Feb. 26, 2013, 3:06 a.m.
Till There Was You: Admission
E - Words: 3,887 - Last Updated: Feb 26, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 18/? - Created: Aug 05, 2012 - Updated: Feb 26, 2013 1,077 0 4 0 0
The next day in school Blaine was waiting for Kurt to get off class, so he found himself in the deserted auditorium. He had decided to rehearse a solo he really wanted in glee club and since he didn't have much else to do he might as well take advantage of the time until he and Kurt could go home.
"Hey. That was amazing. You always are," a voice sound and Blaine nearly tripped over the microphone stand. He hadn't noticed Tina entering the stage to sit by the piano and watch him go over the song.
"Hey Tina. Thanks," he stammered awkwardly and walked over to her with insecure steps.
"Uhm... there's something I've been meaning to ask you about, but I couldn't really figure out how to do it," she said and chewed on her lower lip as he sat down next to her and grabbed the bottle of water he had put on the floor.
"Okay. I guess – fire away," he accepted and gulped down a mouthful of water to chase away the rasp feeling in his throat from going over the same notes over and over again, desperate for perfection in every performance he ever did.
"Do you have a boyfriend?" She asked apprehensively.
The words hit Blaine like he had run into a brick wall. He nearly choked on his water and felt his cheeks flame up. He didn't dare look at her, afraid that she would know everything just from looking at his face.
"No – how would I ever get a boyfriend?" Blaine cringed, already knowing that he wouldn't be able to convince a snowman that going to Africa was a bad idea.
"Because you're smart and funny and talented and gorgeous – but that's not the point. I... is it Kurt?" She asked, nearly whispering the last part, clearly waiting for it to break or burn.
Blaine's heart froze. For a moment he feared that his lunch was on its way back up. He knew that he had to be pale and his eyes were stinging.
"It's not to pry or anything. I know it's none of my business. It's just... I've noticed you together and the way you look at each other is just – it seems like so much love," she stumbled out.
What was he supposed to do now? What would Kurt do? He would need to convince Tina that she was wrong. He couldn't just tell her that she was right. It was against the golden rule of their relationship.
"Please don't tell anyone. Everyone would go crazy if they knew," Blaine babbled out as he turned to meet her eyes, his face tense and begging.
"Of course I would never tell anyone. I know there's a reason you kept it to yourself. I just needed to ask, because... I really care about you, Blaine, and I want you happy. If you're happy with Kurt I am happy for both of you. You used to be so sad, but lately you've blossomed. But I am sure that everyone else are so full of themselves that they haven't noticed," she explained.
His brain was about to explode. The secret was out. He trusted Tina, knew that she would never betray them, but it still felt wrong that he had told her without discussing it with Kurt. Yet, it was a relief. It felt like the world had been lifted off his chest.
"Thank you. You don't think it's weird?" Blaine asked.
She looked like she was considering it for a moment, and then she smiled broadly before she responded.
"No. Not really. I mean; you're not really brothers, and it's not like you grew up under the same roof. You've been very close for the past two years. I honestly think it would've been a shame if you had let your parents' marriage hold you back if you really like each other," she declared like she had been thinking it over a lot.
"I really, really love him, Tina -" Blaine smiled with a relieved sigh.
"Hey. Are you ready to go home?"
At that moment Kurt came down the stairs and walked over in front of the stage where they were sitting. Blaine lit up and sent Tina a wide grin before he crossed the stage to jump down and pull Kurt close for a kiss.
He went stiff in Blaine's arms, all alarms blinking red and panic fueled by his inner scream. What was he even thinking? They were in the middle of the auditorium, in front of Tina – and everyone could come in any second. Had Blaine gone completely crazy?
"It's okay. Tina sort of guessed about us and I couldn't just lie to her. She promised she won't tell anyone," Blaine said calmly and hoped it would ease Kurt's nerves.
On the contrary Kurt looked even more nervous than he had before. He could feel everything turn inside him and his brain was screaming that he needed to do damage control but no options were offered to save what had been done.
"Oh Tina. Please, please, please promise me that you won't even tell Mike. This can't get out to anyone at all. If it does it can hurt my dad's political career, and Blaine's mom's career. I will never get into NYADA if it comes out and Blaine will have to be here all alone with this and -" Kurt blabbered out, unable to stop the waterfall of words running out of him.
"Kurt. Kurt – it's okay. I won't tell anyone. I promise you I won't!" Tina said and jumped down next to them.
"Kurt, listen – I see how much you guys mean to each other. If it was me with Mike and we had to hide it for some reason... I would trust that you guys wouldn't tell anyone if you found out. I just want you to be happy. And if you're happy together, then I am happy for you," she smiled.
Blaine looked at him with those big, puppy eyes that Kurt had never been able to resist. This was all sorts of wrong, but Blaine seemed so happy to finally have been able to share it with someone. He trusted Tina, but he couldn't help feeling that the more people knew the bigger the chance would be that someone slipped their tongue and it would ruin everything.
"Kurt, it will be fine. I'm sure it will," Blaine tried to assure him, squeezing his arm lightly.
"Blaine, I – okay... it's not like there's anything we can do about it now, but – thank you, Tina. I guess it will be easier to hang out with people in the future. Or... you," Kurt chuckled and let his hand up to grab Blaine's and squeeze it to his chest.
"Yeah. I can imagine it must be hard to stay hidden like that. I don't think I could do it. Just – let me know if you want to hang out some time. You can be as cute and couple-y together as you want," she said and grinned at them.
They stayed and talked for a bit. Blaine bathed in the feeling of being able to hold Kurt close in front of someone, while Kurt tried easing himself into the realization that he didn't need to keep his guards up all the time.
After a while they said goodbye to Tina and headed for the car. They drove home with their hands locked and smiles between them, but they didn't talk. Kurt figured they could talk about it once they came home, but when they arrived Susan was in the kitchen and asked Kurt to come help her, ending up in them spending all afternoon with their parents so they didn't have time before family dinner.
To Blaine's surprise Kurt found his hand under the table while they were eating, and luckily their parents didn't notice anything. At dessert the phone rang and Kurt's dad had to answer it. After a moment on the phone in the kitchen he called Susan to come talk to him and it only took Kurt a fraction of a second to press his lips against Blaine's.
"Kurt – our parents are out there," Blaine smiled surprised, his belly bubbling from the kiss and the sight of Kurt's giddy face.
"Ugh, I'm so tired of sneaking around. I haven't really kissed you all day, so well... we're not sleeping tonight. You're coming to my bed, and we'll be making out all night," Kurt whispered, but rushed back as he heard their parents come back.
They sat down and Susan looked like she was feeling guilty.
"Guys, we're really sorry but we have to go out of town for the weekend. Will you be okay?" Burt said, and Blaine didn't know if he should cry or cheer.
He had plans with his mom in the morning and it was ages since they had done something together. He missed her a lot. But on the other hand it meant alone-time with Kurt – and they did have a deal for next time their parents would be out of town.
"Sure. It's fine. When will you be leaving?" Blaine mumbled.
"We have to go early in the morning and then we won't be back until late Sunday, honey. Is it okay? I promise you I'll make it up to you next weekend, baby -" his mom said, obviously feeling guilty.
"Mom, it's fine. We'll just find another day. I'll be fine -"
"Yeah, it's alright, Susan. Blaine and I will just do something together instead," Kurt assured her and squeezed Blaine's hand, but hurried to release it so he didn't let it linger for too long.
Xxx
They told their parents goodbye before they left in the morning and then they proceeded to do their separate things. Blaine went to the music store to look for the Christina Aguilera Christmas album because he had seen it on sale earlier that week where he didn't have any cash with him. Kurt had something to fix on his car so he went to the tire shop. They agreed to meet back home late afternoon to not let anything take up their alone time.
On his way home from the mall Blaine stopped by the tire shop and couldn't help feeling his pulse rise when he watched Kurt leaned over the car in a jumpsuit. He watched him a little from afar as he worked around with the different tools with greasy fingers and his hair a little ruffled. Blaine was impressed to see that he seemed so skilled in what he was doing.
Now they had finished dinner and were lying on Blaine's bed with the TV on. Some sort of quiz was running on the screen. Blaine had his head resting on Kurt's shoulder and their hands were locked between them.
"Are you made about Tina? That I told her?" Blaine asked insecurely. They hadn't had a calm moment alone to discuss it and he didn't want to pretend nothing had happened. If Kurt was upset about it they should talk about it and have it solved.
"No. No, Blaine. I was startled and I sort of panicked. OF course I know that we can trust her. I just wish we could have discussed it first," Kurt sighed and stroke a hand over Blaine's hand.
"I know. Me too. But I couldn't really call you or something. And I didn't want to lie to her," Blaine said and watched as he played with Kurt's fingers.
"It's okay. Don't worry about it. Now we can hang out with her sometimes. But now... I think we should go to bed," Kurt declared and kissed Blaine's hair before he jumped up and headed for the door.
"Bed? It's only 7.30 and we can sleep late tomorrow," Blaine said confused, furrowing his brows. He knew that Kurt wasn't one to stay up late but this was a new record for him. The earliest he had seen Kurt go to bed if wasn't sick was 10pm.
"I'm not planning on sleeping, silly. I thought we had a deal for the next time we had the house alone," Kurt said playfully, but in reality he was deadly nervous.
What if Blaine didn't want to do it anyway? What if Blaine didn't feel ready? It was a big step for him. He had never been undressed in front of anyone but his mom and his doctors before. He had confided in Kurt that he didn't know how to swim, because even though they had a pool at their old house his dad didn't want him to wear a bathing suit because it was 'too revealing' – but of course Blaine knew what his problem was.
By the sound of Kurt's words Blaine's insides took a roll. He hadn't forgot, he simply hadn't dared hoping that Kurt still wanted to go along with it. He had thought about it since they had discussed it, but neither had mentioned it since their parents had been home since.
"I mean – if you still are okay with it. If you aren't we can just... put on our pjs and watch the movie as usual," Kurt stammered when Blaine simply looked at him.
"No. I wanna do it. Let's do it..." Blaine rushed to say as he pulled himself out of his hypnotized state.
Kurt felt his throat tie up and sent Blaine a smile before turning on his heel to leave Blaine's room so he could go brush his teeth – he wanted to kiss Blaine as much as possible, but definitely not with dinner-breath. He scrubbed his teeth and tongue, fixed his hair and made sure he didn't smell from cooking earlier. Then he slipped on his lightest pajamas and took a deep breath before heading back.
When he returned Blaine was on the bed and the TV was turned off. He was sitting stiffly with his hands resting on his thighs and his legs stretched. He was waiting and he was nervous. What if Kurt changed his mind and found out that he couldn't be okay with it?
"Alright. This is good. I was thinking that... maybe we could get under the covers and then take off our clothes. You know, so you don't have to feel so... exposed," Kurt suggested. Really he knew he would feel exposed himself. It wasn't exactly like he enjoyed having his body put on display.
Blaine appreciated the offer a lot. He was really looking forward to doing this, but he was also scared that the second Kurt noticed the lack of bulge in his underwear he would freak out – or the moment Blaine noticed the presence of great bulge in Kurt's underwear he would lose control.
"Yeah. Yes. Just come here, then."
Blaine got up and pushed the bedspread to the floor so he could crawl under the comforter. As soon as Kurt had turned off the lights he was on his way under himself.
They stayed in the dark without saying a word for a moment before Kurt took a deep breath and slowly started unbuttoning his pajama shirt. Blaine awkwardly got his own shirt open and had it fall to the floor. From there on they undressed in silence until they were only wearing boxer briefs.
"So uhm... I'm done. How about you?" Blaine choked out, his hands tightly grabbing the sheets over his belly.
"Yeah. I'm there too. So eh... I guess this is it. Are you ready? I mean – can I..." Kurt trailed off and slowly shifted to lie on his side where he reached his hand across the mattress, stopping right before he touched Blaine's shoulder.
With a bit fumbling Blaine had his hands under the comforter and got himself shuffled to lie on his side as well. His eyes met Kurt's and with struggling throat he was suddenly pressing his mouth against Kurt's.
Kurt turned stiff from the shock but it only took him a second to press back. He wanted to touch, rest a hand on Blaine's shoulder or on his cheek like he always did when they were kissing, but doing it when they were only in their underwear seemed so odd and intruding.
He could feel the warmth radiating from Blaine's body, and he was suddenly very aware that his nipples were taut since he was so close to letting them brush against Blaine's exposed torso. He felt a craving rise with the heat in his blood and purposely retracted his hips to avoid his erection crashing against Blaine's crotch.
It was like everything was reduced to a blur in the darkness of the room and by the touch of Kurt's skin as Blaine experimentally tried to let his hand slide over his boyfriend's hip and onto his back. In his ears a ghost of rushing blood was throbbing and it was like he was possessed from one moment to the next – driven by Kurt's tongue hard, wet and erotically dancing around his mouth in a way that set a bonfire free between Blaine's legs.
With a determined push of his chest against Kurt's he had the older boy on his back so Blaine could fumble on top of him before Kurt had any chance of realizing what was happening. Blaine was on top of him with a hand resting on the mattress next to Kurt's head and his other hand cupping Kurt's face as he continued to move his lips against Kurt's with a needy pace.
Kurt's hands locked on Blaine's strong shoulders. In the same second Blaine pressed himself onto Kurt's clothed hard-on and whimpered loudly from the feeling. Kurt saw where he was headed, and as much as his balls were about to explode he needed to be mature and stop it before it went out of hand.
The feeling of finally having Kurt's dick so close to his own sex was both intoxicating and dissatisfying. He could feel his underwear wetting and the way Kurt so hard and full, probably aching to fill him up, was enough to swear that he was on the brink of coming. He pressed himself a little harder down, his chest heavy on Kurt's with his kiss growing wilder. It wasn't until Kurt dug his nails into Blaine's shoulders and forced him away that Blaine sensed something was wrong.
"What's wrong? Did I do something wrong?" Blaine asked through heavy panting.
"No, you didn't. You were so... that's not the point. The point is that this wasn't supposed to happen!" Kurt said and cursed away that his arousal was painting his voice in the colors of dark lust and need.
"Come on, Kurt. I want you so much. I'm ready. Don't you want me?" Blaine moaned and moved closer to him, his kiss-swollen lips sliding over Kurt's cheek in a state of delirium caused by the reality of their bodies being so close, only separated by so little.
"What? Of course I... of course I want you. I just – I don't think we're ready for that. You can't really decide now whether you're ready because of hormones and we're close and... no, Blaine – please, not like this," Kurt forced out, this time all lust gone. His voice was completely taken over by his need to explain his boyfriend that it wasn't because he didn't want him, even though one of his boyfriend's biggest fears was for Kurt to turn him down once they started to get intimate.
Blaine abruptly moved away, his eyes big and glistening in the dark of the room where only the comforter was keeping them safe from what nights hide. Blaine's face was cleared of all emotion and he was clearly having an inner debate with himself, scaring Kurt more than he could tell.
"Please, oh god, please don't think this is because I have a problem with your... you know -" Kurt started saying, but he just couldn't get the word over his lips. It was right there, rolling around on his tongue ready to get out, but it wouldn't – he couldn't say it.
"My pussy?" Blaine asked and Kurt felt like he had his face shoved into iced water.
"It's okay, Kurt. I didn't think so. And uhm... you can say it. I know what I am, Kurt."
Blaine wished that he had stopped talking before his voice cracked, but it was too late now and he couldn't stop the sad expression forming on Kurt's face.
"No. No, Blaine. No... it's not what you are – it's what you have. Don't let it define you. That's not what you are," Kurt said weakly and dared his fingertips to graze over Blaine's hand.
"I love you -" Blaine murmured.
"I'm sorry I... ruined it. I just – I really like this, and I really like feeling you and... I really like kissing you when we're like this," Blaine said and turned his hand around to slide his fingers between Kurt's.
"God. I just keep on screwing everything up, don't I? I just continually keep on making this more awkward than it has to be," Kurt groaned as he hid his face in his pillow.
Blaine moved closer and put a chaste kiss to Kurt's moist lips with a little smile. He moved so close that they could feel each other without touching and pushed lightly on Kurt's shoulder so he fell down to lie on his back instead of his side. As soon as Blaine figured it to be good enough he moved over to put his arm around Kurt's waist so he could rest his head on his shoulder.
Kurt's belly filled with butterflies and a grin spread over his face. It only took him fraction of a second to rush his arms around Blaine's shoulders so he could clench him tight and kiss his hair.
The feeling of skin on skin was overwhelming and Blaine figured that if they weren't going to do anymore this was definitely worth it. Somehow it felt like they were experiencing each other in a whole new way, and yet it felt like they had always done this. It was perfect and comforting.
"I don't care that we don't do it now. I like this," Blaine mumbled and let his hand traced over Kurt's soft fine hairs on his arm, so much more innocent and pure than the dark hair covering his own arms.
"Me too. We should have done this before. I like that I can – really feel you now," Kurt cooed and squeezed his boyfriend a little tighter.
"Yeah. I could feel that -" Blaine joked, but wished that he could have stopped it even before the words left his mouth.
"Oh god! Oh god that was so embarrassing. Please don't ever mention that again. I just couldn't help it. I'm sorry," Kurt blabbered out, completely flustered and glad Blaine couldn't see his face.
Until Blaine turned his head and stared at Kurt with big dark eyes.
"What? Kurt, that was so hot. I couldn't believe it was real. You felt so good. I was so... wet. For you," he admitted under his breath and dug his fingers into Kurt's side, flame heating just from the thought that he had actually rubbed himself almost directly on Kurt's cock.
"Really? I was so scared you were going to panic or hate me or..."
"Of course not. I've always known that you are beautiful and sexy but... wow that was amazing. One day -" Blaine said with a breathless chuckle and kissed Kurt deeply before lying back down on his shoulder as if nothing had happened.
"Yeah. One day," Kurt agreed with a whisper, running his fingers around the locks on the back of Blaine's neck.
Comments
Why oh why did Kurt stop it?!?! It was getting hot :(
I'm happy Tina found out about the relationship I always loved her character and found her the most trust worthy. I also love that Blaine is so damn horny for Kurt and vice versa. I'm kind of upset that Kurt stopped the magical activities but thats Kurt for ya...
As always, your stories just keep getting better and better. I love your portrayal of the boys, it makes me feel like I'm inside their heads...thank you.
OMG THIS WAS SO PERFECT!!! I love this story. Please update soon!