For so long he had tried to blend in, go unnoticed. But now he was District 12’s male tribute. Everybody would be watching him. They’d see how reluctantly he would try to survive. Maybe then they’d realise, Blaine thought bitterly.

He’d contemplated actually making an effort, but the thought that it would be futile didn’t encourage him. Nobody really cared. His parents probably wouldn’t even watch the Games, lest they be embarrassed with how terribly he went.

Blaine scuffed one of his shoes as he stared out over the District square. He could vaguely make out Cooper, standing off to the side with their parents.
They wouldn’t miss him.

The next thing he knew, Santana was approaching him, her hand outstretched. He took it firmly, shaking it as they both smiled nervously out over the square.

Santana seemed to be making a valiant effort to hold herself together. Blaine couldn’t judge her, so many of the past female tributes who had broken down on the stage, regardless of district, often did poorly when it came to gaining sponsors. They needed to be stoic.

Blaine would learn in time that Santana was, like him, superb at wearing a mask.

The pair were led to the Justice Building, and directed to individual rooms. Blaine slumped against the wall, not even walking as far as the comfy looking chair. He was beyond caring.

He knew nobody would come through the door, until he was taken to go to the Capitol. Despite all the little fantasies he had of his parents coming to farewell him, weeping over the son they had never taken the time to love, Blaine couldn’t help but feel his heartbreak with the realisation that it wouldn’t happen. He’d had no doubt that would be the case, but it didn’t stop his heart sinking that little bit further in his chest.

He wondered if they would regret it, when they saw their son’s slaughter being broadcast to all of Panem. Blaine snorted at the thought of his family actually watching the Games at all. They’d probably stop whenever Blaine was on the screen.

He stared around the room slightly bewildered, as everything began to sink in.

“I’m actually a tribute,” he murmured, stomach fluttering. It all seemed so surreal. After watching the Hunger Games for countless years, he was now to take part. To try and survive.

Survival meant nothing to Blaine when he had no desire to return to District 12, regardless of wealth. He would still be an outcast, just progressing up the social ladder to be someone everybody pretended to like for their own personal gain.

Blaine was sick of feeling less than human, and if he had to die as a tribute to end that particular sense of being, then he was all for it.

There was a gentle rap on the door and Blaine glanced up. Surely visiting rights weren’t over yet, Blaine thought to himself, it had only been a few minutes since he was brought into the room.

The massive door lurched open and Blaine could have sworn time stopped. There stood Cooper, hair dishevelled and eyes overly bright.

“What do you want?” Blaine snapped, surprising even himself with his disposition.

“I... Blaine...” Cooper’s voice caught, and he swallowed, glancing nervously across to where his younger brother sat, glaring up at him.

“I know it’s a really stupid time, and I’m completely ridiculous for thinking this might change things, but I wanted to come by and tell you how sorry I am. For all the times I made you feel like you weren’t good enough. Like you were less than a human being. You’re my brother, and I was just trying to do what I thought was right.”
“Don’t give me that crap, Coop.” Blaine muttered, turning away to stare out the window.

“No, seriously. Dad was always there telling me how to be, how to think and I never questioned it. When you... when you told me you were gay, I didn’t know what to do! I still wanted to think of you as my amazing little brother, but Dad would’ve killed me if he knew I was okay with you being the way you were... the way you are. I was terrified of him. I still am. But I don’t want you going out there with nothing to live for, Blaine. You need to survive.”

Blaine smiled weakly at his brother, “Thanks Coop, but this probably wasn’t the best time to have that speech. Even if you do care about me now, nobody else does. There’s nothing worth living for. I just want to get out of this place and never have to return.”

Cooper nodded sadly, “I knew it was a terrible idea to try and talk to you when it was too late. I guess I just needed to give it a go, even just for myself. I’m so sorry, Blaine. Please, just... God, I can’t even think properly, I’ve been such a horrible person. Please be brave. Blaine, you’re such a strong person, don’t let them change you.”

Blaine’s eyes widened, taken aback with how emotional Cooper was making him and he swallowed as he glanced up at how conflicted his usually staunch older brother seemed.
“I will Coop.”

The door burst open and Fiona Reading strolled in, flanked by two guards.

“Okay Mister Anderson, it’s time for us to head off to the Capitol.”

Cooper helped Blaine up off the floor, pulling him in for a brief, albeit awkward embrace.

“Remember, be brave. And I’m honestly so sorry.”
Blaine locked his hazel eyes with Cooper’s bright blue, betraying no emotion whatsoever.

“I’m sorry too. Bye.”

Cooper’s eyes welled up, and he rubbed the tears away furiously. If his father knew he was saying goodbye to Blaine, he’d be disowned, and a part of him could have cared less.

Even though he’d been horrible to him, Cooper still saw Blaine as his baby brother. He felt awful that he’d listened to his father for so many important years of Blaine’s life.

As Cooper made his way out of the building, his mind flooded with ‘what ifs.’ What if he’d been more accepting? What if he hadn’t violated Blaine’s privacy? Kept his brother’s sexuality private? Would their father have been more accepting? What if he had paid more attention to Blaine when he had clearly been troubled for so long? What if Blaine’s name hadn’t been pulled out? Would he have killed himself rather than continue to live in District 12?

What concerned Cooper the most was that he couldn’t think of an answer for that. He felt like Blaine was almost a stranger to him, and he was fairly certain that feeling was reciprocated.

Cooper walked out of the room as slowly as he could, trying to take in the most of the last sight of his brother as he was able before Cooper was led through the back doors and out into the empty District 12 square.
He didn’t care what his parents said or did, Blaine was his brother, and he would support him; regardless of whether Blaine wanted that support or not.

Blaine was led out to a hallway, where he could hear muffled sobs and a soothing voice from the room Santana was in. Sure enough, the dark haired girl emerged a few moments later, face streaked with tears as a tall blonde girl was led out of the building.

Blaine glanced across at Santana, “Hey,” he murmured softly, taking her hand softly.

She looked heartbroken.

Blaine knew the feeling too well.

“Someone special?” He whispered, rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand lightly. He’d often seen Santana with the blonde haired girl, Brittany, he thought her name was. They were essentially inseparable, and Blaine wouldn’t have been surprised if it was something more than friendship.

Santana eyed him warily, “We’re just friends.” She said almost forcefully, the crack in her voice preceding another sob.

Blaine gazed at her, concern etched on his features as he nodded gently, knowing this wasn’t the full truth, but that he was essentially a complete stranger and she probably didn’t want to share her personal life.

“Okay, cool. Just letting you know, in case you have problems with it or whatever, I... I’m gay. If you don’t want to train with me that’s fine and I get it... I’ve spent most of my life avoiding people anyway so...”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Santana retorted, “You’re being so kind to me when we may have to have to kill each other in less than a month. You’re a great guy Blaine, and I’d love to train with you. Besides, maybe we’d make good allies.”
Blaine nodded, smiling faintly. Maybe. If he actually had any desire to live.

Fiona Reading strode back into the hallway where Blaine and Santana sat leaning against the wall.

“Let’s go to the Capitol!” She exclaimed, smiling at them in a manner Blaine supposed was meant to be supportive. Her offensively white teeth and manic eyes scared him.
He felt Santana grip his hand tightly as they followed Fiona out of the building.

And so it would all begin.

Two weeks of training and Blaine had absolutely no idea what he could have to defend himself in terms of skill. He didn’t know what to expect. He knew there was training, and he knew that he would be thrust into an unfamiliar environment, but he didn’t know who he was up against, or how quickly he could expect to die.

He couldn’t help but wonder how he’d be feeling if he hadn’t been disowned by his family. Would he care about survival then?

Blaine couldn’t imagine he would. Sure, an accepting family would be wonderful, but District 12 had nothing to offer in terms of what meant the most to him in his life.

Love.

Blaine knew it seemed naive, and for so long he’d thought it was stupid, but he’d come to realise he didn’t have much else to offer the world. He’d decided that since he had no visible talents that maybe he just had to find someone who could bring out the best in him.

Finding someone to love, and who would love him in return was a rather difficult task, however, considering he was the only boy in the district who openly identified as being gay. He figured any others would be too terrified in such a place as District 12.

Not everybody had a problem with homosexuality, but there was a general closed-mindedness about the district that left acceptance as something to be much desired.
His secret had only become known after he’d told Cooper.

Cooper.

Blaine’s heart twisted as he glanced out the carriage window, having one last glimpse of District 12.

He knew Cooper was trying to make amends for how he had treated Blaine in the past, but it hadn’t had much of an effect. For all Blaine had experienced, Cooper would probably end up going back to being as ambivalent as he had been before if Blaine returned as a champion.

He didn’t see the point in trying when it was a complete lose-lose situation.