June 11, 2012, 7:53 p.m.
As You Wish: The Betrayal
M - Words: 6,430 - Last Updated: Jun 11, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 11/? - Created: Oct 30, 2011 - Updated: Jun 11, 2012 179 0 0 0 0
"Oh, so, so much, Mercedes. So much." Kurt sighed, and closed his eyes for a moment, before Mercedes could ask what was going on. "Just drama with Jeff. And Blaine. And me. Ugh, I don't know what to do right now."
She looked concerned. "Jeff? And Blaine? What the hell, Kurt, what happened?"
"I kind of hurt Jeff. Physically, I mean. And maybe emotionally. Yeah, probably that one, too."
"Physically? Seriously, Kurt? What did he do, steal your moisturizer?" She started to laugh until she saw his face.
"I shoved him, Mercedes. Kind of hard, too. He already got hurt at rehearsal, and then I pushed him, so he fell and hit his head again." He felt guilt rise up in his throat like bile.
"Whoa. What did he do?"
"Huh?" he asked.
"What did he do to make you push him? I know you, Kurt, you don't get physically violent, ever. He must have done something to provoke you."
He paused, not sure if he should tell her anything else. "'Cedes, if I tell you something, you have to keep it between just you and me, okay?"
She nodded.
"I'm serious. You told everybody about Puck and Quinn and Beth, but you better not tell anybody anything. Your inability to keep your mouth shut is not something I need right now."
"Okay, Kurt. I swear I won't say anything." She held up her hands in the Girl Scout sign.
Kurt took a breath. "We were kissing, and he pushed me against the door. It was a little hard, but I overreacted and pushed him as hard as I could. He went backwards and hit his head."
Mercedes' jaw dropped. "Well, that's an overreaction if I've ever heard of one! Damn, boy! He was kissing you and you pushed him? What the hell was goin' on in that hair-sprayed head of yours?"
"I'm not done!" Kurt raised his voice a little. Luckily, Nick was in the common room downstairs; Kurt wouldn't have had a Skype conversation if he was there.
"What's your explanation, then? There better be one, 'cause pushing your first and only boyfriend? That ain't cool."
"God, Mercedes. Chill. Just wait." He rolled his eyes at her. "When we were making out, it sort of… triggered something." He went quiet, suddenly afraid to continue. What if she judged him? What if she got mad at him for not saying something sooner, or thought he was overreacting again?
"Triggered what? Tell me, Kurt." She sounded a little more than frustrated with him.
"I tell you this, you keep your mouth shut. Do you understand me?" he saw her nod, then continued. "Okay. You know why I left McKinley, right?"
"Yeah, Karofsky said he'd kill you if you told anyone he'd been harassing you. And?"
"That's not exactly why I left. I mean, yeah, he threatened my life, but not for that." He saw her open her mouth to talk, but kept going before she could say anything. "He threatened to kill me if I told anyone what he really did to me. Mercedes, he… he kissed me." He watched her face on his computer screen, waiting for the yells, the 'what the hell', the threats. None of it came; she just sat there, her eyes wide and sad and confused all at the same time. "'Cedes?" he asked tentatively.
She lifted up a hand and looked away for a moment. When she turned back to the screen, her voice was just above a whisper. "…What happened?"
"I followed him into the locker room after he threw me into a wall. I got so angry, Mercedes, I didn't know what else to do. And Blaine said that I should confront him, and I did, and it backfired and he kissed me." He rambled.
"Kurt, why didn't you tell anyone?" she asked, her voice still quiet.
"The jock who's made my life a living hell since the first day of freshman year kisses me and I'm going to go tell everyone? Yeah, right. Are you insane? He threatened to kill me after that, if I told anyone. I value my life, Mercedes. I don't want to throw it away because some closeted homophobic jock wants to take out his repressed sexuality on me." He snapped at her.
"Kurt, I'm so sorry." Her eyes looked sad, and he could tell she meant it. "I can't believe he would do that to you. So, does that mean he's-"
"Gay? Yeah. Completely explains everything, if you think about it." He shrugged.
"Have you told anyone else about this?" she asked.
"I told Blaine. I actually called him right after it happened. I had to find my phone first, since Karofsky knocked it out of my hand, but-"
"Wait, what? You called Blaine right after? Why couldn't you tell me, or Finn, or any of us?" she seemed ticked off.
"I called Blaine because he's the only one who would understand. And before you say anything, " he saw her open her mouth, "he gets it because he's gay. And he's been through crap before, okay? I mean, you've been slushied, but you've never dealt with dumpsters or locker slams or anything else like that. He has."
"You barely knew him back then. Aren't I your best friend? Why couldn't you say something to me?" she was hurt, and he hated it.
"I couldn't say anything to you because you'd go to Finn, okay?" he raised his voice again. "And then Finn would go after Karofsky, and he would know that I said something, and he'd come after me!" he was shaking a little as he finished, but he knew he got his point across; Mercedes looked like she regretted saying anything. "He'd come after me, and I'd get hurt. You don't know what he's capable of, Mercedes. He really would do something, and I'll be damned if I would let it happen."
"Okay." She said, quiet again.
"Okay?" he asked, unsure of what was going on.
"Okay, I get it. I understand. I still wish you had told me, but I get why you went to him." She smiled a little. "Now tell me what this has to do with Blaine and Jeff now."
.....
Kurt was standing in the shower, letting the Fekkai conditioner soak in his hair. He didn't feel much better about the situation at hand; he had told Mercedes almost everything, except for the almost-kiss the day of the movie marathon. She had kept mostly silent, nodding and shaking her head when appropriate, but she did say one thing that stuck on his mind after he told her he still had feelings for Blaine: If you like him, you like him. You can't make that go away. You just need to figure out if losing your relationship with Jeff is worth gaining one with Blaine.
That was it, right there. He knew that both Jeff and Blaine had feelings for him, but he wasn't sure if he could leave the comfort of his relationship with Jeff for the uncertainty of a relationship with Blaine. Still, he couldn't deny that he still felt really, really strongly toward him. If only Blaine had figured out his feelings before…
.....
Mercedes was sitting on her bed, absentmindedly doodling on the margins of her math homework. She felt guilty, and she knew she deserved it. Quinn had called shortly after her Skype conversation with Kurt, and she couldn't help it; she told her about Karofsky kissing him. Kurt was right, she couldn't keep her mouth shut. She only hoped nothing would happen because of her.
.....
Jeff moved the ice pack from the back of his head to the front, ignoring the little stab of pain when he moved his head too quickly. He had visited the nurse again that day, after the pseudo-fight with Blaine, and was pleased that he still didn't have a concussion. His right hand hurt a little; he didn't realize Blaine's jaw was that solid. He felt guilty but justified in his actions; his boyfriend had been sleeping with the guy who had a crush on him, didn't he have the right to get pissed?
"Dude, you look like crap." Eric noted as he walked into their room and dropped his bag on the floor.
"Shut up." He rolled over a little on his bed, facing away from Eric.
"You need to talk to Kurt. Rehearsal was insanely awkward today, and I don't want to deal with that tomorrow." He sat down to take off his shoes.
"He doesn't want to talk to me. Messaged me during first period, said he needed a few days to think. He's pissed at me for this morning." He said.
"I don't blame him." Eric ignored the glare from Jeff. "You started wailing on Blaine, who didn't even try to protect himself. You didn't ask Kurt what was going on in private before you took your anger out on them, and I'm actually kind of surprised that Kurt didn't break up with you right then and there."
Jeff's eyes widened, and he sat up (a little too quickly, he got dizzy). "You don't think he's actually going to-"
"I don't know, man. But you have got to figure out what you're going to do." Eric got up from his bed and grabbed some workout clothes from his dresser, and went into the bathroom. "I'm going to go for a run." He said when he came back out. "I'll see you in a little bit."
Jeff just sat there and watched Eric leave, the idea of Kurt breaking up with him floating in his head like a little pipe bomb, ready to explode and hurt him. Kurt wouldn't really break up with him, would he? He knew he had screwed up; he shouldn't have attacked Blaine, or jumped to conclusions. But he knew how Blaine felt, and knew that Kurt had felt that way at some point, too. Seeing them that morning, with their legs intertwined, holding each other's hands… The way Kurt curved in toward Blaine, almost like he was seeking him out in his sleep. He couldn't shake the feeling that he wasn't enough for Kurt, that he was just a replacement until Blaine had realized what he wanted.
"Ugh!" he groaned, even more pissed off than he had been before. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down. It didn't really work, since images of Blaine and Kurt tangled together on the couch came flooding into his mind. Kurt's back had been facing him, and he could see where his shirt had ridden up to show the slight dimple above his right hip. Their legs were crossed, one on top of the other, and Jeff could see where their hands joined, touching both of their chests. Their heads were even tilted toward each other, and if they had moved just an inch or two closer… He didn't want to think about it anymore. He needed to just call Kurt and tell him how he felt about this, and find out what he wanted. Yeah. He was going to get this figured out. He grabbed his phone from his backpack and found Kurt's phone number. He was about to press 'send' when a new message flashed across the screen.
Jeff, it's Simon. Dad left Mom, told her it wasn't fair to keep me in the closet to get into congress. Please call me, I need you right now. – Si
Simon. His ex-boyfriend, the one he hadn't heard from (even though he was still a Dalton student) since they broke up. He couldn't bail on him now, not when he was actually needed. He'd call Kurt later.
.....
Blaine: so how are you?
Mia: I'm fine, I guess. Tired, but doing okay.
Blaine: did they get it all?
Mia: They think they did.
Blaine: what all did they do?
Mia: Well, they went in and took out my left ovary, and the fallopian tube that was attached. The tumor was small, really small, but it was on both.
Blaine: :(
Mia: I should be fine, don't worry. The doctors said I could still probably have kids, if everything turns out to be fine after chemo and everything.
Blaine: Good. I need nieces and nephews, and I don't want to wait for Jamie.
Mia: You could always just go have kids of your own, you know. Obviously not right now, you're in high school and not sleeping with girls (I hope), but later on, yeah.
Blaine: Ew. Just… ew.
Mia: :D
Blaine: how's Paul?
Mia: He's doing okay. He's more stressed than I am, lol. I keep telling him to go hang out with his friends, or go do something. There's not much I can do here in the hospital, and I'm here for at least a few more days.
Blaine: I doubt he'd be able to go do anything without feeling guilty for leaving you alone there, even though you're telling him to.
Mia: yeah, yeah. I know. I just hate seeing him like this, he feels so helpless, and there's nothing I can do.
Blaine: he probably feels the same.
Mia: Ture.
Mia: True*
Mia: Sorry, I'm a little out of it right now. They've got me so pumped full of drugs right now… whoo. I haven't felt this high since that party I threw junior year. ;)
Blaine: Wow…
Mia: Hey, that party rocked. I don't remember much of it but still. Rocked.
Blaine: I'm so glad we were all out of town when that happened. You got in so much trouble. That's why I would never throw a party like that.
Mia: I was grounded for the rest of that school year. And that was a homecoming party! Ugh. That year sucked. At least your junior year seems better than mine.
Blaine: eh. I'm just happy it's almost over.
Mia: ?
Blaine: don't wanna talk about it.
Mia: tell me.
Mia: tell me. TELL ME TELL ME TELL ME TELL ME
Blaine: holy cow, fine.
Mia: you know you love me.
Blaine: uh huh.
Mia: Are you going to tell me or do I have to call you?
Blaine: please don't. you're not allowed to be on your cell in a hospital, anyway.
Mia: then start typing, little brother.
Blaine: Ugh. Fine. I kind of got my ass kicked a little today.
Mia: …
Blaine: by Jeff. Kurt's boyfriend.
Mia: OOOOOH! (you okay?) OOOOOH!
Blaine: you're such a brat sometimes.
Mia: Me? I'm innocent. But seriously, you okay?
Blaine: yeah, just a swollen jaw and a bit of a pain in my side. He punched me in the stomach and kicked me in the side, too.
Mia: did you hit him back?
Blaine: no. I didn't want to fight in front of Kurt, he doesn't do well with violence.
Mia: but it was okay for Jeff ot hit you?
Mia: to*
Blaine: no. But I still wasn't going to fight in front of him, he already didn't like what was going on.
Mia: why did he attack you?
Blaine: don't freak.
Mia: I won't.
Blaine: promise.
Mia: I promise.
Blaine: … I sort of slept with Kurt last night.
Mia: ….. o.O
Mia: did you at least use protection?
Blaine: NO! Not like that! Oh, god. No, no, not like that at all. We fell asleep on the couch together, we didn't… no.
Mia: I wondered.
Mia: but you want to do that with him, right?
Blaine: I'm getting offline now. Love you.
Mia: BUT YOU WAAAAAANT KURT, DON'T YOU? IF YOU WERE A GIRL YOU'D HAVE HIS BAAAAABBBBIIIIIEEEEEESSS!
Blaine has logged off
Mia: hehe.
.....
"Dude."
"I know."
"Dude." David repeated.
"Yup." Wes sat next to David on his bed. David's roommate was gone, so Wes thought now was a good time to fill in his friend. Jeff attacking Blaine that morning made things a little more real to him, and he had realized just how much could go wrong now.
"Wow." David's eyes were wide. "You're not just shitting me, are you?"
"Uh, no." Wes rolled his eyes. "You can't tell anyone."
"Uh huh." David nodded.
"I'm serious. Don't say anything to anyone."
"I won't, Wes. I know how pissed off Jeff would be if he knew, so I'll keep quiet." David wasn't surprised that Blaine and Kurt had almost kissed; the unresolved sexual tension between them was so thick you could cut it with a knife, but he was surprised that it took so long.
"What do you think is going to happen?" Wes asked quietly.
"No idea. But I think it's safe to say that someone's going to get hurt."
.....
Jeff
pros
- sweet
- blonde
- gorgeous eyes
- nice body
- funny
- not afraid of PDA
- likes me
- nice voice
- great kisser
- decent movie taste
- kick ass car/knows cars
- same height as me
cons
- seems to have hormones on overdrive (maybe a pro?)
- doesn't like Blaine
- gets jealous easily
- doesn't know what the real world is like (sheltered)
Blaine
pros
- smart
- funny
- shorter than me
- amazing singing voice
- knows my coffee order
- there for me at the beginning
- knows my family
- gets along with Finn (how?)
- Dad likes him
- tries to include me with his friends
- adorable hair (w/out gel)
- can always make me smile
- knows all the great Disney songs
- can play guitar
- can play piano
- loves Broadway as much as I do
- never dated anyone
- good cuddler
cons
- took him forever to tell me he liked me
- always thinks he's right
- likes football
- is obsessed with Katy Perry
- can be snobby
......
That Tuesday had been exhausting for everyone, especially rehearsal. Kurt had gone straight from Warbler's Hall to his dorm, and when Nick had gone up a few hours later, Kurt was already passed out on his bed.
Nick knew he shouldn't have looked at Kurt's notebook. He had fallen asleep with a pencil in his hand and a small Moleskine notebook open on his lap, and he was just being a good roommate and putting it away so he could sleep. He couldn't help but look though, when he saw Jeff's name at the top of the page. It was obviously a pros and cons list, probably to help Kurt figure out what he wanted. Nick noticed that it seemed like Blaine had a lot more pros than Jeff, though. He smiled, and knew what he could do.
.....
"Morning, Blaine." Nick walked up to him outside his pre-calc classroom. He had to be on the other side of the building for his first period French class, but he needed to talk to Blaine.
"Hey, what's up?" Blaine looked a little confused. "Don't you have French with Kurt first hour? Like, on the other side of the building?"
"Yeah, but I have time. Listen, there's something I think you need to know."
"What's that?" he was a little wary; he knew that Nick's best friend was Eric, who was Jeff's roommate. He really hoped Jeff wasn't planning on beating him up, because his jaw was just starting to feel normal again.
"I think you have a real shot with Kurt." Nick blurted out.
Blaine just stared at him.
"Hear me out, okay? This isn't some sort of trick or anything, I'm being serious. I can't tell you exactly how I know, but I do. I don't know if you can do anything to make Kurt choose you, but I think you have a chance to be with him."
"How on earth do you know this?" Blaine asked. "And how do I really know you're not just screwing with me?" the last thing he needed was a mind game.
"Because Kurt is my roommate, and I'm looking out for him on this. I know he likes you, he still does, and I think you might be able to make him happier than Jeff. Don't say anything to anyone, but, yeah." Nick looked around, hoping no one had heard him.
"Nick?" Blaine asked.
"Yeah?"
"Go to class." Blaine didn't sound angry, just tired.
"Okay. But think about what I said, okay? Don't talk to Jeff, and don't go straight to Kurt. Wait for him. You know how he is, I imagine he'll say something to you soon enough." Nick smiled, then turned around and started to jog down the hall.
"Alright, then." Blaine shook his head and walked into the classroom, thinking about what Nick had just told him. It didn't really make any sense, and he was rambling a bit, but from what Blaine could tell, it looked like maybe Kurt still had feelings for him. Maybe there was hope for him after all.
.....
"Where were you?" Kurt hissed at Nick as he came running into the classroom. Class had just started, and their teacher was handing out study guides for the test in two days.
"Sorry, I had to talk to Eric." He whispered after he sat down in the chair behind Kurt.
Kurt rolled his eyes. "You two are attached at the damn hip, I swear. You're worse than David and Wes."
"Monsieur Hummel, quiet please." Madame Moreau scolded him. "And Monsieur Lane, you are not to be late again. Understood?"
"Understood, Madame." Nick said quietly. She allowed them to break into partners to do the study guides, and told them they would spend that day and Thursday working on them in preparation for the test. As usual, Nick and Kurt pulled their desks together to work.
"So, you doing okay?" Nick asked.
Kurt raised an eyebrow, then rolled his eyes. "I'm fine, Nick. Can we focus on conjugating verbs, please?"
"Yeah, yeah. I just, I wanted to make sure you were doing okay. If you need to talk or anything, you can talk to me." He kept his voice low.
Kurt looked over at his roommate, and saw the concern on his face. "I know, Nick. Thank you." He smiled, then started on their first question.
.....
"You did better tonight, guys. Much better." Thad smiled after Thursday's rehearsal. "Eric, can you ask Jeff if he can stay later tomorrow to go over his part?" Eric nodded. "Tell him we missed him today." Jeff had skipped rehearsal, telling Thad he felt sick.
Everyone filed out into the hall, Kurt pointedly ignoring Blaine when he tried to get his attention and walk with him. He knew he should probably talk to him, but he really didn't want to right then. He needed to talk to Jeff first, and hopefully figure out what to do. He heard Wes and David call Blaine, and was grateful that he didn't follow.
He walked a little faster than he usually did; he wanted to get to Jeff's room before Eric, so he could have the chance to talk to him in private. Soon enough, he was standing outside Jeff's door. He was about to knock when he noticed the door wasn't shut all the way.
"Simon, you know I'm with Kurt." He heard Jeff's voice coming from inside the room. Was he on the phone? Kurt just stood there, not sure if he should go in or not.
"I know, Jeff, but how long have you been with him? A month? A month and a half? You guys haven't been together that long, and you're already fighting." Kurt heard a voice he didn't recognize.
"I care about him."
"Do you love him?" the other one asked.
"Simon…"
"Do you love him? Because I know you loved me." Wait. Simon? As in Jeff's ex, Simon? Kurt felt his stomach drop, and leaned in closer to listen.
"I don't know yet. I really care about him, though." Jeff sounded a little hesitant. Did he really care about him that much, or was Kurt reading too much into it?
"Jeff, I know you. I know how you are. I know that this thing with you and Kurt and Blaine is getting to you. I know you're not sure if you love him, but here's another question. Does he love you?" Did he? True, Kurt wasn't too educated about what 'love' was; he thought he had been in love with Finn Hudson, for Gaga's sake.
"I don't know." Kurt heard Jeff answer.
"Have you asked him?"
"No, Simon, I haven't. How the hell do you expect me to ask that, especially now?" Jeff sounded angry.
"You need to ask him, and yes, especially now. You said it yourself, Blaine likes him. Blaine likes him a lot, and unless you do something, he'll choose Blaine."
"I want to be with him." Kurt smiled.
"But I want to be with you." The smile faded fast.
"Si, I don't-"
"Shut up. We were each other's everything. I loved you. You loved me. Dammit, Jeff, we need to talk about this before Kurt makes a decision."
Kurt backed away from the door, not wanting to hear anything else. The Simon that was inside the room had to be Jeff's ex-boyfriend. Jeff had told him about their relationship; about what they were like. Kurt knew that they had lost their virginities to each other, and he knew that was a big deal. He didn't know if that bond was still there, and he was a little afraid to find out. Kurt was so focused on getting to his room and finding a pillow to cry into when he slammed into something solid and warm.
"Kurt?" Blaine asked, alarmed at the look in the taller boy's eyes. "Kurt, look at me." He grabbed his arms, trying to make him pay attention.
"I gotta go, Blaine. I'm sorry." Kurt shook himself free from Blaine's grasp and stumbled the few doors down to his room.
Blaine watched him go, confused as ever. What was wrong now? He was sure he saw tears in his eyes, and it looked like he had come from Jeff's room. Blaine was worried now, had Jeff broken up with Kurt? What had he said to hurt him? He made a decision; he was going to deal with Jeff. No one hurt Kurt and got away with it.
He got to Jeff's door and was about to barge in when he heard a familiar voice, Simon Clark.
"I miss you."
"Si, I can't do this right now." Jeff sounded stressed.
"Screw Hummel! Screw him, Jeff, this isn't about him at all. This is about you, and me, and what we had. What we could have again!"
"I'm not going to break up with him just to see what could happen with us! You decided to listen to your mother and go back in the damn closet, pretend you were straight. Kurt's not like that, okay? He's not ashamed to be seen with me. He's not ashamed to hold my hand or kiss me in front of other people." Jeff was almost yelling.
"I was never ashamed!" Simon shouted. Blaine moved a little farther away from the door; he didn't want to get caught. "That was all my mom, Jeff. My fucking mom." He heard Simon take a deep breath. "She threatened to pull me out of Dalton if I didn't do what she wanted. She was going to take away everything I had. I would have done anything to just be with you, but she would have taken me out of Dalton and moved me to some boarding school in some other country, and I'd rather be here and fake being straight and get to see you every day than go somewhere else and never see you again." Blaine shook his head. Simon and Jeff dated? When? And since when was Simon gay? Blaine's gaydar had gone off around him before, but Simon always had a girlfriend. Well, his mother was an extremely conservative congresswoman, but-
"You never even talk to me." Jeff sounded hurt.
"I couldn't. It was too hard. Every time I saw you, I wanted to touch you, kiss you, just be with you. It would have been so much worse if I had actually talked to you."
Blaine couldn't listen to anything else. He turned around and made his way to Kurt's room. He had to be there for Kurt right now, as a friend. He must have heard Simon and Jeff talking, and that's why he had ran off.
He knocked on Kurt's door, then waited for a response.
"Come in." he stepped inside. "Blaine, what-"
"Are you okay?" Blaine shut the door behind him and walked over to the boy curled up on his bed.
"What are you doing here? I thought I asked you to leave me alone?" Kurt was obviously upset, and it looked like Blaine wasn't making anything better.
"Something's wrong, and you're crying. Did you expect me to leave you alone?" Blaine walked over to Kurt's bed and sat down next to him. "If you want me to go, I will, but I know you heard something in Jeff's room."
"How did you-" Kurt sat up a little.
"I heard them talking. They weren't exactly quiet." Blaine sighed, pleased that Kurt hadn't kicked him out yet. "What did you hear?" he asked.
"I heard Jeff. And his ex-boyfriend." Blaine was surprised, Simon and Jeff really had dated. "I think Simon still likes him. He was asking Jeff if he loved me, and…" he trailed off, getting a little uncomfortable. "I shouldn't be talking to you about this. You are the last person I should be talking to about this." He looked away from Blaine.
"I heard them, too. I listened to them after you left." Blaine admitted, feeling a little guilty.
"What? What did you hear?" Kurt turned back, suddenly interested.
"Do you really want me to tell you that, Kurt? Maybe you should go straight to Jeff and find out from him before you talk to me."
"No, tell me. I'll go to him later, but I want to hear what you heard. You won't lie to me." Blaine raised his eyebrows. "Not that Jeff would, but he might not tell me everything." Kurt explained hurriedly.
"You'll talk to him? After I tell you?" Blaine wanted to make sure Kurt would hear what Jeff had to say; he may want Kurt for himself, but he wanted Kurt happy more than that. If Kurt made his decision based on what Blaine told him, and Blaine didn't have all the facts, it could make everyone's life a living hell.
"Yes, I'll talk to him. Now tell me what you heard." Kurt sat up and crossed his legs under him, wanting to hear everything.
"Okay, Kurt. But then you have to talk to Jeff, because I can't give you any more information than a conversation I heard." Kurt nodded eagerly, desperate for Blaine to start talking.
.....
Kurt didn't know what to think. Blaine had just told him everything he heard Jeff and Simon say, and he even admitted that he had no idea that they had even dated. As far as anyone knew, the black-haired senior was straight.
"Kurt, you okay? You kinda zoned out for a minute there." Blaine waved his hand in front of his face, trying to get his attention.
"I'm fine. I just… I really think I should go talk to him now. I don't want him to think I'm going to break up with him or anything, I just needed time to think." Blaine felt a slight stab in his stomach. He wasn't going to break up with Jeff, he just needed time to deal with his jealousy.
"Yeah, yeah, you should talk to him. I'll walk you down there, I've got to go to my room and do homework anyway." Blaine put on his fake, dapper smile and stood up.
Kurt got up, too, and smoothed his blazer. "Thank you, Blaine. For telling me what you heard." He moved to reach his hand out and touch Blaine's shoulder, but thought better of it. "Let's go." His smile matched Blaine's.
The two boys left Kurt's room, shutting the door lightly behind them. They walked down the hall silently, keeping a careful distance, until they came to Jeff's room. Kurt was trying to quell the nervous feeling in his stomach, not made any better by the tension between he and Blaine.
"I'll see you later, Kurt." Blaine said quietly, his eyes meeting with Kurt's for a moment. "Call me if you need anything." There was a tone of defeat in his voice, like he had given up on something. Kurt wanted to ask him what was wrong, but he had to talk to Jeff. Blaine started walking toward his room, his back to Kurt, who moved his ear up against the door. He didn't hear anyone speaking, so he figured it was safe; Jeff was alone.
He pushed the door open, a small smile on his face. The room was dark, almost pitch black. He could barely see anything, except for a shape on Jeff's bed, but it didn't look like Jeff.
"Simon…" he heard the unmistakable voice of his boyfriend, moaning his ex's name. Kurt's eyes finally adjusted to the dark, revealing Jeff and Simon, both boys half-naked, hair mussed, and looking very much like he had interrupted something very intimate.
"J-Jeff?" Kurt choked over the name. He saw Jeff push Simon off of him, recognition in his face.
"Oh, god, Kurt, Kurt, I-" Jeff rushed toward him, and Kurt saw that not only was his shirt off, but his pants were undone. He stepped back and raised his hand, forcing Jeff to stop a few feet away.
"No." Kurt whispered.
"Kurt, baby, I-" he didn't get a chance to finish; Kurt spun on his heel and left the room, shutting the door behind him. He didn't even pay attention to where he was going, and the tears in his eyes that wouldn't fall were hindering his view.
"Kurt? Kurt, what's wrong?" he heard Blaine's voice, but it sounded so far away. He kept walking.
"Kurt? God, Kurt, what happened?" he felt Blaine's hands on his chest, stopping him from going any further. He opened his mouth to say something, but all that came out was a strangled cry. The next thing he knew, he was being pulled down the hall, Blaine guiding him as they went. He heard Blaine open a door, and he followed him into his dorm. A river of tears was making it's way down his pink cheeks, drifting down his neck into the stiff, starched collar of his standard-issue Dalton button-down. He closed his eyes, willing them to stop.
"Kurt, shh, you're okay. You're going to be okay. Just breathe, then tell me what happened, okay?" He could hear the worry and fear in Blaine's voice. He shook a little when he breathed in, but then he felt Blaine's hands on his cheeks, gently wiping away the tears. "Come sit down. Just relax."
He kept his eyes closed, and let Blaine lead him to his bed. He felt the soft mattress behind his knees, and sat down. He tried to speak, but a shaking sob interrupted him. He felt Blaine sit next to him; he felt him softly pull the blazer off, and undo his tie. He felt Blaine's callused fingers move over his shoelaces, and slide the expensive loafers off his feet. He let Blaine move him a little, letting him lie down on his bed. As soon as he was down, he curled up into a ball, his legs tight against his chest, his chin tucked in.
"I'm here, Kurt. Just tell me what happened." He heard Blaine's voice in his ear, felt his warm breath on his neck. Blaine had curled himself around the taller boy, one arm draped around his own, the other between them, rubbing slow circles into his back. "Whenever you're ready, I'm here."
They laid like that for a while. Wes came and went, leaving once he saw Kurt's slightly shaking body being held by Blaine. It wasn't until Blaine was sure that Kurt had to be asleep that he heard him speak.
"I think he was about to have sex with Simon, Blaine." Blaine's heart broke for him; he didn't deserve this. "I was just a stand-in."
Blaine felt his blood boil. "I'm so sorry, Kurt. I'm so sorry." He let his forehead rest on the back of Kurt's head, breathing in his smell. "You really don't deserve this."
Kurt was quiet, but he was no longer crying. "Blaine…"
"Hmm?"
"Thanks." He didn't say anything else, he just let Blaine hold him.
.....
"Shit." Jeff was pacing.
"I'm sorry."
"Shut up." He snapped at Simon, who was lounging on his bed, his shirt still off.
"You know what you need to do, right?"
"I said 'shut up', so shut up." Jeff snapped. "I fucked up. I shouldn't have… we shouldn't have." He started pacing again.
Simon got up slowly, then reached for his shirt and tie on the floor. "I'm going to get dressed and go before Eric gets here. I imagine you don't want this to get more awkward." Jeff glared at him. He buttoned his shirt, slipped on his shoes, and draped his tie around his neck. Jeff was still pacing back and forth, running his hands through his hair, muttering under his breath, but he stopped when Simon cleared his throat.
"What?" he asked.
He moved closer to Jeff, and put his hands on his cheeks. "You need to break up with him. You can't salvage it, and I know you don't want to." Jeff opened his mouth to argue, but Simon spoke again. "I love you. I want to be with you. Call me once it's really over with you guys." He leaned forward and kissed him, their lips melting against one another, like they were meant to fit together.
Jeff couldn't form any words, but he gave Simon a sad smile as he left. He had to talk to Kurt, that much was obvious. Whether Kurt would listen to him or not, well, he'd find out.
.....
"Fucking asshole."
"Please, calm down."
"No! That fucking hypocrite is the reason that Kurt's not here!" Puck growled, and slammed his fist into his bedroom door.
"Puck! Please!" Quinn pleaded with him from his bed, her hands gripping his quilted bedspread.
"I can't fucking believe that douchebag kissed Kurt! And then fucking threatened to kill him?" Puck was angry, that much was apparent. "And I was just starting to like the kid." He went quiet.
"Come here." Quinn patted the bed next to her. He moved over, and flopped onto the bed. He laid back, his eyes closed. She copied his movements, only she used his firm chest as a pillow. "I know you miss Kurt. We all do."
"That assho-" she smacked his stomach, stopping him from saying anything else.
"Shh. I told you because I know you can't do anything about it. You're still on probation."
"And? Fuck probation, I'm gonna kill Karofsky." He spat, still pissed off.
"Puck, just, leave it for now, okay? And please, don't tell anyone else. I needed to confide in someone, that's it. We're not going to do anything, we're not going to say anything. Not until Kurt decides to tell us himself, okay?"
He'd never admit it, but he liked the way she felt in his arms, the way she smelled. He lied then, for her. "Whatever. I won't do anything." Yet. He felt her smile against his chest.
"Thank you, Noah."
What Quinn didn't know wouldn't hurt her; he'd deal with Karofsky, alright. He'd deal with him the way he should have been dealt with to start with. He was going down.
.....
Next: Kurt goes home for some comfort, but there's no comfort to be found in Lima.