestly, how do you process this?

Kurt puts on some clothes, finds a piece of paper to write a note, finds some cash, and he slips out of the door. He hasn’t been outside since he got back from the hospital, but now he’s desperate for fresh air.

He walks around New York City aimlessly. The city that never sleeps doesn’t care that Kurt just lost his brother.

Or, well, he lost his brother fourteen years ago, but to Kurt, it just happened. Finn just died.

Kurt breathes in the filthy New York air. He hasn’t been outside the house since he got back from the hospital. He wanted to see New York, since the city seemed familiar to him. Familiar billboards advertise unfamiliar products and brands, but that’s it.

But walking around makes Kurt realise that there are more changes. Shops have closed down. Blocks have disappeared and other buildings are brand new. There are a lot of wires above his head, and Kurt has no idea what they’re for. He didn’t see them yesterday due to the dark.

Luckily, some things are the same, although a bit altered. Many familiar brands have changed their logo’s, but they’re still recognisable.

He needs coffee, and he’s pleasantly surprised to see that Starbucks still exists, albeit with a new logo. He desperately needs coffee. It’s not enough to process that his brother died, but it’s something.

Inside, there are still plenty of barista’s, so manual jobs haven’t been taken over by robots, but there’s no proper checkout or cash register. Instead, there are pillars with huge screens that display ORDER HERE.

Kurt touches one of the screens. Of course, it’s touch screen. The menu appears with photos of the products and Kurt understands that he has to tap the items. Kurt orders a simple black coffee, but when he wants to pay, he doesn’t see place to pay with card or a slot for dollar bills. Instead, a small part of the pillar lights up, and the screen reads: HOLD SPRINGO WALLET HERE and OTHER PAYMENT OPTION.

Kurt clicks OTHER PAYMENT OPTION, but he soon finds out that the names are as unfamiliar.

“Apple pay? Apple has a currency?” Kurt sighs as he scrolls through the options.

After a while, he completely gives up. He doesn’t know how to cancel his order, but he doesn’t care anymore. The person behind him in line can fix that for him.

Fucking hell, I can’t even order a coffee

Nothing makes any fucking sense. He’s in his thirties and the world has completely changed. His brother is dead, his boyfriend is unknown to him, and he can’t even order a coffee. The latter is relatively unimportant, but on top of all the other crap, Kurt feels like that’s the last straw.

Kurt feels himself tear up again. He can’t remember the last time he felt this devastated. He feels so incredibly lost. He walks towards Central Park to just, well, sit down and cry.

He sits down on one of the benches and he puts his head in his hands. Who can he talk to? His dad, Carole and Rachel have all moved on. Sure, they still miss Finn, but to them, Finn’s death is an old wound. It might never heal, but it’s there and they’re used to it.

But Kurt didn’t have time to soften the blow. Or he did, but those fourteen years are gone. There is no standard procedure for people who experience this kind of grief.

“Kurt Hummel?”

Kurt gasps out in shock. He didn’t expect anyone to see him. He quickly dries his tears and when he looks up, two teenagers are looking at him. They look concerned.

Of course, Kurt doesn’t recognise them, but why would he know two teenagers? Kurt might never know, so, he tries to keep his voice stable. Maybe he’s supposed to know them.

“Yes?”

The two teenagers exchange some worried looks. One then says: “Look, usually we wouldn’t, like, talk to famous people-”

Wait. What?

“-but, like, are you okay? You seem kinda… I mean, no offense, you’re Kurt Hummel, but, like, we know that you have personal things going on, cause that’s what the press release said and-”

“What my friend is trying to say,” the other person cuts in, “Are you okay? You don’t look well.”

Kurt’s mind is spinning. Famous? Press release?

“No, but thank you for asking,” Kurt says calmly, “I think I am going home.”

“Oh, of course.”

Kurt says a quick farewell and he tries to make his way back home as fast as possible.

What just happened?

Unfortunately, he’s been wandering aimlessly for too long, so it takes a long time for him to find home.

When Kurt reaches the apartment building, he rings the bell, since he’s forgotten to take his keys.

“Kurt?” Blaine’s voice sounds tired.

“It’s me. Let me in,” Kurt says and the door buzzes. He wants to go home. Sure, home is unfamiliar, but so is New York.

Kurt goes up the elevator and Blaine’s already standing in the doorframe of the front door. “You had me worried,” Blaine says when he sees Kurt, “You’ve gone rogue.”

“Yeah, well, my brother is dead,” Kurt snaps.

Blaine’s eyes widen. “No, no, I mean, uhm, ‘gone rogue’ means something else, like, it means that, I mean- Gah.”

Blaine stumbles over his words for a few more seconds, before he completely gives up and goes inside. Kurt watches him go and he counts to ten. It’s understandable that Kurt is mad, but it’s not okay to let it all out on Blaine.

Kurt goes inside and Blaine is holding something. Kurt’s breath hitches when he sees that it’s the invitation to Finn’s funeral.

“I put this in the office,” Blaine says sadly, “Normally, it’s on your mother’s dresser. Do you, uhm, want to put it back there?”

Kurt takes the small card and shakes his head. “No. The dresser is the only thing that I recognise. I want to keep it that way.”

“Of course.”

Instead, Kurt puts it on the windowsill. The small photo of Finn makes him almost tear up again.

He turns back to Blaine and asks: “What does going rogue mean then?”

Blaine looks a bit taken aback. “We don’t have to talk about it. You can- I mean, you are obviously grieving.”

“Distract me with your futuristic knowledge.”

“Well, it’s not exactly futuristic-“

“Blaine.”

“Yeah, sorry. Uhm, ‘going rogue’ means that you’re going outside without identifying tech on you,” Blaine explains and he holds up his bare wrist, “I am not wearing any, since we’re inside, but usually people wear a Springo or something similar here. Or a phone. Your phone is enough, but people like to use their Springo’s as well. Oh, wait, you don’t know what a Springo is.”

Kurt shakes his head. He’s starting to regret asking Blaine, but he lets it slide.

“Springo has many features. Do you know PayPal? Springo Wallet is the continuation of PayPal. No one uses cards or cash anymore, only at smaller shops that still can’t afford a El-Pay point. That stands for electronic payment. You just press your Springo or something similar against it and you’ve paid. Things like a Springo or an Apple watch or a phone have location services. There are wires around all of New York now. Those are probably new to you as well, but they constantly detect location. Location services have gone from wireless to wires, can you imagine it?”

“People are constantly tracked? And people are okay with that?” Kurt asks indignantly.

“Well, there was obviously a lot of resistance when it got introduced in 2021. That’s why there are wires now. Before the wires, location could be tracked everywhere, but now, that’s gone. Only wires can pick up the signals. That was the agreement: location tracking would become more mandatory on phones and other devices under the condition that it’s limited. No one can track us in our apartment, since we don’t have wires in our house. That, and you can ‘go rogue’. The location service is mandatory on your devices, but you don’t need to carry those. Without tech on you, you’re untraceable.”

“Why hasn’t everyone gone rogue, then?”

Blaine shakes his head. “This is just… how it is. I know it might sound weird and scary, but we both remember the time where our parents wouldn’t let us use the internet. Our parents remember the time where our grandparents wouldn’t let them use TV. It’s not perfect and there are known privacy affairs, but the last big one was in 2025. Your Springo has become your ID and your wallet and bus card, subway ticket and basically everything. It’s more convenient to have one Springo and one phone with you instead of an entire wallet filled with cards and cash.”

“Okay, yeah,” Kurt says shortly. He really, really regrets asking, but what can he do? He’s fifteen years into the future. Until his memories come back, he has to get used to it.

Blaine notices the change of mood. Of course, he notices. Blaine probably knows Kurt better than he knows himself. Blaine’s about to reach out, but Kurt turns around. Talking about current affairs make him feel miserable, but talking about Finn also makes him miserable. He can’t seem to win. Besides, Blaine’s never met Finn.

Kurt wants his mom. His mom has also never met Finn, but at least she won’t remind him of the fifteen years he’s lost. Kurt sniffs and leaves the room.

Blaine knows him well enough, so he doesn’t follow him to their bedroom. Kurt sits down in front of his mother’s dresser. He doesn’t cry, since he feels like he’s run out of tears, but sitting here just feels enough.

Kurt finds a small layer of dust, so he wipes it clean with his sleeve. Swipe left. Swipe right. Swipe left. He doesn’t understand why, but the small task makes him feel accomplished and despite everything, a small smile appears on his face.