In all of this, he became cold. He pushed away possibilities of happiness and closed himself off from the world. He didn't care for anything, anyone. He lived in silent misery.

Maybe it wasn't the best option. He could've gone to therapy like his consoler had suggested, or talked about his feelings to his father. But given his father's obvious lack of interest and concern for his son, the latter was out.�

And the former wouldn't help anyone. Therapy was for insane people with diseases and disorders. Blaine wasn't insane. He was just done. Done with loving, caring, everything.

And when you're done you have nothing to lose.

So Blaine had changed. Like Nathan, but he didn't turn to drugs. He would never turn to drugs. Instead, he took his anger out on whomever tested him. His consoler had said he had anger issues. Blaine just added it to the list with his other problems.

After giving his teachers and the students of his jr high hell, he was put into Dalton for his freshman and sophomore year.

It was a place where nothing mattered. Race, religion, sexuality, none of it made any difference. Blaine had a group of people he talked to. He wouldn't necessarily call them friends, but they were good enough. The Warblers had been Blaine's only real source of happiness at the time.

He could let the music flow out of him, portray whatever emotion he felt, become whoever he wanted to be in a song. But it would end too soon. He would be sent back home to be verbally and sometimes physically abused by his father.

Derrick Anderson wasn't always that way. He had been a good father, a great father until Blaine's mother, Julia, died. It was as if some switched inside of him had been flipped. He became a completely different person.

Most of the time it was Nathan who was beaten. Blaine would try to pull his father away, but his twelve year old body wasn't nearly strong enough. After Nathan died, Blaine didn't need to defend him anymore. And after Nathan died, Blaine didn't even try to defend himself.

He let his father hurt him, scream into his ear, dump whiskey into his curls. He wouldn't �try to stop it. Because what was the point? No one wanted him, loved him, anymore. Who would care if he suddenly disappeared?

As the years wore on, Blaine steadily became harder and colder. Seventh and eighth grade were spent in a haze of anger and loneliness. But when Blaine transferred to Dalton, he decided to be someone else. Not the depressed, angry at everything person he had been for two and a half years, but an arrogant above everyone else guy that had everything under control.�

He couldn't be weak at Dalton. He couldn't afford to be. He had to be strong, and if that meant putting up a front, so be it.

In the second half of his freshman year, Blaine began boarding at Dalton. He took this as an advantage. The constant day to day beatings were now only on the weekends.�

Blaine spent his new free time after classes building himself up in the Dalton gym. Soon he could defend himself against his father. Soon his father would stop the abuse all together.

But somehow that was worse. Because now, he was just an inconvenience, not even worth Derrick's time. The only reason he hadn't been kicked out was because his father had appearances to keep up. What would the neighbors say if they saw Derrick Anderson's son out on the streets?�

When Blaine was transferred to McKinley his junior year, he had all the intentions of leaving and never coming back. But that had all changed.

Because he caught those bright blue eyes in that mirror.

Kurt Hummel had single handedly made his life worth living. Kurt had brought him happiness, love, acceptance. He hadn't judged Blaine by his image. He though Blaine was amazing and perfect, when nobody had.

Blaine had a reason to wake up everyday, to believe that maybe, just maybe he could be happy. Really and truly happy.

Kurt Hummel who was far too breakable for his own good. Who needed to be protected at all costs. Who deserved so much better, but by some miracle chose Blaine.

Beautiful, amazing Kurt Hummel.

Blaine felt a stab of pain in his heart at the thought that his reason for living may not live through the night.

---

When Blaine arrived at McKinley High School he had never been more scared in his life. If the frantic call from Finn on Kurt's phone wasn't the cause, then it was seeing Kurt's lifeless body on the tile floor.

The eleven minutes it took for the ambulance to arrive where spent in pure agony. All Blaine could do was hold his unconscience boyfriend in his arms as he rocked back and forth.

Finn stood nearby, pacing, crying. They wanted to help, they tried to wake him up, but nothing would shake him. So Blaine waited. He waited, whispering Kurt's name over and over to himself as the gash on the back of his head bled into a pool on the floor.

The ambulance finally arrived and Kurt was loaded onto the stretcher.�After everything was loaded, Blaine insisted, or begged, the nurses to let him ride with Kurt.

Maybe it was the crying, or the incessant begging, or just to get Blaine to shut up, but they finally let him ride with. Finn said he would wait for Carole and Burt, so that he could be the one to drive.

The ambulance ride brought back gruesome memories. Blaine pushed them aside though, and kept his eyes trained on Kurt.�

"Are you a family member... Or?" the only female nurse asked.

"Boyfriend," Blaine mumbled, not really caring whether or not the woman approved.

"I thought so. I could tell by the way you look at him," the woman said, "You love him."

Blaine nodded, not trusting his voice at the moment. He had so many mixed emotions he didn't know if he should scream or cry.�

The woman gave a sad smile and let silence fall over the back of the ambulance. Blaine stared at his boyfriend's face, searching for any signs. But none came.�

The hospital seemed kind of dead. Few patients sat in the lobby, awaiting the fates of their loved ones. Blaine helped lift the gurney out of the car and followed the nurses as they pushed through the empty hospital. He stayed close to Kurt, jogged to keep up.

They reach a final set of double doors where a doctor rushed out to meet them. He was probably in his late thirties, tall, ashy blonde hair. He looked over Kurt and checked the back of his head.

"Start bandaging the head wound and stop the bleeding, I'll be right there to excess the damage," the doctor said. The nurses pushed Kurt into the doors behind the doctor. Then he turned to Blaine.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Kelly. Are you a family member of the patient?"�

Blaine thought about lying, but decided against it, "No, I'm his boyfriend, Blaine Anderson." he watched for any sign of disapproval, finding none. "Where are you taking him?"

Dr. Kelly frowned slightly, "I'm sorry, Blaine, but Kurt is in critical condition. He won't be allowed visitors until we know whats wrong with him."

Blaine's heart dropped, "You can't. What if he wakes up and I'm not there? What- what if he's scared? You can't not let me see him!"

"Again, I'm sorry. You can wait in the lobby or-"

"No! I have to seen him!" Blaine started to push past the doctor when he felt strong arms wrap around his shoulders.

"Blaine, calm down," he heard Finn say from behind him.

Blaine struggled to break free, screaming and cursing. At some point the screams turned to sobs and the strong arms turned to soft, warm ones.

Blaine let Kurt's step mom hold him as he cried into her shoulder. She led them to a group of chairs where they collapsed in a heap of tears. He could feel Burt pat his back comfortingly and Carole brush through his hair with her fingers.�

He didn't know how or when, but eventually he fell asleep in her embrace, though it would only last an hour before he would wake up from the nightmares of memories from long ago.