Trust

Chapter Three

Kurt wakes up with a start, breath hitching a little as he stares at the ceiling and hears Finn crashing around in the kitchen. 

He’d dreamed about the other night, he realized after a moment or two. 

And not just about the other night, because the fact is that in a couple of days…maybe…he didn’t know how much editing they did…he would be on the Internet for anybody to see, and that still freaks him out a bit but he can’t think about that or he’ll never be able to live a normal life. 

Nobody will equate Kurt Hummel who wears too many layers and tries to look as put-together as possible with the boy ejaculating on command online, even though he had given his name (although Blaine had promised him they’d just use first names) but hopefully people would think it was just a porn name. 

But no, he hadn’t been dreaming about any of that, as…oddly pleasurable as it had been. 

He had been dreaming about Blaine, his intense hazel eyes and that little smile he’d quirk whenever Kurt had tried to be snarky.  He’d been dreaming about what his dark hair looked like without the baseball cap, what his body looked like under the baggy coveralls, if he was as lithe and toned as he was in Kurt’s imagination. 

God, he can’t be smitten by a man who makes a living getting people off.  There’s so much wrong with that he doesn’t even know where to begin.  But Blaine…he’d been kind, and gentle, and had touched Kurt like he was something precious and he wasn’t just doing his job by it. 

Maybe he treated everybody like that, but Kurt can’t help feeling…special, almost.  And Blaine had been really, really easy on him considering some of the things he’d checked off as being okay…in retrospect it’s probably a good thing but he would have thought they would go for the most extreme ideas possible and really, being tied to a chair isn’t that out there in the long run. 

And Blaine hadn’t kissed him.  He’d been so close, so close to pressing their lips together and at one point Kurt had almost done it himself because Blaine’s the first person he’s wanted to kiss since Karofsky…

Well, suffice to say, his first kiss had been with a girl and his second kiss had been forcibly stolen from him, so he wasn’t about to let his third be for some porn job, which is why he had specified ‘no kissing’ on the contract. 

An odd request, maybe, but it’s important to him, no matter how much he wanted Blaine to ignore the rules and kiss him regardless. 

“Hey, dude, you up?  I made edible eggs,” Finn raps on his door and Kurt groans, sliding out of bed and into the kitchen before sitting at the table and realizing that, yes, the eggs were actually quite good and he tells Finn so as the other man gets a giant smile on his face.  “See, you’ve taught me a thing or two, man.”

“I’d hope, after a few years,” Kurt replies dryly before going back to eating, his mind still drifting until Finn clears his throat.  “What?”

“Okay, spill.  Who is he?”

“Who’s who?” Kurt’s cursing himself for being so transparent because if Finn…Finn…can see through him, he knows there’s a problem. 

“Dude, you haven’t looked at anybody like that since…well…since me,” Finn says honestly, staring straight into Kurt’s eyes, and Kurt sighs and looks away.  “And man, look, I know I’m a stud and all, but you’re in New York!  You’ve gotta move on,” he teases, flashing a smile that only Kurt ever seems to be privy too, and Kurt can’t be happier about the relationship they’ve cultivated since high school.  The fact that Finn’s comfortable teasing him speaks volumes and Kurt knows that if there’s anybody he can trust with his feelings, it’s Finn. 

“Okay.  Yes.  There…is a guy.”

“I knew it.  Who is he?  He your boyfriend?  Can I give him the ‘you hurt him or I’ll kill you’ talk?  Can I get Santana to give him the ‘you hurt him and I’ll kill you talk’, cuz she totally does it better than me...”

“’Finn, Finn, stop,” Kurt has to call him off before he starts making wedding plans and Finn blinks at him before nodding. 

“So talk, then.”

“It’s…we met at his work,” Kurt says carefully, because it’s true.  “I saw him once.  That’s all.  This isn’t a romance.”

“Does he have a name?”

“Blaine,” Kurt sighs, knowing a second later that Finn will make fun of that so he levels a glare at him until he backs down.  “And no, I don’t know anything else about him and no, I won’t see him again.”

“Why not?” Finn asks softly and Kurt shrugs.  “You like him, you know where he works…dude, you deserve somebody.  You’re a total catch, and I’m not just saying that because you’re my brother,” he adds as Kurt rolls his eyes. 

“Well thank you, but it…wouldn’t work.”

“It should,” Finn nearly cuts him off and Kurt’s surprised by the vehemence in his tone.  “It really should, man.”

“Why?” Kurt can’t deny he’s confused.  “Why do you…why is this so important to you?”

“Because any guy that can make you smile like that has got to be pretty damn special,” Finn replies, utterly honest, and Kurt feels his breath catch.  Yes, Blaine’s made an impression on him, but it’s nothing more than fascination on Kurt’s part, he doesn’t want to…

But he could…

“Anyway, dude, I know it takes you like six hours before you consider yourself good-looking enough for the world to see you, so you’d better get moving or we’ll be late for classes,” Finn starts to clear the table and Kurt chances a glance at the clock and squeaks, rushing for the washroom once he realizes Finn’s right. 

However, it doesn’t stop his thoughts from drifting. 

000

“So?  How was it?”

Kurt isn’t sure why they have a Q&A after the fact but he’s sitting on the chair, wrapped up in a blanket (Blaine had told him a lot of the performers stayed naked but Kurt saw no reason for that) as Blaine stands behind the camera again, talking to him. 

“Good,” Kurt’s not quite sure what they’re expecting of him so he sticks with a version of the truth.  “It was…you were right, it is sort of therapeutic.”

“Told you,” Blaine smiles, and now that he’s not in the camera’s line of view it’s warm and intimate, making Kurt stomach squirm pleasurably.  “What was your favorite part?”

“Um,” quite honestly, Kurt’s not sure how to answer that because he’s still processing most of it and Blaine seems to get that after a moment, shaking his head and laughing quietly. 

“Don’t worry, that’s a common response.  I have to say, though, you’re very skilled at not coming until you’re told.  You sure you’ve never done this before?”

Kurt appreciates the teasing tone but all it truly does is remind him that the first man that’s touched him intimately works for a porn website and that sours the mood a little bit, but he forces a smile onto his face, “I’ve told you I haven’t.  I just have…very good self-control,” he settles on and Blaine nods. 

“Mm, could be interesting to explore,” he sounds like he’s almost talking to himself before his eyes snap up to Kurt’s again.  “How did you feel?  Scared?  Excited?”

“Little bit of both,” Kurt shrugs.  “Not really scared, because I knew that…I could control it if it got too much, but I’ve never done anything like this before so that was kind of exciting,” he admits, and it had been. 

“You never felt threatened?  Pressured?”

“No,” Kurt says immediately.  “I felt safe.  With you,” he realizes a second later what that sounds like and Blaine ducks his head, almost in embarrassment but Kurt’s sure he must hear that a lot.  “I mean…”

“No, that’s…that’s good to hear,” Blaine smiles.  “Think you’d be willing to go farther next time?  If there is a next time?” he amends and Kurt feels his heart start to beat faster because the idea is more appealing than it should be.  No, he’s not really the type to get off on being submissive to somebody else, but giving up all the stress in his life and just trusting somebody to take care of him is rather nice. 

Plus, he’s getting damn amazing orgasms out of it and that’s not something he can get just anywhere, but he’s not going to seem too eager. 

“There might be a next time, and I might be willing,” he says, rather coyly, and he’s not consciously trying to flirt but the blanket slips a little off of his shoulder and he sees Blaine’s eyes widen and the other man swallows visibly.  “But can I request that you be my…”

He doesn’t know what to call Blaine.  ‘Master’ implies he’s some sort of a slave and that’s not the case at all, ‘handler’ sounds like he’s some kind of animal…

“Yes,” Blaine chokes out after a few seconds of awkward silence.  “I mean…I’d like that.  I’m relatively new here and I’ve never…some of the guys that work here have women or men they always work with, and while I’ve had a few that I’ve done their introductory session, I’ve never really had a regular that I could try new things with, so that would be…you only have to request me.”

“I will.  I don’t think anybody could make me feel as at ease as you do,” Kurt says truthfully, hoping that none of this actually made the cut but he’s guessing it won’t because it’s getting a tad too personal.

“Excellent.  Well.  Thank you for coming in, Kurt,” he says and Kurt gets the feeling he’s trying to wrap things up so he nods and pulls the blanket closer again. 

“Of course.”

Blaine stops the camera and takes a few steps forward, checking his watch after a moment or two. 

“Sorry I can’t stay and talk about this more, but I’ve got another job in…fifteen minutes I have to get ready for,” he truly sounds apologetic and Kurt wants to talk more but he knows how…weird this all is. 

“I understand.  But thank you.  I was…really nervous coming here because I was afraid I’d be with somebody twice my age,” he laughs and Blaine snorts. 

“Yeah, well, we’ve got a few of them but I’m only 23, so I hope that’s not too old for you,” he rests a hand on Kurt’s shoulder and Kurt shivers, shifting the blanket so it falls again and Blaine’s touching his skin.  “Sorry, I…”

“No,” Kurt shakes his head, willing Blaine to understand, and Blaine strokes his skin softly for a couple of moments. 

“Well, I really do have to go.  You’re free to get changed in the washroom and leave whenever you’re ready.  Although why you’d want to stay here a second longer than you have to is beyond me,” he smiles thinly, patting Kurt’s shoulder one last time before leaving the room, and Kurt stares after him before realizing that he really, really wants to get back into his clothes.  Finn’s clothes. 

Clothes in general. 

000

“Actually, I think I will,” he says it and realizes a second after the words leave his mouth that there’s absolutely nothing preceding them for Finn to understand what he’s referring to. 

“You think you’ll what?” Finn glances over as they drive down the street and Kurt shrugs. 

“Blaine.  I think I’ll try to…to meet him again.”

“Dude, awesome!” Finn lifts up his hand for a high-five as Kurt shrieks at him to watch the road and after a few moments they’re back on-track. 

“Remind me why I let you drive again?”

“Stop changing the subject.  But it’s cool if you wanna meet him again.  You really like him, huh?”

“I barely know him, but…yes.  I think I could,” Kurt admits, trying to figure out when would be too soon to go back.  He doesn’t want to look desperate but he really doesn’t want to wait too long either, so he thinks that maybe he’ll take until the next weekend and then decide. 

“I’m really happy for you, dude,” Finn settles for a smile this time, keeping his hands firmly on the wheel, and Kurt’s grateful for that.