Chapter 21

Every time Kurt saw Blaine, he couldn’t help but smile. Something changed in his boyfriend since he agreed to go to Ohio with him. He always laughed or at least smiled widely; he watched a lot of Christmas movies with Kurt and actually enjoyed them.

“Who would ever want to steal Christmas?” he asked when they were watching ‘How the Grinch Stole Christmas’.

“Says a person who has never celebrated Christmas,” Kurt giggled. “You seem to be enjoying these movies way too much.”

“I need to learn about the traditions and stuff,” he said vaguely and laughed. “I don’t want to look like an idiot in front of your family.”

Kurt shouldered him playfully. “My family is going to love you. Besides, Finn already knows that you are an idiot. No need to pretend not to be.”

“Oh you think you are so funny, Hummel,” Blaine said and started tickling him.

Kurt laughed and tried to get away from him but it was impossible. Blaine was still much stronger and he was on top of him so there wasn’t much Kurt could do. After a few moments Blaine stopped and they both giggled looking at each other. Kurt licked his lips and looked Blaine in the eyes.

“Kiss me?” he whispered and Blaine willingly did that.

It was a slow kiss, full of emotion that none of them wanted to name just yet. Blaine was ready to say it but he was afraid that it could scare Kurt off. Kurt already had a plan – he wanted to say it on the New Year’s Eve. Call him silly, but he wanted it to be perfect. And starting the next year with a love confession seemed to be nothing less than perfection.

<~*~>

The following day Kurt was ecstatic. Just in two days he would go home for Christmas with Finn and Blaine. Despite that, a few things worried him.

First of all, he knew that Carole was very excited to meet his boyfriend but Burt didn’t say anything. That worried Kurt even though Finn assured him that the man would be happy once he got to know Blaine. Kurt had to agree with his brother – after all, Blaine was a really charming guy. Nevertheless, the boy couldn’t help but think of possible scenarios of the holiday, each worse than the previous one.

Another thing that bothered Kurt was the fact that James would be coming and staying a night with them. They were good friends and Kurt really missed him but he wasn’t sure if it was a good idea for his ex-boyfriend to meet the boy who had his heart now. Blaine told him he was okay with that because no matter what, James was Kurt’s friend and he wanted to get to know people who Kurt cared about. But it still bugged Kurt. He remembered how the boy reacted when Dave hit him so he was afraid of what may happen if Blaine got carried away and felt too possessive.

He was also nervous of who they may meet in Lima. To be precise, he was afraid they might meet his tormentors from school. If they picked on them, anything could happen. They were mostly jocks so they would definitely underestimate Blaine’s strength. Kurt always joked that Blaine’s height was perfect because people had no idea how strong he was.

Kurt was lost in his thoughts; his legs were carrying him without even thinking or looking where he was going because he already knew the building well enough. Another person was probably doing the same thing because they both didn’t see the other one and crashed into each other.

“Sorry,” that person uttered and was about to continue walking.

“Noah? What happened?” Kurt asked having noticed that Noah didn’t look like himself.

The boy closed his eyes and inhaled deeply to compose himself, before he could speak. “Dave is dead,” he said as calmly as he could.

“Oh god, I’m so sorry,” Kurt put his hand on Noah’s shoulder, hoping it would be taken as a comforting gesture. “What happened?”

“I don’t know. I was just told that he had died because we worked together a lot and Tom knew we were friends,” Noah shook his head and it must have been because of something he was thinking because it didn’t fit the conversation. “It’s a part of a job, I know, but it’s still very weird…”

“You are allowed to mourn, Noah. He was your friend, it’s understandable. Just because you are a tough guy, doesn’t mean you can’t feel anything. And death is not something you get used to; it doesn’t matter if it’s a part of your job,” Kurt spoke gently, trying to soothe the boy.

Noah gave him a weak smile but didn’t look into his eyes. “I’ve never actually apologised for what I did, for what we did.”

“Don’t worry, it’s okay,” Kurt smiled as well.

“It’s not. We shouldn’t have acted like that. We were stupid, I’m so sorry, and–”

“Noah. Look at me, please,” he asked him and waited until the boy did that. “Now listen. Yes, you were jerks but it’s in the past. Now I like to think of you as a friend. I have forgiven you and Dave long ago. Let’s move on, okay?”

Noah simply nodded. “I knew you were cool, but didn’t know you were that awesome,” he said.

“Well, you are lucky to have me,” Kurt smiled, happy to see that he actually helped Noah to calm at least a little bit.

<~*~>

Tom: I need to see you in my office now.

Blaine looked at the text and it seemed that something cold was dropped into his stomach. He had a bad feeling about that; it couldn’t mean anything good. As he was approaching the man’s office, he saw Tom coming from the different direction.

“What’s happening?” Blaine asked.

“Let’s get inside,” Tom said and they did just that.

Blaine sat down feeling nervous. “Can you explain what’s going on?” Blaine broke the silence.

“Remember Dave?” Tom asked.

Blaine shrugged. “This name is pretty popular. Which one are we talking about?”

“Noah’s friend. Remember? Okay. Well, he was working undercover for a few months here in England. Everything was going on really well. He had almost enough evidence to send that whole family to prison,” Tom said and even though Blaine had no idea what he was talking about, he didn’t say a thing. “There was a fight between two gangs and long story short Dave got shot. Died instantly.”

Blaine nodded but didn’t say anything. He didn’t like Dave but he was a really good agent and didn’t deserve to die. Especially not shot like some animal.

“I want you to change him,” Tom said and Blaine thought he hadn’t heard him correctly.

“What?”

“You are going to go take his place,” he said simply taking some papers.

“Um… what exactly was his place?” Blaine asked trying to stay professional as always.

“A bodyguard. We have other agents there but Dave was closest to the family. He lived with them to provide twenty four hour protection. One of the family’s advisers will hire you as a new bodyguard,” he explained and gave the papers. “Here is everything you need to know. Read it tonight. You are leaving tomorrow; I will give you the address then. You can go now.”

Blaine stood up and wanted to leave but he couldn’t not to ask. “When am I going to come back?”

Tom shifted in the office chair. “If everything goes well, you should come back by the time Kurt comes back from Ohio so you can continue working with him. If you don’t, I will appoint a new supervisor so don’t worry,” he smiled and waved Blaine to leave.

<~*~>

Blaine entered his apartment and found Kurt there drawing something. “What are you doing?” he asked and looked at the paper Kurt was working on.

“Sketching, a little something. There will be no classes until we come back from Ohio so I thought I could sketch some clothes because of how much free time I have. Come here, join me,” he smiled at the boy and patted the spot next to him on the couch.

But the smile didn’t fool him. Something was wrong. “What is it that you are not telling me?” he finally said not sitting down.

Kurt sighed. “I talked to Noah. He told me that Dave had died. And he also apologised for being a jerk when I came to the C.A.T. By drawing I was actually trying to keep my mind off things.”

Blaine nodded but didn’t say anything. He started to play with the papers absentmindedly.

“Let’s not talk about it. I wanted to talk to you about something though. We still haven’t decided about the whole ‘boyfriend from the university’ thing. Like where we met, what you are studying, where you are from… I haven’t told my parents much so they will interrogate both of us. That’s why I made a questionnaire so we can prepare our answers. We can decide all the things together and memorise what we have to say. Do you have time now?”

Blaine inhaled deeply. “I’m not going,” he said quickly but it didn’t make it less painful.

“What do you mean? Of course you are,” Kurt giggled. Blaine must have been making fun of him.

“I’m replacing Dave. I’m leaving tomorrow. Now I need to go through these,” he said waving the hand that was holding papers. “Goodnight.”

Not giving the boy a second to digest the new information he went to his bedroom and shut the doors. Kurt stayed appalled by the news, not moving his eyes from the spot where Blaine was standing. After a few moments he realised he needed some answers but judging by the slam of the doors, he couldn’t ask Blaine.

Kurt: What do you know about Blaine replacing Dave?

Jeff: What are you talking about?

Kurt: Shit.

<~*~>

After a few hours Blaine left the bedroom. He felt guilty for taking it all out on Kurt.

“Hey,” he said silently, trying not to startle the boy who was still sitting on the sofa, facing a different direction.

“Hi,” Kurt said turning around to look at him. He crossed the room quickly and hugged his boyfriend.

“I’m so sorry, Kurt, I shouldn’t have acted the way I did,” he said tightening his grip.

“It’s okay, you needed some space,” Kurt smiled. “Do you want to tell me what is going on?”

Blaine closed his eyes. “Tom wanted to see me so I went to his office. Apparently Dave was killed during the mission he was on. It was going to the end and now they want me to finish what he had started. It shouldn’t take long. But if I’m not here when you come back from Ohio, Tom will appoint you a new supervisor,” Blaine tried to sound casually and attempted a smile but failed.

“I don’t want anyone else,” Kurt whispered.

“I know,” Blaine kissed his cheek softly.

There was a moment of silence. “When are you leaving?” Kurt asked resting his head on Blaine’s shoulder.

“Tomorrow in the morning,” he answered.

Kurt nodded and released Blaine. “I need to do something,” he said and kissed the boy but not for long.

Blaine looked confused as Kurt went to the bedroom. He wanted to follow him but just like Kurt gave him space, he wanted to give that for Kurt. So he sat down and thought of everything he had read.

“Blaine, could you, please, come here?” a voice from the bedroom made him come back to reality and he went to the room.

He wasn’t prepared for what he found there – Kurt was lying on the bed, completely naked, stroking his hard cock with a hand slick with lube. Blaine was standing in the doorway, feeling himself getting harder with every Kurt’s slow stroke.

“I wouldn’t mind if you joined,” Kurt grinned and Blaine took his clothes off as quickly as possible. They both may have been sad but they needed to feel each other before separating for god knows how long.

He joined Kurt and moved his hand away so that he could have an access to Kurt’s long cock. “You are gorgeous, Kurt,” Blaine murmured kissing the boy’s jaw line. “So hot… so hard for me…”

“Only for you,” Kurt whispered and thrust his hips up into Blaine’s fist. “I want to feel you.”

Blaine bit Kurt’s lower lip and released him. He slowly lowered himself and aligned their cocks together. They both moaned in unison as the lube gave a perfect friction. They rocked like that for a minute until Blaine stopped and raised himself.

“Blaine… please, I… fuck, I need you…” Kurt begged and made Blaine smirk. The sound of Kurt begging was more beautiful than any music.

He started kissing Kurt’s neck, going down to his right nipple. “So James is coming to visit you in Ohio,” he stated teasing the nipple with his tongue.

“Blaine, I don’t like him anymo–” Kurt started suddenly startled by the topic. “Oh…” Blaine brushed his nipple with teeth which made him shiver.

“When he hugs you,” Blaine said moving towards his other nipple, never leaving the skin untouched, “I want you to see me sucking your neck. When he talks to you, I want you to hear me moan your name. When he sits next to you, I want you to imagine me stroking your huge cock. When he eats, I want you to see me sucking you. When he touches you with his fingers, I want you to feel this.”

“Oh dear god!” Kurt shouted in surprise and pleasure as Blaine slowly pushed his finger slick with lube from stroking Kurt’s cock, into a tight hole.

“And every night when he goes to the guest room,” Blaine continued, moving one finger in and out slowly, sucking and nibbling a spot on his inner thigh in between words. “I want you to go to your room and think of all the things you would like me to do. Imagine I’m with you,” he added another finger, “and touch yourself.”

“I will… Oh god, I will,” Kurt said in a low voice, fucking himself on Blaine’s fingers. “Please, Blaine…”

“What do you want?” he asked biting hard on the spot.

“Make love to me,” he whispered and Blaine froze. He slowly made his way to Kurt’s lips, keeping the pace of fingers.

“No, baby, not yet,” he said and kissed him, quickening the pace a bit to drive the other boy crazy. “I don’t want it to happen just because I’m leaving and you are worried. We will have a lot of nights in the future for love making. Just wait for me, please.”

Kurt didn’t say anything; his hand made its way to Blaine’s hair and he pulled him closer in a heated kiss. Blaine moaned and slowed his finger to add the third finger. Kurt hissed but continued to fuck himself on Blaine’s hand. He spread his legs as wide as he could so that Blaine’s fingers could reach deeper.

“Come for me,” Blaine said hoarsely after a while and Kurt shouted his name coming hard between their chests. Blaine slowly removed his fingers and kissed Kurt once more.

“Your turn,” Kurt whispered when he came back to reality.

Blaine giggled. “Things you do to me, Kurt…” he said and Kurt looked down – the amount of come couldn’t be one person’s. “I will go get a cloth.”

He came back, cleaned Kurt and then himself. He threw the cloth somewhere and lay down next to the boy, covering them both with a duvet. He wanted to say ‘I love you,’ he really did. But it wasn’t the right moment. He needed to wait for the perfect moment and saying it out of desperation would have ruined it. Blaine just hoped he would be able to say the three words soon.

<~*~>

Kurt woke up in the morning and found Blaine reading the same papers as the night before. He wanted to see anything that was written there but Blaine noticed that Kurt had woken up too quickly and he didn’t have a chance.

“Good morning,” Blaine said and kissed Kurt’s forehead.

“Morning,” he said and looked at the boy who looked very tired. “Have you had any sleep?”

Blaine sighed. “No. I had to memorise everything,” he said and a tense silence fell.

Please, go home with me, Blaine.

I want to go with you, Kurt.

“When are you leaving?” Kurt asked the same question as yesterday.                  

“In three hours. I already packed, I just need to see Tom,” Blaine explained.

Silence again. “Okay,” Kurt said after a while.

“I’ll see you soon, I promise,” Blaine smiled trying to ignore the tension between them.

“I’m not saying goodbye to you,” Kurt said, stood up, and left the room. He stopped for a second in the doorway but changed his mind and simply left.

The unspoken words hung between them. What am I supposed to do if you never come back?