Chapter 65 - Decisions

Kurt was tied up to something, he didn't even know what it was, but Paul was there and he was talking. "What do you want?"

"You know what I want. I want what I didn't get the last time. I want what I started but never got to finish. I want to fuck you Kurt. I want you to scream my name and come for me, not that little fuck you call a boyfriend." Paul was originally far away but after Kurt blinked he was there right in front of him. His hands moved to his jeans as he pulled his belt off, unbuttoned and unzipped.

Kurt looked up and his hands were tied, they were handcuffed to something on the wall. He glanced behind him to see Paul lubing his cock. Kurt started to scream. "NO.. PLEASE, NO!"

Paul put his arms around Kurt's waist to hold him in place. Tears were streaming down Kurt's cheeks. He could barely breathe or think. He tried to move away, but he couldn't go anywhere. That's when he realized his ankles were shackled to the same wall. "Shut up and take it Kurt."

Paul pressed in with one jerk of his hips and Kurt keened at the intense pain he felt. He screamed shrill and high. "Oh my God.. no. no. no. no... Hurts! Stop!" Paul fucked him hard and with long strokes. Where was Blaine? Kurt cried. Blaine didn't save him.

"Where's your fucking boyfriend Kurt? He's useless. He can't even save you." Paul continued to pound him hard. "You're so fucking tight. You feel so good. Beg me for more Kurt. Beg me now and I'll fuck you harder."

"NO!" Kurt screamed. "NEVER!" Kurt fought his arousal because he couldn't control it. Paul kept hitting his prostate and he couldn't stop from getting semi-hard when his prostate was being stimulated over and over and over again.

Paul wrapped his arms completely around Kurt's waist. "It's okay."

"No it's not." Then a funny thing happened. His arms were suddenly free and he turned and punched Paul in the face. He kept punching, hitting Paul's jaw and his mouth."

"Kurt stop. Stop hitting. Please Kurt! Wake up!" It was Blaine.

Kurt's eyes shot open at the sound of Blaine's voice not, Paul's. Blaine was cradling his eye and his mouth. Kurt could see a tear drip from this other eye, probably from the pain Kurt just caused him. "Oh my God. Blaine. I'm sorry. Let me see it."

Kurt's insistent hands moved Blaine's away from his face so that he could survey the damage he caused. Blaine shook his head not wanting Kurt to see. He was sure that he had a split lip and his eye would probably swell. "I'm fine Kurt. Don't worry."

Kurt turned on the lamp and examined Blaine's face. His eyes welled up instantly and tears slowly trickled down his alabaster cheeks. "I hurt you. I'm sorry." Kurt felt like he kept hurting Blaine, hurting them. He needed to release himself of Paul, but wasn't sure he could. "I keep hurting you."

Blaine wiped Kurt's tears away, opting to focus attention on Kurt even though his lip was throbbing from the cut. Kurt was dealing with a lot right now. With Blaine, it was cut and dry. He didn't want Paul anywhere near them. He hurt Kurt, he cut Blaine and he didn't deserve to be enjoying himself every day. "You're hurting inside Kurt. It's coming out in your sleep, sweetheart. It's okay."

"No. I'm hurting you. Don't you think I know what's happening? Don't you think I know that at night you go in the bathroom to masturbate because I can't be intimate right now? I know it's hurting you. It's hurting us." Blaine hung his head because he really did feel a little guilt for taking care of himself and not being able to tell everything to Kurt.

"I thought you were asleep when I did that, but I did it because I didn't want you to have to worry about me in a time like this. I can't help it that I look at you and get excited. I know you're going through a lot and the last thing you should have to think about is me. It's not a big deal."

"I tried to sleep. I just couldn't. I'm sorry."

"For what Baby?"

"For not being there for you."

"Listen, right now, I need to you worry about you. I need you to focus on you. I'm not the one you should be worrying about. I want you to come to terms with all of this, in your own way."

"I'm sorry."

"Quit apologizing Kurt. We need to get through this, no matter how hard it is and how long it takes us."

"I'm broken Blaine." There it was. Kurt finally said it out loud. He admitted it to Blaine. "I thought I was over it. I thought I could handle it and I think it would've been okay if I never saw him again, but now, I don't know."

Blaine continued to hold his lip so that the bleeding would stop. "It's okay to care and it's okay to need help. We need to work on that."

"I think what's bothering me so much now is that I don't hate him. How is that possible? How could I not hate him after what he did to me and to you? He could have killed you Blaine, yet I'm sitting there asking questions while you and my dad are reacting probably the right way."

"I hate him Kurt, but that's me. You aren't me. You need to figure out what's going to make it okay for you in here." Blaine tapped Kurt on the forehead. "I love you, so I'll support you any way. I'll support you as long as you aren't suffering and right now, I fear you're suffering."

"I think you're the one that gets the worst of it. I punched you and split your lip. I think it's going to swell on the outer part of your eye, but it doesn't look terrible." Kurt traced the eye he hit. "You look good no matter what."

"Come here." Blaine let go of his lip and pulled Kurt into his arms and leaned back against the head board. "Do you want to talk to someone Kurt?"

"I don't know. I don't want to feel week."

"Oh Baby. Knowing that you need help is the strongest thing you could do. I would be with you the entire time. I'd be by your side if that's what you wanted. I just think, it might do you some good to talk to someone that can be objective about it."

Kurt sighed enjoying the feel of Blaine's arms around him. These were the ones he trusted with his life. "I'll think about it, okay?"

"Sure sweetheart. In the meantime, go back to sleep. We have school in the morning and glee practice. Sectionals is coming up." Blaine pulled Kurt down into the bed. "I love you Kurt. You know that right?'

"Yes. I love you too."

Kurt started to go through phases of sleeplessness and nightmares. Blaine held him tight every night while Kurt slept soundly until sometime in the middle of the night, he woke up screaming. It's about the fifth night in a row of dealing with it when he decided to call Burt. "Burt, can I call you this afternoon?"

"Sure. I'll be at the apartment around four thirty and then I'll be out to dinner. Is there something wrong?"

"I want to talk to you about Kurt, but I don't want to do it with him around."

"What's going on, Blaine? He's not dealing well, is he?"

"No he's not and we haven't heard anything from my dad since last week sometime. I'm afraid of a lot of things Burt and I just need some good advice." Burt could hear Blaine true concern and fear seeping through the phone.

"Do I need to come home?"

"No. Burt, I really want to handle this. We're getting married in five months and Kurt hasn't wanted to shop for our invitations yet. Just, can we talk later?" Blaine started to think of all the things they still needed to do for the wedding. They had the caterer, clothes, clothes for moms and flower's picked out, but they still needed invitations, seating and tables, linen, musicians and bridesmaid dresses. "Kurt's going shopping with Rachel and Mercedes. I told the girls to get him to bridal shop for the dresses to see if he comes around."

"Sure, Blaine. I'll talk to you around four thirty, okay?"

"He's having nightmares and he punched me a few nights ago." Blaine took a long pause hoping Burt would say something to relieve him from saying what he needed to say but no relief came. "I asked him if he wanted to talk to someone and he said he'd think about it. I really think he needs to talk to someone. He's been distant." Blaine wanted to explain to Burt that their sex life has become non-existent, but it just wouldn't be appropriate to say something to his soon to be husband's dad. That crossed that imaginary line of too much information.

"Maybe I should come home and we both just take him, kicking and screaming."

"He already feels like he's hurting me and our relationship. He's feeling guilt that really isn't his fault."

"Did your dad get more information?"

"He said it's taking longer than they thought it would. There's all this red tape and records being sealed and stuff that I'd rather not even think about." Blaine shook his head in frustration.

"I think I can help a little on this one. I'll call your dad tomorrow, okay?"

Blaine had just a glimmer of hope. "It would be great if you could get help.. from anyone Burt." Burt could hear the hope in Blaine's voice. Now he hoped he could come through for his sons.

"Are things okay between the two of you?"

"Um.. of course, yeah." Blaine didn't sound like he was telling the truth. "Things are fine. He just seems sad lately."

"Well, I mean. Are you guys the same as always?" Burt hated to ask the question but he knew it would give him a full picture of how bad his son was. "You know. Are you doing.. no, not. Geez this is hard to ask, but I feel like I need to. Are you two still intimate? That's the word." Blaine couldn't see it, but Burt was smiling at himself and blushed just a bit because he asked his future son-in-law if he was defiling his own son.

"Oh.. Um.. Kurt's been tired lately because he's not sleeping well." Blaine stumbled around the uncomfortable question and situation.

"Excuse me if I overstep my bounds, but you two are like a couple of rabbits, which would worry me to no end if you guys could get pregnant, but seeing as... um.. Not sure where I was going with that. Anyway, your relationship has changed, so I think you should make an appointment for him. Just do it and I'll talk to him. Okay Blaine?" Burt was firm with his order and Blaine remembered how scary Burt could be sometimes.

"Yes Burt. I'll call someone. Promise."

Blaine and Kurt were doing homework one evening just a few nights later when an unexpected knock came at the door. Blaine stood up first, giving Kurt a squeeze on his knee. Kurt smiled back. He was slowly making progress even though Blaine had yet to get him to a doctor. Kurt had resumed some kissing and hugging with Blaine and was starting to come back to him. Blaine turned back to Kurt before opening the door. Kurt smiled and Blaine opened the door. "Dad?" Blaine was shocked and Kurt stood from the couch where he was sitting. "What brings you here tonight? I didn't even know you'd be here. Come in."

"Hi son. Well I'm here about Paul." JR and Blaine looked at Kurt to see what his reaction was. Kurt was shocked but appeared to want more. "Let's sit because I have a lot to talk about."

"It's not good is it?" Blaine said hesitantly.

"No. No. Don't worry. Let's not focus on good or bad. Let's focus on the information, shall we?" Blain just nodded and ushered his dad into the living room to sit in the chair opposite them on the couch. JR unloaded everything from his briefcase. "I just wanted to talk to you guys in person so we can make some immediate decisions."

Kurt looked at Blaine with a worried look, but it was Blaine who spoke. "Can you handle this Baby?"

"Yeah. I think so. I need to learn to deal with it right?" Blaine answered with a chaste kiss to Kurt's lips. "So, let's hear it JR."

"Okay. I think we knew that if anything was going to be done with him, we knew it would be on our side. Italy confirmed they don't have manpower nor the time to deal with an international issue." JR scanned the document. "We can, if you want, bring to light with the Department of Homeland Security that his passport is fake. We were able to track down the person hired to create the passport."

"Department of Homeland Security?" Kurt asked. "Why them?"

"They are over immigration and customs and have a whole separate unit of people who deal with foreigners that are here only to study." JR had learned a lot of this just today. "They can pick him up as soon as they confirm our findings.

"Then let's do that." Blaine immediately said.

"There's another option. We can wait until he gets picked up for violating the restraining order and he'll be in prison here. Then we can charge him and deport him for fake credentials."

Kurt was so confused. "What's the difference then? Either way, we get him."

"The second way is better because he can never come back here once we turn him over to France." JR stopped and waited for a response.

Blaine was silent as Kurt processed the information. "I don't want to go to New York while he's there, so he won't be able to violate the restraining order. If we get him the other way, what are his chances of coming back?"

JR stared at Kurt. "We don't know. We won't know until we charge him."

"Well then, I want to think about it JR. Can we talk it over tonight and Blaine can call you in the morning?"

"Sure Kurt. You need to do what's right for you, okay?" JR stood and moved over to the couch where he pulled Kurt into a hug. "It needs to be right for both of you, Kurt. I know that whatever you do, I'll support you in any way I can. I love both of you and we'll do what we need to do."

"Stay for dinner? Kurt made some Corn chowder and salad and we warmed up a loaf of bread."

"I will son. Thanks."

"I think we go ahead and do the other way. The Homeland Security thing." Kurt whispered as Blaine held him in his arms that night. "I want to get on with our future Blaine and I feel like we've been stuck for three weeks."

"I don't care about anything but you Kurt. Our future will always be there." Blaine rubbed circles into Kurt's side.

"I need closure with this. I need it for me and I need it for us." Kurt was being strong. Blaine always knew he was strong, but he realized in that moment that Kurt was brave as well. He was facing his demons. "I want to talk to him too."

Blaine was completely caught off guard with the last statement. "Baby, that's probably not a good thing."

"Maybe not, but I think I need to see him. I need to actually talk to him to see if he still looks crazy. I want to look into his eyes and see if there is any remorse." Kurt hugged Blaine just a bit tighter. "I need this to move forward, Blaine. Will you support me?"

"Of course I will. I'll be right there with you. I'll hold your hand tight the whole time."

"Thank you Blaine. I know the last few weeks have been so hard on you. I feel like this is the right thing to do."

"I love you Kurt. I would stay by you for a lifetime. You're my perfect match. Don't you already know that?"

Kurt smiled wide and Blaine could feel it on his chest where Kurt's head lay. He also felt the tension in Kurt drift away slowly as his breathing evened out. It was then that Blaine let his eyes close and sleep take him in. That was the first night in weeks that Kurt slept soundly without his nightmares to keep him up.