June 23, 2013, 3:17 p.m.
Confused Colors: Chapter 4
T - Words: 1,726 - Last Updated: Jun 23, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 6/? - Created: Jun 15, 2013 - Updated: Jun 23, 2013 158 0 0 0 0
Kurt laughed, a nervous gleam in his eyes as he watched the back of Blaine's head warily. There was no doubt that he was having an amazing time with his new friends... but still. It wasn't the same without Blaine... Lovely Blaine, who Kurt was sure he'd horribly mistreated. Kurt internally chastised himself.
He would get over Blaine.
Kurt knew losing Blaine meant more than losing a simple crush. Blaine was... everything. Well, not everything, but here, at Dalton, Blaine was his rock. His first (possibly best) friend, his mentor and of course, the boy he was hopelessly devoted to. Kurt cringed about the times he's sung 'Hopelessly Devoted To You' to the numerous pictures of Blaine he had in his room.
Kurt couldn't bear to lose Blaine. It's definitely better to have him as just a friend, Kurt thought. Blaine was... amazing. Having a best friend that connected that way with you was much better than pining over not only a lost love, but a lost friend.
So Kurt would get over Blaine. He would ask Blaine out to coffee after practice, as always. He would apologize and he would move on.
Easy, right? Friends.
Blaine was beyond thrilled. Kurt had talked to him. Not only had he talked to him, hewas taking Blaine out for coffee. Back to normal, eh? Blaine decided that he'd apologize to Kurt for his outburst and finally get around to facing his feelings. It wasn't fair to Kurt. He watched Kurt get their coffee and stretched his legs, nerves creeping in.
He heard Kurt's soft, sweet laughter tinkle over from the counter. Blaine looked up to see Kurt smile brightly as he spoke on the phone. Blaine watched Kurt's eyes light up and rattle off a snarky comment in response to whatever joke had made on the other line. Blaine smiled as he watched Kurt's face soften as he hung up, picked up their coffee and made his way back to their table.
"Who was that?" Blaine asked brightly.
"Oh, Jeff! We're meeting after this to work on our French homework..." Kurt picked up his mocha and took a sip. "So, Blaine Warbler," Kurt asked, his eyes gleaming. "How've you been? I take your date with Rachel was good?"
"Oh, Kurt - " Blaine began.
"Sorry about that, by the way. At BreadStix? We didn't know you'd be there..." Kurt interrupted.
"Actually, we didn't-" Blaine tried again.
"I know it was probably amazing, you too are pretty compatible... You're both stars..." Kurt dropped his gaze and stared at his coffee cup like it held the secret of life.
"Kurt!" Blaine grabbed Kurt's hands and forced him to look into his eyes. "Stop right there. First off, you were right. It was just the alcohol. Rachel and I went to BreadStix totally platonic. I'm 100% gay. Second, I'm doing great. I missed you though. Lastly, Kurt what are you talking about? You're the biggest star I know. You're amazing, Kurt. Amazing talented and beau-"
"Stop, Blaine." Kurt slowly pried his hands away from Blaine's. "I'm happy that you figured yourself out. I really am. And I'm so sorry for everything I said. I said some pretty awful stuff back there... for your information, I have absolutelynothingagainst bisexuals.. that was mean and I'm really sorry."
"Kurt, actually-" Kurt cut him off with his hand.
"Let me finish Blaine. I'm so sorry, about everything! I want to start over, right now. As friends. I think of you as my best friend, Blaine. I can't lose you and I hate fighting with you... Can you forgive me?" Kurt looked him, crystal clear eyes, big and blue. Blaine melted.
"Of course I forgive you, Kurt! You're my best friend too, I hated these past few days, honestly! Also, I'm really sorry too. I said some awful things... I'm so glad we're over this." Blaine smiled and tried to grasp Kurt's hand again, but Kurt pulled his hands away.
"Awesome!" Kurt smiled and everything was okay again. The two boys caught up and laughed over Rachel's strange yet (in Kurt's opinion), totally expected reaction.
However, as the hour wore on, Blaine noticed Kurt seemed a little... guarded. Blaine shook it off as silly and reminded himself that they were okay. They were totally okay. And everything was going to be okay.
Kurt grinned without any inhibition. Today was truly going better than he expected. Blaine and him had talked it out and they were okay! Kurt couldn't be happier. He put forth extra effort in thinking before speaking and keeping physical contact to a minimum. Kurt was sure that he was already making it up to Blaine. His feelings, they probably needed a bit more time to figure themselves out, but Kurt was an amazing actor.
Kurt looked over at Blaine who was describing some crazy idea he'd cooked up to steal Wes's gavel for a day. He thought it'd be the perfect prank for April Fool's day.
"Isn't it a little early for that? I mean, we are still in the repercussions of Valentine's Day... Quite serious repercussions, if I recall correctly." Kurt grinned as Blaine flushed bright red.
"That was one time! And come on, I'm not great at romance, but -"
"No buts, Mr. Anderson! You sang a song that's... basically about... foreplay, if I understand correctly, to a closeted man around 4 or 5 years older than you... How old is he anyway? Jeremiah?" Kurt tried to make his smile seem natural.
"Oh um... well, he's 21." Blaine looked down and blushed. He looked up just in time to see Kurt's eyes bug out.
"Blaine. I have... no words." Kurt stared at him for a good 15 seconds with an expression somewhere between amused and shocked when his phone beeped and vibrated.
Hey Kurt! Are we still on for later today? How are things going with Blainers? ;) -Jeff
Kurt read the text message and broke out into a huge smile.
Are you trying to cancel on me? How are things with Nicky-poo? :P And yeah, we're definitely still on... unless you and Nick have something better to do...? ;) -Kurt
He looked up to see Blaine looking at him curiously.
"Oh, um.. that was Jeff. Be sure to thank you, because I'm sure he saved you from a century of embarrassment... at least!" Kurt laughed at Blaine's expression.
"What are you talking about?" Blaine asked, flabbergasted.
"Oh Blaine, if you were any redder, you'd be an over-sized tomato!" Kurt giggled, a teasing smile playing his lips.
Blaine was about to answer when Kurt stood up suddenly.
"Wow, look at the time! This was awesome, Blaine, really! I had a lot of fun today, but I got to go...Text me later?" Kurt smiled down at Blaine.
"Yeah, of course Kurt!" Blaine replied, a little flustered that Kurt was leaving so soon. He stood to give Kurt a hug, but Kurt patted him on the arm and dashed away.
"Huh..." Blaine slumped in his seat, watching the boy he loved scurry away. His plan to tell Kurt about his feelings flew out the window.
Just friends. I can work with that... For Kurt.
Blaine stood up and tossed his barely touched medium drip into the trash.
Kurt sighed. Things with Blaine had gone excellent today. He didn't know whether to jump in joy or cry in frustration. Kurt liked Blaine so much it hurt... But Blaine didn't like him back and the last thing Kurt wanted was to make him uncomfortable. Kurt shook head angrily and turned on the radio to distract himself.
" -and for all suffering from a broken heart or unrequited love, hey guys! This one's for us!" the radio DJ called cheerfully as a familiar piano scale came on.
Oh, how appropriate.Kurt leaned back in his seat, smiling softly as he sang along.
Dreams, that's where I have to go
To see your beautiful face anymore
I stare at a picture of you and listen to the radio
Hope, hope there's a conversation
We both admit we had it good
But until then it's alienation, I know
That much is understood
And I realize
If you ask me how I'm doing
I would say I'm doing just fine
I would lie and say that you're not on my mind
But I go out and I sit down at a table set for two
And finally I'm forced to face the truth,
No matter what I say I'm not over you, not over you
Kurt wiped at his eyes and realized, no.I'm not over Blaine, not yet.Kurt stopped at the intersection and groaned, resting his head on the wheel while listening to the rest of the song.
Damn, damn girl, you do it well
And I thought you were innocent
Took this heart and put it through hell
But still you're magnificent
I, I'm a boomerang, doesn't matter how you throw me
I turn around and I'm back in the game
Even better than the old me
But I'm not even close without you
Kurt sang the next chorus loudly with radio, pouring out his heart through the words.
And if I had the chance to renew
You know there isn't a thing I wouldn't do
I could get back on the right track
But only if you'd be convinced
So until then...
Kurt cringed visibly as he whispered the bridge.This is what I'm doing right now.Kurt thought, rather miserably.I'm getting back on track with Blaine. I'm fixing things.Kurt sang the last chorus with new found determination.
If you ask me how I'm doing
I would say I'm doing just fine
I would lie and say that you're not on my mind
But I go out and I sit down at a table set for two
And finally I'm forced to face the truth,
The bitter truth.
Nomatter what I say I'm not over you
Not over you
Not yet
Not over you
But I will be.
Not over you.
Kurt sniffed and pushed all thought of Blaine to the back of his head as found himself grinning and bopping along to the upbeat song that came on next.
Just shoot for the stars, if it feels right...
Sometimes, it was nice to just forget.
Jeff walked into the senior commons and picked a table, dropping his stuff down. He looked around for Kurt and found himself grinning. Kurt must be having a pretty good time if hestillwasn't here. Jeff was already late by about 15 minutes. He blushed when he thought about the reason he was late. He and Nick had met up after rehearsal and went out for coffee. He thought about their coffee date and wondered if he'd ever have the balls to ask Nick out.. or something.
Kurt burst in the door.
"I need to get over Blaine." He said, fierce determination in his eyes.
Oh boy.