Chapter 13

"What was that?" Kurt asked Blaine the next day. "I think he must be schizophrenic or bi-polar or something Blaine.

Blaine just laughed. "Maybe hes a guy that thinks he needs to be someone else all the time, but now realizes that he can just be himself with us."

Kurt shook his head. "Im not buying it Blaine. I think its more like keep your friends close and your enemies closer. I just cant trust him. Hes got something up his sleeve like befriend the husband so that he can get invited over or something. He just makes my skin crawl."

"Youve gotta learn to trust Kurt. Or at least, let things go. Maybe hes doing that, but maybe hes what I said. Only time will tell. We just need to be honest with him all the time and see what happens. I dont mean completely let our guard down, but maybe if were honest, hell trust us and befriend us. Everyone could use a friend." Blaine always made sense. How could he be so calm about Caleb. Caleb who said sexual things to his husband, Caleb who was a model and who thought he was hot.

"I hate this. I need to stop thinking about this and think about school tomorrow. Im freaking out Blaine. All this stuff with Caleb thats happening on top of school starting and my internship. Then the whole outfit in the show. Just so much is happening too fast." Kurt started to pace the floor. "I dont even know if I have everything for school. I dont know if I have what it takes to do all of this at the same time." Blaine recognized this Kurt. It had been a long while since something like this happened, but Blaine was all too familiar with it. He was working himself up beyond control. "What if everyone hates me? What am I doing here? Maybe Im not good enough." Kurt was starting to hyperventilate and his head started to hang with worry. Blaine was there in a flash with his hands on Kurts shoulders leading him to the couch.

"First, love, you need to breathe. You need to breathe." Blaines voice remained calm. He knew he needed to stay calm if Kurt was going to calm down. He hoped that he could stop it all before it started. He kept himself level so that Kurt didnt see how worried he really was.

Kurt shook his head a few times. Everything seemed to spiral out of control fast. "C-cant." Tears started to stream down his face. "B-Bl- C-Ccan." Kurt started wheezing which was different from any other time.

Blaine panicked a little but hoped it didnt show. He needed Kurt to stay calm. "Kurt, you need to listen carefully to my voice. Close your eyes and listen to my voice baby."

"If d-die.. l-love.." Kurt was beyond control in mere seconds. It was far worse than the other times. Blaine wasnt sure, but it sounded like Kurt was saying that he thought he was going to die.

"CLOSE YOUR EYES KURT AND LISTEN TO ME." Blaine yelled to try to get through to Kurt. He needed Kurt to listen. Blaine was close to losing it now. He ran his fingers into Kurts hair trying to soothe his husband. He realized a bit late that yelling was probably not the best choice. Kurt was sobbing in response to being yelled at. Blaine lowered his voice and calmed to a whisper. "Youre not allowed to leave me, baby. Were forever. Please take a deep breath with me. Im going to count like I always do and were going to breathe together. One, two, three, four, five. Exhale."

Kurt refused to listen and Blaine knew he was going to pass out if he refused to listen. "T-trying."

"You cant leave me Kurt. You cant.. now TRY HARDER." Kurts head shot up at the command and Blaine hoped that the firmness in his voice was finally getting through to him. Blaine was one second away from calling 9-1-1 when Kurt took a deep breath while tears trailed down his face. Blaine held Kurts face in his hands caressing his cheeks with his thumbs and placing gentle kisses to his forehead. "Good sweetheart. Another one. I know you can do it. Come on my love, for me." Blaine lovingly handled Kurt with tenderness and kisses until the entire panic attack subsided and he collapsed into his arms. Kurt clung to him for a good fifteen minutes sobbing before falling asleep in his arms. Blaine was completely content to just hold him. He did just that. He held Kurt while he slept, all the while rubbing circles into his lower back. He felt like he almost lost Kurt today though it wouldnt happen for a long time. Just the thought of losing Kurt made Blaine cry. He held on to Kurt possessively as he cried softly. That was the worst panic attack Kurt had ever had and it was scary.

When Kurt awoke, it was late in the day. His eyes didnt focus quickly as he blinked repeatedly and rubbed them with his hands. When he focused, he could see Blaine sitting on the floor leaning against the couch reading a book. Kurt was breathing easy. He knew what had happened. Kurts voice scratched out. "Hey. Thank you." He reached a hand down to Blaines. Blaine entwined their fingers together as he put the book down and turned to face Kurt. Kurt looked exhausted from the panic attack earlier.

"You never have to thank me. Youre my husband, Id do anything for you, you know." Blaines thumb rubbed Kurts hand gently.

Kurt smiled wearily. "What time is it?"

"Its almost five oclock. Are you feeling better?" Blaine rested his head on their clasped hands and his other hand rubbed Kurts leg gently in a comforting motion.

Kurt sighed as he smacked his lips together. "Im better. Im still a little groggy."

"Do you think you might want to see a doctor about some medication?"

"Not yet. You know I rarely ever get them. I think the stress has been getting to me." He yawned and smacked his lips together again.

"Let me get you something to drink, okay?" Blaine stood up before bending over to kiss Kurt on the lips. "Just stay here okay? Rest just a bit longer." Blaine left and returned with water. Blaines concern was real. "Are you up to your first day of school tomorrow?"

"I have to be." Kurt felt the worry. Blaine was worried too. He hadnt had that bad of an attack in a while. "I just feel like Im not in control right now because theres so much going on."

Blaine rubbed Kurts arm gently. "What can I do to make it easier?"

"I dont think theres anything specific you can do. Just be there for me and support me through my craziness." Kurt took a big gulp of water.

"Youre not crazy. Its normal to feel the stress. Im feeling it too."

"But you dont act like this. I sometimes ..." Kurt paused. It was easy to see that he didnt want to say anything. "I sometimes wonder if Im really weak and youre really strong."

"Oh Kurt. Youre not. Youre not weak at all. We are both strong. Sometimes one of us is stronger than the other, but neither of us is weak. We wouldnt have gotten through all of the crap weve been through if we were weak. If anything, I think youre stronger than me."

Kurt laughed. "Im pretty sure youre the alpha male in this relationship. Im definitely the stereotype, but it makes me quite fabulous with fashion and only few can be this fantastic, you know."

That was his Kurt, the strong opinionated husband. "Thats what I like to hear. You are fantastic and dont forget it. Everyone out there hasnt figured it out yet." Blaine stopped talking for minute and his brow furrowed in thought. He wasnt sure how to address the alpha male comment, but felt like he needed to. "Kurt, you know youre a man right?" Blaine took Kurts face in his hands as he sat on the floor near Kurts face. Kurt nodded. "I like guys with dicks, right?" Kurt nodded with a chuckle and a smile. "It doesnt matter who people think is the stronger one. We know that we both have our strengths and weaknesses. We complement each other and thats how all of this works. I love you and you love me. Thats all that matters. Thats all I care about. You understand what Im trying to say?"

Kurt lay there with a sweet smile on his face. "Yeah. Youre saying that you dont want me to feel bad if people view you as the alpha male in our relationship."

Blaine caressed Kurts cheek with the back of his fingers. They trailed gently along his alabaster perfect skin. "What Im saying is that there is no alpha male in this relationship. We are both alphas at one point in time or another. Geez, whatever you use on your face works really well. Its soft and silky." His fingers trailed to Kurts lip where they rubbed his lower lip gently before his fingers were replaced with Blaine lips. Blaine nipped and sucked at the lip he was gently caressing a few seconds ago. His breathing already heavy as his tongue dipped out to taste his bottom lip. "Kurt. You always have the softest lips and taste so perfect." Blaine finally crawled up on the sofa covering Kurts body with his. He lay down on top of Kurt, arms resting gently on either side of Kurts face as he kissed him thoroughly, leaving him breathless and begging. Blaine could feel the hardness in Kurts pants as he involuntarily ground down on him.

"Oh, Blaine.. Feels good." Kurts eyes closed at the feeling of Blaines hard dick rubbing against him.

Blaine stopped grinding his hips to Kurts. "Is this too much?"

"No. Not enough." Kurt whined.

"Are you still too tired from the panic attack? We can eat and watch some TV."

"Or you could fuck me so that I get my release and then relax over the whole panic attack." Kurt smiled hopefully.

"Do you really think you need to ask?"

"Apparently, I must since we are both fully clothed dry humping on the couch." Blaine ripped the front of Kurts shirt open. Kurt gasped at the force with which Blaine was handling him. Alpha male indeed. Kurt said nothing, just waited. "Ill buy you a new shirt love. Right now, we need to get these pants off of you, so that I can fuck you properly."

Blaine ripped Kurts pants open as quickly as he could, peeling them off and scooting down to rest between Kurts legs. Blaine couldnt be bothered by his limbs right now and took one of Kurts leg propping it up on the back of the couch and the other off the side of the couch. "Thank God for your long legs." Blaine sat back on his heels and pumped Kurts cock a few times, spreading the pre come around the velvety head and whatever was left, down his shaft. Kurts legs were spread wide. He lay there open for the taking. "You have the most beautiful cock Kurt. Perfect, just like you." Blaine licked up the shaft once before sucking on the head and pressing his tongue against the sensitive ridge.

"Shit Blaine. F-feels s-so good." He stuttered out when it happened.

Blaine loved sucking cock. He stretched his full lips around Kurt and sunk down as far as he could, stopping only when he felt Kurts cock hit the back of his throat. He moaned around Kurts cock, sucking hard as he lifted his head releasing it with a pop. Kurts fingers laced into the dark curls on Blaines head as he threw his head back and moaned loudly. Blaines fingers massaged his balls and rubbed his perineum gently urged on by motivational sighs and gasps emanating from Kurts perfectly cherry mouth.

Blaine could feel Kurts grip on his hair tighten and release with every lick or gentle prod and it motivated him more. Kurt needed this time away from all the thoughts in his head and Blaine would do this all day if it would take away the ugly thoughts that had Kurt reeling in panic. He sucked slowly and continued to squeeze and suck beautiful sighs from those perfect cherry lips. Kurt was completely debauched. Blaine had sucked, licked and kissed his thighs, hips, balls and cock. Kurt was flushed and looked as if he were in an entirely different world. Blaine smiled that he could give Kurt this little vacation. All fucking aside, Blaine was thoroughly enjoying this. He enjoyed the control and liked to be the alpha when Kurt let him. "Youre so beautiful Kurt."

"Oh God. Blaine, I love you so much." Kurt looked down at his lover and husband with lust blown eyes. His eyelids were almost too heavy to keep open, though he wanted to be able to keep them open to watch Blaines mouth around him.

"Shh. Let me take care of you." With that, Blaine sunk down around Kurts cock and sucked in rhythm. All thoughts of sex moved to the back of his list of needs. He wanted to keep Kurt in this blissful state where he didnt worry about anything. That was part of Blaine. Blaine had this internal need to always protect Kurt and make Kurt happy. It had nothing to do with being in control, it had to do with his completed and utter love and devotion to this man that saved him and made him who he was today.

Blaines jaw was starting to become sore from all the sucking and teasing. His lips were plump from kissing and sucking hickeys on Kurts hips and thighs. He sucked with more energy as if he was born to complete the task at hand. Kurts hands gripped the couch. He had been holding on by a thread through all of Blaines teasing, but now he was ready to let go and it seemed to be Blaines mission as well. Clearly, Blaine had a completely separate mission than what they set out for.

Blaines fingers gently rolled Kurt balls and then his finger slid further to rub circles around his hole. Kurt occasionally lifted his hips which caused his butt cheeks to squeeze on Blaines finger. "Fuck Blaine. Thats so fucking hot. Youre so fucking gorgeous and youre mouth is like magic."

Blaine knew that Kurt was close so he sped up and sucked harder. He was painfully hard and his own jeans were pressing far too hard on his cock. Blaine continued to suck with all his might until he heard Kurt keen loudly. Blaine smiled while still sucking. There was a satisfaction that you got when your husband was coming in your mouth and Blaine was satisfied as he swallowed around Kurts pulsating cock. It was euphoric, the taste of Kurt in his mouth. Blaine reached down to rub his painfully hard cock over his jeans. It only took three hard strokes before Blaine was muttering his pleasure, head dropped to Kurts hip while he came hard.

He collapsed back on the couch while Kurt was still spread out. When Blaine regained enough consciousness to speak, he looked down to find that Kurt was out. Blaine decided to fix him up and cover him with a blanket. He tucked Kurt in on the couch and headed off to the bathroom to clean up the mess in his pants. He chuckled at himself in the mirror. His lips were cherry red from overuse and his pupils were still blown and his hair was like a huge afro on top of his head. Kurt did a number on the curls when he was tugging fiercely. Blaine proceeded to attempt to harness his unruly hair finally landing on a slightly gelled but curly look that he knew Kurt would like too.

"Kurt Hummel."

"Here!" Kurt yelled from the back of the room.

"Mr. Hummel is a Design major." Professor List announced. "Mr. Hummel, what do you think this class is going to do for you?"

Kurt didnt know there was any homework as he sifted through his course information to figure out what this was even about. He didnt know and he didnt know why she picked on him. "Im sorry Professor List. Im not familiar with the coursework for this class." Kurt hung his head in embarrassment.

"Well, thats really too bad Mr. Hummel. Ms. Johnson, can you tell me what this class will do for you?" She continued down the list. Kurt felt a little better when the girl after him didnt know either. It was the next person after her that finally gave her the answer. "Thank you Ms. Kildare. That is correct. So Mr. Hummel and Ms. Johnson, if you did any prior thought to the class before entering the door, you would have known that this class will prepare you for speaking to people in the world of Fashion. It will teach you to read, write and converse at a certain level with other designers, critics and others that you will come in contact during the course of your career in fashion. I suggest you," She looked directly at Kurt, "and Ms. Johnson, pay attention. You have a lot of learning to do."

Kurt was not happy. This was not supposed to be how his first class started. "Yes Professor List."

"Mr. Hummel, please see me on your way out." Professor List asked.

Kurt made his way to her desk at the front of the room as everyone else had filed out. "Professor List. Im sorry for not preparing."

She held a finger up to him, causing him to take a step back. "Please let me speak Mr. Hummel. Do you think I was rough on you today?" Kurt nodded his agreement. "Well, I was." She never looked up at him. She continued to put her books and notebooks away. "Ive heard about you Mr. Hummel. The buzz around your outfit in the fashion show a few days ago is the current gossip in the fashion world. The fact that it was made by a first year student before school even started is making its rounds."

"I didnt even know it was happening until I saw it."

"That may be, but I will tell you one thing. Youll need what I have to share with you. Youre going to need to learn how to speak with the fashion world if you expect to take it by surprise." Kurt thought that she was looking down to him and being really mean. "The only thing more boring than discussing how to create fashion is talking to someone that has no idea how make intelligent conversation. Thank you for staying after class. Ill see you on Wednesday.

She left Kurt standing there with a blank look on his face as the next class started to filter in. Whatever just happened, it wasnt good. Kurt knew that for sure. Kurt sighed and hoped his next class would go better than this. This is just what he worried about. Thankfully, none of his other professors seemed to be singling him out. He just couldnt figure it out. Why was she so mad at him? As Kurt looked back at his day, his drawing class stood out more than the others. It turns out that his talent is real. He enjoyed the class and Professor Lavelle was complimentary of his talent. After all, she was the one that got him the internship at Marc Jacobs.

Kurt sat staring at his coffee and spinning it circles while he thought about the days classes."Kurt?"

"Oh. Hi Caleb." Kurt was still cautious of Caleb after all of his ups and downs with him.

"You okay?" He asked with a true look of concern.

"Yeah. Im just thinking. I just got through my first day of school and I needed to relax with a cup of coffee. Im meeting Blaine here after school."

"Oh. Then Ill leave you." Caleb turned to leave.

Kurt sighed remembering what Blaine had said. He wanted to give Caleb a chance to be a better person. "Caleb. Youre welcome to sit." Kurt motioned to the chair across from him. "Blaine wont be here for another forty-five minutes."

"Thanks." Caleb took the seat across from him. "So why was your first day bad?"

"Did I say it was?" Kurt hated when people tried to read him

"No, but I can tell by the way you were staring at your cup and spinning it in circles. Thats a telltale sign that someone is thinking about something." Caleb someone understood people, yet when Kurt clearly showed his dislike of him, he never reacted.

"School was actually good except one class. I was just thinking about why the professor doesnt seem to like me."

"Thats easy. They dont have to. Theyre still going to get paid to teach you." Caleb was like a little kid with the right answer.

"Yeah, I get that, but everyone else was so much nicer. She singled out me and had me stay after class."

"That seems kind of wrong." Caleb offered. Well, no shit Sherlock. Why do you think Im baffled by all of this? Kurt thought in his head.

"Either way. Its about communication and writing. Ive always been good at those subjects in high school. Ill just have to win her over."

"I have no doubt that you can do it." Caleb glanced at his watch. "Well, I have to go. Its been nice talking to you again. I guess Blaine should be here to join you soon?"

"I hope its soon. Its supposed to be in about twenty minutes, but thats only if he gets out of class on time." Kurt paused. "Well, have a good night."

"Yeah. Ill see you later." Caleb walked away.

Kurt rubbed his head. What the hell? His teacher getting on his case, Caleb trying to be nice and conversational and Blaine wasnt here yet to help him think this through. If only Blaine was here, he could help Kurt make sense of his day. "So, do all gorgeous design students hang out here?"

Just the sight of Blaine cheerful face made Kurt smile. He smiled even wider after they had a proper kiss and Blaine put his cup down.