“Papa doesn’t have fairy wings, and neither do you,” Colin said, annoyed.

“Yes we do,” Tess insisted.

“You at least wear your dress-up fairy wings all the time, so that makes a little bit of sense, but Papa never does,” Colin said.

It was a familiar argument. Three-year-old Tess had a whimsical nature, and sometimes seemed to live more in the world of her imagination than in reality. Six-year-old Colin was a serious, logical child. His criticism of Tess’s colorful drawing of their family this morning was one he’d made many times before. Fortunately, it didn’t seem to faze Tess in the least. Asher stayed out of the argument, quietly coloring a picture of a firetruck.

“If you don’t like fairy wings, you don’t have to have any,” Tess said. “See? I didn’t draw any on you or Asher or Daddy. Or on my little sister and little brother.”

Blaine walked in just in time to hear Colin’s response. “You don’t have a little sister or a little brother,” Colin said, exasperated. “Papa and Daddy said we are enough kids already. They said no more diapers, ever, and they were really happy when they said that.”

“It’s okay for Tess to pretend that she has a little brother and sister if she wants to,” Blaine said, doing his best to calm the dispute. “Tess, do you want to get some of your dolls and play? Breakfast is ready for you guys, you could bring them to the table.”

“I don’t need to pretend, Daddy,” Tess said. “My little sister is coming today.”

“That’s great, sweetie,” Blaine said, brushing her off. “Now come on, everyone, before the waffles get cold.”

Breakfast was just for the kids and Taylor. Blaine had gotten a surprise phone call from Puck the night before, saying he was in New York and wanted to meet Blaine and Kurt for brunch to discuss a “business proposition.” He refused to give any details over the phone, and Kurt commented to Blaine that it sounded extremely dubious. Once the kids were settled down for breakfast, Kurt and Blaine headed out to their favorite local bagel store and café to meet him.

Puck was already sitting in a booth when they got there, dressed in a tacky suit with dark sunglasses pushed up on his head. He stood up and hugged them warmly. “Kurt! Blaine! My bros! Long time no see!”

They made small talk and placed their orders, Puck flirting with the middle-aged waitress. Finally, when the food was set down in front of them, Kurt decided it was time to get down to it. “So what’s this mysterious ‘business proposition’?” he asked.

Puck looked down at his bagel for a minute, hesitating, and then looked up again. “Well, it’s not exactly business-related. It’s … well, let me start at the beginning of the story. I’ve been expanding my food truck empire out in LA, and I was in negotiations to buy this one business specializing in pie. You should taste their cherry pie, best I’ve ever had in my life, and the lemon meringue is also out of this world.”

“You want us to buy into your food truck business?” Kurt asked.

“No, no, I’m getting to the real point here,” Puck said. “So, the pie truck was owned by this super hot cougar named Mary Catherine, and, well, one thing led to another, and you know how it is, no woman can resist the charms of the Pucker-Man.”

Blaine sighed. “You’re thirty-three, Puck. When are you going to grow up and settle down?”

A wistful look crossed Puck’s face. “Yeah … I’d like to, eventually. Sometime soon.” He took a sip of his orange juice. “Anyway, she got knocked up. I didn’t even know a woman that old could get pregnant. I guess she didn’t, either, because she was all on about how great it was that she didn’t have to use birth control anymore, since it’s a sin for Catholics and all.”

Kurt buried his face in his hands. “She’s worried about condoms being a sin, but she doesn’t mind having sex outside marriage?”

“Well, her husband won’t touch her and divorce isn’t allowed, so she had to do something.”

“She’s married? Puck!”

“What? It’s not like I haven’t done it before.”

Kurt sighed. “You’re horrible, Puck. But I don’t see why you’re telling us all this. She’s married, she’s having a kid, nobody is the wiser and you’re off the hook.”

Puck looked around, fearful, though it was ridiculous to think that anyone in the Brooklyn café would know who he was. “Weren’t you listening, man? Her husband never touches her. She can’t claim it’s his. He can’t know about it at all. She’s kind of scared of him. He’s a scary guy. Big.”

“I still don’t understand what you want from us,” Blaine said.

“Don’t you see? I want you guys to adopt the baby! I told Mary Catherine not to worry, my gay bros would take care of everything.” Puck grinned as if this were an easy, perfect solution.

Kurt and Blaine both gaped at him. “Are you out of your goddamn mind?” Kurt finally said, almost shouting. “We have three kids already, which is plenty. They are old enough that we can finally go out and do fun things as a family without dragging around a gigantic and unfashionable and disgusting diaper bag. And I don’t see how this solves anything. Her husband will figure out she’s pregnant, unless he’s blind. And if she doesn’t want the baby, why doesn’t she have an abortion?”

“Abortion is like the biggest sin ever.” Puck said. “And we’ve figured out how to hide it from her husband. She’s going to spend six months at a writers’ retreat, working on a novel she’s always talked about writing. She’ll be gone for the whole rest of the pregnancy, and when she gets back, he’ll never know the difference. She’s had two kids already, so it won’t do much to her body, not that he ever looks. And they’re in college now, so it’s no problem with her going away.”

“Anyone could adopt this baby. Why are you so keen on giving it to us?” Blaine asked.

“I don’t want my kid out there being raised by strangers,” Puck said. “I need to make sure she has good parents. People I trust. People I can go visit. Like you guys. And Mary Catherine said that was fine with her, as long as she never has to see the baby.”

“So let me get this straight,” Kurt said. “Birth control and abortion are horrible sins, but adultery and giving your kid to be adopted by gay parents are totally fine.”

Puck nodded. “Yup. I don’t understand it either, but I’m a Jew, so it’s not supposed to make sense to me. I guess she goes to confession and gets all cool with God again afterward, or something.”

Blaine and Kurt looked at each other. Neither of them was enthusiastic about this idea, it was apparent.

“Maybe we should think about this for a while,” Blaine said tentatively.

“No,” Kurt said. “We’ve talked about it before. Our family is complete. Three kids is enough for anyone, four is just crazy.” He turned to Puck. “What do you think we are running here, The Hummel Home For Unwanted Children of Our Friends?”

Puck looked straight back at him. “It kind of looks like that’s exactly what you’re running, so … yes?”

“No, Puck,” Kurt said. “The answer is no.”

Blaine hated to disappoint anyone, he always had. “Maybe we should at least think about …”

“No,” Kurt said definitively.

Puck looked at them glumly. “What am I going to do now? I told Mary Catherine I would take care of this.”

“Why don’t you raise the baby yourself?” Blaine suggested. “I think you’d be a good father. You put on this tough exterior, but you’re secretly a very caring person.”

Puck’s shoulders slumped down. “I thought about that,” he admitted. “But … when we were talking before about whether I’d settle down? I want to, someday. I want to meet a nice Jewish girl and marry her and raise a family and make my mother happy. But that won’t happen if I’ve already got a kid around to get in the way. It could mess my whole life up. My whole future. You guys are already married, another kid doesn’t matter. But for a single guy … what nice Jewish girl would want to date me after that?”

“I’m sorry, Puck,” Kurt said. “Maybe we can help you think of something. But another baby … it’s just not in the cards for us.”

Puck looked heartbroken. He picked at his food in silence. “Can I at least come back to your place and say hello to the kids?” he finally asked. “I haven’t seen them since Tess and Asher were babies.”

Kurt smiled at him. “Of course.”