Blaine can handle the whole ‘giving Kurt space' thing for about all of one day. It's not that Blaine wants to push himself onto Kurt, or that he doesn't respect that Kurt needs time....It's just that Blaine feels like he's been waiting for this for so long - they're both single, and Kurt finally knows that Blaine's gay. And yet, still, Blaine needs to wait before he can even make a move

Perhaps Valentine's Day would be perfect timing, Blaine thinks. It's when he's over at Jeff's place with Nick, the three of them lazing around on his bed and enjoying the fact that they've just handed in a rather difficult English paper, that Blaine decides that he could really use his friends' advice.

"So Valentine's Day's coming up and Kurt's now single," Blaine begins.

"What's the plan?" asks Nick, sitting up immediately.

"Serenade him at school?"

Jeff and Nick scoff.

"No!"

"Definitely not!"

"What?" asks Blaine, genuinely perplexed.  "Grand gesture as a sign of my love? What's so bad about that?"

"Well, for one, I think you're forgetting about the fact that you're not even publically out," says Jeff. "How are you going to explain that one?"

"Yeah, huge gestures from one presidential candidate's son to another don't usually go unnoticed," adds Nick. "Sorry, dude, you're going to have to be a little more subtle."

So Blaine settles on something a little less grand. He's not quite fond of how cliché it is - in his eyes, Kurt deserves something a bit more unique - but he arranges for flowers to be sent to Kurt's school, a bouquet of bright red roses that he specifically requests to be hung from Kurt's locker ("Not in a tacky way though, if you can. I just want them there to greet him when he gets there in the morning. Message? Um, how about ‘Happy Valentine's Day, Kurt! Can't wait to see you this weekend!" And could you sign it with just B, and maybe two x's? Thankyou!"). It's not the perfect sign of his affection, but Blaine can only hope that he'll be able to give Kurt better Valentines' in the years to come.

Come Valentine's Day, however, Blaine is regretting his choice. His phone buzzes in his pocket while he's on his way to his first class, and he pulls it out to see that it's a message from Kurt. A lump rises in his throat. This is it, he thinks. He slides his phone unlocked and reads the text...and he doesn't think he's ever felt more disappointed in his life.

Thankyou so much for the flowers, Blaine!

A thankyou. No sign that the gesture had been unwelcome, but no sign of reciprocated feelings either. Blaine's pretty sure that he just received his very first rejection.

Blaine thinks he can at least push it to the back of his mind when he gets to class, but apparently not. Nick, perched atop a desk and smiling down at Jeff, calls Blaine over as soon as he gets there.

"Hey, dude! Check this out!" he says.

When Blaine crosses the room to meet them, Nick shoves in his face a photo he has up on his phone. It's of Kurt. Most of his face is hidden behind a bouquet of roses, except for his eyes, adorably wide and staring straight into the camera.

It's a tweet, Blaine realises when he reads the caption below it.

@kurtelizabethhummel: this was on my locker this morning - feeling the love! hope you're all having just as amazing a valentines day! xx

"It doesn't matter," says Blaine with a shrug, his voice lowered so none of their classmates will hear them. "He texted me just then to say ‘thanks'."

"So?" says Jeff.

"No, Blaine's right. That's bad," says Nick. "There's usually at least like, some sign they like you back when they respond."

"You guys are reading into things too much," says Jeff, rolling his eyes. "He said so himself that it made him feel loved, and that he's having an amazing day."

"Yeah, but he never said anything about loving where they came from," says Blaine "I should have never expected someone like him to like someone like me."

Blaine slumps into the chair beside his friends.

"Hey," says Nick, leaning down to put his hand on Blaine's shoulder. "Maybe he just needs time. And you're still seeing Wicked with him this weekend right?"

Blaine nods, sighing to himself. He just hopes that the flowers won't make their weekend together awkward.

Blaine has already seen Wicked live - his mother had booked their family tickets to a Broadway showing while they had been in New York the previous summer. Of course, Blaine doesn't mind seeing it again, especially seeing as Kurt is there. But having seen it before makes him feel a little less guilty about spending most of the time fixated, not on the performance in front of them, but instead on Kurt beside him. He can't help it. Particularly when Kurt's pushed up the arm rest between them, so that his hand, laying at the very edge of his seat, is clearly visible to Blaine. It's right there, close enough to hold, but Blaine doesn't want to do anything that'll make things uncomfortable. Because by some miracle, despite the flowers, everything had seemed fine when Blaine and Kurt had been the first to arrive at the theatre. There had been a bit of fumbling over tickets and a moment where they had both visibly struggled with whether they should greet each other with a hug before deciding not to, but definitely no real danger signs.

But now, under the cover of darkness, there's nothing but space between them, and Blaine doesn't know what Kurt wants. He thinks maybe it's just a friendly gesture but then he notices that the armrest between Mercedes and Kurt is still down. But perhaps that's just because Sam and Mercedes are cuddled in close and coupley. Oh wait, but if Sam and Mercedes have removed their armrest and Kurt has removed the one between him and Blaine, does that mean that Kurt and Blaine are on a date as well? Had Kurt meant this as a double date? But that wouldn't make sense seeing as Kurt had asked Blaine to the musical back before he was single. Although perhaps his mindset has changed now that he is single and he knows of Blaine's intentions...

Before Blaine knows it, the first half is already over and he's still going on that same long-winded trail of thought. When they return to their seats after intermission, Blaine decides he might as well just go for it. As the next act begins, he interlaces his fingers with Kurt's, shifting them slightly so that they're in a more comfortable position. Kurt doesn't look at him, gaze fixed on the stage, but a small squeeze of Blaine's hand reassures Blaine that the gesture is a welcome one.

It's nice, having Kurt's hand, soft and warm, in Blaine's. And nicer still when Kurt begins to trace small circles on the back of Blaine's hand with his thumb.

It's all so little, and yet Blaine doesn't quite want it to end. Doesn't want this - whatever this is - to be something restricted to the darkness of theatres and the privacy of each other's houses. He wants this to happen, and he doesn't want to have to hide it.

When the final act finishes and they exit the theatre, the four of them decide to get some ice cream at a parlour nearby. Sam and Mercedes lead the way, walking with linked arms some metres ahead of Kurt and Blaine. Kurt and Blaine are back to standing apart, Blaine with his hands buried deep in his coat pockets so he doesn't do anything he regrets. There's a comfortable silence between them for most of the way.

"You know I can't do it, you know," says Kurt suddenly.

"Can't do what?" Blaine asks, but he's afraid he already knows the answer.

"I can't go out with someone who isn't out," says Kurt. "I can't do the hiding and the sneaking around - or maybe I can but I don't want to. And I don't think I should have to."

"Does that mean that if I came out, properly and fully, you'd go out with me?" Blaine tries hopefully.

"Well, yes," says Kurt, and Blaine can tell by the furrowing of his eyebrows that Blaine's reaction isn't what Kurt had been expecting. "But Blaine. I don't want you to come out for me. That's something you have to do in your own time."

Blaine thinks about the only reason he's still not completely out. He thinks about his mum, about how terrified she is - terrified for him. But then he thinks about that conversation he'd had with Kurt from what seems like months ago, about if he were to stay in the closet all through college. Think about how many relationships you'll have missed out on. And Blaine knows in his heart that he'll never forgive himself if he misses out on this one with Kurt.

"Do you remember that day when I came out to you?" Blaine starts thoughtfully. "You told me that I shouldn't have to come out for anyone else, but I shouldn't have to hide for anyone else either? Well, I'm done hiding, even if - and I feel really selfish saying this - even if it scares the hell out of my mum. This is something I need to do."

"You're not selfish," says Kurt, shaking his head. "Blaine, this is your truth. But coming out for me, that's no better than not coming out for someone else. This should be about you, not anybody else. Especially seeing as I don't want this to lead to anger or resentment or -"

Blaine shakes his head, more to himself than anything

"I'm doing it for me," he says resolutely. "I don't want me being in the closet to be what stops whatever it is that's going to happen between us. Because you said it yourself. I don't want to go through life falling in love with people and not being able to act on it. I don't want to think about all the could-have-beens, I want them to actually happen. And I want that with you more than I've wanted it with anyone."

Kurt inhales, a shuddering intake of breath as he takes it all in.

"Okay," says Kurt, nodding. "Just...be prepared for the political bombardment that's to come."

Blaine nods. He's ready. Kurt may be part of the reason that Blaine wants to come out, but he's still doing it for himself. And, quite frankly, after all the ways that he's tried living for other people, he thinks it's about time he starts living for himself.