Blaine has taken Kurt’s phone, but Kurt can use Blaine’s to call his dad. As expected, landlines have almost completely disappeared from the Earth. Blaine’s told Kurt that Burt and Carole moved to a smaller condo in the suburbs in 2020, so they cut off their old landline and switched completely to mobile.

Blaine has Burt Hummel listed as ‘dad 2’ in his phone. It makes Kurt heart ache, since it reminds him of the fact that he’s missing fifteen years of his life.

His dad picks up fairly quickly.

“Hey Blaine, good morning, you usually never call this early.”

His dad sounds so casual. He truly knows Blaine well. Blaine must not be an early bird, since Rachel said the same thing yesterday.

“D-dad?” Kurt asks and he hates that his voice breaks on that one damned word. He’s not going to cry. He’s definitely not going to cry in front of Blaine or his dad.

“Kurt, hey, didn’t expect to hear you,” Burt says happily, “Kid, don’t tell me your own phone needs a new battery. Kurt, I keep telling you to throw that thing away-”

“Dad!”

“Hm? Yes?”

Kurt looks at Blaine, who’s sitting next to him. They’d practised this beforehand. Kurt is supposed to casually mention that he has a huge memory loss. They know it’s weird to drop a bomb on Burt like that, but it’s best to just rip off the band-aid.

But now, Kurt’s mind is blanking.

“Kurt, you there?”

Blaine looks at Kurt intensely. When Kurt nods, Blaine gets up and he takes the phone from Kurt.

“Hey Burt, it is me,” Blaine says warmly.

“Blaine, is something wrong? Where is Kurt?” Burt asks. Blaine must’ve put his phone on speakerphone, since Kurt can hear him.

“Kurt is here, he’s fine,” Blaine says and he puts his hand on Kurt’s tight. When he realises what he’s done, he wants to move away, but Kurt stops him. Kurt wants him here. “Well, uhm, not completely fine, but not in danger.”

“Blaine.”

“Yeah, okay. Kurt has amnesia. Yesterday, I found him lying on the kitchen floor, so I took him to the hospital. He thinks he’s nineteen years old and that it’s 2012. Apart from that, he is completely fine.”

And to Kurt and Blaine’s utter shock, Burt starts to laugh.

It’s a long, barking laugh. Burt sounds hysterical and both Kurt and Blaine kind of look at each other in shock. They did not see this kind of reaction coming. Does Burt think they’re messing with him?

After a while, Burt calms down, but he’s still wheezing a little bit when he says: “Oh, God, sorry. Kurt, son, remember when you were a kid? You and your mom watched this shitty romcom about amnesia.”

Kurt shakes his head. “No?”

“Ah, well, you were very young, but I will never remember the moment you turned towards your mother and said: ‘mama, if I ever lose my memories, please make sure that I still wear nice clothes’. Like, you were such a tiny kid and all you cared about was fashionable clothes.”

Blaine snorts at that as well. “Yes, that sounds like Kurt.”

Kurt truly cannot remember this, but he finds himself grin as well.

“Sorry, oh wow, this is not funny, but I just- you were such a peculiar and cute child, Kurt,” Burt says, still laughing a little bit, “I remember you turned back to the screen and your mother and I shared an amused look. God, we love you.”

Kurt finally chuckles as well. This entire situation is absurd, but of course, his dad finds a way to lighten the mood. Maybe this will go smoother than expected.

Burt coughs. “Okay, amnesia.”

Kurt and Blaine take turns explaining what has happened. Kurt tells his father how he woke up on the floor and how Blaine found him. Blaine recalls the entire time at the hospital. Throughout the story, Burt asks small questions.

“So, no one really know what is going on?” Burt asks when Kurt and Blaine are finished.

“Unfortunately,” Kurt grumbles.

“All we can do is wait,” Blaine answers.

“Oh,” Burt sounds a bit disappointed, “Can I talk to Blaine? Privately?”

Kurt looks at Blaine in surprise, but then he nods and he watches Blaine leave the room with the phone. Kurt’s left in the living room. He is a bit lost for words. His dad has things he doesn’t want Kurt to know, but he’s fine with telling Blaine? Kurt doesn’t even know this guy.

Then again, his dad probably does.

It’s weird. It’s another reminded that Kurt is missing fifteen years of his life. He probably should know Blaine’s family, although they agreed to keep it secret for now. Besides, hopefully, Kurt will regain his memories soon. Kurt just really wanted to tell his dad.

After a few while, Kurt decides to do the one thing he’s not supposed to do. He’s going to find Blaine. He blames the mix of curiosity and boredom for that.

Kurt’s not surprised to hear Blaine’s voice coming from the office. Despite his judgement, Kurt leans closer.

“Christ, Burt, I don’t know!” he hears Blaine. He sounds very fed up. “There isn’t really a standard protocol for this. I can’t just tell Mimi to order a guide called ‘How to Deal With Your Partner Losing 15 Years of Their Life’. It’s amnesia, Burt. I always thought it was some sort of fictional creed, made up for movies and tv shows.”

A moment of silence. Kurt assumes that his dad is speaking. Blaine’s probably turned off speakerphone.

“I just have no idea how to deal with this,” Blaine says. The annoyance is gone, but now he just sounds defeated. “I don’t want Kurt to be overwhelmed, and this news is a lot. I was kind of planning on waiting for Kurt to regain his memories?”

Another moment of silence. Kurt really wishes he could hear his dad. He has no idea what they’re talking about, but it sounds serious.

“Do we really want to do this if it’s avoidable? Don’t we want Kurt to feel happy and careless for now?”

Silence. Then a very long sigh from Blaine.

“I know that we promised each other to not keep secrets!” Blaine says loudly, “But how can we keep that promise if Kurt doesn’t even fucking remember making it?”

More silence, except for some footsteps. Blaine is pacing around the room.

“The most harrowing new fact should be Sue Sylvester’s planned run for her second term of presidency, Burt, not this!”

Another sigh.

“No, I get that. Of course. I just… this is going to be very ugly. I’ll go see him.”

Kurt quickly leans away. He can hear Blaine walking, so he just yells: “Blaine? Are you in here?”

There’s no chance that Kurt can go back to the living room in time. Best to let Blaine believe that Kurt just got there. He’s just in time, since the door to the office opens and Blaine’s smiling at him.

“You got bored?” Blaine asks. All traces of annoyance and sadness are gone.

“How did you know?” Kurt says teasingly.

Blaine raises one eyebrow and Kurt’s smile disappears for a second. Of course, Blaine would know. They’ve been dating for eight years. Blaine probably knows all of Kurt, whereas Kurt barely knows Blaine.

“Oh. Yes, of course.”

“Let’s go to the living room. Your dad, Carole and I have to tell you something and you might have to sit down for this.”

After greeting Carole, who’s also on the other side of the line, Blaine puts the phone on speakerphone and he puts it down on the table. He takes a deep breath.

“Is there something wrong?” Kurt asks. He really, really has a bad feeling about this. Blaine sounded incredibly sad and stressed earlier, and now he’s looking at Kurt with such pity.

There’s a small moment of silence and it looks like Blaine’s trying to find the words. Burt beats him to it, though.

“Kurt, son, we have something to tell you. The three of us debated on whether or not we should tell you, or wait for your memories to come back, but since we might not know how long that will take, we’ve decided that we want you to hear this from us.”

Okay, now Kurt’s really getting worried. What is so important and devastating that they have to do all of this? It’s as if someone died.

Blaine moves closer and he puts his hands on Kurt’s. He waits for Kurt to push him away, but Kurt hasn’t so far, so why start now?

“What is it?” Kurt asks. He really does not like this.

“Kurt, honey,” Carole sounds so, so exhausted, “It is about Finn.”