Nov. 3, 2011, 11:57 p.m.
Breakfast at Blaine's.: Need to be Strong.
T - Words: 1,585 - Last Updated: Nov 03, 2011 Story: Closed - Chapters: 8/? - Created: Aug 08, 2011 - Updated: Nov 03, 2011 1,321 0 3 0 0
Blaine's fervent tone tore Kurt from his sleepy fog. His eyes snapped open and they were slow to focus. He could see that a fuzzy Blaine was leaning over him, his face alarmed and his strong hands glued to Kurt's shoulders. Kurt blinked rapidly and noticed as perspiration glided onto his lashes, the salty water blurring his sight even more. He tried to move, confused about where he was, but Blaine held him down. As Kurt squirmed, he realized that his entire body was drenched in sweat. He felt repulsive and his head was spinning. All he wanted to do was get up and take a shower, not understanding why Blaine wouldn't release him.
"Let me go," he groaned, but Blaine held steady.
"I said, let me go!" Kurt grabbed at Blaine's hands and pulled them off. He quickly sat up and moved to the edge of the bed, and Blaine saw as his boyfriend's face turned a ghastly shade of green and reached out for him just as he fell forward.
"Hey, you alright?" he asked. Kurt remained silent as he leaned into Blaine's chest, hearing the rapid thuds of his anxious heart. Kurt felt his stomach contract and he immediately recoiled from Blaine's grasp.
"Ugh, God. No," Kurt choked as an all too familiar river of regurgitation poured from his mouth. Blaine stepped back and fumbled for the emergency call button. His trembling fingers found it and pressed down until the staff rushed in. He then faded into the background and watched the sickening scene play out before him.
Blaine felt as if he were in his living room again. Alone and helpless. His breath caught in his throat and it burned like fire. He turned and walked to the door, bracing himself against its wooden frame. The sound of Kurt's heaving resounded in his ears and he found himself clutching his own stomach. He stumbled out into the hall…only to see Burt, Carole, Finn and the rest of the Glee club headed his way.
"Man, what's up? You look like you're gonna hurl," Finn said. Blaine pushed him aside and slipped through the small crowd of people. He shuffled into the waiting room and sat down in the first empty chair he saw. He brought his weak knees to his chest and buried his face in them. A moment later, Blaine heard someone take a seat beside him, the air whooshing from the cushion.
"Hi, Blaine," Mercedes said, placing a gentle hand upon his back.
"Hello," he hummed as he lifted his eyes to look at her, her face bursting with kindness and concern.
"Kurt never stops talking about you, you know?"
"Oh, yeah?" Blaine asked, suddenly worried about all Kurt's blabbing.
"Yup. He really loves you," she replied.
"Well, I really love him, too."
"I know," she said, scooting closer to Blaine. "He's going to make it through this, you'll see."
It was hard to find comfort in her words as he replayed the doctor's speech in his mind; stage IV…cure not likely.
"Mercedes, he has stomach cancer. It's so advanced, that there's a slim chance he'll pull through," Blaine stated with a quiver.
"He's stronger than you think," she reassured, standing up to go rejoin the group of family and friends that still waited in front of Kurt's door.
Blaine stood as well, letting out a sigh. He shoved his numb hands into his pockets and sauntered alongside Mercedes.
The doctors had left the room and Burt and Carole were the only ones surrounding Kurt. Finn and the other Glee club members remained outside, wearing hesitant expressions. Blaine ghosted past them and over to the boy, whose white hospital gown was now splattered with splotches of red.
"Dad, would you go tell everyone that I'm fine, and I love them, but they'll have to come back later?" Kurt squeaked, staring at the floor.
"Sure, kiddo," Burt replied as he smoothed his son's hair.
Carole stood, gripping the foot of Kurt's bed,;
"Is there anything we can do for you?" she asked, voice thick with worry. Kurt merely shook his head, making sure not to meet anyone's eyes.
Blaine kneeled, so he could find Kurt's solemn face, and he brought his thumb up to swipe away a tear as it danced down Kurt's cheek.
"I'm so sorry, sweetheart," he said. "I didn't mean to walk out. The doctors just bombarded you and…and I didn't know…" Kurt waved a hand at Blaine's words and he stopped talking.
"I understand," Kurt replied, still refusing to look at anything, apart from the floor.
"I know you're angry…"
"Blaine, I said I understand, okay?"
"O-okay."
Blaine went to kiss Kurt's chapped lips, but the boy pulled away and turned to stare out of the open window. Light flooded into the room, highlighting Kurt's thinning features.
"Do you want me to help you get cleaned up?" Blaine asked, ignoring the tiny noise that escaped Carole's throat. Although she was very accepting of Kurt and Blaine's relationship, some things still managed to catch her off guard.
"No, I've got it."
"Let me help you, Kurt," Blaine huffed "You can't get your left arm wet anyway, because of the IV."
"I'm perfectly capable of showering myself, thank you," he retorted. Before Blaine could utter another syllable, Kurt got up and walked to the bathroom as speedily as possible, slamming the door in his company's face.
Carole finally released the grip she had on the footboard of the bed and turned to face Blaine, who had slumped down onto the floor, his back against the door Kurt had just entered.
"He'll come around, sweetie," Carole comforted him.
"Has-has the doctor told him everything? About his cancer?" Blaine questioned as he tousled his dark locks.
"Yes."
"Well, that certainly explains the sudden change in mood."
Blaine then heard the water from the shower sputter on; Kurt must have been listening to his conversation with Carole. He bit his lip and leaned his head back with a thud.
__________________________________________________________
Kurt's skin prickled, welcoming the cold fall of the liquid. What am I going to do? I-I just turned 18. I haven't lived yet, he thought as he ran his free hand through his matted hair and licked at the drops that grazed the crease of his lips.
This couldn't be happening. Not now. Not with everything finally going right. Blaine was attending McKinley, Karofsky had come out and was no longer haunting Kurt's memories, and Kurt was in love with the most marvelous man.
He didn't know how long he'd been standing under the steady stream, but an abrupt knock at the door ripped Kurt from the numbness that had overwhelmed him,
"You okay? Kurt, it's been 30 minutes!" Blaine shouted.
"Yes, I'm fine," he replied, rolling his eyes. He heard the door handle jiggle under the weight of Blaine's eager hand and reached to turn off the now sweltering water.
"I'm fine, Blaine!"
Kurt wrapped a towel around his waist and swiftly flicked the lock, waiting for what was sure to come in a matter of seconds.
The door swung open and he greeted Blaine with a look of disdain.
"Yes?" Kurt snapped, and Blaine visibly shrunk away from the fire in his voice.
"Baby, I'm so s-"
Kurt cut him off.
"Don't. Don't fucking say it," Kurt spat. "And don't look at me like that…like I'm-"
"Dying?" Blaine finished, his eyes glistening.
"S-shit."
"I know," Blaine soothed as he drew Kurt into his chest. "But you can get the treatments and you can put up one hell of a fight. You're so strong, love . You can beat this."
Kurt slithered out of Blaine's embrace and ferociously wiped at the tears that stained his face.
"I don't want the treatments," he muttered, turning his back to Blaine in order to avoid his brokenhearted glare.
"W-what?" Blaine's head was reeling and an intense wave of nauseous hit him at an unrelenting rate.
"You heard me," Kurt said, swallowing hard.
"You're kidding, right? I mean, you can't be serious?," Blaine replied as he walked up behind Kurt and grabbed his collarbone, twisting him around.
"Ow!" the boy shrieked.
"What about us, Kurt? What about your family? And your friends?"
"For Christ's sake! What about me? Did you ever stop and think about that? I don't want to become some fucking vegetable that you and everyone else must look after!"
Blaine inched closer to Kurt, and Kurt could feel Blaine's humid breath sprinkle across his face as he spoke;
"You are not going to become a vegetable."
"Maybe not, but I will always be tired and feel like shit. I don't want to spend what little time I have left like that!" Kurt argued. "I want to be able to enjoy my Senior pro-"
Blaine caught Kurt's wrist as he tried to reach for his briefs;
"Prom?" he breathed.
Kurt gulped and gave a sheepish nod, beads of water dripping from the wet mop atop his head.
"This…is about prom?" Blaine boomed, the veins in his neck pulsating.
"Honey, my wrist…you're-you're hurting me!" Kurt pried at Blaine's fingers, but they just kept digging into his porcelain skin.
Blaine forced his boyfriend up against the condensation-covered wall;
"You are giving up your whole damn life for a fucking high-school dance?" he scorned.
"Th-that's not the only reason!" Kurt said, suppressing a sob.
"Bullshit!"
"God dammit, Blaine! I want to make love to you! Do you hear me? I want to make love to you," Kurt confessed, his body feeling like it was going to spontaneously combust. "And I need to be strong enough to do that."
Blaine's features softened and he gradually loosened the hold he had on Kurt.
"If you don't start the treatments immediately, we may not even get the chance," Blaine whispered from under his long lashes. "I'm begging you, Kurt."
But before Kurt could answer, they heard the door to his room creak open…
Comments
Fucking MORE! :)
Haha, sure thing!
it kind of feels like kurt is resigned to his fate. he wants to make love with blaine and go to his prom before...it's kind of like his 'make a wish' last wishes. it seems like he's starting to pull away from everyone he loves to maybe make the pain less painful. this is so sad...