Part 2 - Kaleidoscopic Universal Responsive Traveler

“If one shall dream with touching the stars, one shall wake up and touch them…”

—Sandra Guzman

***

Shadows all around you as you surface from the dark. Emerging from the gentle grip of night’s unfolding arms. Darkness, darkness everywhere. Do you feel alone? The subtle grace of gravity, the heavy weight of stone?

***

Blaine trembled, a cold sweat breaking out all over his body. He bit his lip as tears pricked in his eyes, but he kept them firmly shut.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

“Oh god please help,” he whimpered, shaking violently in his suit. “Help me, please!”

Tap.

Tap.

He hyperventilated slightly before taking in a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves. He licked his lips as his eyelids slowly cracked open.

Two large opally-blue green eyes stared back at him.

Blaine screamed.

And screamed.

And screamed.

It had been over a year. Blaine hadn’t had an emotional, physical, sexual, or psychological connection with anyone in all of that time. It didn’t take a lot for that last little piece to break and for him to fall over the edge and let terror take hold.  

It went on for nearly two hours. He stared into the large staring eyes and screamed until his voice gave out and he heaved in breaths, his throat feeling like glass shards had been raked through it. He wanted to grab his hair in frustration or cover his eyes, but he couldn’t touch himself and his body hadn’t moved, paralyzed in fear.

He breathed heavily, sobbing quietly as he tried to look anywhere except those large marble eyes staring at him. He could feel himself slipping under as he blinked back tears, looking beyond the eyes for the first time to the stark, swirly multicolored light around them. 

The entity he’d been chasing earlier.

Blaine sniffed, leaning his head against the side of his helmet and accidentally hitting his head against his transmitter.

“Oh,” he murmured, trying to hang onto a shred of sanity. “There you are. I’ve been looking for you forever.”

And then he fell unconscious. 

***

Hours later Blaine woke again and had the good sense to keep his eyes closed.

He was calmer now. Still terrified, but he could think at least a little more rationally. And a couple things occurred to him.

The first being that sound didn’t travel in space so the entity probably hadn’t heard his break in sanity earlier. 

And the second…was that he still had his visor down on his helmet. So the entity wasn’t looking at him. It was looking at its reflection. 

Which gave Blaine a slight advantage as well as the element of surprise.

But he was still disadvantaged because he didn’t know anything about the entity or what it was capable of. All he knew was what it looked like and that it was extremely fast. 

Blaine took a deep breath and opened his eyes.

The same swirly eyes stared back at him. He focused all his attention into not freaking out and steadily observed the entity in front of him. 

It was around his size, though it was hard to tell with the close proximity. It had two eyes about three centimeters in diameter and a…vaguely humanoid shape that was translucent in appearance, reminiscent of blown glass. And it was surrounded in this…multicolored light and energy that sort of trailed behind it. It was almost like a person had run into a large piece of cloth and then kept running—the outline of the person was still there, but the cloth trailed behind it slightly in the wind.

That was what the entity looked like—an oddly glassy figure with large opalesque eyes that had run through a rainbow of energy and light. 

It was almost eerie in how inhuman it looked, despite a relatively similar shape. But it was just so…alien and completely different from anything that Blaine had ever seen. 

Blaine blinked a couple of times as his heart rate gradually slowed back to normal as he observed the entity as calmly as possible. 

It was very still—its eyes swirled chaotically and the light moved around it but it stayed oddly in place. For the first time in months, Blaine’s lips quirked into an almost-smile as he realized that it was probably transfixed with its own reflection. 

Maybe there was a human quality in it after all. 

Blaine licked his lips lightly, his pulse quickening again as he threw caution to the wind. “Raise visor,” he said quietly.

His visor slowly raised, letting more light into his suit and he saw that the entity was much more vibrant than he’d priorly anticipated, all sea greens and lilacs and soft pinks and rich turquoises and vivid violets and soft silvers and iridescent glasz and—

The entity’s eyes went white as the visor raised all the way and in the blink of an eye it was a hundred feet back, hovering uncertainly in the void.

Blaine blinked in surprise at the sudden space between them. He was almost relieved now at the lack of their proximity except…no. He was relieved.

***

A week passed.

***

And another.

***

And then a month.

***

I think I’m drowning. Asphyxiated. I want to break the spell that you’ve created. You’re something beautiful. A contradiction. I want to play the game. I want the friction.

***

Blaine blinked his eyes open and immediately sought out the entity. It was still there, roughly one hundred feet away. They both just floated in place, the only apparent alive entities in the Pollux Quadrant. 

Blaine kept staring. After over a month of ignoring it and trying to pretend that it didn’t exist, he was done. He was interested. He had a responsive form of life within eyesight, not to mention a connection to another being that he’d severely been lacking for over a year and life was too short to even care about what would happen to him considering that he was on borrowed time. In all likelihood, he was going to die in the Pollux Quadrant, in just a matter of months.

And, to be quite honest, he was obsessed with the entity. It was strange and interesting and unlike  anything he’d ever seen before. He wanted to know where it came from. What it was doing. Why it was still near him. He’d even given it a name—the Kaleidoscopic Universal Traveler.

He wasn’t going to spend his last days in the universe studiously ignoring the entity. He’d become an astronaut to explore strange new worlds and seek out new life forms and new civilizations and to boldly go where no one had gone before.

And here he was. The first human to ever make contact with an extraterrestrial being. What this whole mission had been about. He was the first.

Blaine held out his hand.

***

Take a look and we’ll see into your imagination.

***

It took four hours. 

Blaine’s arm ached and he was dozing off. But then he felt a firm pressure on his hand. His eyes flew open. 

The entity was there. Its form had grown more humanoid since Blaine had last seen it and he could distinguish arms and legs and something resembling a head. There was a soft cerulean glow where their hands were clasped together and it was like a nerve in the back of Blaine’s neck suddenly snapped. He jumped slightly, his hand coming back and then he was consumed with fear.

Raging, uncontrollable fear.

Suddenly it was one hundred feet away again but Blaine still felt crippling fear overtaking him and his breath came up short. He was just so terrified that—

Wait.

Why was he terrified?

Blaine blinked, absolute fear still running through him but it seemed…odd somehow. Different. He looked across the void to the entity, who was still keeping its distance.

Cautiously, Blaine lifted his hand again.

He waited. 

The fear in his chest remained, but then curiosity joined in.

The entity started approaching him slowly, and Blaine felt trepidation as well.

It reached out a hand to Blaine’s and the odd blue glow came back again. Blaine blinked as the fear and trepidation vanished and suddenly he felt warm and fuzzy and bright. He looked over at it and smiled slightly, giving its hand a light squeeze. 

And then suddenly the entity was right next to his helmet, peering in. And Blaine didn’t feel afraid this time, he just felt curious and oddly happy. It was jarring because it didn’t even feel like his…own…

A thought occurred to him. Maybe he wasn’t…maybe these were…the entity’s emotions? But that would be impossi—

Suddenly a bright warm feeling filled Blaine and the word “yes” popped into his mind and he felt slightly ticklish.

Blaine blinked, staring at the entity who shimmered brightly for a moment as well. “So…” Blaine cleared his throat. “These are your…emotions?”

The same warm bright feeling filled him again. Yes. 

Blaine gazed at the entity who was rippling and undulating slightly, seeming to almost…wriggle. “So,” he cleared his throat. “I…um. Hi. My name’s Blaine—I mean, I’m Science Officer Blaine Anderson of the Star Ship Theseus.”

A warm and spicy feeling filled him, the smell of pumpkin pie filling his nostrils and coffee on the tip of his tongue and crisp leaves underfoot and he felt oddly scarlet and gold. 

“I…” Blaine blinked. “What was that?”

The feeling filled him again and he got the impression of Blaine. 

“That…was me?”

The warm light feeling. Yes.

“Oh,” Blaine nodded. “Okay. Do…do you have a name? Or others like you? Or…anything?”

Silence on the emotional scale. And then a faint impression of sadness.

“Well,” Blaine said gently. “I came up with a name for you if…if that’s okay.”

Curiosity. 

“It’s the Kaleidoscopic Universal Traveler. Though you are communicative, so that should be accounted for…how about the Kaleidoscopic Universal Responsive Traveler?”

An odd feeling. Like wrinkling his nose.

“Yeah,” Blaine laughed. “It’s kind of a mouthful. We could shorten it…how about KURT?”

Yes. Then another feeling cropped up, one of pale blue green and lilac flowers and silk and smooth sea glass and cheesecake. 

Blaine smiled as it washed over him. “Was that you?”

KURT.

Blaine nodded. “It’s a nice feeling. You feel nice. I mean, well, you um…I—”

Bubbly gold and pineapple upside down cake.

“No need to laugh at me,” Blaine scoffed. “And I—wait, how are you even hearing me? Sound doesn’t travel through space.”

A flare of light went through his mind.

“Mentally?” Blaine raised an eyebrow. “So…we have a psychic link?”

Yes.

“Wow,” Blaine said quietly. “That’s…new.”

The warm crisp feeling. Blaine.

“So…you don’t have language. I mean, spoken language. You just communicate through emotions and feelings on a psychic scale.”

Yes.

“Okay…” Blaine said quietly. “So like…” He thought of home and the first time he saw the stars up close and the giddy feeling in his stomach when he’d receive a bow tie for his birthday. “…that?”

KURT wriggled and sent a bubbly giggle emotion to Blaine. 

Blaine found himself laughing along. 

***

These fishes in the sea, they’re staring at me.

***

Blaine was drifting with the tide, further and further down, still yet to reach the bottom. The unfathomable dark pressed in against his glass but he waited, patient. A streak of light swirled the water around him and he smiled, waiting for the creature to approach. 

It did, slowly, it’s sleek bioluminescent body swaying slightly as it swam to Blaine. The merman. Kurt, as he’d taken to calling him. 

He swam right up to Blaine, his glowing blue eyes smiling and his thick chestnut hair drifting in the deep current. He circled Blaine curiously before nudging his webbed fingers into Blaine’s holding hands with him. There wasn’t anything Blaine wanted to do more in that moment than to take off his suit and feel Kurt’s skin against his, but the pressure of the water would kill him sooner then the lack of oxygen would.

It was something so simple. The touch of fingertips. The one thing Blaine was craving more and more right now. But he—

***

I hold you near. You’re the only song I want to hear. A melody softly soaring through my atmosphere. 

***

Blaine’s eyes blinked open and there was KURT, hovering predictably outside his suit, waiting for him to wake up. “Don’t you have anywhere else to go while I’m asleep?”

A sharp zing went through him which, after five weeks, Blaine had worked out to mean a scoff. 

“Of course,” Blaine nodded. “There’s nothing prettier in the Pollux Quadrant than me.”

KURT had figured out how to rearrange Blaine’s emotions to make it feel like a smack on his shoulder. Like right now.

“Alright alright!” Blaine laughed. “Enough silliness.”

The line of KURT’s mouth pulled up slightly. He—after the third week, Blaine found himself thinking of KURT as a male, supposedly an attempt at humanizing him—had started to attempt human replies: Facial quirks and slight mental impressions as opposed to the barrage of emotions he usually received. 

KURT had also continued to become gradually more humanoid in form, seemingly to mimic Blaine’s structure—though how he’d managed to guess what Blaine looked like under his suit, Blaine had yet to discover—until he now had feet, a distinct torso, a clear neck, ears, something akin to hair, and—as of today—fingers. 

“So, more stories of Earth? Or the S.S. Theseus?”

KURT shuddered. 

Blaine sighed. KURT always had this reaction to the star ship. He seemed irrationally terrified of it, no matter how many times he tried to tell KURT it was a good ship, full of good people. 

But it wasn’t a day—night?—for arguments. He held up the white flag. “Or we could listen to more music—” A very emphatic nudge. “Okay, okay, more music. Here, I think you’ll like this one…”

Blaine licked his lips as the song started playing and relaxed against the material of his suit, letting the overly-familiar song fill his head. He’d listened to this song—to ever song in his suit—literally thousands of times, but each new song that KURT heard and reacted to was a new mystery to be uncovered. 

Words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup. They slither while they pass, they slip away across the universe… Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my open mind, possessing and caressing me…

Blaine smiled as KURT kept flashing different colorful emotions at him in delight.

Images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes, they call me on and on across the universe… Thoughts meander like a restless wind inside a letterbox. They tumble blindly as they make their way across the universe… 

Blaine blinked as he felt fingers steadily thread through his gloved ones, a familiar blue light springing up, but this time it was tinged violet. He glanced up at KURT in surprise, but KURT just raised the line of his mouth in an attempt at a smile and Blaine smiled back. 

Sounds of laughter shades of life are ringing through my open ears exciting and inviting me. Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns and calls me on and on across the universe…

KURT wriggled and sent a light giggle to Blaine who laughed softly back as the music washed over them.

***

Nothing’s gonna change my world… Nothing’s gonna change my world…

***

Blaine awoke to Kurt tapping on his shield, glowing beautifully around him. He took one of Blaine’s hands and suddenly he was pulling him through the currents. Blaine found himself distracted by Kurt’s swishing silver tail that reflected the various bursts of light that Kurt gave off like a kaleidoscope. 

A fish swam by them, swirling with bioluminescent light.

Then another.

And another.

Until they reached a giant school of fish. No, multiple schools. Thousands, maybe millions of fish swirled around in a rainbow display, flashing their colors. Churning and flickering and—

***

Look at the stars. Look how they shine for you.

***

Blaine opened his eyes as he felt himself being tugged along. He smiled when he saw KURT’s hand gripping his forearm. “Where are we going now?”

Blaine, shhh.

Two weeks ago, KURT had started to drag him physically through space, careful to keep at a slow pace otherwise Blaine’s suit would eventually capsize under the pressure, and show him various stars and galaxies in the Pollux Quadrant. 

And four days after that, KURT had surprised Blaine by speaking a word into his head.

Blaine.

Blaine had let go of KURT’s hand mid-flight in surprise which had ended up being bad because he’d ended up getting stuck in the gravitational pull of a solar system that they’d been passing and KURT had to drag him out of it. 

Now, Blaine was used to the odd high voice filtering into his head and KURT had learned to grab Blaine’s arm and not let go. 

Blaine kept quiet and watched the stars streak by as KURT brought them on the outskirts of a star cluster, surrounded by waves upon waves of dust that had been colored and streaked across the black of space in a dazzling display of vivid light. Blaine’s breath caught at the beauty of it. The indescribable size. The sharpness of the colors. How it almost hurt his eyes to look at.

My favorite, KURT said, lacing his fingers with Blaine, who’d learned that it was KURT’s favorite gesture. 

“I can see why,” Blaine whispered. As if his voice would shatter the brilliance in front of him. “It’s beautiful.”

Yes. KURT sent the emotion instead of saying it and Blaine responded back emotionally as well as he could.

He failed to notice that KURT had been looking at him the whole time, not the star cluster. 

***

If you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it.

***

Who’s Chandler?

Blaine nearly choked on his recycled air. “What? I—how did you know that name?”

KURT curled up in a mimicry of sitting cross-legged. I…I’ve been using your memories to learn to communicate and I noticed that you’ve used him a lot in your dislike-emotions.

Blaine sighed. Nearly three months later and KURT basically had modern conversational English down. It had come at a cost, however. Their psychic link—after thoroughly examining Blaine’s knowledge of the word psychic, KURT had determined that it was indeed the correct word for their link—had grown stronger seemingly and KURT had voraciously fired through Blaine’s mind and memories in an attempt to communicate better. And he’d discovered some…not-so-easy-to-explain things (the talk about masturbation had been particularly awkward). 

I’m sorry, KURT said quietly. I was just curious. 

“Yeah, I’ve noticed,” Blaine sighed. “Chandler…um, he used to be my best friend. Like, for years. We went through academy together. And, after I graduated, I went on my first assignment into space. It was short and simple, just a loop around the solar system. And there was this…guy I was dating at the time, Sebastian. We’d met in our linguistics class my last year of academy and we started dating—

Dating?

“Uh…” KURT always had questions about the romantic aspects of human life. “It’s when two people like each other more than friends and want to be together.”

Oh. Okay.

“Yeah so, I was dating Sebastian and Chandler was great about the whole thing, really supportive and they got along too, which was nice. So…I got back from my assignment and went over to Chandler’s to tell him all about it, like I’d promised and he was…with Sebastian.”

With Sebastian?

Blaine grimaced and shot KURT a mental image. It was easier than explaining. 

Oh! Oh. Wow. That’s…I’m sorry, Blaine. 

“It’s alright, KURT. It’s not like it’s your fault or anything.”

But he was your… Blaine winced as he felt a nudge in his mind which meant that KURT was sifting through it for a word. …your soulmate, right?

“What?” Blaine laughed. “Sebastian? No. No way.”

But… KURT’s mouth pulled down into a frown. Aren’t you supposed to find your soulmate and then date them and marry them and be happy?

“Uh…” Blaine blinked. He hadn’t realized how seriously KURT had taken his long and drawn-out explanation of marriage. “I mean, you can date other people beforehand.”

But why would you want to when you have your soulmate to look forward to? And why would Sebastian be with other people if he was still looking for his soulmate?

“Because life is a bit more complicated then that, KURT,” Blaine sighed. 

Wait! What if Sebastian realized that Chandler was his soulmate and that he was wrong for choosing you!

It was times like these that Blaine had to remind himself that KURT was an extraterrestrial life form and not a human and also they were in space so Blaine could really punch him out of aggravation. 

Also, he’d never punch KURT, no matter what he did.

But he didn’t want to think about that right now.

“I don’t think it’s like that, KURT,” Blaine said evenly. “I’m pretty sure that Sebastian’s moved on to someone else by now.”

Oh. KURT attempted to wrinkle his nose. I don’t like him them.

“The feelings mutual.”

It literally was. The dislike emanating through the two of them was shared and they basked in it for a while. 

Blaine, do you know who your soulmate is?

“No,” Blaine admitted. “But I’m sure he’s out there somewhere.”

Okay.

Then KURT sent another emotion, one that was a vivid purple that reminded him of sitting in coffee shops and bow ties and touch and the words “excuse me”.

“What was that?” he murmured to KURT.

Nothing.

***

I want to live where soul meets body and let the sun wrap its arms around me and bath my skin in water cool and cleansing and feel what it’s like to be me…

***

Blaine smiled as a finger tapped his shoulder and he turned sluggishly in the water, his smile widening when he saw Kurt there. 

Kurt smiled back and wrapped his arms around Blaine shoulders, leaning in at the same time as Blaine, both of them pressing their lips against the glass of Blaine’s helmet—

***

You don’t see what you possess: A beauty calm and clear. It floods the sky and blows the darkness, like a chandelier. 

***

Blaine.

Blaine jerked awake when KURT said his name. “What?”

I… KURT suddenly turned, slightly bashful. I was in your dream.

“In my—what?”

I…I’ve always been in them, KURT said quietly. At first I didn’t realize it, I just thought you were thinking weird, but then I kept showing up and you kept saying my name so I started pushing myself into them harder and I’m really pretty the way you imagine me even though I don’t look anything like that really—

“You’re beautiful.”

KURT startled back a couple of inches, surprise openly radiating from him.What?

“You’re beautiful,” Blaine said again, blinking sleep out of his eyes. “You’re actually one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen in my entire life and my dreams definitely don’t compare to what you really look like.” 

I— KURT wriggled slightly. Thank you.

Blaine didn’t know what had come over him, but suddenly the words were just rolling off his tongue. “You’re amazing and gorgeous and unlike anything I’ve ever seen before and—and there’s another story I want to tell you.”

Another myth?

“Yes.”

Cupid and Psyche?

“No, KURT. I’ve told that one nearly a thousand times by now.”

Well it’s my favorite. So, Castor and Pollux again? Oh god, not Theseus.

(KURT was still very against anything that had to do with Blaine’s old star ship)

“No, a different one. Selena. She was the goddess of the moon—”

A moon? KURT wrinkled his nose. A lump of rock?

“It wasn’t just a lump of rock back then. It was a source of light at night, a beacon of hope, a splash of the sun in a dark world. And she was one of the most beautiful goddesses around. Not in an obvious fashion—”

Like Hera and Aphrodite and Athena who made Paris decide?

“No,” Blaine agreed, shaking his head. “Not like that. But she was beautiful because of what she contributed rather than just looks. And…that’s how I see you.”

Really?

“Yes. KURT, I was just drifting through space and on my last rope of sanity. And then…there you were. When I needed you most.”

Silence prevailed, both mentally, vocally, and emotionally.

Blaine?

“Yes?”

Did Selena have a soulmate?

“Well, she did have a famous lover. Endymion.”

Wasn’t that the name of your ship?

“Yes.” Blaine smiled wryly, remembering the small pod before it had malfunctioned. 

What did Endymion do?

“He was an astronomer. And Selena would watch over him while he slept. She fell in love with him and he chose to sleep forever so he could always be with her.”

Blaine, what are you—

“I want to sleep here forever, KURT. I want to keep dreaming with you.”

KURT didn’t say anything, but that purple emotion he was so fond of flooded over Blaine in droves.

Blaine?

“Yes?”

Can we…try the thing in your dream?

“Of course.”

KURT leaned in at the same time as Blaine and their lips pressed gently against the smooth clear surface of Blaine’s helmet.

Violet consumed them. 

***

Look at the skies they have stars in their eyes on this lovely belle notte. Side by side with your loved on, you’ll find enchantment here. The night will weave its magic spell when the one you love is near. Oh this is the night and the heavens are right on this lovely bella notte. 

***

All good things had to come to an end.

It was Day 600.

Blaine’s suit began to fail.

Blaine!

KURT was vibrating around him, trying to snap him out of it as Blaine’s body grew more and more lethargic. 

Blaine, please!

“KURT,” Blaine slurred. “It’s alright, just—”

H went in and out of consciousness. KURT—no, Kurt—flew—no, swam—what?

Snap out of it!

***

It started with a lowlight. Next thing I knew they ripped me from my bed.

***

There was a sharp mental smack and Blaine’s eyes flew open. He gasped in pain as KURT tore through his mind, searching for information.

Come on come on come on come on

Blaine’s eyes grew heavy. “It’s okay, KURT. I’m just going to…sleep…forever…”

Blaine don’t you dare!

***

And then they took my blood type. They left a strange impression in my head.

***

Suddenly KURT had him in a vice grip and they were speeding through the stars. Blaine’s eyes fluttered as tendrils of KURT’s light and trails of stars imprinted onto his eyelids and dazzled him briefly.

Then he recognized a star cluster.

And another.

And a host of them.

They were back in the Castor Quadrant.

***

You know that I was hoping that I could lead this star-crossed world behind. But then they cut me open. I guess that changed my mind.

***

There, KURT breathed and Blaine realized what KURT had been digging in his head for.

The location of the S.S. Theseus. 

“KURT, you won’t make—” Blaine cut off as his tongue grew heavy. The oxygen was shutting down. He couldn’t breath. 

Blaine Blaine Blaine Blaine Blaine Blaine Blaine Blaine Blaine!

***

And you know I might just float to far from the floor this time ‘cause they’re calling me by my name…

***

KURT, you won’t make it, Blaine tried mentally. His lungs were no use now.There are defenses—

They smacked head-on into the shield.

Also Blaine saw missiles heading in their direction out of the corner of his eye. KURT, run…

No! I’m not leaving you!

KURT latched an arm around his waist and they shot up around the shield. KURT turned them every which way to dodge the missiles and suddenly he shot a hand into the shield, physically tearing a hole into it so they could squeeze through. The shield snapped shut behind them and the missiles exploded against it. KURT flew them, at breakneck speed, towards the bridge. 

***

And the zipping white light beams disregarding bombs and satellites. That was a turning point. That was one lonely night…

***

Blaine’s eyes closed and he slipped into unconsciousness, KURT’s voice screaming through his head.

KURT flew them until they landed smack on the viewscreen of the bridge, for all the commanding officers of the S.S. Theseus to see.

***

The starmaker says it ain’t so bad. The dreammaker’s gonna make you mad. The spaceman says “Everybody look down. It’s all in your mind.”

***