Trust

Chapter One

“You were out late last night,” Rachel comments casually as they sit on the sofa the next afternoon, watching some interior decorating show as Kurt looks around their drab apartment and sniffs.  “Hot date?”

“Please.  You know me better than that,” Kurt looks down at his chow mein, trying desperately to keep his cheeks from flushing because no, take-out from the little Chinese place across the street does not elicit that type of reaction.  “Just…out with some classmates.  Got a deadline coming up,” he replies, smiling as she squeals. 

“You have to show me the new designs!  I know I’ve been busy lately with our performance coming up but I haven’t played Maria in a couple of years and I need to connect with the character again,” she starts blabbering on about her play as Kurt nods, thinking of his sketches that he really does need to complete sitting away in his closet. 

The reason he needs the money in the first place is because after two years at NYADA being told he’s extremely talented but the business will never ever give him the roles he deserves, he decided to drop out and enrol in fashion school instead.  And he loves it, of course he does, but all Rachel talks about is NYADA and their old classmates and it gets a little lonely at times. 

Still, he’s found something else he’s good at and could potentially make a career in, and if he has to work at a…porn site…to do it, so be it. 

Not like any of his friends would go searching for gay porn anyway. 

“Regardless, I am so excited to do West Side Story again and oh!  Paul’s coming over later tonight so do you think you could…” she wiggles her fingers which is code for ‘go next door.’ 

Paul’s Rachel’s new boyfriend, a less ass-y clone of Jesse and Kurt approves of him for the most part although most of what he sees of him is running in and out of Rachel’s room.  They have a system, that if one of them (see: Rachel) has a boy over he’ll spend the night next door at Finn’s, and Kurt’s all too used to it by now that half his wardrobe lives with his stepbrother anyway. 

Rachel and Finn, he thinks with a sigh.  Finn came to New York with them, getting into an education program because his dreams of following in Mr. Schue’s footsteps had finally materialized and, Kurt had to admit, he was brilliant with kids (probably because he still had the IQ of one) and studious, although Kurt had to help him a lot there.  They’d all shared a place to begin with but of course the peace couldn’t last and one day he caught Rachel throwing her engagement ring out the window, nearly killing a poor old lady wandering below on the sidewalk. 

Finn had slept on the couch for a few nights until they’d learned the apartment next door was open for rent and then he’d moved over there, further straining them financially but he knew if Rachel and Finn stayed in the same place for any longer they’d literally kill each other. 

So Kurt goes over to Finn’s when Rachel has a boy around (he loves the girl but he has no desire to hear her in the middle of sex) and it works out for them, somehow.

“Sure, honey,” he promises, settling back against the cushions and continuing to eat while she opens her own meal (something with giant chunks of sponge-y tofu, no doubt) and continues to talk, her voice soothing as Kurt’s mind drifts back to the night before. 

000

His heart’s beating wildly in his chest, cuffs around his arms and legs and standing upright, hands above his head and long chains connecting his wrists to the ceiling, legs spread and toes barely touching the floor as he’s kept off-balance,  leaning forward a bit as the man…Blaine…strides forward and set a hand on the collar of his t-shirt, ripping it down the front as Kurt gasps and pulling out a knife to cut the rest away from his arms, the blade skimming along his skin as he shivers and whines a little. 

He’s turned on already, how he doesn’t know, but just having somebody touch him for the first time is thrilling and more than a little frightening, and even though Blaine’s utterly emotionless and Kurt has honestly no idea if he’s attractive or not…his face is nice, but with his hair jammed under a baseball cap and his body covered in something that looks like the type of clothing his father would wear at the garage, it’s not flattering to him at all…Kurt feels safe.

Blaine skims his hands over his chest; rough, callused fingers (feels like guitar calluses to Kurt, but that’s an odd thing to think) catching on his nipples as he gasps and bucks forward. 

“You’re excited, huh?” Blaine whispers in his ear and Kurt can only nod, straining against the bonds.  “That’s good.”

Blaine tugs the zipper on his jeans down, yanking them to his ankles and cutting through the thick denim to leave them pooled on the floor and oh, Kurt realizes now why they’d told him to wear clothes he didn’t mind sacrificing (Finn will never know, and he won’t know about the extra change of clothes Kurt had to bring along, either), leaving him only in a skimpy pair of underwear. 

“You’re really pretty,” Blaine laughs, tossing the knife aside and cupping Kurt through his briefs, earning another gasp.  “Make noise for me.  I want to hear everything.”

“Yes, sir,” Kurt manages to get out, although being touched there for the first time it’s hard to focus on anything else and Blaine’s massaging gently, getting him hard through the fabric before he’s ripping those off as well, and Kurt tries not to think about the fact that he’s naked in front of a camera, cock erect and leaking as Blaine smears his thumb over the tip and collects a bead of pre-cum, holding it up to Kurt’s mouth to taste. 

“Good boy.  Sit tight,” he pats Kurt on the ass on his way by, heading to a table across the way, and Kurt gulps as he wonders what’s to come. 

000

“So where were you last night?”

“What are you and Rachel, my caregivers?” Kurt snorts as Finn yells something at the television and no, the other man may not be biologically related to Kurt’s father, but they both share a rather infuriating trait of giving the players on-screen advice they’ll never hear.

“Nah, Rach was worried, so…”

“You’re speaking again, are you?” Kurt asks dryly as Finn shrugs, turning back to the TV after a moment.  “Not really, man, she just came over ‘cuz she was worried.  So?”

“None of your business,” Kurt decides on, because no way is he telling Finn. 

It would get back to his father within the hour because Finn, bless his heart, can’t keep a secret to save his life. 

Especially when he knows it’s a secret he should keep. 

“Dude, I’m your big brother!”

“I’m older!” Kurt slips easily back into the old argument, mock-glaring at Finn, and the other man really can’t say anything to that so he goes back to yelling at the TV while Kurt sinks back against the couch, wondering why he doesn’t feel more shame about everything. 

He thinks that maybe the fact that he was naked and brought to orgasm…twice…in front of anybody who wanted to see hasn’t quite sunk in yet, because he’s not an exhibitionist…far from it, up until a few years ago he’d thought sex was weird and porn was something that no sane person did, but between switching programs and Finn moving next door money’s tighter than ever and when he saw the ad, saw that he could choose what he had done to him (it would affect the pay, but still, he can work his way up) and saw that it was all completely with his consent he’d been desperate. 

And it had been…like Blaine said, almost soothing, finding that release without having the hassle of a relationship to add to his already hectic schedule, and while part of him wonders how he can sit beside his stepbrother and act like he hasn’t been exposed in front of the whole world, a bigger one is almost…content. 

Finn’s not paying attention to him at all so he closes his eyes and slips back into the memories of the night before, trying to sort it all out in his head. 

000

The flogger whips across the back of his thighs, little pinpricks of pain that have him squeezing his eyes shut as he hears Blaine chuckle. 

“You’re so pale,” the other man says, sounding awed, and Kurt’s willing to be that his skin is red and marked already even though he’d been assured that nothing they did would leave a lasting mark.  He’s still hard, somehow, even with the pain and the camera and the shadowy figures moving around in the background that continually remind him that no, it’s not just Blaine, but he’s not thinking about them. 

He feels the strike of the flogger against his skin again and gasps, straining forward without realizing it even though there’s no way he’s moving anywhere, and when Blaine’s hand comes down sharply on the same spot he can’t help the moan that rips from his throat, not when he’s right on the edge between pleasure and pain like this. 

The strikes come with more rapid succession after that, blending into one another and even the trail of the cool latex falls dragging across his burning skin after the fact doesn’t soothe it any. 

He realizes he’s sobbing about a second after the last strike falls, mumbling a broken litany of please, please and Blaine moves in front of him, roughly gripping his chin and raising his head to meet the other man’s eyes. 

“Please, what?  You must like that, you’re still hard,” he smirks and Kurt nods because he realizes it’s true, he is, and he doesn’t know if he wants to stop or if he wants Blaine to make him orgasm but, he realizes belatedly, that’s the beauty of this all, isn’t it?

He doesn’t have to make that choice.  He doesn’t have a choice. 

“You want to come?” Blaine injects a certain amount of caring into his voice and Kurt nods rapidly as the other man finally, finally touches him there.  “You have to ask me before you can come.”

Kurt closes his eyes and shivers, the slow drag of Blaine’s rough fingers up his cock making it hard to even think, but he forces down his initial disgust at having to beg and swallows heavily, whispering another shaky, “Please.”

“Hmm, if that’s the best you can do I think I’m going to leave you here for a while,” Blaine’s eyes are boring into his, intense hazel flecked with green and gold and they’re beautiful, something in them much softer than Blaine’s overall demeanour, telling Kurt that he’s not going to hurt him, he just wants to make him feel good. 

And that’s enough.

“Please,” he says, louder, feeling his body start to shake even though the restraints won’t let him fall. “Please, sir, I need to come.  Please,” he’s nearly sobbing again at the slow burn, the way Blaine’s not moving faster than he has to, but it seems to be enough as he speeds up his pace, thumb pressing slightly into the leaking slit. 

“Okay.  Come.”

Kurt gasps and does, hot liquid spurting over Blaine’s hand and onto his own stomach as he trusts the restraints to hold him up and slumps down completely, shaking, because that was one of the greatest orgasms of his life. 

He barely registers being released, tucked safely in Blaine’s arms as he’s wiped clean and settled on a pillow that won’t hurt his stinging backside, and when he’s offered a blanket and a glass of water he takes them both, somehow feeling more vulnerable now than he had when he was hanging there for all to see. 

“You did good,” Blaine promises as the crew moves to set up the next shot.  “Still up for round two?”

“Just…give me a minute,” Kurt gulps.  “I…” he pauses, not sure what to call Blaine now that they’re not in character.

“It’s just Blaine now,” the other man kneels down beside him and runs a hand along his shoulder.  “Kurt, tell me the truth, was that…”

“I wasn’t lying when I said I’d never done anything,” Kurt whispers, seeing a momentary flicker of shock in Blaine’s eyes before it’s hastily covered up. 

“Well.  We like our virgins,” he smiles before standing.  “Take ten minutes.  Do whatever you need to do, bathrooms are over there,” he jerks a head to the corner behind the cameras.  “And if you need anything…something else to drink, some food, anything, don’t be afraid to ask for it.  You’re an employee, not a slave,” he reminds him before walking away and Kurt cups the water glass in his hands, staring down at it in wonder. 

Well.  He hadn’t hated that.  It had been…nice, actually, to forget about all the stress in his life and just leave it in somebody else’s hands for once. 

And Blaine’s…not what he’d expected, but he’s thinking that it’s a good thing. 

000

“Dude, you’re spacing.  The game ended like ten minutes ago,” Finn waves a hand in front of his face and Kurt snaps back to reality with a shake of his head, a little embarrassed he’d been caught day-dreaming. 

“Sorry.  Just…tired,” he lies and Finn seems to accept that. 

“Yeah, you had a late night.  Look, I’m gonna crash, so you can go to bed whenever you want, okay?  Don’t work yourself too hard,” he pats Kurt’s shoulder before drawing him into a hug.  “Love you, bro,” he murmurs into Kurt’s hair as Kurt lets himself rest in the embrace for a bit. 

It’s taken Finn a while, to get to the ‘I love you’ stage without freezing up first, but they’re there and while maybe it’s not the relationship Kurt had first wanted with Finn, they’re family and he’s got him forever and that’s all he could ever ask for. 

“Love you, too,” he mumbles, lying back on the couch and changing the channels once Finn’s left the room. 

His thoughts, however, keep straying back to Blaine. 

And he’s not sure what that means.