2

The next days were awkward, to say the least. Blaine had not texted him goodnight like he usually did and he hadn’t met him at his car with a coffee and a smile like every other morning. They sat in their classes avoiding each others eyes and shying away every time they came too close. At lunchtime Kurt tried to make conversation telling Blaine about his difficulties with the transfer. Blaine replied calmly and showed polite interest while staring at his food and shifting it around on his plate. At some point Kurt gave up. The awareness that they weren’t even able to uphold a decent conversation after what had happened the day before making it all too real. They finished their meals in silence and went off to their separate afternoon classes.

Days went by in a blur with Kurt having appointments with the respective headmasters of Dalton and McKinley, hurrying to fill out all the paper work and buying all the material he would need for his new classes. He texted Blaine a few times but his answers always took forever and lacked the usual smiley faces, inside jokes and just the general interest he used to have in Kurt’s life, activities and thoughts.

And then suddenly everything was settled and Kurt was in the office of Mrs. Milton, the Dalton secretary, returning his uniform. He felt reluctant to hand it over, as if it was the last thing that would keep him and Blaine connected. But then he remembered that it was for the best and let go of the little package. He walked down the hallways outside of the common rooms, fighting the mental images of Blaine’s love smitten, hopeful eyes that he hadn’t seen happy in such a long time. He considered finding some of the Dalton boys to say goodbye but decided that dramatic exits were not his style and walked back to his car.

When he reached the driver’s door he looked up to find Blaine leaning against it with his arms crossed kicking pebbles on the ground. “Uhm hi?” he said with all the confusion he felt sounding in his voice. Blaine immediately straightened up and gave him a half smile. He seemed more relaxed than the days before, even a little content again. “You’re not in your uniform anymore.” he said eyeing Kurt’s outfit.

“No, I just returned it. It felt odd to hand it in, like a final step.” Blaine smiled at that nodding lightly. “But on the other hand, it’s amazing to be able to wear all those perfect ensembles again that were hidden away in my closet all this time.”

“Yes definitely.” Blaine answered with a small grin. ”And what a loss it would be to the world if we couldn’t see your marvelous fashion mind at work everyday.”

“Precisely.” Kurt said attempting a half twirl to show off the details on his jacket. “So I was wondering whether you’d like to grab a coffee at the Lima Bean before you’re off to McKinley?” Blaine asked tentatively again, the fear of rejection visible in the way he was leaning back and looking down at his hands. “Yes of course. I’d love that.” Kurt quickly said waving Blaine along to get into his car.

They immediately fell into a light conversation about the differences between their schools and what it was going to be like for Kurt to adjust to the insanity of the New Directions again.

An hour later when they were comfortably sitting at their table with their half empty cups of coffee Kurt had almost forgotten that anything bad had ever happened between them. He was still working on getting that painful sting under control that ripped his heart a little everytime he looked at Blaine for too long but at least Blaine seemed more at ease and chattered away like he always had, talking wildly with his hands and laughing at all the snarky remarks that Kurt made.

Yet sometimes when they fell into a short comfortable silence and Kurt looked at someone at the bar or just let his gaze wander out the window he caught Blaine staring at him with that sad confused look he had been wearing ever since Kurt bolted from the common room two weeks ago.

Kurt’s days back at McKinley began the next morning and he was welcomed back lovingly by almost everyone. He fell back into his old routine quickly which made it a lot easier to get over not seeing Blaine who had never been part of that routine. They texted once in a while or talked on the phone but Kurt soon noticed that silence made it a lot easier to deal with his pain.

He actively worked on telling himself everyday that a new era in Kurt Hummel’s life had now begun. No more pining after boys, no more romantic musicals or daydreaming. He tried finding things that would distract him and stayed away from the glee club girls as much as possible, since their constant chatter about dating annoyed him to no end. They also gave up on asking him about Blaine, figuring that things were over between them and instead tried fixing Kurt up with random guys they suspected to be gay. Kurt just kept rolling his eyes at them and quickly walked away.

He saw Blaine again after a long time one Saturday night. They had tickets for a show they had bought months ago. Kurt remembered how excited he was back then, going on about all the secret details nobody knew about the original cast. Blaine just laughed with him or asked questions until a few days after the purchase, when their excitement had worn off and they had decided to just wait for those weeks to finally pass.

It was odd to think back to those times and it felt as if it had been two other people. They met in front of the theater. Blaine was wearing one of his stupid scarves that made his eyes look amazing and some nice dark leather gloves that made him look like a gentleman. Kurt failed miserably at not noticing these things and asked him about school and his family.

They hadn’t talked in a very long time. A lot had happened and for fear of what to say, Kurt ended up saying very little. They just settled on watching the play and agreed in all aspects when talking about it in the car ride home. Kurt had never felt so disconnected from Blaine since the day he met him. He stared into his lap and listened to Blaine humming to the radio until they pulled up in front of his house.

They walked up to Kurt’s porch together in silence. Kurt remembered that he used to feel giddy with excitement everytime they had done that in the past, something unsaid buzzing between them. Now it felt clinical, distant and uncomfortable.

Kurt mumbled a short goodbye and turned to enter the house when he suddenly felt Blaine’s hand in his pulling him back. He didn’t look at him, staring at the ground and immediately dropping Kurt’s hand again. “Kurt, please. Can we just..” he sighed and looked up tears shining in his eyes. “Please, are we ever going to talk about this?” Kurt felt a lump in his throat, he immediately knew what “this” meant and it made him want to run back to his house and hide there forever. Instead he returned Blaine’s pleading look with a stern expression and shook his head. “I’m sorry Blaine. I need to go. Thanks for driving me, I had a nice time. Goodnight.” with that he turned and walked into his house.