Jan. 17, 2016, 6 p.m.
You've got to hide your love away: Chapter ten
E - Words: 3,944 - Last Updated: Jan 17, 2016 Story: Complete - Chapters: 21/? - Created: Dec 01, 2015 - Updated: Dec 01, 2015 113 0 0 0 0
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”I hope that everyone have read most of the book now, because today I want you to look at your notes you were supposed to take while reading, so that you can start writing an introduction for the essay about the book.”, Blaine starts the lessons by saying on Monday morning. Right after having a flirty little conversation with Kurt before the other students showed up, like usual. He is relieved to se every student pulling up their books and notes to start writing.
He sits down by his desk, pulling up a book for himself to read while the students are working. And of course he can't help but letting his gaze slip away towards Kurt. And sometimes the boy looks up, discretely smiling towards Blaine with bright eyes. Or he's paying attention to his book and notes, and then there's just Blaine looking at him. Admiring those strong cheekbones that are clenching Kurt's teeth together while he is focusing on his book. His bright, blue eyes that Blaine can never seem to get enough of. As if he got lost in them from the start, from that first day at his new job at McKinley high, and he just never got out. Like a labyrinth. Because once you're stuck in those bright blue eyes, you can't help yourself from drowning. But Blaine does not mind drowning and getting lost in Kurt's eyes at all. In fact, he feels like he never wants to stop drowning in them either.
He shakes his head a little. Maybe he shouldn't be staring so much. Someone might notice, but somehow Blaine takes that risk as he looks at the boy one more time. Oh yeah, he is definitely the most beautiful person Blaine has ever seen. And Blaine has to force himself to look away again. But he just can't get enough of that face, of Kurt. And he knows by now, that he is way too deep into this. There is no way back now.
A few weeks pass by and Kurt is perfectly happy with his life. He makes sure to never miss a Glee rehearsal again after getting Rachel suspicious. He spends most of his Monday and Tuesday nights in Blaine's apartment, sometimes even on Fridays. And they sit on that same old couch, listen to that same old record player, and Kurt is perfectly happy with it and just having Blaine's company is more than enough for him. But of course, his teenage mind can't stop itself from, fantasizing, about things. And even though Kurt starts blushing wildly at those thoughts, it's not like it something that he doesn't want to do. Because he wants to. He wants to explore Blaine even more, but he remembers what Blaine said about them two getting intimate while Kurt's still his student, whatever that means. But Kurt still can't help but getting his hopes up sometimes. Sometimes when that eager tongue of Blaine's is exploring his mouth and their kisses are rough yet passionate and there are hands everywhere, so is Kurt wrong for wanting... more? When swollen lips are colliding and it's like that is all they know. Like they do not know anything about this world, except from the softness and shape of each others lips, and what the other one's tongue tastes like.
”Need a time out now?”, Blaine's breath is hot and heavy against Kurt's lips and Kurt just shakes his head because why the hell would he want to stop it when Blaine's short body is on top of him, kissing the boy like that's the only thing he's ever known.
”Oh?”, Blaine breathes out, a little surprised maybe, but he does not fight back the slightest as Kurt grabs his face to pull it even closer. Kurt moans into the kiss. He's done that a couple of times lately, partly because he just can't stop himself from doing it, and partly because he adores the sound that comes from Blaine's throat when he does it.
”Kurt.”, his name leaves Blaine's lips and Kurt's hands are starting to get eager on Blaine's back on top of him.
”Kurt.”, he repeats but this time sounding a little more determined, pulling away a little with a soft smile on his face.
”You remember what I told you about, uhm, illegal actions between teachers and their students?”, his voice is so soft and he looks so adorable with shy eyes and swollen lips, Kurt thinks. And the boy nods, ”Yeah.”
”So maybe we should take a time out now.”, Blaine laughs against Kurt's lips and the boy just sighs.
”I don't want to.”, he protests, clinging onto Blaine's body.
”Kurt.”, Blaine laughs again before inhaling sharply, ”Believe me. I do not want to stop either. But I do not want to cause any trouble, neither for you, nor for me. Okay?”, the hazel eyed man's voice is even softer now and Kurt bites his lips.
”Okay, I get it, I'm sorry.”
”God, don't apologize for being a little eager.”, Blaine smiles and the boy laughs.
”Don't be a tease.”, Kurt warns, raising a sarcastic finger in the air, causing Blaine to laugh. Kurt's favorite sound in the world.
”I was thinking about something.”, Kurt then says, biting his lip a little.
”What?”, Blaine asks casually, taking a sip of his coffee.
”This weekend, if you, well, if you would like to maybe come over to my house?”, Kurt continues with a shaky voice, as if it is the most daring question to ask someone. But to Kurt it kind of is, because they've only been doing this for a few weeks now, hanging around in Blaine's apartment. And Kurt loves that, he really does, but of course he wants Blaine to come over to him as well, so he can make him fancy food and clean his room just for him, and to just make it all feel as normal as possible.
”To your house? Will you be alone? I mean, so no one, you know, sees me. Like Finn or your dad.”, Blaine answers, looking at Kurt with those kind hazel eyes under dark eyelashes.
”No, I'm home alone. My dad and Carole came home from Washington two weeks ago, but now they're both flying back there for some important meeting my dad are going to have or whatever. But anyway, I have the house to myself until Sunday, so it should be fine.”, Kurt explains, shaking his head, ”But if you do not wanna come over, I understand that, you know-”
”Let's say six o' clock on Saturday then?”, Blaine interrupts him with a beautiful grin on his face.
”Really?”, Kurt says, almost sounding a little too excited.
”Really, really.”, Blaine smiles, cupping Kurt's cheeks while kissing his nose, ”Believe me, I also want to make this whole situation as normal as possible, you know?”
Kurt smiles, his eyes meeting hazel ones and their fingers intertwined. Kurt nods, his heart pounding in his ears. He can't help but feeling overly excited about the fact that he will finally have Blaine in his own house. Finally.
The next week, the boy starts planning for having Blaine over this weekend. Throughout the rest of the school week, he sits with his head in the clouds. And he can't seem to focus on any of his classes because all he can think about are a pair of hazel eyes. Hazel eyes belonging to the man who will be with Kurt' in his house, in a few days. Kurt smiles to himself, because it all is starting to feel more normal now. Like they're just like any other couple.
Are they a couple?
Kurt shakes his thoughts away and instead starts thinking about what food he should make Saturday night. What outfit he is going to wear, how he should style his hair, if he should rent a movie. What do normal people do on dates anyway?
Oh wait. Is it a date?
Kurt is not sure about that but somewhere in his mind he decides that yes, it is a date, after receiving a wide smile from Blaine as they walk past each other in the hallway Friday afternoon. He spends his Friday night with talking to his father on the telephone, making himself hot chocolate while watching Sound Of Music. Him and Blaine did not talk at all today. And for some reason Blaine had been looking kind of nervous throughout the whole day. But that glance and smile in the hallway still made Kurt's whole day much better, and maybe the fact that they did not exchange words today, means that they're both preparing their minds for tomorrow night. Not that anything special or extraordinary is going to happen, but still. It's like they're building up the tension until they get to see each other, and talk, and kiss tomorrow night. And Kurt can't wait, because having Blaine's arms around him and Blaine's lips on his own feels too good, so of course he can not wait. Because when he's with Blaine, he feels better than he ever have, the boy thinks.
Because for the first time after his mother's death, he feels like he is able to be completely happy again. Like he can be fixed. He does not have to be the broken boy whose mother died, and who was completely lonely his first year of high school and still hidden in the closet. He does not have do identify as that boy anymore, he can just be whoever he is. And that's thanks to Blaine. Because somehow Blaine, without even realizing he did it, managed to help Kurt fix the mess that was his life. Kurt falls asleep with a smile that same night. And he sure does wake up with one too.
”Hey you.”, six o' clock, Blaine is standing outside the door.
”You look handsome.”, Kurt says casually, smiling.
”And you're quite beautiful yourself.”, Blaine winks, pulling the boy into his arms, ”And with that I mean, like, the most beautiful person i've ever seen.”, he mumbles against Kurt's neck and the boy shivers. Blaine's lips are so soft and gentle on his pale skin and he smells like his regular, amazing, earthy perfume. He also smells like rain and hair gel and raspberry tea and he just smells, warm. Kurt shivers again and he can feel Blaine smile against his neck.
”Did I ever tell you how good you look in turtlenecks?”, Blaine smiles and strokes a hand along Kurt's blushing cheek.
”Come in.”, Kurt manages to say, dragging Blaine by his hand into the house and into the kitchen.
”Wow, it smells delicious in here!”, Blaine states, looking around in the big kitchen.
”I'm glad someone appreciates my new perfume.”, Kurt jokes.
”Sassy.”, Blaine laughs, placing a kiss to Kurt's chin.
”Seriously though, you're going to love this food.”, Kurt pulls Blaine with him to the table covered in candles and different kinds of food.
”Kurt-”, Blaine starts with his eyes wide open looking at the table, ”You didn't have to make all this.”
”I mean, I only ever give you raspberry tea and biscuits.”, Blaine continues with a joke and Kurt laughs.
And Kurt does not let go of Blaine's gaze as they sit down by the table.
”Is there anything that you can't do?”, Blaine asks with his eyes on the food, licking his lips a little.
”Probably not.”, Kurt jokes.
And that dinner turns out perfect. With conversations about their childhoods, talking about old friends and old crushes. They talk about Kurt's mom and they talk about Blaine's brother and Kurt is so happy with how the evening is going. It feels so natural, so normal. And the night gets even better when Kurt shows Blaine around the house, their fingers intertwined.
”And this is my room.”, Kurt says when they finally reach the big white door to his room.
”Wow, when I was at your age I had Star wars sheets and comic books in every corner.”, Blaine says with a grin and Kurt laughs.
”You never told me I was dating a former nerd?”, Kurt teases and Blaine nudges their hips together. And then Kurt swallows loudly because he actually said the word ‘dating' and Blaine did not seem uncomfortable with it. Whatever that means. Kurt smiles.
Are they dating though?
”Your room is really classy, for real. I should've figured that out.”, Blaine winks, walking around in the room, his eyes tracing the books and magazines placed in a shelf.
”Well, what else did you expect.”, Kurt says, crossing his arms before sitting down on his bed, watching the other man continuing to look at the stuff in his room.
”I like it.”, Blaine then decides, looking down at Kurt with a smile before sitting down next to him.
”And I quite like your New York knockoff apartment too.”, Kurt smiles and Blaine pulls him into a light kiss.
Kurt does not mind it at all when he feels Blaine's careful, soft tongue between his lips. And he does not mind it when he is on his back on the bed with Blaine on top of him, because they've done this plenty of times before. But this time Kurt just can't help but to wrap his legs around Blaine and tangle his finger into his gelled hair. And Kurt barely notices but he accidentally presses his heel against Blaine's ass, and oh god, Blaine is moaning into his mouth. Kurt looses his breath. He has no clue of what he is doing but his fingers are slowly tracing up Blaine's chest, starting to unbutton his shirt. And Blaine does not stop him. This is the furthest theyve ever gone and god Kurt enjoys every second of it. Their tongues meet again and now it's Kurt who is moaning into the other man's mouth, a little breathless.
”Kurt-”, Blaine begins and Kurt knows what he is going to say so instead of answering, he pulls Blaine closer with his legs and unbuttons the few last buttons on Blaine's shirt, and oh okay, now Blaine's skin is relieved.
He continues to kiss Kurt before slowly pulling away to look Kurt in the eyes as the boy lets his fingers travel over Blaine's bare chest.
”Kurt, you know we can't do this.”, he breathes and god that hot breath only turns Kurt on even more and he is well aware of how tight his pants are by now.
”Please.”, Kurt hears himself saying and Blaine's eyes darkens, and oh wow now Kurt can feel that Blaine is hard too, pressing against Kurt. Well, this is new, he thinks. How the hell is he supposed to get himself to stop.
”Kurt, I- god.”, Blaine interrupts himself as Kurt starts placing wet kisses all over Blaine's bare chest, and the boy might never have experienced something like this before, but it sure feels like he does know what he is doing, Blaine thinks.
”Kurt, we can't do this, we've talked about this.”, Blaine tries again but hears himself moan instead as Kurt's heels presses against his ass again.
”Just- just something.”, Kurt breathes and he has no clue of what he is asking for but he wants it anyway. Because his body is reacting to all of this in every way possible, ”Please.”
”God.”, is all Blaine manages to say before leaning down to capture Kurt's swollen lips again. And then there they are, two souls, crazy about each other, kissing and pressing against each other. Blaine slowly lets his hands wander to Kurt's shirt. Slowly dragging his fingers along the hem of the white turtleneck and he can feel the boy getting more eager under him and god, this drives them both crazy. And Blaine wants this blue eyed boy so much, almost too much, and sure he might have been fantasizing about this since that very first week, even though he knew it could never happen. But now that it is happening, Blaine just seems to forget about every rule and every law. And so does Kurt.
And right now, Blaine does not care about anything else than the curve of Kurt's soft lips. The feeling of Kurt's legs wrapped around him. The feeling of their fingers intertwined. Desperately holding onto each other. Slowly he starts dragging Kurt's white shirt off and the boy is quick to raise his arms over his head to get it off faster and easier. And then they're skin on skin. Which is completely new, and Kurt does not know how to deal with everything that is going on inside of his body and brain right now, he just knows that he wants to be closer.
Naked chests are pressing against each other, making the two of them feeling each others heartbeats through the skin. Lips are clashing together and tongues are chasing each other, and oh dear god then there's Blaine's hand on Kurt's inner thigh. Stroking it slowly and Kurt's body tells him to just cling onto Blaine's body even more and once again he presses his heels into Blaine's ass just to hear that raspy moan against his lips. Kurt looses his breath and ability to speak. Because all of a sudden Blaine's hand is palming Kurt through his too tight jeans and Kurt opens his mouth to release a a moan he didn't know was hiding in his mouth.
”Shit, the things you do to me.”, Blaine groans into his mouth and Kurt can feel himself getting even harder and he just rolls his hip up against Blaine's, causing the man to pull away, looking at Kurt with darkened eyes. The boy does not breathe again until Blaine is crashing their lips together, more eager than ever before. And all Kurt can think of are their eager tongues, their swollen lips, their teeth clashing together and their hips rolling against each other, Blaine surely does know how to do this, Kurt thinks. Because Blaine's hips are moving in an absolutely perfect pace against his own. Hot and desperate. And there it is again, a raspy moan into Kurt's mouth and fuck this is too much, Kurt thinks. And the boy never expected naked chests sliding against each other and clothed hips rolling together, would feel this good. Kurt places one of his shaky hands on Blaine's ass and squeezes it slowly, smiling when he receives another loud moan from the other man. Kurt have no idea of what he is doing but it surely seems to work out just fine.
And then the sensation of it all just gets too much because Kurt can feel the muscles in his lower stomach tense and his mind go blank.
”Blaine-”, he manages to breathe out and just receives another moan against his sweaty neck.
And then he can feel that same raspy moan, but straight into his ear when Blaine presses his lips against it. Kurt's muscles are tensing up even more and he feels Blaine tensing up too and oh god. The things this man does to him. And then Kurt can't stop himself anymore and just lets go, feeling his eyes shut and his hips roll up one last time before he comes right into his jeans. He is barely aware of Blaine rolling his hips against Kurt one last time before releasing a long, broken moan into his mouth as he comes too.
Kurt doesn't know how to think right now. Because all he can really think of is that he's the one who did that to Blaine, Kurt thinks. Kurt did that. They are breathing heavily by now, with Blaine's face still buried against Kurt's neck.
”Kurt-”, Blaine begins, catching his breath a little and Kurt just continues to breathe heavily, ”And I almost thought you were a virgin.”, he continues, laughing against Kurt's skin.
Kurt's eyes flies open at those words and he can't help himself from laughing, taking those words as a huge compliment.
”What?”, Blaine breathes out in a laugh but Kurt can hear the confusion. Blaine lifts his head up to look Kurt in the eyes.
”Well, I am.”, Kurt points out with a wide smile.
”God.”, Blaine just breathes out before laughing.
”But I'll take that as a compliment.”, Kurt says, placing a wet kiss into Blaine's hair.
”You should.”, Blaine says a little breathless, looking down at Kurt with big eyes that now is back to that perfect shade of hazel again instead of that darkened shade.
”And when you said, no sex until i graduate, you meant-”, Kurt begins but gets interrupted by Blaine almost immediately.
”I meant that I will not fuck you while you're still my student.”, he reminds him with a soft smile and Kurt can't help himself but blushing a little at that sentence.
”Fine.”, he manages to breathe out and Blaine laughs before kissing the boy again.
”Have I told you that you sort of take my breathe away.”, Kurt says with a smile, tracing his fingers along Blaine's cheeks..
”I think i'm falling in love with you.”, Blaine says, holding Kurt's gaze, and Kurt surely did not expect those words to leave the mans mouth right now.
”Wha-”
”And I'm sorry, because I should try to control myself more, and I obviously can't control my body, but neither can I control my mind and my heart and I just- I'm falling in love with you, Kurt.”, he continues, not letting go of Kurt's eyes and Kurt's jaw just drops before leaning up to kiss the other one.
”I think I'm falling in love with you too, and I think it's only ever been a count down since that first coffee incident.”, Kurt breathes out with a shaky smile and Blaine lets out a quiet laugh.
”I want to be with you. I mean, I- I want you, Kurt.”, he answers with a soft voice and his hazel eyes are getting wider every second.
”So be with me. I want you too.”, Kurt says. Cupping his hands around Blaine's cheeks, slowly stroking his fingers along Blaine's jawline.
And Blaine just smiles but they both know that this how it is supposed to be from now on. The two of them, together, and they might not be able to tell the world just yet, but at least they can tell each other. And they can keep reminding each other about that what they have, is how it is supposed to be. What they feel is a natural, normal thing. They just might not be able to show it in public for another year or so, but they're fine with that. As long as they have each other's company, even if it's in secret. But they both understand that this is what they have to to, they have to hide their love away. And for now, they're both fine with that.
A few minutes later, they fall asleep in each others arms, Blaine with half of his body resting on top of Kurt, with his face buried against Kurt's neck. Kurt's lips against Blaine's forehead. Shirtless chests against each other. And they hold on tightly for the rest of the night, like they're protecting each other from everything bad that might come their way. Both of them clueless about what will happen in a few hours.