Dec. 30, 2012, 5:44 p.m.
Blaine Little: Chapter XX
T - Words: 1,618 - Last Updated: Dec 30, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 26/26 - Created: Aug 05, 2012 - Updated: Dec 30, 2012 711 0 0 0 1
He hadn't noticed how quiet the boy was until he spoke five minutes in.
'Sebastian, have you ever been in love?'
Sebastian paused mid-lick.
'Many times,' he said, resuming his task.
'Really?' Blaine turned on his side and looked up at him. Sebastian sighed and moved back as Blaine waited patiently for an explanation.
'Whenever a cute little kitten crosses my path, I get these…feelings within me that I can't quite explain. It goes away twenty minutes after we've met. Happens every time.'
'Um…I wouldn't call that love, Sebastian,' Blaine replied.
'Call it what you want,' Sebastian said. 'But that's love to me.' He released his tongue past his lips, hoping that the conversation was over so that he could go back to his licking.
'All right, how about a different scenario. Have you ever wanted someon...something so bad but it was the one thing you knew you couldn't have?'
'Give me an example,' Sebastian said, stealing a speedy lick while Blaine was on his back.
'Okay…say you really wanted a piece of Carole's lemon meringue pie.'
Sebastian's ears pricked up with interest. 'Go on.'
'And it's freshly baked, but you're not allowed to have it.'
'Is it in the refrigerator?' Sebastian asked. That could make things complicated.
'Uh…let's say no, in this instance.'
'Then I'd still have it,' Sebastian replied, matter of factually. 'I would climb up on to the kitchen table, or the windowsill and take a bite.'
'Even if Carole banned you from the kitchen?'
Sebastian scoffed, moving away from Blaine and letting his tail flop on a cushion. 'Who cares? It would still be worth it. If you want something that badly, you go out and get it. To hell with the consequences; you deal with that stuff later. ' He glanced down at Blaine with a smirk as the small boy stared back at him. 'Luckily I won't have that problem.'
'And why is that?' Blaine asked curiously.
'You understand me, Sugarpuss,' he said, stalking back over to Blaine. 'I can ask you to sneak me a little piece. And besides,' Sebastian continued, placing a wide lick across Blaine's cheek as the boy shivered. 'You're better than any pie I've tasted.'
'What's on your mind, Blaine?'
Kurt had asked him that very question that morning, and it had been repeating itself in Blaine's mind ever since. Blaine did know what was on his mind, and it was something that had come as a bit of a shock to him. He couldn't use the tiredness excuse anymore so he lied and told Kurt he was a little nervous about the Warblers performing at Regionals without his presence. Kurt said that he had the same feeling about his glee club as well, and suggested they could go and watch them both perform in a few days' time.
Kurt was doing his nightly skincare routine in the bathroom mirror early because, he had argued, he couldn't be bothered bringing all of his products to Rachel's. He had been invited to a sleepover at Rachel's house, along with his other friend Mercedes. Blaine had been invited to come along but he declined, saying that it would be nice for Kurt to spend some time with his friends. He could sense Kurt's excitement at the prospect of spending time with the two girls later that night as he bounced a little on the balls of his feet. His eyes were sparkling and he was rubbing lotion into his skin with more enthusiasm than usual.
'…and popcorn always makes an appearance, in fact I'd say it was mandatory,' Kurt said, concentrating on an area below his eye. 'We have so much to catch up on since Regionals is happening this week. I know they're going to try and convince me to come back to McKinley.' He paused to squeeze some lotion out of a tube of moisturizer. 'I have kind of been thinking about it lately.'
'That's great, Kurt,' Blaine said. Kurt had changed a lot since he first spied him in the hallway at McKinley. Blaine was very much in awe of Kurt's transformation No longer did he fumble over his words and refuse to leave the house for days at a time. Instead, he was replaced with a more confident, content young man who looked Blaine in the eye when he spoke and was not afraid to voice his own opinion.
But at the same time Blaine remembered the words he spoke to Kurt months ago when they were at Dalton and Kurt tentatively asked him how long he could stay.
As long as you want me.
Blaine knew this day would come eventually; he watched the other boy chatting animatedly about the sleepover and Kurt had already made up his mind for him.
Kurt didn't need him anymore. He was strong enough to stand on his own two feet and go back to McKinley, Blaine to Dalton. Blaine's heart felt heavy as he thought about it, but he tried to be happy for him. He watched Kurt with a sad smile from his position sitting on the ledge of the bathroom mirror.
'So I've already packed for the night and should be back just in time for brunch,' Kurt was saying as he turned off the tap and placed a plug in the sink hole. He turned on the cold water and let it fill up the basin. 'Actually…I am still deciding between my burgundy and my navy silk pajamas. I thought you could give me an opinion...Blaine?'
Blaine shook himself out of his reverie. 'Sure,' he replied half-heartedly. He reasoned that he could still keep in contact with Kurt through Facetime after he left. He knew Carole and Burt were always checking up on his whereabouts and Finn would want to hang out with him from time to time, for novelty's sake. Sebastian would be devastated, though he would try to brush it off. Kurt would go on living his own life and return to singing at his glee club. Blaine would do the same, but he would miss Kurt terribly.
Blaine shook his head. No, he couldn't jump to conclusions. Because while Kurt may have changed, something had changed within him too. It was the way he felt about Kurt. It may mean that he would have a silly schoolboy crush on Kurt for a long time, but Kurt needed to know. He had to let Kurt know about his feelings before he left.
Blaine was fighting a battle within himself. How would Kurt react? Would he take pity on him and smile? Would he shake his head sadly if Blaine told him he could be his tiny boyfriend…maybe forever? Would that even be enough?
'I'm going to grab my hair gel and I'll be right back,' Kurt said, lifting Blaine from his thoughts again as he turned off the tap. 'Are you sure you don't want to come over to Rachel's tonight?'
'Yeah,' Blaine said softly, looking up into Kurt's warm eyes. 'You go and have fun.'
'Don't miss me too much while I'm gone,' Kurt said jokingly as he began to walk away but to Blaine it felt like a pang to his heart. He was going to reply but the other boy had already left the bathroom. Blaine made a noise of frustration and put his head in his hands.
Kurt was leaving soon for the sleepover and it wasn't the best time to lay something so heavy on him, but Blaine couldn't take it anymore. His hidden feelings had been swirling around in his chest for days and days and if he didn't talk to Kurt soon, he felt as though he might burst. He hopped down off the ledge and walked across the edge of the basin, calling out as loud as he could.
'Kurt, there's something I need to tell y-'
Blaine didn't notice the puddle of water that had dripped around the basin until he had stepped in it. He skidded and fell forward, hitting his head with a loud bang on the side of the chrome tap. He slipped off the edge of the basin and fell into the water.
The cold water immediately penetrated his layers of clothing as he found himself sinking, his head pounding from the impact with the tap. He felt disoriented; he knew how to swim, but he didn't know which direction lead him upwards to the surface. He was struggling to hold his breath when a series of moving images began to flash before his eyes.
Suddenly he was watching his own life as an observer; his mother smiling over his shoulder while he placed sprinkles on his birthday cake; Mrs Frederick measuring him for some new clothes; bowing to applause after auditioning for a group of boys in navy and red uniforms; Pavarotti whistling a tune to him after he professed not knowing a song; a Christmas dinner with a noisy but loving family, and then there was Kurt. Kurt crying, blushing, singing along with Blaine's own voice, laughing at his silly gestures, kissing him softly on the cheek, beaming down at him while wearing the red beret that belonged to Blaine's mother…
I'm drowning, Blaine realized, but he knew it was too late. He thought he heard a distressed scream somewhere above the surface but it faded away along with Kurt's image as everything turned to black.