Blaine can't stop thinking about last night. He can't seem to forget how wonderful and perfect everything felt when his body was lightly pressed against Kurt's. Maybe it was a stupid, bold move, but he had a legitimate excuse to snuggle close to this beautiful boy. Blaine believes body heat is an excellent way to stay warm.

Blaine feels guilty. Kurt knows nothing about his past. At least the things that really matter. He doesn't know about Jeremiah and he doesn't know about Blaine's feelings when it comes to girls and how he just doesn't find them sexually appealing. At all. He doesn't want to confuse Kurt, but he also doesn't want Kurt to think that he's been purposefully keeping information from him. Blaine hates secrets. He has his father to thank for that. Because Blaine was the family's best kept secret. He thought that by now he would have broken out of that stupid shell. Let himself date boys. But he's let himself become so accustomed to lying to himself that he has trouble breaking out of that nasty habit. He's afraid of letting his family down. He's afraid of being some big, stupid disappointment that nobody wants to talk about.

But, Kurt…

Kurt is so wonderful. He's so proud of being who he is. He's so brave and he really doesn't care what people think. And Kurt makes Blaine want to not care either. Because Blaine wants Kurt. But he can't say it. His mouth can't form those words. His voice can't force out the phrase, "I really like you more than I probably should." So, instead of saying it, Blaine tends to show it thorough little touches and bright smiles. He grabs Kurt's arm and squeezes it gently when they're talking. He lets his eyes linger on Kurt's a little longer than necessary.

And most importantly, he asks Kurt out on a date.

"There's this Christmas carnival in town for a few weeks. I was wondering if you'd like to come with me tonight? I know you've said that you don't really like carnivals, but maybe you'll like this one. There's a bunch of lights and really nice Christmas decorations." Blaine asks over lunch. Kurt looks up from his salad, blue eyes practically sparkling and he nods. "That sounds like fun."

Blaine grins and laughs. He half expected Kurt to decline. He doesn't seem to be the type to enjoy carnivals, but what the hell. He said yes and, really, that's all that matters. "It will be," Blaine promises before taking a bite out of his pizza.

o~o~o

The night starts off great. Kurt lends Blaine one of his scarves because, of course, Blaine has lost the only one he owns. Blaine manages to keep the small smile from his face when he notices that the scarf smells like Kurt.

The carnival isn't crowded when they arrive which Blaine takes as a good sign. He kind of wants tonight to be perfect because, in his head, this is a date. Even though he and Kurt are technically friends. Friends who share a bed and snuggle for warmth.

The first thing that catches their attention is a pen decorated with ornaments and lights. Inside there are eight caribou, the fence decorated with eight different names: Santa's reindeer. Blaine's eyes linger on the animals for a few moments until Kurt speaks up.

"I can't help but feel bad for them," he mutters.

Blaine turns his head to look over at Kurt who is watching the caribou as they move around the all too small enclosure. "I hope they're treated well, at least." Kurt pauses for a moment, laughing softly as he closes his eyes. "I blame Rachel," he sighs. "My best friend is a vegan and such a softie when it comes to animals. I guess she's rubbed off on me a little."

Blaine can't take his eyes off of Kurt as he talks. He watches him quietly, heart swelling. He bites his lip, smiling softly. "It's sweet," Blaine finally says to which Kurt quickly turns his head to look at Blaine. Kurt's smile is a little sheepish as he looks back at the pen as one of the caribou approaches them, sniffing the air hesitantly. Kurt reaches out to it as they both watch the animal quietly as it warily sniffs Kurt's hand then licks it. Kurt quickly pulls it back, laughing a little and wiping it against his coat.

As they continue wandering the carnival, Blaine's eyes remain on Kurt. He smiles at the way the Christmas lights make Kurt's blue eyes sparkle and his skin practically glow. Kurt's one of the most beautiful things he's ever seen. Blaine's stomach swoops as the thought crosses his mind. Blaine has never felt this way about a girl or even a boy. It's like Kurt is on a completely different level.

"So, do you have any limits when it comes to carnival rides?" Blaine asks.

"I won't go on anything that goes upside down," Kurt says immediately.

Blaine sticks out his lower lip in a mock pout. "Not even if I offer to buy you a gazillion donuts?"

"Those things are a heart attack in a cheap paper bag, Blaine. No."

"…Caramel apple?"

"Messy."

Blaine stops to think for a moment. Then, his face lights up. "Free coffee for the next month," he says with a triumphant grin.

At this, Kurt pauses and actually thinks about it. Blaine raises both eyebrows expectantly. "You know it's an excellent bargain. Four minutes on a ride on exchange for four weeks of delicious, free coffee."

Kurt is about to say something. He takes a breath but freezes when suddenly a young boy is coughing, then retching at Kurt's feet. Blaine's eyes go wide with shock as terror floods Kurt's face. He says nothing and remains completely still as the child stumbles away, crying for his mother.

"Oh, my god," Blaine breathes.

Blaine convinces Kurt that he doesn't mind helping him clean off his boots. It isn't that bad and Blaine feels like its partly his fault. He was the one that suggested they come to this crappy carnival. He knew it wasn't something Kurt would normally do, but he still insisted they come and promised Kurt he would have fun.

Blaine was so very wrong.

Once Kurt's shoes are successfully cleaned and Blaine has covered his hands in hand sanitizer he slowly wanders over to the bench where Kurt is, avoiding eye contact. He takes a seat silently beside Kurt and there is an awkward silence lingering between them for a few seconds.

"I'm so sorry," Blaine blurts out, looking at the ground.

"For the fifth time, it's fine," he hears Kurt say beside him but Blaine refuses to believe him. Kurt is so particular about his clothes and he mentioned earlier on in the night that those boots were new.

Blaine doesn't want to spend the night sulking because this night is supposed to be perfect—or at least close to it. So, Blaine lets a wide smile pull at his lips as he stands. "So how about that ride, huh?" he offers.

o~o~o

The ride of their choosing turns out to be another disaster much to Blaine's horror. For some terrible, stupid reason the damn thing decides to malfunction, causing the boys to remain stuck in their seats, harnesses snug with their backs pressed uncomfortably against the seats. Blaine bites his lips as he drops his head against the headrest, eyes squeezing shut. Curse words are swirling around his head and it is incredibly difficult not to open his mouth and let those words free.

Twenty minutes later, the mechanics fix the problem and everyone is free from their seats. Blaine resists the urge to hang his head in shame as they step off into the grass. "We should probably go," Blaine says.

"What?" Kurt asks over the screaming from some of the other carnival rides.

"I said we should go," Blaine calls over his shoulder only to stumble into the woman walking in front of him, causing him to nearly lose his balance. The woman tosses Blaine a dirty look before continuing on.

Blaine sort of hates everything right now.

o~o~o

Stepping through the door behind Kurt, Blaine tugs off the scarf Kurt has lent him for the night and sets it on Kurt's dresser. He peels off his coat and hangs it over his chair. They haven't exchanged many words since they left the carnival. Blaine is, to say the least, freaking out. He's terrified of what Kurt thinks about him now and even more afraid of getting an earful from a very dissatisfied Kurt in just a few minutes. He's afraid of listening to him tell Blaine that the Christmas carnival was an awful and stupid idea. That he had a terrible time and that—

"I had fun tonight."

Blaine stops in his tracks and he looks at Kurt. "What?" he asks after a beat. "But that was—it was a disaster. Everything that could have gone wrong went wrong," Blaine blurts out.

Kurt shrugs. "Yeah, some kid threw up on my shoes and we got stuck on a crappy carnival ride, but I still had fun. It was nice spending the night with you," he says as he sits down on the edge of his bed and begins to tug off his boots.

Blaine has to keep himself from staring at Kurt, mouth hanging open because, really, he definitely was not expecting to hear that. He feels a sense of relief suddenly wash over him and he's almost sure his shoulders visibly become a little more relaxed. "I'm glad you had a good time," Blaine says finally with a gentle smile.

o~o~o

"Alright. Next. Steve Madden or Sperry Top Sider."

"Oh, man, Top Sider, all the way."

"I knew you'd say that," Kurt smiles triumphantly as he leans back in his seat, sipping his coffee.

"And why's that?" Blaine asks as he takes a small drink of his own.

Kurt arches a brow at him as he leans to the side dramatically to peer down at Blaine's shoes. "Do I really need to say it? You have an addiction to those shoes, Blaine."

"I do not," Blaine says, scrunching up his face.

Kurt sits back up. "You keep telling yourself that," he says with a shrug as he takes another drink. "This is delicious, by the way," he adds. "Especially since it's free." He smirks.

Blaine bites back a small laugh.

It's been a week since their disastrous date, as Blaine likes to call it. Not a romantic date, though, he reminds himself. Just a friendly one. Because he and Kurt are just friends, despite the fact that Blaine want to kiss Kurt every time he sees him. He has no idea what he's doing though. He doesn't know his way around boys, let alone Kurt. He's so different from the girls that Blaine has dated. All two of them.

Sometimes Blaine feels like he's in high school all over again when he's with Kurt. He gets butterflies in his stomach when Kurt's hand accidentally brushes his. Blaine's cheeks feel a little warm he reaches out to touch Kurt's arm when he makes one of his hilarious, witty comments.

They're in Kurt's car about to pull out of the parking lot when Kurt suddenly stops to look at Blaine.

"Okay, can I ask you something, um…personal?"

Blaine's eyes go to Kurt and suddenly, he feels really warm. "Um, sure."

"Are you…straight?" Kurt briefly looks down at the steering wheel before turning his gaze back up to Blaine. "I mean—" he stutters, "I know you said you had a girlfriend and all, but—I'm not trying to assume anything, but—" he pauses, breathing out slowly, as if he's gathering his thoughts and putting them into a complete, coherent sentence. "To put it simply, my gaydar is sort of going crazy, no offense."

Blaine's heart is at his throat and it's beating uncontrollably. He's almost sure that he's blushing and he really, really hopes Kurt doesn't notice. "None taken," Blaine says, laughing a little at how blunt Kurt can be sometimes. It's one of the reasons he likes him so much. Blaine takes a deep breath and sighs. "To be completely honest, I don't think so."

Kurt blinks and gives a small, slow nod. "So you're…bi-sexual?" he asks, saying the word like it burns on his tongue.

"Again…I don't think so…" Blaine chews on his lip. He's almost sure his heart is about to give out from how fast it's beating. He's never talked about this to anyone, ever. "I don't really know anymore."

Kurt is looking at him a little wide eyed. There's a bit of shock in his face as his eyebrows rise. A little smile tugs at the corner of his lips.

Blaine's staring right back. "Why are you smiling?"

Kurt pauses before quietly adding, "I knew it."

Then, there is another short silence before Blaine snorts and begins laughing. Kurt bursts out in laughter and they lean against one another, gasping and giggling uncontrollably.