Oct. 13, 2012, 5:56 a.m.
Puzzle Pieces: Down Tour
E - Words: 1,943 - Last Updated: Oct 13, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 2/? - Created: Oct 06, 2012 - Updated: Oct 13, 2012 456 0 7 0 0
After his mom's declaration Blaine didn't know what to believe anymore. He kind of felt like she had told him he was a wizard. However, he couldn't stop thinking about it. As much as he tried pushing it away as a fairy tale he kept catching himself imagining how that person would be if they were real.
He would sit in school daydreaming or lie in bed fantasizing about a Disney prince kind of person who would sweep him off his feet. Someone with gorgeous, thick hair and perfect skin, a voice that would melt his heart and would sound perfect for duets with his own voice. A soul, a heart, someone he would need with an ache and the boy would mirror his need.
But this was unrealistic.
Even if the story was true he would probably be connected to someone on the other side of the world. Or a super heterosexual jock who feel a need to deny their connection in front of others – if Blaine gathered enough courage to tell the world that he was gay. Or it would be a girl who would fall in love with him and he wouldn't be able to return her feelings.
Of course he didn't tell Danny what his mom had told him. Then he would definitely find him utterly insane. Instead he kept it to himself and settled for his notions of how he would wish that person could be. Hopefully one that would share his love for Broadway and his passion for changing the world.
Time went by and he only felt the freezing sensation and back pains once in a while, but the humiliation and loneliness had turned into a nearly constant feeling and he didn't know if the depression it brought along was his own, or it was more from this supposed connection of his.
August turned into September and it didn't change no matter what Blaine was doing or thinking about. It was a steady stream of a strong hopelessness, and it didn't allow him to truly feel his own achievements – for example when he got a top grades or when he received a standing applause for singing his arguments on the debate team.
Until one week at the end of September. A strong sense of pride rushed in over him one afternoon he was at the mall with his mom. Suddenly he was beaming and butterflies were fluttering around his belly. It was a relief to finally get out of the dark and have some light for himself. The feeling continued throughout the week and he could feel the positive effect it had on his own life in terms of his energy getting better, he was much better mentally prepared for classes and he killed an audition for a local theater production. It only increased Saturday evening where he was washed over by an overwhelming pride and happiness – he allowed himself to bathe in the feeling and let it color his night with his mom and brother.
However, it was mostly pronounced by the end of the night when he was on his way to bed after a long, lovely afternoon where not even Cooper could steal his thunder. He had been through his moisturizing routine and put on his pajamas before he went downstairs to say goodnight to his mom as always.
When he walked into the living room a sensation took over him. It started as a sort of intense anxiety, followed almost immediately by a wave of relief and happiness filling him. It was different than anything he had ever felt. It rolled through his veins and made his heart throb so hard he wondered if it could get bruised against his ribs. Unable to stop it tears of happiness started streaming down his face and with a bright smile he threw his arms around his mom before she had a chance to prepare for it.
"What's up, honey? Are you okay?" She asked and squeezed him.
"I'm more than okay, mom. I'm good. I'm really, really happy," he assured her truthfully and tightened his grip before he smiled at her and said goodnight.
xXx
Kurt hadn't paid much attention to the feelings. He had been caught up in school and glee club, not to mention working for his dad and keeping his personal exercising program, and of course working on his outfits.
It was in the middle of October and stuff at school was chaos, but he pulled through. That was what Kurt did. Always.
One evening he had been doing an extended facial cleansing while watching E! Channel when he suddenly felt a surge of... nerves. He was nervous, but had no idea what for. It only continued for ten more minutes until it was replaced by a weird mix of relief and frustration.
He went to the bathroom to wash the green off his face and as he looked himself in the mirror to dry after what he saw was scaring him: his forehead was creased and his eyes were glassy. It was like he had been punched in the chest – and it had come out of nowhere.
He hated this. He hadn't told his dad about it. His dad definitely had enough to worry about without having to deal with Kurt's make-believe-feelings as well. He hadn't told anyone else either. No one would understand anyway, and would probably send him to see Miss Pillsbury – the slightly off-course guidance councilor of the school who would surely give him a pamphlet saying "So you are schizophrenic!" before a speech about it being normal to feel conflicted about your identity as a teenager. But Kurt knew who he was – only problem was that he didn't know where those strange emotions came from.
xXx
The next time Kurt got hit the strongest it was November. He had been experiencing a bit insecurity and nerves, sometimes humiliation, but sometimes there was also comfort and relief. It was only a little more than a week ago he had felt a lot of nerves and a strong rush of relief followed by happiness and then more nerves. Whatever was going on with him was scary and a bit uncomfortable.
It was Saturday night and he was going over his harmonies for his first solo in the glee club: one of his favorites songs, one that could change his role in the glee club since it was the one that should convince them all that he could sing songs meant for girls just as well as Rachel.
His mood had been a little swinging because even though he had found a sort of refuge in glee club he was still lonely and harassed on a daily basis – not to mention that Finn, the boy Kurt was achingly fond of who was the poster boy for popularity at WMHS was still stereotypical straight as ever and constantly caught in love triangles between Quinn and Rachel.
Right as Kurt checked the clock to find that it was 11 he figured he could just as well go to bed. However, he didn't get to that part. Instead he suddenly fell to the floor, his knees bucking under him with pain in his back and fear filling his body. From there on all he could do was be curled up on the floor in terror with tears on his face and sobbing echoing from his lungs.
There was no reason for him to feel that way. He was alone in his room and he had been singing and dancing only moments ago. It had come out of nowhere and he was paralyzed in the jar of his emotions.
"Kurt, what's going? What happened?" His dad was suddenly on his knees by his side, scooping his baby boy into his arms.
"I don't know. Dad, it just hurt. I'm so scared. Dad..." Kurt sobbed into his father's shoulder, clinging to him for dear life. His dad was equally as confused and terrified as Kurt himself and stayed on the floor with his arms around Kurt, letting him get it all out and cooing soothing sounds as he comforted him.
His entire body was screaming in pain. He cried hysterically until he was boneless and drained of energy. His dad helped him to bed and sat by his side until he fell asleep. The next few days he was more depressed than he could remember ever having been. He lost his appetite and didn't even do much about his appearance. He was scared, depressed and despair was filling every cell of his body.
xXx
Blaine was let out of the hospital mid-December. Danny wasn't as hurt as he was, so he had been let out after a few days, but had faithfully visited Blaine every day.
The guys who had beat them up got a warning from the school. Blaine's parents and Danny's parents had ran in and out of meetings with the principal and the school board, but little did it help. In the end Danny's father accepted a job he had been offered in Seattle so they had moved at the beginning of December. Now Blaine was more alone than ever.
His parents took him out of the school and he was glad – he couldn't go back to that place. He was constantly haunted by the faces of the guys who had been standing over him, kicking him and laughing while he was lying on the wet pavement, crying and trying to shield himself, but still doing his best to keep an eye on Danny who was just as helpless as he was. And of course there was the people who had been standing around and just watched, people he was in classes with, people he thought were his friends – no one had done a thing, some had even joined in with mocking homophobic yelling.
So he was coiled up at home, depressed and scared of the world. He could feel that his own despair was accompanied by despair in the form of the well-known feeling that wasn't his own. So he went back to fantasizing about this someone who supposedly should be his other half.
He wondered if this person could feel him the same way, and how they were experiencing what was happening to him right now. He wondered if they knew about him or was just as confused about these feelings as he was, and if they did know about him did they feel sorry for him right now? If this person was real, he had never wished to be with them as much as he did now – they would have to be the only person to make him feel safe again.
A few days after he came home from the hospital his mom told him that they had found him a new school. He would be starting straight after Christmas and they would make sure to help him catch up on what he had missed while being out of school.
It was a fancy school with a zero-bully-tolerance policy, school uniforms, teachers addressed as professors and a lacrosse team. It was a two hour drive from his house, but Blaine was willing to do that. If he could be safe. That was the only thing he needed.
He hadn't been there himself but his mom had come home from her meeting with the principal she had been excited and showed him pictures on their website. She had cried and told him that she would never let anyone hurt him again. Yeah, Blaine had been crying a lot himself over the past few weeks.
But maybe this could be the place he would find out if this story of soulmates were true. Maybe this new school would be where he would meet his other half.
Comments
this story is awesome - can't wait to read more :)
this is so perfect. like really! its just wonderfully amazing and i love it. i have never been disappointed about any of your stories. you are an amazing writer and i cant wait for more to come :) congrats <3
asdfghjkl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Interesting. Looking forward to more!
I can't wait til they meet
Wow this story is really good. It may actually be my favorite of the stories that I am reading right now. I found myself trying to guess what events were occuring that were causing the boys to have the feelings and seeing if I was right. I can't wait to read chapter 3 and to get closer to Kurt and Blaine meeting.
I hope you continue this. I LOVE soulmate stories.